Due April 2009 - Chapter 32: Shake your pom poms, Shake your pom poms, Shake your pom poms!!!

[BabyBolat]

Hope no one minds I gave Nutty the vote after her epic birth!

Ginger - ((((((hugs))))) - families are hard work, and it's especially hard when the two sets of parents have very different ways of doing things. DHs family tend to err on the side of large, mass catered family gatherings whereas my family has always been just Mom, Dad, me and my brother, with the odd grandparent. If my MIL was still alive, I think we'd have had the same situation, with the need for some kind of large party etc. Sorry that what should have been a nice weekend was ruined for you. Not ungrateful to feel that way - parents need to try to understand that what they want is not necessarily what you want. And definitely not a disservice to little V. She has a big family who will all love her very much, and way down the line she will get used to the big family dos, and you can roll your eyes together and smile at the fuss!

Nuts - Could DH have the snip? It's a far less traumatic operation.

Updated for JennyPenny22 aka Soon2be...

The baby list..

12 Feb: Skiingone: MARIANNA 4lb 4oz
20 Feb: Glaskham: RUBY MARIE 4lb 3oz
04 Mar: Barbarella: ESTELLA, ROSANNA, OTIS
05 Mar: Kazkiss: ISABELLE FLORENCE 4lb 6oz & OLIVER THOMAS 3lb 7oz
15 Mar: Babypringle: OSCAR WILLIAM 7lb 2oz
28 Mar: Claireykitten: VIOLET ROSE 7lb 9oz
29 Mar: WhatFreshHell: FELIX DEVLIN ALEXANDER 10lb 5.5oz
31 Mar: Mumblemum: ORSON XERXES
02 Apr: Oddeyes: ELEANOR 9lb 8oz
03 Apr: Bleuravin: MEGAN LILLIAN CONSTANCE
03 Apr: Bumpalump: JACOB 8lb
04 Apr: BabyBolat: KARAHAN 6lb 5oz
05 Apr: Mrsfossil: ISLA LILIAN 7lb 10oz
06 Apr: BoffinMum: FELIX DAVID GORDON 7lb 9oz
11 Apr: SpringySunshine: GEORGE NATHAN 8lb 15oz
11 Apr: RachelinScotland: CLEMENT JAMES 8lb 14oz
11 Apr: Lou031205: ISLA SOPHIA 7lb 9oz
11 Apr: Electra: ISABELLA CAROLINE 6lb 3oz
11 Apr: AuldAlliance: ALEXANDRE 7lb 6oz
12 Apr: Phdlife: Name TBA GIRL 9lb 3oz
13 Apr: MathsMummy27: AMELIA CHARLOTTE
14 Apr: Purlease: ADAM 9lb 2oz
15 Apr: Juwesm: HUGO GEORGE 9lb 2oz
15 Apr: Bronze: ISAAC JOHN
15 Apr: Kalikaroo: Name TBA BOY 8lb
15 Apr: Minush: ZAFIRAH ROSA 7lb 12oz
15 Apr: FatandFedup: EMILIA ROSE 7lb 6oz
16 Apr: PuzzleRocks: HOLLY ELIZABETH 8lb
16 Apr: Brettgirl: HANNAH GRACE 6lb 15oz
16 Apr: ReallyTired: Name TBA GIRL
18 Apr: Staryeyed: Name TBA BOY 7lb 11oz
20 Apr: LuLuBai: SEBASTIAN 9lb
20 Apr: Swaliswan: BETH 7lb 9oz
21 Apr: Kittycatisgettingfat: GABRIELLA AUDREY BIANCA
21 Apr: B52s: SAM MARTIN 7lb 9oz
21 Apr: Schulte: HAZEL LOIS 7lb 9 oz
23 Apr: Tristaleejac: LEWIN 8lb 4oz
23 Apr: NuttyTaff: TIAHNA SKYE 8lb 8oz
23 Apr: Purplemonkeydishwasher: ISLA ELIZABETH 8lb 14oz
24 Apr: JennyPenny22 (was Soon2be): TALIA 7lb 6oz
26 Apr: Carameli: THEO LAURENCE 7lb 6oz
26 Apr: Surprisenumber3: EVIE ANNE 8lb 2oz
26 Apr: Bicnod: OSCAR MATTHEW 8lb 1oz
27 Apr: Lauren61: OLIVER STEPHEN 7lb 7oz
27 Apr: Gingersarah: VERONICA ROISIN 9lb 1oz
30 Apr: MegBusset: ARCHIE 8lb 15oz
03 May: Conkertree: Name TBA BOY 8lbs 8oz

