Due may 2010: the second thread

[suey2]

Hello

Morning all! ms not too bad at the mo. dp is off work with supposed swine flu so got two kids to look after instead of one
re dating scans - even with dd our hospital will not allow children in (three years ago) in case there is bad news, which is understandable. my mum is having dd anyway as i remember from last time having to hang around for over two hours! dd would be climbing the walls x

cupcake - yep, me! It was the first symptom i had, and it started from the day AF was due. I find it quite reassuring now i must say, though i suspect i may need to reinvest in my underwear once this pregnancy is over!

memory - I'm still in my jeans, but there is a definate tightening around the waistband. I put it down to bloat and eating more than usual to stave off the ms. I am quite slight though (8.5 stone, 5'7") so a big tea would show up quite quickly anyway! Also, if you've struggled to keep anything down becasue of the ms then aren't you likely to have lost weight anyway?

I definately feel like i'm on the mend now. Based on scan dates i'll be 12 weeks on friday and i'm not so horrifically tired, not as sick (though the polo's are still my constant companion) and generally feeling more alive. I think a lot of it might be psychological because my mind has been put at rest with seeing Ziggy on the move.

Can anyone tell me if things get safer after 12 weeks or is it 13 - the end of the first trimester?

morning all. Hope you are all well! more newbies, we are a busy thread!!

Memorylapse sounds like you had a good appointment!

my jeans are getting very tight, I am so bloated its awful. Got to go buy some leggings and nice long tops i think!

nothing much to report here really. New windows being fitted today, so the house is freeeeeeeeeeezing!!!

Hi all, hope you're ok. Feeling quite low today, keep thinking what have we done, what will I do if I get terrible spd again (bathroom on ground floor, bedroom on 2nd floor) how will I cope with two etc - I know we'll manage somehow but I feel really anxious about the future, and I've done nothing but sit and mope all morning.

Oh James you poor thing. Don't think too much about the future, you are right it will work out no matter what so don't spend too much time dwelling on it.

I've practically become a hermit havent left the house since saturday, just been applying for jobs etc. Must leave the house today because I need to send some tops back to ASOS.

LuckyC Oh man I don't know what to do !! I don't know the law. Please tell me what the right thing to do is. I actually feel terrible because I only plan on working up until 7-8 months and not coming back after....

This is a dumb question but I'm hoping someone can help me, I don't know how the post office works here. If I go in there, will they have a bag I can put everything in to send? And then I can just stick the prepay return label on??

Lotuspalm, you are probably right about me having lost weight..forgot about that!

Still no boiler..we are cold and are considering sueing our LL.

cupcakefairy, so sorry to hear about your husbands job, its not news yiou want at the moment..

James, I would discuss your SPD fears next time you see the midwife and demand, to see a physiotherapist..

I had my consultant appt today, consultant was lovely..had a sense of humour and made me chuckle when I was told I was going down for a scan and was handed a cup of water..Consultant said "why have you given her water..it will still be in her bladder in 10 mins, it wont make it into her bladder that fast!!" he wanted my kidneys scanned as they are joined today by a blood vessel and some fibous tissue and while I was in there they said I may as well have my dating scan..everything looked fine, baby was doing somersaults and they have dated me 11 weeks and one day so my EDD has moved to 4th May..blood clot looks long and thin and the sonagrapher said its actually a tiny amount and that as baby grows the blood is actually being squashed out so he said that they will expect it to re absorb as the pregnancy advances. Consultant was really nice and explained that he would only be concerned if the clot was bigger than the baby..and it wasnt..he was very kind and reassuring

Even though Ive officially had my dating scan and am 5 days off 12 weeks, I still darent go public

meant to say, still be in my STOMACH in 10 mins..grr.

Lola..its illegal to discrimate against a women for being pregnant, so if you disclose your pregnancy in interview and then feel you may have been passed over for a job because of it..you have a case..although you would have to prove it..however you are not legally obliged to disclose your pregnancy during a job interview..in other words..although its obviously better to disclose your pregnancy..a prospective employer is not allowed to ASK if you are pregnant...and obviously theres no saying that you dont actually know you are pregnant...Obviously it depends on the line of work, if you were applying for a job which could pose a risk to your pregnancy, then you need to disclose you are pregnant.
DH is in retail management and regularly has to attend employment law updates so has just spouted this at me!

I've just stumbled across this thread! Can I add my name to the list? I'm 36 and it's number 1! Is any one else out there starting to think that it might be time to organise antenatal classes? My midwife didn't turn up for the first appointment, which I was really disappointed about, but I've rearranged with her for next week, when I also have the first scan! Very excited...

WOW ML that is such good news!!! What a difference a week can make, eh? blimmin MW grrr

Lola you will have to pracel it up yourself, though they usually have stuff to buy to do that at the PO. Don't you have the package it came in? Usually the reply sticky is designed to you over your address on the original package. Also workwise you will not now be entitled to maternity benefits. You may want to consider taking on a temporary contract?

James I totally feel for you. I feel SOOOOO much better this week having had a real downer last week:i hope you bounce back like I did. And as ML said, really push for a women's health physio appointment- i have just seen a patient today- i got her pelvis painfree in 2 weeks and she's 34 weeks pg. It can be done!

