Due July 2009 - Part 4 - The Third Trimester.

[Phoenix]

A new thread, the old one's almost full

July 09 List

25th June - Christiana - DC #2 - Surprise
28th June - Woollyjo - DC #2 - Having a girl
29th June - Welshlinz - DC #2
29th June - JLo2 - DC #4 - Having a boy
29th June - Highrise - first baby
early July - lyca - DC #4
1st July - Rattling - first two babies - Surprise - TWINS
1st July - binkerbeany - DC #2
1st July - Mrsmope - DC #2 and #3 - Having 1 boy, 1 girl - TWINS
1st July - trixiechick
2nd July - Nicky6 - DC #2
2nd July - pop1973
4th July - Mum2boys2girls - DC #5
4th July - ActivityApple - first baby - Having a boy
5th July - soozze - DC #2
6th July - xxhunnyxx - first baby - Having a boy
6th July - Wiltedrose - DC #2 - Having a girl
7th July - MuppetGirl - DC #3
7th July - Misspaella - DC #3 - Surprise
7th July - QueenFee - DC #3 - Surprise
7th July - thelollipoplady - DC #3 - Having a boy
7th July - Eviebear
8th July - JetLi - first baby
8th July - deleting - DC #3 - Surprise
8th July - rubyriley - DC #3 - Having a boy
9th July - LargeGlassofRed - DC #4 AND #5 - Having 2 boys - TWINS
9th July - Betsyboo - DC #3
9th July - London11 - DC #2 and #3 - Having 2 boys - TWINS
9th July - bellybaba
9th July - Gillyan - DC #2 - Having a girl
9th July - Hobbgoblin - DC #4
10th July - Baffy - DC #2
10th July - Mij - DC #2 - Surprise
10th July - Newb - first baby - Having a girl
10th July - SafferUpNorth - first baby
10th July - eveningall - DC #2
11th July - Marsmonster - DC #2
12th July - Jenny79 - first baby - Having a boy
13th July - Scully - DC #3
14th July - doublehelp - DC #3
14th July - Naturopath - DC #2
14th July - Dannyg - DC #3 - Having a girl
14th July - LittleDoe - first baby
15th July - Accebar - Having a girl
15th July - Lydiathetattooedlady - Having a boy
16th July - BeccaBump - DC #2 - Having a boy
16th July - Knax - DC #2
16th July - NattyTomAndEllen - DC #3
16th July - SheWillBeLoved - first baby
16th July - plot2 - DC #2 - Having a boy
16th July - Lillabet - first baby - Surprise
17th July - Patchybob - DC #3 - Surprise
17th July - Phoenix - DC #2 - Having a boy
17th July - alibobble - DC #2 - Surprise
17th July - Bozette - DC #2 - Having a girl
17th July - BrumOne - first baby
18th July - maxmissie
19th July - Dinkyboysmum - DC #2
19th July - busyemma - DC #3
20th July - LBK - first baby
20th July - Belgrano - DC #2 - Having a boy
22nd July - ray81
22nd July - chellebelle - DC#4
23rd July - Andie01 - DC #2
24th July - Madoldbird - DC #3 - TWINS
24th July - Lastboxoftampons - first baby
24th July - Moominmoma - first baby
24th July - Lyrebird - first baby
24th July - ilikeyoursleeves - DC #2
25th July - PrincessButtercup - DC #3 - Having a boy
25th July - BonzoDoodah - DC #2 - Surprise
25th July - Mickeylou - DC #2 - Having a girl
27th July - KitCat26 - first baby
28th July - mylilmiracle - first baby
28th July - Cheekycel - Having a girl
29th July - Brainmish - DC #2
29th July - Poppet45 - first baby
30th July - Mavornia - DC #2
31st July - madeinamerica - first baby - Having a girl
31st July - littlepipbumpmummy - DC #2
31st July - EarthMotherWannabe - first baby

Hi ladies

Totally grrr at the moment after my midwife/scan/diabetes/consultant meeting today .