Still to hatch:

24 Apr: Frekkles:
25 Apr: TarteTatin:
27 Apr: Ilovesummer:
28 Apr: Satheresitting:

Thanks again to everyone for the empathy & support. Things are okay here. I'm massively on the back foot & feeling very hurt & a bit scared, but he seems to be fine. Which is a bit sinister, really. It feels like he's just pretending. My self-esteem is pretty much rock bottom & the one person I want to cuddle me & make it okay is the person I'm scared of allowing myself to be invested in right now. He tells me that he loves me every 5 minutes at the moment, but it's just forced & ridiculous. But if I don't say it back then he gets all upset I think we will be okay, though. It does make me wonder what really happened at that counselling appointment. & Nutty, I'm sorry that you've had a similar thing It's horrible & we're far too fabulous for this rubbish! xx

Yay for conker! Can't wait for details!

Ju! A Doktor Power magic eraser! I'm so pleased for you! Yay! I still feel a bit emotionally attached to mine, even though it's sitting all alone, neglected

frekkles, 'No wonder they weren't allowed the vote' made me laugh I don't remember the last time I could make a reasoned decision

Public BFing - I've BF everywhere already. In front of every man in my family, walking down the road, on the tram, in restaurants, in the bank... People do give funny looks, but nobody's said anything yet

Puzzle, I love your 'puzzle monkey' & 'squeaky mouse' names Can I borrow BB's cleaning services after you?

This soon2be / Jenny thing is going to really confuse me

& BB, yes - you really do have a problem. You need someone to bop you over the head so you have a bit of time unconscious, because you're not going to rest otherwise

Argh, I've missed loads! Stupid slow one-handed typing.

Aaaargh

Don't talk to me about HVs! Stupid cow phoned me last week to say she'd come to see me today at 10am. Well, nothing. At lunchtime she phoned to say she had been TWICE, at 10 and 11, and BANGED on my door. It's a blatant lie because we were all in the sitting room i.e. right behind the front door and listening out for someone knocking and I swear there was NOTHING. Now I have to wait around for her this afternoon and it's sunny and we want to go out.

Paranoid mum alert. You remember I asked about the other LOs choking? Well Hazel has done it very badly a few times, when she brings up tiny amounts of milk it gets stuck in her nose/throat and she goes purple and stops breathing and waves her arms about for help. I have to pretty much hold her upside down to get it out and get her to breathe again. It's absolutely terrifying especially because I am worried she might do it when I am asleep, or not in the same room. Anyone else experiencing this kind of choking???

Congratulations Conker!!!

Nutty, I almost hope that your daughter does end up being called Pancake on all legal documents

Sarah, that does sound like a complete nightmare. My parents are fab with stuff like this, & PIL are totally the opposite to the point of being hilarious. Last time they visited, we told them that we wouldn't be feeding them. So they got a McDonalds (walking distance from our flat) on the way here & made a point of sitting in the restaurant to eat it so as to avoid buying us any Either way, I don't end up having huge formal things like that going on & I'm so pleased. I can't imagine how you survived it! I hope you're not too stressed out still xx

Nutty I think that it may be an idea to wait for anything permanent - you should be 100% sure. No experience of the implant or injection, but they're two of the possibilities I'm looking at as well. Would the coil be a possibility for you as well? Just as another alternative to consider. & I second Puzzle's suggestion about DH?

Schulte, we've not had choking like that. I read that the way to help choking babies is to lie them, face down, across your lap with their head hanging lower than the rest of their body & then tap their backs. I don't know how effective it is (& I see that you've got it sussed anyway) but that's the 'official' line, I think

No wonder you're angry about your HV, too! How awful of her to not only not turn up, but to lie!