I have found out why i felt so shit- i feel guilty for being happy and going on with my life when my dad is dying in the worst possible way and my mum is in bits. I have to allow myself to be excited about this new baby and not allow their situation to entirely dictate how i feel at all times. It's desparately sad, but there is nothing i can do about it and i will help my mum much more if i can manage to section it off and remain upbeat otherwise. When dad finally dies my baby will be a big thing that keeps my mum going, so no need to feel guilty, i think.

oh memorylapse thats great news!! fingers crossed its all good from now on!

suey2 be kind to yourself. Your baby will keep your mum going. How long has your father got left? have you told them about the baby?

hi barrage!
I would get onto your NCT class soon, but they don't start them until you're about 34 weeks IIRC. But worth booking ahead so you can get the one you want

angel x post
Sadly my dad could go on for ages. My mum knows i'm PG and is over the moon (she's a very unselfish person) but we decided not to tell dad. He is so angry and keeps saying 'don't leave me' when my mum finishes her visit to the nursing home. His teeth have turned black in the last few days and he keeps trying to get up and follow my mum, although he can't stand or walk. He is also now deliberatly trying to fall and break something to accelerate his death. Just bloody awful. Thanks for asking though

Oh weight. I think i'll be in my maternity clothes v soon- waistband digging in massively, although i've only put on 2.5 lb.

oh god suey how awful for you all. Thinking of you.

Suey..Im so sorry to hear about your dad..it must be a dificult time dealing with conflicting emotions..distress at seeing your dad ill along with your joy at being pregnant..but dont allow yourself not to enjoy your pregnancy

MemoryLapse wow great news about the clot!! Very happy for you. And thanks so much for the job advice. I'm stuggling to even get to the interview stage at this point, and I'm in IT so desk job, I don't think I will disclose at the interview unless I'm showing majorly.. better not be!! And yeah definately looking for contract jobs.

I wasn't expecting to be entitled to any maternity pay or anything so thats good to know too.

Suey2 thanks for advice. Yeah I do but it has a big rip across the top, guess I will jsut try find some masking tape. Very sorry to hear about your dad too but you are so right, it will keep your mum going and you need to get excited about it.

Memorylapse- that's really good news, many congrats on the scan.

Suey - what an awful position to be in, I'm so sorry for you and your family. I think you are right to try and section it off from your baby, you are allowed to enjoy your pg, whatever else is happening, and I think you're right that the new life will help your Mum focus on the future. It is a terrible situation though.

Hi Barrage and welcome. IME, you are referred for NHS antenatal classes automatically by your MW and I seem to remember attending when I was 30 weeks+. They were not that useful TBH but I did meet four lovely women who I still meet regularly and were a great deal of support. I also booked in the NCT classes in my area, which were more useful if terms of info and again I am still in touch with the couples that we met on the course. But again I seem to remember being around 30 weeks when I attended. Although I did book on to the NCT classes early as they do get full up quickly in my area so it's worthwhile checking out their website sooner rather than later.

Right back to work - am working from home today but am so tired I am struggling to resist going upstairs for a nap! Have also rung for my scan date - 9th Nov !!! Feels like ages away!!! I have also decided to tell my branch manager and my team manager about the pg tomorrow as I am now 9 weeks and I need to give them as much time as possible to arrange cover for my work as I am in quite a specialist area. Not really looking forward to their reactions...

obviously Im not out of the woods yet.. but the consultant doesnt seem concerned.

Lola- DH has just informed me that if he remembers correctly..you would still be entitled to maternity pay etc.

no ML but the fact you have made it this far and things seem to be getting better is good. Fingers crossed for you

lola
this is a good guide. You have to be employed for 26 weeks by 15 weeks before your due date. The website gives you loasd of info re what you may be entitled to.

Hmm thanks everyone!! That means I have to be employed for 1 week before I was even pregnant! Hehe. Which I definately have not been. It's all good I was not counting on m.pay anyway and there is a few other options too.

Cheers suey2 and memorylapse

Thanks folks, sorry for moaning, I'm just a bit scared of going from one to two. Ds was such an easy baby I've always thought the next one is bound to be a nightmare.

Memorylapse, great news! Pleased for you.

Suey, you've nothing to feel guilty about, a baby is a wonderful thing and it will help your mum - and you!- to get through this. It's happened now for a reason. I hope your dad isn't suffering too much.

Wow, this thread moves so quickly! I haven't checked in for a couple of days and so much to catch up on! Welcome to all newbies and sorry to all those with bad news

Memorylapse - so glad about your appointment with the consultant That sounds like great news for you.

Suey2 - so sorry about your Dad, that must be really tough

Can anyone remember when you are legally obliged to inform your work of pregnancy? I got offered a job at about 5 weeks, which starts on 26th October. I haven't mentioned the pregnancy yet (I wouldn't be getting maternity pay from them anyway) but not sure whether I should say something before I start?

Re classes - I only went to NHS classes but they weren't that great. I didn't like the midwife who ran them very much so it was probably more my problem than anything else! I started them quite late as well so missed the last two because I was in labour then had DD so I'd already found out most things I needed to know from MN. I would have liked to have met some other mums though.

I've been feeling soooo rough - yesterday I could hardly move from the sofa (literally) but feeling better today . I felt better enough today to make candles though so I'm feeling v.proud of myself.

Hello, Please can I join your gang! I am due on the 13th of May, its my first pregancy and can not wait for the scan. The last few days I have actually started to feel a little better (but I am too scared to say that out loud incase the nausea creeps back!) Good luck to everyone

Welcome Kazmog - It's my first too and we're the same age (I've just read your thread on the pregnancy page). I'm due around 17th May but still feeling rubbish - hope mine eases soon too!

Suey2 - I really feel for you; your baby was obviously meant to be though so take care of yourself x

Lola...you may be entitled to maternity allowance rather than SMP..so all is not lost