Midwife - great, bp and wee fine,

Scan - great, all within normal size and placenta high and at the back,

Diabetes - great, all good levels and managing well,

Consultant - aaaargh!!! Didn't even see him, he sent his female colleague instead. Was a different guy to last time and he's basically written in my notes that he doesn't agree with a homebirth because of the possibility of a bigger baby leading to shoulder dystocia (baby getting stuck). He said that although the growth scans are fine they can be inaccurate so I'd be better off in hospital. I have to go back for another growth scan when I am 37+4 (what the hell is the point if he doesn't seem to believe in it anyway ???) and he will make a decision then as to whether or not to induce or to go naturally!

I am absolutely fuming as the consultant I saw last time told me that if everything was good this time around there was no reason not to have a homebirth! How can 2 people have such different ideas??

I feel totally let down as I have been trying so hard to get this homebirth, managing the diabetes, managing the SPD, and I still don't know where I'll be having this baby!

If they do decide to induce I may only have 3 days notice of going in as they usually do it at 38 weeks!!!

I am sure pregnant women are not supposed to be going through this sort of stress!!!

I spoke to my mw this afternoon and she has calmed me a bit, she's advised me to find out tomorrow who the consultant is at the next appointment and if it's the guy I saw today to request a different person and preferably the guy I saw last time. The problem is because he's written that he is against homebirth in my notes the mw's hands are tied until someone re-writes that I'm ok to go. I could go into labour at 37 weeks and still have to go to hospital because I haven't seen anyone who can overrule this guy!! If it had been the consultant I'd seen a few weeks ago I'd have taken it better as I'd have know he is pro-homebirth but looking out for my and baby's health. I just feel that this consultant is one of the 'let's make all ladies give birth in stirrups' brigade

I really feel like demanding an elective c-section just so I feel like I have some bit of my pregnancy in my control again!!

Sorry for the rant but I am so fed up now. I was crying coming out of the appointment in frustration.

I know this is pathetically trivial in comparison with others' troubles, but I've sprained my bloody ankle so dramatically I'm confined to the sofa and considering sending DP out to a chemist to see if they sell walking sticks so I can get to the sodding loo without needing more paracetemol. What marvelous timing grrr.

becca that sounds very upsetting, sorry to hear that. Some consultants still seem to have that old fashioned god-complex that all male doctors used to come with! And it's your choice, at the end of the day (not saying that you wouldn't take sound medical advice, but still...). Fingers crossed for getting the 'good' one next time.

The only consultant I've had to deal with in either pg didn't even look me in the eye, gave deep sighs all the way through the (3 minute) consultation and had one foot up on the desk throughout. And having been a pretend patient for registrars' exams (used to be an actor - I was resting ), I can confirm that lack of people skills is still pretty prevalent among even the most intelligent medics, although I have several mates who are in the profession, who all seem wonderful. Luck (or lack of it) of the draw who you get. Shite, isn't it.

MissP length of first, and any, feed is massively variable between babies. I suspect your DDs tongue tie was at the root of your sore nips problem as 45 mins isn't outside the normal range IME, although long/frequent exposure plus a less than ideal latch (as with TT) would certainly make you more vulnerable. It might help to build your confidence that it will be OK this time, if you can do a bit of revision on what a good latch 'should' feel/look like (or rather what it shouldn't feel like!), and make sure you have that tube of Lansinoh close at hand to fend off any soreness from the very beginning. And have BFC phone numbers in your labour stuff to get immediate help if you feel the latch isn't quite right. My DD used to feed for 45 mins each side until she was way over 6 months - that was normal for her. I know other babes who've only ever fed for 10 minutes either side. BTW, comfort sucking is 'normal' too and of course nipple stimulation helps get your supply established, so longer feeds can be good news too .

becca god you sound very annoyed - with every reason!

How far away from the hospital do you live? If u want a HB badly enough and u are happy then go for it. But I would only say that if you could transfer to hospital easy enough if things went wrong. Mind u I have no experience of shoulder getting stuck, if it happened again would it be safe to transfer to hospital? You should make another appoint with the consultant you like and demans some answers.