Hello all, I haven't been on here for a few months, I just never managed to post very often, then I got thrown off the list and everybody seemed to know each other so well that I didn't feel i could join in as the list moved too quickly for me to catch up each time I got on here, sorry would like to join in on the post-natal group when it starts up though, so just wanted to say congratulations for all the arrivals and see if it's ok to add myself to the birth list?

DD arrived 12th April (EDD 7th), after about 7 hours from start of contractions. MW had said a few days earlier she was in a good position (DS was back-to-back), so I was feeling very positive, MW arrived around 3am (hoping for a home birth) but a few hours in and was told she was back-to-back also. So, lots of back pain, then mec in waters when they went, so a quick transfer to hospital, and DD arrived 30m later, having turned at the very last minute with some wiggling on the bed from lying sideways onto my back. Plenty of G&A, and DD a whopping 9lb 9oz! Was very relieved as a much more positive experience this time round. Recovery was so much quicker and felt a lot better about it all and the fact that I managed to deliver her myself despite the position and her size - DS was ventouse and last minute epi, so couldn't feel to push and didn't feel him coming out (despite getting to 10cm before they put the epi in).

DD feeding loads at the moment, and seems very content so far, VERY LOUD when she wants something! DS told nursery baba is noisy, bless him. Am sure it's just 3wk growth spurt, but it seems like she's on for hours sometimes, or 10m gap and back on. Have thankfully moved on from the painful cracked nipple stage (that was more painful than the stitches in the first week).

Hope everybody is enjoying their new arrivals and labour vibes for those still waiting...

hello!

just popped on for a moment and....
YAY FOR CONKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hope everyone else is ok.
don't really have time to catch up properly but on the bit i have read:

schulte - DD does that choking thing when I'm feeding her and the milk comes out too fast. scares the shit out of me. and have notices a bit of milk coming out her nose one while she was sleeping.

nutty - I got the injection once. unfortunately it made me really really ill. and once you've got it in you, you have to wait it our. GP said the next one mightn't have been so bad but I ddin't want to find out. it was like having morning sickness but without the pregnancy.

right, so little DD has a head to toe rash. she seems ok in herself. is very sleepy, but has been since birth. phoned for a dr appointment this morning, they told me 4PM!!! even when i explained that it's a newborn. (and then it was...oh well she's not in our system... YA THINK?? she's twelve effing days old FFS!) so i took the appt and also asked the gp to phone me. she did about 10 mintues later and told us to come right in.
to make a long story short she said it was baby rash, then said a long scary soundng name. but she said it's harmless though it may erupt a bit and look worse befpre it goes away. so i'm g;ad i went in just for peace of mind.

have to go change and feed her majesty.
oh! one question: if your baby sleeps well at night so you still get them up to change them?? this whole sleeping thing is new to me. (ds didn;t sleep well for almost 2 years)
she's got a sore bum so i#m trying to change her a lot but if she;s just wanting a little feed then going back to sleep it seems such a shame to get up to change her.

Nutty - am very very glad you are thinking abut holding off on the steralisation thing - I scarily know a lot of people that have had it in a variety of ages and TBH I have only ever witnessed negative effects from it both physically and emotionally - I also (sorry if I am being overly opinionated here) thin that you and DH are so young to be permanently snipped - what if you change your mind in 5 years time? It is completely up to you but I would go for something less permanent for the next few years and when you are both 100% sure then make it a bit more permanent - at that time, the male version is a lot less invasive.

my previous dr told me that basically the injection is the same as the pill but more permanent - in that it can't be taken out - so if you had no side effects with the pill should be great but if you suffer effect from the pill you are likely to with the injection but once it is in, there is little you can do.

My problem is I am not allowed estrogen (sp?)- so was on prog-only pill and apparently there isn't a p-only injection or implant (any ideas?) - hate condoms, tried the coil and had really bad reactions to it so can't have that so looks like I am back on the pill - not too fussed to be honest but can't go back on it until I have had at least one regular cycle and with bfing etc, tis unlikely to be for a good few months!

GInger YANBU - with all the best intentions in the world - that is just not what you want with a new baby - I know how hard it is to say anything too but you will have a lovely few days with V now to make up for the time you were overtaken!

