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Original poster

Due February 2006 - the sequel !

906 replies

Mama5 · 19/06/2005 21:31

Hi Girls - so here we all are and so far so good (fingers and toes crossed and wheelbarrow loads of baby dust abounding)

Thought I would start a new thread (new name too) as babies being found out about now will just about be into March so we are no longer the absolute newbies which feels good!

So maybe we should collate all our due dates(any one had a dates scan yet??)

Keep it up!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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Frizbe · 07/07/2005 14:41

Oh Hun, sounds like you both have a lot to sort out....have you tried counciling? even if he won't go with you it may be good for yourself, IUKWIM....
I hope your holiday gives you some breathing space...(sorry for no further quick replies, but I have to pop out now)

teuch · 07/07/2005 15:00

Oh LBM...what a shitty sutation! You need to get some professional advice but as a start...(this is Scottish law by the way...could be different down south!)

You are entitled to stay in the house until your children are 16 (or 18 can't remember) so he can't force you to sell, but you can't force him to move out unless him staying would cause undue stress (he's intimidating, violent). A friend of mine re-mortgaged in order to buy her ex out, but be warned that this can take a while and they keep on getting more money as the value goes up EVEN when they have stopped paying the mortgage! This depends on whether you can afford to take on the mortgage yourself.

You can't do ANYTHING with the house without his signature so he can rest assured that he won't lose the house (if anything the law is warped and benefits the deserter at the expense of the remaining partner!!)

Hope your holiday gives you time to get your head round things and I echo the counselling thing - is he maybe just panicking about the responsibility of being a dad 3 times over? Has the baby-making/children distorted his view of you as his partner?

All the best xx

TicTac · 07/07/2005 15:18

LBM I am so sorry, what a horrid situation. {{{hugs}}}. Are you meant to be going on holiday together? Time out might be good right now for you to both figure out what you actually want. You need all your friends and family support too hun so make sure that you keep talking!!

It's great you have a solicitor appointment already booked, but for all of your sakes it would be so much easier if you could sort this out between yourselves and just get the solicitors to rubber stamp everything.

If you are feeling releived then no matter how painful it is...is got to be the right thing hey?

We are all here for you and your little bean so don't loose touch, remember, keep talking! XXXXX

LibbyandBensMummy · 07/07/2005 15:24

thanks for all your support you guys are so good, he has just got home from work and is grumpy as hell it is so weird being here with him knowing he dont love me, the things that are keepin me going are my two other kids thanks god for them, no hubbie was not comin on hoilday well only sat and sun as has work rest of week but not comin at all now told him to off, im going with my kids and a mate of mine and really can not wait. got no money but ha what the hell.

teuch · 07/07/2005 15:33

good luck with everything LBM...

I am driving myself mad - I am crampy as anything today! I have doc's appt to talk about my tummy problems but today i don't know what twinges are due to that or if they might be uterine cramps...

What's the chances of me making the doc 'dopple' me?! I don't even know if they have one in the centre!

Will the worry ever stop!!!

LibbyandBensMummy · 07/07/2005 15:38

i know tell me about it i have been havin really weird feelins in my tummy for ages now, i dont think i ever had them with other two but im sure everything is ok. i have my scan on 21st july so abit apprehensive about it all, stress and worry does not reall go well together. not sleepin either doesnt help sleepin in mates bed which is a bed made up on the floor lol.

Tabs · 07/07/2005 16:02

Oh dear LABM - what a horrible thing to be going through at any time, let alone when you are pregnant! I don't think that I can think of any constructive advice that hasn't already been offered, but I hope that the holiday does you some good and enables you to get things clearer in your own head.

Hugs to you. xx

YeahBut · 07/07/2005 17:25

Oh, LABM, I'm so sorry - just what you don't need at the moment. I think someone has mentioned this, but do you think that this might be a kind of panic attack reaction to the reality of another child? In other words, something that he might get over in time? If you think it might be, and if you want him to stay your dh, have you thought about calling Relate? Even if you think you're definitely going to split, seeing an independent mediator might help you both to sort things out in as non-destructive a way as possible.