And no us preganant women should not go through so much stress getting all sorts of conflicting evidence off loads of different health care professionals.

Hope you're okay.

mij hope your ankle heals

Oh Becca what a stressful situation! Here's hoping u get to see the other consultant next time.

mij sorry about ur ankle hope ur not in too much pain. what are the chances I hurt my right ankle as well today!? And I don't even know how I managed to do it?! Came back from lunch with a painful ankle.

Gillyan how u doing today?

Phoenix no ur not the only one! DP is driving me crazy, and feel as if I'm the only adult in this relationship Dunno if it's just the fact that I'll be completely dependent on him financially for the next couple of months, and sometimes or most of the time I'm concerned that we won't cope. He tends to have a bit of the ostrich head in the sand mentality and I just feel stressed by it all arghhh!

Sorry for the me post. Hugs to everyone else xx

missp I can only echo what Mij has said - exactly what I was thinking. Great to know we are singing off the same hymn sheet so to speak! I would add to get the babies mouth checked ASAP as it tends to be genetic.

Becca I know exactly how you feel. The first consultant I saw was all for ealry induction then this last one just fobbed me off. I have now insisted thanks to my lovely midwife I see the consultant herself and not one of her registrars. Fingers crossed for you (and me!)
Had a bad day today. I fell asleep no less than 3 times on the sofa! Heard DD whispering to DS to stay quiet because mummy was sleeping bless However the rest of the day was full of tears and tantrums and lots of wet clothes so hard work. I did wonder by 8pm tonight how the heck I am going to cope with 3 especially afer all the 3rd time mums in the queue at toddlers were telling me no 3 is the last straw that breaks the camels back oh well too late to change my mind now!
On a more amusing note my DH is suddenly very good at having to work late / having a headache / not coming up to bed interesting when it's on the other foot!

Hi becca - that consultant sounds like a bloody disgrace and wants shooting with shit
I've said it before but they're all bloody OBSESSED with this diabetes thing and the 38 week induction lark at the moment. And its so true about the scans being inaccurate. With this attitude from the consultant, what exactly was the point of you "managing" the diabetes so well and working really hard at it, to then be basically told that there's no point in doing so and chances are you'll deliver a large baby anyway? Surely it's the same as saying you might as well have said stuff it to the diet and lived on chips, full-fat coke and strawberry mivvi's for the last 3 months and taken your chances. If you'd have had undiagnosed GD (and I'd have thought this was perfectly possible, even with the perpetual tiddle tests) then you'd be at greater risk of the shoulder dystocia, BUT you would have had no problems having/booking your homebirth - it makes no sense the other way around does it FFS?
Diet-wise at least, yourself and Phoenix have possibly had the healthiest pregnancies out of this whole thread, because of the GD and yet you're both being penalised. It really makes no sense to me

Oh and my MIL rang tonight and said "Have you still not had that baby yet??????"
Crazy bint - I've still another 5 weeks at least and she knows full well what my due date is as she expressly told me not to have the baby that day as it's DP's barmy Aunty's birthday and apparently that would be just unforgiveable of me. I really must get caller ID on this bloody home phone before July, so I can avoid all further nuisance calls.
A swig of Gaviscon anyone?? I must calm down. I must calm down. I must calm down.....

Message withdrawn

Morning all
Mij and Queenfee - thanks for the advice. I have myself armed with remedies in case I have yet another ropey start and I have mentioned checking for tongue tie in bold in my birth plan. Here's hoping this 3rd bf experience is a bit better than my last 2.

Mij is spraining your ankle your cheeky way of literally getting time to put your feet up?!

Queenfee we can console each other when our 3rd DC arrives. I still think it won't be much of a difference. I am already swimming in nappies, tantrums and mess.

Christiana do what you feel is best for you. I know plenty of women who have had CS (planned and unplanned) and the recovery has been ok for most. From what I gather, the key is getting help at home for the first few weeks after the procedure especially if you have another DC. Hope you get the consultant on your side.