Springy - it must be so hard (hugs) - he clearly didn't mean it when he said he didn't love you and is now trying to over-compensate! Maybe when things calm down a bit you can have a more rational chat and work out why he said all those things in the first place!

Schultes - That is so annoying - my MW did it to me once and I had to go to her to get Karahan checked out but then we all know how rubbish my local MW was! Really hope they come soon so you can get out in the sunshine!

Weather has been pants here but sun has just come out so am going to feed and change Kara and then go out for a walk - have managed to do just under half of the first coat of paint in the dining room and will finish that off when we get back!

Welcome back, Beth Don't feel daunted by the speed of our threads (although they're slower now we're all preoccupied!) - just jump in when you can

What a huge baby on only G&A! Glad that it was a positive experience for you despite that!

Know what you mean about the 3 week growth spurt - definitely an issue here as well. Again, I'm typing one-handed as he feeds

Welcome Bethdivine and congratulations!! Has DD got a name yet so we can add you to the baby list?

Duh - read properly Juw - add away Beth !!!

He left at 11 to do some uni work:

"It'll probably take about an hour."
"No rush, but keep in touch."
"Yeah, obviously."

Do you think I've heard from him?

BB - DepoProvera injectable contraceptive and Implanon implant are both progestogen only. Plus there is the Mirena device - coil which also releases progestogen, which might possibly suit better than standard coil. Sorry, no expertise in contraceptives, so no real advice beyond that!

Though can link to the official product data sheets if that would help.

Updated for BethDivine

The baby list...

12 Feb: Skiingone: MARIANNA 4lb 4oz
20 Feb: Glaskham: RUBY MARIE 4lb 3oz
04 Mar: Barbarella: ESTELLA, ROSANNA, OTIS
05 Mar: Kazkiss: ISABELLE FLORENCE 4lb 6oz & OLIVER THOMAS 3lb 7oz
15 Mar: Babypringle: OSCAR WILLIAM 7lb 2oz
28 Mar: Claireykitten: VIOLET ROSE 7lb 9oz
29 Mar: WhatFreshHell: FELIX DEVLIN ALEXANDER 10lb 5.5oz
31 Mar: Mumblemum: ORSON XERXES
02 Apr: Oddeyes: ELEANOR 9lb 8oz
03 Apr: Bleuravin: MEGAN LILLIAN CONSTANCE
03 Apr: Bumpalump: JACOB 8lb
04 Apr: BabyBolat: KARAHAN 6lb 5oz
05 Apr: Mrsfossil: ISLA LILIAN 7lb 10oz
06 Apr: BoffinMum: FELIX DAVID GORDON 7lb 9oz
11 Apr: SpringySunshine: GEORGE NATHAN 8lb 15oz
11 Apr: RachelinScotland: CLEMENT JAMES 8lb 14oz
11 Apr: Lou031205: ISLA SOPHIA 7lb 9oz
11 Apr: Electra: ISABELLA CAROLINE 6lb 3oz
11 Apr: AuldAlliance: ALEXANDRE 7lb 6oz
12 Apr: Phdlife: Name TBA GIRL 9lb 3oz
12 Apr: BethDivine: Name TBA GIRL 9lb 9oz
13 Apr: MathsMummy27: AMELIA CHARLOTTE
14 Apr: Purlease: ADAM 9lb 2oz
15 Apr: Juwesm: HUGO GEORGE 9lb 2oz
15 Apr: Bronze: ISAAC JOHN
15 Apr: Kalikaroo: Name TBA BOY 8lb
15 Apr: Minush: ZAFIRAH ROSA 7lb 12oz
15 Apr: FatandFedup: EMILIA ROSE 7lb 6oz
16 Apr: PuzzleRocks: HOLLY ELIZABETH 8lb
16 Apr: Brettgirl: HANNAH GRACE 6lb 15oz
16 Apr: ReallyTired: Name TBA GIRL
18 Apr: Staryeyed: Name TBA BOY 7lb 11oz
20 Apr: LuLuBai: SEBASTIAN 9lb
20 Apr: Swaliswan: BETH 7lb 9oz
21 Apr: Kittycatisgettingfat: GABRIELLA AUDREY BIANCA
21 Apr: B52s: SAM MARTIN 7lb 9oz
21 Apr: Schulte: HAZEL LOIS 7lb 9 oz
23 Apr: Tristaleejac: LEWIN 8lb 4oz
23 Apr: NuttyTaff: TIAHNA SKYE 8lb 8oz
23 Apr: Purplemonkeydishwasher: ISLA ELIZABETH 8lb 14oz
24 Apr: Soon2befamilyof4: TALIA 7lb 6oz
26 Apr: Carameli: THEO LAURENCE 7lb 6oz
26 Apr: Surprisenumber3: EVIE ANNE 8lb 2oz
26 Apr: Bicnod: OSCAR MATTHEW 8lb 1oz
27 Apr: Lauren61: OLIVER STEPHEN 7lb 7oz
27 Apr: Gingersarah: VERONICA ROISIN 9lb 1oz
30 Apr: MegBusset: ARCHIE 8lb 15oz
03 May: Conkertree: Name TBA BOY 8lbs 8oz

