Due May 2009 We're Nesting and Napping, Squeezing and Holding

[FiKelly]

here we go

me again, my pregnant lady brain is on the blink and i cant remember, but does someone on here do crochet (sp?)!? rgh sorry spelling has gone to pot too!

i'd really like to make a blanket for this bubba, but don't know where to start so need some pointers lol! Anybody??

chocbunnies fi can help you I think.

Yay I got £400!

Glad you've got some money, Looby - your situation sounds tricky to say the least.

Haven't caught up with everything. Just saw chocbunnies post about crochet and wanted to say there are some really good tutorials on YouTube. I'm crocheting a blanket but I'm not that experienced. It's a lot easier than you'd imagine though. I didn't do it for about 18 years then went on a workshop one day the other month and was pleased with how soon I picked it up again. x

afternoon all. glorious day here. hope you're all well. looby, good you got something, it's a start. I agree with the others' advice on making sure you get your £ before mat leave. he is so, so, so lucky you come into work at all.

i had my NCT one to one the other day. It's not cheap (£85 for 2 hours but I get reimbursed as am an employee) but was worth it. The teacher came to our house and was very personable, making us feel comfortable discussing labour, etc. talked about last experience and how we can avoid same, relaxation, pain relief, role of partner, birth plan, massage... a lot covered. she's even going to put us in touch with head MW at hospital so we can go in to discuss dd2's birth (what went badly) and get reassurance for better care this time.

most important, DH and I are now feeling a lot more confident about this birth coming, that we're more prepared than dd2's birth. i think I can handle this !

also getting more broody for LO to arrive - anyone else?

chocbunnies belgian is right i'm the crochet nut if you have a look at my blog you'll find a link to some beginner how to videos of the various stitches etc (right hand side column scroll down page a bit). If you have an idea of what you fancy doing i can track down some free online patterns too...

off to start making dinner for us all... will be back on later

sausagenmash - I'm having my spa day at the Killyhevlin Hotel, Co Fermanagh, N Ireland!!

Looby - I think I'd've told 'the bosses girlfriend' that I was going to speak to my solicitor about my back pay status. You really need to get this sorted out. Have you tried contacting your MP/councellor??? What about lodging a small claims through the courts?? Would this work? Has anyone else in your work been paid, or is everyone in the same boat? I'd find this very very frustrating - who do you go to to get YOUR money you've EARNED and are ENTITLED TO?????

chocolate bunnies - I've been gettin very painful ?BH over the past few days, as well as (my own diagnosis) stretchy ligaments at either side of bump (more so on right side), bits of bump stabbing me, and a very painful pubic bone. Rolling over in bed is now sore too on my pubic bone - you should hear to groans of me . Apart from the spd pains I dont recall having the BH or ligament pains with #1... maybe I'm doing too much.

looby - glad you got something, but what is it for? How much more do they owe you - ie is the £400 this weeks pay and they still owe you £3k????

momino - I am getting very broody too!! Bbut very tired also. My house is such a mess and I've no energy after 3pm to tackle anything. I was at our shop this morning from about 10:30 (after doing a top up shop at Tescos) until 1:30pm pricing skateboard stuff, and even that knackered me... DH is probably working late tonight, so it is my AIM to get to bed when putting ds to bed. TBH I could go right now... though will prob put feet up on sofa and supervise ds playing Wii.

OH I've just rememebered, I bought a twin pack snicker bar - one for ds and one for ME!!!

do you want a laugh??? found this on mn

hope it doesnt offend anyone...

Looby this is from the www.direct.gov.uk website, and it sets out what you need to do in your situation:

If you haven't received your full pay (or any pay) try these simple steps:
Check your payslip to see if it tells you why you haven't been fully paid
Check your contract to see if there is anything that allows your employer to make deductions from your pay
Speak to your employer to see if you can sort the problem out with them
If you have an employee representative (for example, a trade union official) you can ask for their help.
If this doesn't work, you have the right to go to an Employment Tribunal to get your money. You can also try and reclaim money you've lost (including the extra losses caused by you not receiving the money on time, for example, bank charges) by making a breach of contract claim.

Your first step, then, is to formally write to your boss (not his girlfriend) setting out what you are owed and when you expect to be paid, and how. If you don't get your pay by this date your next step is to submit an employment tribunal claim. If you check your house insurance you are probably covered for employment related legal expenses, and I would strongly encourage you to seek advice from an employment lawyer in making your tribunal claim. The ET will find in your favour and demand that he pays up.

