The wagon needs to make room for the imminent arrival....

[glaskham]

New thread ladies... lets hope its a good un!!

Births:
Kay - 12th December - 6:49pm - Dylan George - 10lbs 5ozs
Teuch- - - boy
Pop - 23rd December - twin boys, Hugo & Henry
Nat - 27th December - 8:36pm - Mikey Bradley - 6lb 10.5oz
Gin - 16th Jan- Girl - 7.25am- details tbc
Tink- 19th Jan - Girl - 1.51pm - Bracken Hope Willow - 8lbs 7oz
Astarte - 16th Feb - Girl - 8lb 12oz
Glask - 20th Feb - Girl - 7.47pm - Ruby Marie 4lb (8wks prem)
LardyBump - 21st Feb- Boy - 8lb 12oz
HappyNappies- 27th Feb- Boy - 12.01am 9lb13 Edward James Roy
Playing - 4th March - boy - 5 lb 12 oz - Edward Lewis Stainer
Starshinetiger - 15th March - girl - 7lb 1 oz - Charlotte Carys Rose
GYo - 22nd March 9.55am- girl - 10 lbs 12 oz -
Cosmo - 2nd April - girl - April Victoria - 8.51am - 6lb 9
Gruff - 15th April - boy - 8lb 2 oz - 6.02am Zachary John Graham
Ses - 9th May - boy - 8lb 9oz - 10.17am Owen Edward
MINM- .......

Weeks list:
Diege - 38 weeks, 2 left to go. Boy!!!!(21st June)
LBOT - 33 weeks, 7 left to go BOY! (24th July)
KookyKid - 26 weeks, 14 weeks to go (2nd Sept) BOY!
Idreamofbeanie - 24 weeks (due 27th Sept) GIRL!
Sparklytwinkletoes - 19 weeks (due 6th Oct)
BB - 18 weeks (EDD 30th oct)
Moosy - 14 weeks (EDD 6th Dec)
Claire236 - 5 weeks (EDD 7 Dec)

Girls = 8
Boys= 9 (3 more still insitu)
Surprise = 10
Unknowns (yet) = 3

Scan list:
STT - 20 week scan 21st May
BB - 20 week scan 11th june 09 (not finding out sex)
Moosy - 20 week scan 22nd July

MW apps list:
IDOB- 24 week apt 9th June
BB- 17th july MW, Antenatal clinic 15th june
LBOT - 36 week appointment, 25 June
Diege - 38 week appointment, 11th June.

Mat leave countdown:
Diege - Annual leave, proper mat leave starting 15th June.
LBOT - last day 17 July (I think!) 26 days to go
BB- AGES!!!
IDOB - 4th September, 13 weeks.

Babys Age
Kayz's Dylan - 26 weeks
Tinks Bracken - 20 weeks
Glaskham's Ruby - 16 weeks
Gyo's small giraffe - 10 weeks
Cosmo baby - 8 weeks
Ses's Owen - 3 weeks

Diege- I'm not sure what happened properly which you feel let down about during the labour... the fact things weren't explained? or that you weren't listened to... but i've had exactly the same feelings about DD2's birth too... mainly the week before the birth when they could have started labour or could have done a section... i still have tons of questions and still feel really really upset about what happened- and she'll be 4mths old tomorrow!! I cry about it, talk to DH about it... but at the end of the day she's here and she's healthy despite all the odds... I just keep thanking my lucky stars.

I think having a meeting to discuss your notes is a good idea... i think i may ask for a copy of my notes so i can go over things in my head. I'm going to talk to my HV a little more next week as she's really nice and i can actually talk to her properly.

I do agree that you have to move forward and whats done is done... but i do also know how hard it is to get your head around why things happened etc... and they do so much without really telling you why/what they are doing.

Diege DD's birth was very bad. We nearly lost her. I was rushed for emcs, I was given a spinal block but her heart rate fell and didn't come back up. Registrar (sp?) decided they didn't have 30 mins to wait for the drugs to work so she gave me the gas and air to suck on and cut me down below and got her out that way with forcepts, loads more to the story but wont bore you with the grizzly details......

DS's birth was a breaze in comparison but not plain sailing. He had the cord around his throat twice and was using it as a bungie he was out then he was in then he was out then he was in.. His HR dropped and wouldn't come back up so the mw pulled em cord and the same registrar rushed in and helped me with vontouse (sp?)!!

I have never done it all on my own and now never will, it took a long time to get over DD's birth but I was ok after ds's!

Lovely registrar saved the life of both my babies!!

I have been so stupid. Was cooking chicken and pesto for dinner and remembered I couldn't haved pesto because it has cheese in it. So put some chicken to one side and looked in cupboard (shopping day tomorrow) and there was a packet of uncle bens mushroom rice in there. So I had that with chicken and avocado... I have just checked the packet (yes I know i should have done this before i ate it) and it contains milk... Argh mushroom rice for gods sake... I have just put us back two weeks.....