Still to hatch...

24 Apr: Frekkles:
25 Apr: TarteTatin:
27 Apr: Ilovesummer:
28 Apr: Satheresitting:

My Mom and Dad have just left, having been here since Sunday morning. Had a nice relaxed time - just sat around reading the papers, watching telly and having lots of long Hugo cuddles. Plus my Mom did lots of cooking and tea making, which was lovely. Gave DH a day or two off from doing it!

We've just bought a Samsonite pop-up travel cot. It is super-mahoosive (or bigger than I expected, anyway!)!!!

Am now just waiting for HV for another weigh-in.

Tum-ti-tum.

Also, he's having some sort of ridiculous mid-life crisis, despite only being 22. He left today wearing huge, clompy goth boots & his leather jacket (both of which haven't seen the light of day for a few months). Over his ripped jeans & big, slouchy top

I suppose he's probably just trying to reassert his individuality with his 'single man' clothes (I've never asked him to change his style!), but it just seems so stupid & it really grates with me on top of everything else. & I'm not even dressed yet because I can't put George down for long enough. I tried to have a poo earlier, but had to stop because he was getting so worked up & it's just not worth it. Of course, at that time, I thought that DH would be home very soon.

I know I'm whinging now. Sorry. I shall busy myself elsewhere for a while. I'm overly fragile today

Welcome back Beth, congrats on your baby daughter. Sounds like you did amazingly well.

Hello people. Not well today. ?Virus. Had a temperature in the night and have been generally struggling. DH has been very helpful but had to go to work. Kids convinced I have swine flu LOL. (Too much Newsround IMO).

Springy, like the others say, your man needs a handbook about what to do. The problem with dishing instructions out is that it seems controlling. But he clearly hasn't worked out the rules of engagement yet. Food is a number one must, for a start. He's blardly lucky he isn't a penguin, or else he would have to stand with an egg in his feet all day while you go out and about instead of him. Have you thought of threatening that?

Frekkles, sounds like latent labour to me, could go on for a few days yet but you are clearly on the way. It's nothing to do with your psychology blocking it, it's to do with the fact that your baby isn't cooked yet, you sausage you.

Nutty, there are two words for you, Mirena and Coil. I hate to put it like this, but if one of your kids were tragically to die, you might want another in spite of SPD tendencies, so don't do anything permanent. I'm not either, and I'm a lot older than you.

OK, back to sleep now, still feeling a bit shit.

PS, Nanny wanted £30k a year . Upon receipt of her CV, it transpired that far from having 6 years' experience as the agent indicated, she is in fact 21 (younger than my daughter), has two years' experience, and recently did a short distance learning course of about 6 weeks in home childcaring.

They have now sent us a CV of someone who wants £25k a year, who is the same age, and has only ever done a bit of playworker and nursery nurse temping, and again a very low level p/t distance learning course in childcare.

I despair. Many of our research assistants earn considerably less than this and they are in their 30s and have PhDs in child development etc. In another context, £30k is pretty much top of the classroom teachers' pay scale, for which you have to be a graduate with a postgraduate certificate in teaching, plus 4-6 years' experience. What is the world coming to???

I think I shall enlist Felix on my course for a mere £3000 a year, and then the other students can play with him during lectures.