Jetli your MIL sounds funny. I love the way you are not allowed to have the baby during certain events. It sounds a bit like my MIL, who albeit is lovely (most of the time), was annoyed at me the last time I went into labour as she was waiting for the gas man and we needed her to take DS. I guess you better not get the birth of her grandchild in the way of things.

Apple sorry to hear about your pains.

Hi the anyone I have missed.

Hi All

I'm joining the Gillyan camp having just spent the night in hospital.

Had my routine midwife appointment yesterday and had v. high ketones in urine plus small amount of blood so went in again to the day assessment unit. They did a trace and I was having Braxton Hicks every ten minutes with some serious contractions every half hour. Urine sample no. 2 was fine but the contractions not so good so they had me stay the night and be monitored again this morning. Still getting tightenings but cervix is closed so they let me go. Thank goodness!

I'm supposed to be having a weekend away this weekend with exdp but he has gone into panic mode and doesn't want to risk going so I am feeling glum. The midwife thinks I should go because it will be a nice rest. She phoned him and told him to chill out, so he is thinking about it.

Hunny, my advice would be to make the birth certificate thing a personal choice rather than a legal one. Effectively he has PR whatever as he is the father, the new law means this is automatic regardless of your relationship status.

As for the drinking, it seems he is alcohol dependent. Alcoholism is more complex than not being able to get through the day or morning or whatever without a drink. That is the popularised view of alcohol dependency but it has many guises. My exdp has issues with using alcohol as a solution to life stress. He is a professional businessman and is wealthy and successful. However, he has let me and this baby dowm hugely and I feel the same irrational sense of shame about that as you mention. It is very hard to not allow this to grind you down at times, I find.

Anyway, stay positive, you sound very confident and in control so I am sure all will be well for you however things turn out.

Best wishes everyone else too!

Morning everyone

QueenFee and anyone else expecting their 3rd - I heard the opposite; that it was going from 1 to 2 that's the biggest shock, after that it's just another head to count . Here's hoping!

And yes - it's good to know we have similar info on bfing

positioning I've no idea if it made any difference last time, but DP and I spent a couple of highly amusing evenings with a bag of frozen peas and a torch trying to get DD to turn (and she did at some point - no idea if on own accord or not). Allegedly, babe will move towards light and away from cold, so get on all fours, put torch down by pubic bone and peas on top of bump!

MissP a deliberate ankle sprain would have been far too clever a move for the state of my brain right now! I managed to find lots of sitting-down jobs to do, and then spent the night in the spare room so I could get more comfy. Can even walk up stairs this morning so loads better. Situation was so dire last night cos I walked around town for a couple of hours on a sprained ankle, so as soon as I put it up for half an hour it seized up completely. It's the ankle I damaged badly a couple of times when I was a teenage dancer, and is now so loose it just springs back most of the time, so didn't think anything of it. Pain? What pain..?

Hiya

I'm feeling very frustrated!!!! Been up since 5am and having contractions since 6am. They have been coming every 4/5 mins. Started having them last night too and it started the same again with the back ache and period pains and then they were coming every 5 mins but drifted off to 8mins. Fell asleep on the sofa so went up to bed. Had a terrible nights sleep cos of my hips.

I am supposed to phone the hospital at the slightest twinge but I just cannot bare having to go in again. From 6am - 9am they were every 4/5 mins so I tried lying down as this can make them go off, they reduced in frequency but got stronger so at 10.30 I got up. Decided to go and have a shower and wash my hair etc, could still feel them when I was moving about but you just don't concentrate on them as much. They are not painful apart from the odd little twinge, more like period pain/ache.

I am now thinking I'll dry my hair and get dressed and just see how things go, if they get and stronger or come closely together I'll go to hospital to see if I am actually dilating. Do you think I'm being silly not going now?

Having had a baby before I know this is nothing really and it's just my body threatening to go into early labour. I just can't imagine that my cervix is anything but closed as I'm not having any pain. I live 5 mins away from the hospital anyway and I am seeing the consultant tomoorow at 9am for my pre-op assesment for the c/s.