Hi!

Can you tell DS is starting to get a bit more settled? I'm not posting so much as I'm not stuckon the sofa feeding so much!

Diege - I can only echo what others have said really. I know how let down I felt when I realised I'd have to have a CS. I was so geared up for going through labour and felt cheated to not have that. I had loads of people tell me how lucky I was not to have to go through labour and that really didn't help.
Sounds like you had a much tougher time though and my CS with 2 days notice is very different to an emergency CS combined with everything else you went through.
I think writing stuff down and going through your notes will be the best way to help you move on. It is very difficult when we spend so much time planning and visualising the birth we want in advance and then that doesn't happen and I can onlyimagine adding into that not having had full explanations of why.
As for milk coming in, IME the CS does delay it. Hope it's happened for you now or happens soon.

yes i second that ses- it wasn't until DD was about 4 days old that my milk came in... i know some of that will be due to expressing and not actually feeding... but it came in on day 2 with the other DC's... and my boobs are experts at BFing... it was a bit different this time round. I do think lots of that was due to the CS.

Hello,

Diege, sorry you feel so down. i do think it will help to go through it with the MW.

Sorry on laptop so stupid broken keyboard.

Hope everyone is ok. Been out today and now got VV painful wrist and headache. Will promise to catch up tomorrow.

Diege, just heard the terrible news!! Poor Nadal, what will you do during Wimbledon now???

Diege - sorry for feeling down. Remember it is normal to feel down due to hormones at the moment and the birth experience will only exacerbate this. Totally second the advice you have had from others to follow up with meeting with midwives and to write it all down (think I will take the writing down advice myself). It is best to do it now, so that you can grieve and move on. I still have very teary moments about the whole experience with DD now and that's 3 months on. Birth itself was fine (can't complain about DS or DD's birth), but I am still cut up about the whole experience of being separated from DD straight away, spending first 2.5 weeks at GOSH, etc. With DS I felt that I wanted to get out of hospital straight away, as I thought midwives would be looking at me and realising I didn't have a clue. This time round I was totally planning (once I was actually in hospital and not at home) to enjoy the experience of having brekkie provided and some quality time with my new DC - obviously that was all taken away with the complications. I know we're not going to have another child and it would be silly to just to have a good experience (which is certainly not guaranteed), but I do feel still quite upset about it. DD got absolutely the best care at GOSH, but if I so much as looked teary, the nurses said "Oh, what's wrong? Don't worry, it will be fine." and I feel now that I didn't really get the opportunity to vent or talk about my feelings (for that matter neither did DH). HV came round last week for 3 month check on how I was doing and to give me a barrowload of leaflets on everything from safety to teething to weaning. She asked several times "And how are you doing?", but of course I was having a good day and just did the stiff upper lip thing of "oh, you know, good and bad, I'm fine", when what I really could/should(?) have said is "I really need to talk through with someone the whole experience and get it off my chest, but I don't know who to talk to". Am teary as I write this. Sorry for me, me post, what I really mean is that you should absolutely talk it out/grieve and then you can move on to enjoying Jacob. I think I in part just needed to write all that out.
Am also still very sleep deprived - after the luxury of last Sat night where DD only woke 2x for quick feed and back down between 8pm and 6am, she has been really unsettled all week. Am going to try her on bottle of EBM for last evening feed tonight to see if that helps (is a good evening as she has gone down by 7.55pm). Am only really stressing about it as she has her next operation (well, not operation as such - is camera inside her bladder, but she has to go under GA for it) a week on Tues and it means she won't be able to feed for 4-6 hours beforehand (find out on Mon how long it is) and she would normally feed at least 2x in that period - she is down for 7.30am, so they do their best to do babies early, which would all be well and good if she was sleeping through a decent amount to 7am!
Anyway, enough of me - hope you all have lovely Friday evenings. Have persuaded DH that we can go out to lunch tomorrow so we don't have to wash up or cook - only Nandos or Tootsies, but still fine with me

Bump - don't worry about the mushroom rice putting you back 2 weeks, it will have some effect, but not the same effect as if you were regularly eating dairy. You would expect some sickiness in the feed that comes through but not constant. It is a pain the things they put dairy in . Do you have a Waitrose near you - we had a Thai takeout meal for 2 from there the other week and it had no dairy in. Also, they do dairyfree pesto in the free from ranges in most supermarkets - doesn't taste quite the same, but if you regularly eat it, you might find it okay.

Sorry for all the poor birth experiences coming through. For LBOT/IDOB and others due soon it isn't always bad - I had very speedy labours but managed on G&A and water birth, so please don't start worrying!

Nat - love the house, so glad things are getting sorted. Fingers crossed that the right one is available at the right time.