I wish I had some more constructive advice. Do you have family or close friends nearby that can help you with the children or just to talk to. You always have us, too. Take care {{{{{hug}}}}}

TicTac · 07/07/2005 17:30

I have had odd cramps from time to time and a felling of quick butterflies at times...weird stuff!

I did ask a friend of mine who has 2 kids when the cramping stops, after she finished laughing she said "never, but when your boobs start to leak you will get over the cramp through embarressment of your wet tops"

I am not sure if that was helpful but I nearly peed myself laughing...never a bad thing!!

Flamesparrow · 07/07/2005 17:33

LABM - I have no words for you, just huge huge hugs.

Anyone else sat sobbing today with London? My sister is there but is safe. I am just watching thinking "what kind of a world am I bringing a child into?"

TicTac · 07/07/2005 19:31

Flamesparrow, I seem to sob at most things at the minute and today was no different. I was meant to set off from home at 11am this morning to work in our London offices today and tomorrow....

Mamatoto · 08/07/2005 09:06

This london stuff not nice is it...... {{{{hugs}}}} to anyone involved

Feeling much less symptomy although sick yesterday morning but felt good after wards anyone else slightly better?

Flamesparrow · 08/07/2005 09:28

I'm feeling more sick today, although so far not actually been sick.

Only 7 weeks though, so I think it will kick in properly about this time next week

teuch · 08/07/2005 10:11

Hi,

I am feeling not to bad today, but in the usual pg neuroticism that is worrying me...

I think I am defo going to order a doppler today!

Frizbe · 08/07/2005 12:36

Hi all, well I feel sick as a very sick thing today, but haven't actually done the business, but am starting to think I'd feel better if I could! I really never felt this bad with dd, so we reckon its either a boy or twins....argh!

Mamatoto · 08/07/2005 12:39

teuch i must say I sympathise and am on mine a few times a day ( driving dh nuts!) but it really helps me to chill. I would advise it...get on ebay!

MrsDoolittle · 08/07/2005 12:51

falmesparrow - I'm the same as you. I am just nauseous in the evening. I've also got so fussy, just the same as last time.
Otherwise, I forget that I am prenant again. I've got so much to do.

TicTac · 08/07/2005 13:36

I fell very sick today although not actually done the business. Do you think that we could hear with a doppler already? I am 10 weeks (ish)

Morgan · 08/07/2005 13:40

Tabs - re next it's only in the directory or online i think - i don't know any stores who do maternity but i may be wrong. Also just got a Vertbaudet catalogue and they go up to size 22 in some styles too and 20 in most other things so should be quite a lot of choice for the winter. Last time i had a summer baby so will have to buy new stuff !

Really tired today and so thirsty - just need to drink and drink - anyone else got this?

Mamatoto · 08/07/2005 14:04

Tic-Tac i am 9+4 and have had mine and heard baby for two days now! Its a bit hit and miss but I would recommend it if you are a worrier like me!

Tabs · 08/07/2005 14:55

I'm caught up in the doppler madness! Just sent DH a link to one on e-bay and said I'd like it (my b'day in 3 weeks), and he's ordered it already, and says I don't have to wait until my b'day, but can start using it as soon at it arrives .

Just hoping and praying that I can find a heartbeat straight away, or it'll worry me more instead of putting my mind at rest!

TicTac · 08/07/2005 15:13

I am overweight, will I still hear through my belly? And where do you put it to listen? I am very interested now!!!

Tabs · 08/07/2005 15:23

Apparently the weight isn't an issue. Check out this thread

Mamatoto · 08/07/2005 17:37

I must say its a pain. Its just hit and miss whether you find it and when you do it can be quite faint and then you can lose it. DH was cross with me cos last night I could not find baby hb and tried for ages ( like over an hour) This morning I found it. Its quite hit and miss but like you I am 9+4 so its early. i have had a lot of spotting though so it re- assures me and stops panicking! I would recommend it whole heartedly despite my problems!

Frizbe · 08/07/2005 18:00

Morgan, was quite thirsty last week, but this seems to have developed into a craving for anything savoury this week? odd stuff eh!