I am just so tired and getting fed up of all these contractions, although they are not painful they are uncomfortable and take my breath away, I'm exhausted.

hobgoblin hope you are okay and glad you are home

christiana - some comfort ... although I would never ever chose one the CS wasn't as bad as I' dreaded (after all my reading and NCT classes and longing for a waterbirth). I was very lucky and healed well after the op and was out and about long before a lot of my friends who had a CS the same week. They had infections and other ailments. I did have one trouble - in that I am allergic to micropore tape and the plaster they stick the CS together with has the same glue!!! So I came out in a whole body itching rash for 2 weeks. Hideous! But the CS itself was fine and quite a pleasant experience. DD was born to the sound of Mr Blue Sky by ELO ("hey there pretty face, welcome to the human race..." ). It IS hard the first few days - feeling like you're split open and not being able to stand up and not being able to pick the baby out of the crib until the next day. But overall - after all my fears it really wasn't that bad.
And anyway - after my DD was born and I realised what an enormous head she had - I was really glad that I hadn't had to push her out and then walk like John Wayne for the next year

Beccabump - do you know that they can't force you to do anything you don't want medically? They can't "decide" to induce you - you MUST give consent. You can wait until you are 43 weeks if that's what you want. Any medical decisions must be made and agreed with by you and even if the hospital staff completely disagree with you - it is still your right to make those decisions. Even if it will harm the baby - mad I know - but they only have rights on what happens to the baby once it is born - until then it is part of you and you have control. So the key thing to ask, if medical staff want to do something and you don't ... ask ...
What is the risk if I don't do this?
What is the risk if I wait x days or hours or whatever?
How does the risk of doing this compare with the risk of doing nothing?
Sometimes there is no real medical reason to do things at a certain time - they just want to hurry you along, or it is the way things are always done. So for your sanity - ask them why they want to do anything and then make the decision yourself.

My bump feels really hard and little Dumpling is wriggling happily all morning. I think it has bruised me with a knee - feeling very tender in one spot. I spent the weekend in London walking about and meeting people and sightseeing - Waaaaay too much - am shattered and bump-stretched now... Just want to lie down and sleep.

Oh and I noticed a weird thing with my bump yesterday .... as I walk (and look down) the bump sways from side to side!!! It's mad!

Good Luck to Gillyan and hobgoblin with your scares ... fingers crossed they stay in for a while longer!

gillyan cross posted with you! Eeek to the contractions. What happens if your cervix is dilating? Are you going to have the baby now or are you going to get more drugs to try adn keep it in for a bit? If you're going to have the baby now anyway - then do as you feel and stay at home til you are ready. Otherwise it may be wise to at least phone the hospital and tell them what's happening. fingers crossed for you.

gillyan and hobgoblin keeping everything crossed for both of you. It's such a shite time to be kept awake by anything, just when you need your rest the most!

Because I didn't really notice/accept I was going into labour last time, I'm a bit twitchy that I might do the same thing again, except I know with second ones it's often faster. Have been getting lots of tightenings, BH and period pain cramps too, so keeping my fingers crossed this one isn't in a hurry.

activity yes I get the clicking! Weird isn't it!

I don't hear clicking, but I feel it when this child kind of shoves my ribs and what I'm guessing is a foot pings over them. Ouch!

Activity I did every barmy thing in the book to turn DD - even laid head-down on an ironing board propped on the sofa. Very uncomfortable, even while watching Dr Who... Lets hope your LO stays that way! Mine is still changing position a lot, but seems to remain approximately head down - I can tell because of where the hiccups are resonating!

Just had a quick catch up (putting off hoovering the lounge) but GOT to hoover & shower before 6pm!