Sorky - how did DD's trial day at school go? Thing it might have been today?!

Diege - love the photo of Jacob - so cute (as are the girls of course!)
LBOT - meant to say, people should know that comments about bumps are no go. The day before DD was born I had so many women say to me (I was a week of due date) "Oh, I was huge at that stage - had such a big bump" (now I wasn't exactly small I don't think), but all I thought was "Are you trying to say I can't grow my baby properly?" (obviously now know I couldn't ), but just goes to show that there is no good way of commenting a women on her bump, other than to say "You are glowing"!

Hi Star! Enjoy your lunch tomorrow. I'm quickly learning that lunch out anywhere is a huge treat! Managed lunch at Costa with my mum today which (whoops!) involved a hot chocolate with marshmallows and whipped cream

Bumpy - it may well only be a tiny amount of milk product. Hope you have a good night.

Nat - that house looks gorgeous!

Kay - hope your head and wrist improve

LBOT - I agree with Star, people should not comment on bump size!! I had one friend tell me she'd never seen anyone so big I tried to politely point out that she'd never really known anyone close to her be pg (true!) so she wouldn't really know!

I think I can temporarily take back my earlier post about DS being more settled. He's pretty much been constantly feeding from me since 5.30pm!! I guess he is 6 weeks tomorrow so maybe he's hitting a growth spurt!?!

It's not helped that I had a bit of expressed BM to give him and DH accidentally put it in a non-sterilised bottle. I'm not annoyed with DH as he was trying to help, just frustrated.
Am a little worried that DH isn't findin fatherhood what he expected. He's said a few negative comments like "Mummy's better at changing nappies than Daddy" and after this evening's waste of BM "I'm fucking useless". This isn't like him. I'm trying to ignore any negatives and just thank him for positives at the moment. I've also got him a really cute Fathers Day card from Photobox with 2 piccies of him and DS on.

Evening/ Morning

Home from hols (sad) Cat still alive so cant complain

Diege- im so sorry you are feeling sad. Its not surprising given your plans for a more natural labour and then what happened. Please post here as much as you need, no need to catch up on the news just use the wagon to let off steam. You?ve been huge part of wagon strenghth for the last year that i?ve been here so please take some back. Faxing over hugs and supportive triple choc brownies. Ive no real comments to add but the others have great advice. You ladies with traumatic births are amazingly strong. Childbirth and emotions that followed was hugely emotional experience, i cant begin to imagine how you feel when things are difficult.

Weird that many DH/DPs have public nappy aversion. Mine is so ?new man? with dd, pushing pram, using sling etc i?ve no idea why he wont go in changing rooms etc. Must be fear of the public poo mopping experience!!! Clearly needs more practice

Ses, reckon DH probably sees how good you are at these things as you do it 24/7 and probably realises he isn?t as skilled yet. Its hard balance between doing things yourself to get them done/ done to your standard vs letting partners be more involved. I have to really let go of my inner control freak and ?let? DH do stuff and ignore the badly fitted nappies, random clothing choices and other things ? going on holiday really helped with that. We are much better together with DD now AND had many lunch meals out. Dont think I?ve fed in so many random places in one week! Really is great being able to do it any time, anywhere. (best place was lay-by on the A303!) About the EBM thing, DH did something similar (threw it away rather than pouring it into storage bag) was soooo annoying but had to leave it as he was clearly annoyed with himself.

LBOT- that comment was insensitive and unkind like others, I had similar. The worse being at 14weeks being greeted by DH?s friends who?d just been told about the pregnancy. One guy said ?hello fatty?. I know he was being friendly and joking but given that I?ve got way too many weight/ body issues and 14wks is that weird stage where you do just look an odd shape (1st time round anyway) and not fat I was quite upset. Think LB?s retort is best I?ve heard so far!

LB, Bumps (must get with the name changes!!) think you take the award from the wagon for having the most shite to deal with and hanging in there. Hope DS is ok tonight and DD continues to succeed with the potty

Star- so sorry you are still suffering so much with the sleep deprivation. Hope it improves for you soon.

Hi everyone else sorry for stuff I?ve missed.

We are going back to the NCT tomorrow to do a life with a new baby talk to an antenatal group. DH is coming too to give the man?s perspective. Looking forward to it but really hope DD dozes in the pram... its during the time she has been napping in the pram on holiday.

Right better go as DD is in odd position on me.

lbot- meant to write 14wks when you dont look pregnant not fat!!

Oh Diege
Let it all out chick, we didn't talk about dd1's birth, just did the whole "well she's here, that's the main thing" spiel and a year later, when we fell with ds1, it resurfaced and nearly finished our marriage. Ds1 was 18 months before everything was put to bed and we could let it go
Everyones advice is superb, do keep talking about it, explain to your lovely Dh that you might go on and on about it, but that you need to do that.
You do need to grieve for the birth you didn't have, and actually it isn't good enough that he's here and healthy, you were robbed and should know why.