It might be less stressful for you to wait until you start your maternity leave before making the claim, but you need to act fast as there is probably a time limit for making the claim.

Oh, and you probably know, but you are entitled to reasonable time-off for ante-natal care, so I hope they haven't told you to take annual leave.

I need to go and make ds his tea - he wants sausages and crusty bread... i just don't have the energy... anyone else feel they're dragging themselves around in the evenings?? Tomorrow from 6:30pm - 9pm is the official launch of our shop - I'll be lying asleep in the corner Just wake me up when it's time to go home!! lol.

Ilareggub - that's a great site you found for Looby. I wasn't sugesting Looby spoke to the bosses girlfriend about her situ, although I'd've loved to have seen her face, cos she's bound to know what's going on there...!

divedaisy, I didn't think you were! I've got an impression of the girlfriend and her previous comments to Looby and it isn't a favourable impression!

Have fun at the launch, hope it goes well.

I'm exhausted, so tired! DS had a very bad night and I ended up in his bed. We met friends in the park this morning and had a lovely time in the sunshine. We all forgot about the time, it was so sunny and nice, and as I got back to the car there was a traffic warden in the process of ticketing me, oops! Obviously I exaggerated my pregnant waddle, and looked pained and uncomfortable and gave him my bestest smile...and he let me off!

Hi, haven't caught up yet but just saw Looby's news about GD - can totally understand how scary it must be to be told this but you'll do well, I'm sure, your baby will be fine and you'll be looked after and supported. Lareggub you seem to deal with it really intelligently and make it sound almost like its not an issue, I'm so impressed. Don't give yourself a hard time about it Looby - you'll be just fine.

And oh my god, your mothers Llare and Looby

Okay I'm still on page 32. Oh boy. I'm about to show what a horrible person I really am...

Looby. I know things are a bit rough for you right now, but personally I think you could do with a bit of tough love re the pay situation. Its awful to continually read that you still go there to work and that in spite of all the truly good advice on here from people who really know their stuff and cared enough to give you their professional, no less, advice, which you have completely ignored, that you are still apparently taking the passive approach and just hoping and waiting for them to pay you. This is what I think - somewhat unsolicited, and although I'm clever - wheres that winky - I'm certainly no professional in this regard - I think you will not see a penny from those cock suckers without demanding it. End of. Sorry for being such a bully, I know it must be so very stressful to be in that position. I just really want you to be paid up fair and square. Please please please give us some good news about this, its in your hands.

Oh no - Looby I'm really sorry, my last post makes it sound like in my first post I was comparing you to Llareggub and that I think you're being unreasonable to be sad and worried about the GD - thats not what it was meant to read like at all. I do admire how Llareggub gets by, and I meant it to sound reassuring in that there is good support that you will get for this and that you'll get through it. I would so cry and rant if I'd been diagnosed with GD (or not been paid!) so I just wanted to assure you that I totally support you, it just sounded all wrong when I finally read it all just now. Its my bull in a china shop syndrome. Oh dear.

Ilareggub - you must have an amazing memory! To remember so much about his girlfriend from such a time ago - I have problems remembering what I read on the last page!

I cannot recall what steps Looby has taken to get her money Polony, but I am sure she has approached this subject with her boss regularly. And I don't agree with you when you say she's 'completely ignored' all the professional advice on here. I do recall (!!) some time ago Looby being advised to put it in writing to her boss - and from what I recall she did do that. I think she was guided to a letter to copy, or something like that... not everyone has the balls to walk into their boss's office and shout the odds and demand their pay - I doubt I would be able to without someone being there with me for moral support.

Which makes me think Looby - is there anyone else in your not-been-paid situation in work? Why not get all together and walk in and do your demands and support each other?
I do share Polony's fears too that you may not get the money owed to you and the longer you do wait for it the more your boss is getting from you and the less chance you have of getting anything off him in return.

Hi Polony, I don't think you sound like a bull in china shop at all - just wanted to reassure you cos I often worry about comments I've made!!

Sorry to hear about the GD... Some of you are really suffering, it can't be easy at all.

xx

I totally agree with the worries that if Looby doesn't take any more serious steps soon, like the steps llareggub suggested, she might loose her money all together. If the company is in financial trouble then it will only be to the boss' advantage to ignore looby's demands for her back pay. Looby definitely get some legal advise before it's too late. Hope you'll get it sorted soon.