Wanted to say Gillyan hope you're ok; it gets to the point when you think life has to go on, and to completely rest won't necessarily help anyway. So, guessing your LO will make an appearance before 40 weeks, but just remember EVERY day makes a big difference and, even if she arrives now, she'll be healthy and well, with a little extra help. Que sera sera (sp?) re actual D day!

hobgoblin Hope your LO holds out for a little longer for you too. I had the mother of all BH yesterday which seemed to last 15 mins solid and, as driving at the time, felt most uncomfortable/painful! Hurt to drive over bumps too and belly tender to touch afterwards. No other symptoms (i.e. discharge) but seems to me that there's a common theme here; that we're all getting very close to having our babies. Yep, at some point our pregnancies ARE going to end!!!

Off to hoover..........

christiana re c sections I have never had one my mother however had an op , 3 c sections and a hysterectomy and has never had any problems. If she was on here she would say to go for it for the simple reason that my brother is midly damaged as a result of a too long labour/stress in labour because he was big and what matters at the end of it all is not how they come but that both the mom and baby are well I suppose. Not wanting to scare anyone but thought it might help put it in perspective x I should go on to say he does lead a normal life and is a qualified accountant so not the end of the world either but it has changed things for him over the years.

Good luck Gillyan and hobgoblin I think by this stage if they want to come they will. I was born at 36 weeks after trying to get out for months weighing a healthy 7lb 13!

Off to sort out a million things for tomorrow, DD has school trip I have consultant appointment and I have to arrange childcare etc for DS oh the joys
I am feeling really well again and am glad and everyone is commenting on how well I look

Anyone know how to get the baby to engage once it is in the right position? Mine never seem to and I'm sure it helps if they are for a while before IYSWIM

hobgoblin glad to hear baby is staying put for now, looks like it aint gonna be long before somebody pops round here tho!
I didn't realise u were in the same boat as me, aren't men bastards eh? lol. Makes me feel a bit better that I'm not the only one who's been let down, sometimes I feel like ''why do other guys stick by their women? why me?'' but really I know that it's nothin to do with me, it's him who's got the problems and it's him who's gonna miss out on so much.

queenfee I'm no expert since I'm a first timer but the physio at our parent craft classes said rocking ur pelvis against a wall or swivelling on a gym/birthing ball can help baby move down. My baby's head is almost engaged so I've been doin these things to try and get him to move down, I'll let u know if it works.

Anyone else starving all the time at the mo? I'm eating far too much at the mo, I'm hungry half an hour after havin a meal, it's rediculous! I'm also really tired, I had a decent sleep last night n then a morning and an afternoon nap today. This aint a pre-labour sign is it? Didn't know whether it's my body's way of storing energy!
Still waiting for the nesting instincts to really kick in tho!

Morning everyone - oh yes i am starving too! (she says as she eats a bag of thorntons special toffee at her desk! )

i feel like this baby is lying across me, whereas DS was all feet poking in my ribs. i have a big space between my boobs and my bump which didnt happen last time until right at the end. mw said its because my abdominal muscles are damaged so my tummy just hasnt got the strength to hold the baby up. cant say as i mind not getting kicked in the ribs tho! really could live without the braxton hicks and frequent head buts to the fango tho!

i woke up last night with the most awful cramp in my calf. ouch - it took ages to go and DH shit himself cos he said i made so much noise he thought i was in labour.

honey so glad you are feeling better about it all. like you say its his loss.

i was putting my DS to bed last night and he said "night night my beautiful mummy." why on earth do such gorgeous little things have to turn into men!!!

by the way - clicking? thats is weird!!

lol at Mickylou ... with you on the starving all the blinkin time .... I'd eat my own leg some mornings.

I had the same leg cramps last night/ this morning. I scared the crap out of my hubby by squeaking out loud then doing a sideways commando roll out of bed ... crashing onto the floor and then jumping upright and hopping round the room.

With you on the feeling hungry and it makes it 100 rimes worse cos i can't just snack on any old crap from the fridge cos of the GD. I don't think i'm meant to snack full stop but i have to . No matter how big my meals are i'm starving before the next.

I'm seeing the consultant this afternoon. Good luck to everyone else who is too

Gillyan and hobgoblin hope your LO's are behaving and staying put .