Hope the feeding is going well, he'll settle down to a better pattern soon I'm sure

Kayz what's up with ol' monkey-heed is he out of Wimbledon?

This Wagon is getting snug!
You're all giving far too many brownies away, we'll have no choice to be 'Huggin'-Huns' at this rate, we won't be able to move for each other and I'm not chipping in for an extension, so just pack it in!

Trying to catch up desperately....
Star, good luck for LO's op, it is an op in my book, perhaps they'll do her first with her feeding regularly. Dd2 still can't go longer than 3 hours during the day, 4 during the night and she's nearly 5 months.
Dd1's foray into school went well thanks, well for her anyway, she wants to do the other sessions before deciding.

Bumpy how the heck can milk possibly add to mushroom rice? It's mushroom and rice fgs, foopid stuckers!
Hope it doesn't upset him to much

Nat those houses looked lovely, can't believe how cheap they are . Where I live they would be about 300K to buy, which is nowhere near £800 pcm for rental.

LBOT it's nearly showtime for you! How exciting!

GYo I thought I might have paraded the dawn with you today as I was up, but have missed you again, glad you had a lovely holiday

Ses, I wonder if there might be mileage in giving Dh all the care other than feeding for a few days.
Just from friends experience, once the ol' chestnut 'mummys better....' is trotted out, they rarely do anything again.
You could perhaps make an excuse to go to the toilet and hand him over to burp and change him, everytime!
Get him to push the pram everywhere, in essence get him to do everything. It might be easy to do it yourself now, but a few months down the line he could regret not doing it iyswim. Just a thought, tell me if its rubbish, I won't mind
I leave the room when Dh puts on a nappy etc, then I don't see it happen
It's a huge change being a Dad, Dh said it wasn't fair, I'd had 9 months to prepare, he only took his head out of the sand a month before she arrived

Hello to everyone! Can't remember anything else, but will reread and post at some point today

Morning,

Yes Sorky, monkey head-- Nadal has pulled out of Wimbledon because of his knee. I do feel sorry for him and Diege of course. But it means that Federer can get his trophy back!! Or at least Murray stands a good chance of getting to the final.

Nat, that house is really nice!!! Hope it is still available when you want to move.

Hope everyone is ok.

Morning!

It's a shame about Nadal. A Wimbledon final with Murray and Federer would be good but I'd rather Murray had had the chance to knock out Nadal first!

Sorky - thanks, that sounds a good idea to use the "going to the loo" trick. May not work 100% of the time but think it will help. Also a bit of asking him what he thinks DS needs, eg feeding, winding, nappy change as I do tend to think I know now and automatically get on with it. DH might feel more able if I ask for his advice more.
DS is about to start smiling anytime (I'm sure he's been close a couple of times) and part of me really hopes that DH gets his first big wide smile.

GYo - sounds like your holiday was great and a big help in the teamwork with DH. Maybe that would help us but no chance anytime soon.

Right DH has asked for a lie in today as he's had a long week at work so I think we can try and have a lie in too. DS is just about finishing his feed so I'll try and lie down with him for an hour or so again.
Then we're off to my parents' to see my "baby" brother who turns 30 today!

Morning... another fairly good night with DD2 last night again... 9.30pm till 3.30am, had a little feed then back to bed till 6.30am...

Has been feeding constantly since then though...

Right ladies... my period is a good week late... i'm putting it down to being ill... I haven't told DH but did casually say 'my period is due any day now... i expected it to be here already' last night... I dont wanna panic, but want constructive advise... I dont want to spend money on tests only to get a negative and know i've wasted money as i'm 99% certain i'm not pg... so do i just wait it out a few more days before considering buying a test... or do i waste the money now?

Waste the money!!!! It will put your mind at ease!!!

haha- i knew you'd say that Kays!!

Thing is I dont wanna do a test because i dont think i'm pg... but then i kinda do as it would put my mind at rest... argh!!

Just do it!!! I'll post you £10 to cover the blooming test!!!!! Go on, you know it is the only way to put your mind at rest!!!!

haha- dont be silly... i mean i dont mind spending the money... but if i did a test and an hour later my AF arrived i'd just think i'd wasted the money...

I'll take over from Nat just this once.

TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

well Kayz... you may have single handed-ly made me take a trip to the chemists this morning... I'm gonna feel a right scally tho- taking my 3 under 5's in to buy a PG test for myself!!

You could be buying it for a friend, sister, cousin!!!

yeah... just can't help but think buying a test makes it look like i think i'm pg... when i dont at all... it'd be a nightmare if i was... argh- i dont even wanna think about the possibility that i am!!