Don't worry about your comments Polony. I don't think I'd be any good at challenging my employer without a whole army of supporters with me. It must be very scary. I do remember Looby has talked to her boss and reminded him several times, with no success.

divedaisy my memory is pretty patchy to be honest. I have a good memory for the written word but not so great and visual or oral information. Besides, I remember a fair bit about Looby's situation because I work in HR and am pretty shocked that her employer thinks he can get away with this.

I know I've said it before Looby, but I don't want you to think that I wasn't upset about having GD. I really, really was. But I was diagnosed ages ago so have had plenty of time to get my head around it and start dealing with it. I also have polycystic ovarian syndrome, so knew I was more likely to get GD so was prepared really.

After all that stuff with my mother last night, I've just had a lovely long chat with my step-mother of 2 years, and she said goodbye with a cheery "love you" which made me feel great. Bless her!

I'm off to sort out the kitchen now. Looby, I've bought a great ice-cream from Sainsburys which is fairly low in sugar and is low enough to be acceptable on a diabetic diet. It is also very yummy and really satisfies my sweet tooth. It is a Cornish clotted cream ice-cream, and if you want the exact details I'll post them here.

Hi all

Too much catching up to do (plus I started an AIBU thread about feeding my kids chicken dippers so have that to nurture).

So, what I can remember - ladies with GD, I'm so sorry, how awful but it can go away after birth, yes?

Polony - sorry but you made me smile with your thoughts of stabbing, don't blame you!

Looby - your boss is a twat.

Ladies not yet on Mat Leave - for you, but I was forced into going on mine and am struggling to adjust to being SAHM after being full-time working mum for so long. When did my DD's become such stroppy madams?

Blotted - hello again on this thread this time!!

Who mentioned a pedicure? I realised today that I have incredibly hairy toes, we are talking long, curling toe-hair. Eeeeeew

And as for BH's, oh my goodness! They take my breath away.

And on a TMI note - DH and I had been 'cuddling' the other night and it set LO off on a massive kicking fit. It made DH laugh so much, lucky for me - I've heard of DP's/DH's refusing to have sex whilst their OH is pregnant because it's too weird and whatnot.

Happy weekend everyone - both my DDs have had on-off D&V this week, hoping for fine weather so I can get their weedy arses outside and into the fresh air.

A glass of red wine awaits, with a takeaway pizza too. Mmmmmm.

The thing is I think the last thing Looby needs to do is confront her boss verbally - I'd be unlikely to handle that very well either - but the advice concerning her rights and the links to the right agencies have been offered several times in the past along with the steps that someone in that position can follow - steps that are there precisely to protect us as well as to provide the support needed when dealing with an intimidating and difficult employer who has gone beyond overstepping the boundaries. I don't think I'd feel any more confident than anyone else in this situation, but no matter how awful I felt about dealing with it i know that sitting on the problem would only make it much worse. As bitter a thing it is to have to do, like having a tooth pulled, I'd sooner get it over and done with than have it fester.

grumpy- I just checked out your AIBU thread- I give DD and DS either chicken dippers or fishfingers, potato and beans/peas once or twice a week .

I am hoping that once DD goes to school she will expand her tastes due to peer pressure, but she is at nursery already and still doesnt eat some things. For example, i asked what lunch was today and she said "chilli and rice" which impressed me as she wont eat it at home, but then she said she only ate the rice...

Her favourite meals are spaghetti hoops, beans, jacket potatoes (without the jacket!), tuna and rice, cheesy pasta, sausages, and spaghetti bolognese (as long as there's no onions or lumps of tomato). Can't get her to eat eggs of any kind, and she doesnt like much meat/fish. She eats lots of fruit and some veg which balances some of it out... Some of those women on your AIBU thread would no doubt think i was a terrible mum (I dont feel great about it). We have had spells where we put a lot of pressure on to try new foods, but i just dont have the energy at the moment.

If anyone has any non-stressful ways of encouraging a more varied diet, or any good ideas for meals that might appeal to my DD based on her tastes above, I would appreciate it!

ice cream sound nice llare

Have had a call from the hospital, they've booked me an appointment with a new consultant and a doctor who specialises in GD. My appointment is not for 2 weeks tho, I am a bit worried about what to do about my diet till then any advice is welcomed.

I promise not to moan about money so much