Due April 2009: Episode 16 - BB's magical cervix dust prevents birthing. But Barbarellys Babies are here !

[SmuttyNuttyTaff]

here, that was close

Oh dear...What if I don't know if I want gas and air? Or what 'kit' I might want? Or if my baby should have vitamin K injections...Oops now I'm crying because I don't know! Silly preggy Bleu's hormones all over...better go get the mop...

DH home from work and full of a cold, in need of tea and sympathy. AIBU to feel 'Yes, you've got a cold, but I am PREGNANT!!!'???

Actually 2 of my closest friends did rock up at the hospital the day I gave birth and I was really pleased to see them. Was dying for a shower and to brush my teeth but didn't feel safe leaving DD. All sorts of strange people wandering in and out of the ward - thought she might get stolen! And bizarelly there was nowhere to put a baby in the bathrooms on the ward.

When friends arrived laden with gifts, flowers, champagne etc etc etc I handed DD over, grabbed my washbag and ran!

Luckily DH only has one ex girlfriend and she lives in Italy, his HUGE family makes up for this in the pain in the arse stakes though! Apparently they're all planning on coming for a holiday when the babies born.
Consecutively, not all at once, but still, in a one bed apartment.
One of the drawbacks of living in a sunny climate near the sea

Juwesm
NO YANBU !

Pregnancy takes precedent over man flu every time

You'll want G&A available, but just cos its there doesn't mean you have to have it. Mine says that for pain relief I would like to use movement, massage, G&A, TENS, water etc. Basically everything except pethidine (which cannot have for home birth anyway here). Also says that I am open to epidural but would like to be encouraged to keep going without.

Vit K - can be given orally as well, though IM preferred. I shall discuss this next week with MW. I wonder whether I can't just ramp up the brocolli and savoy cabbage intake for the next few weeks!

Bleu, don't worry! There's loads of time left & we're here to help

For gas & air, I think most people would suggest that it's good to have it - you may not find that it helps you much, but it's worth a go & it doesn't really count as drugs in the same way as pethidine or epidurals do.

I think Vitamin K is given as standard unless you ask them not to. I think (& I'm not sure on this!) it's because sometimes (very rarely) babies can have bleeding in their brains if they have a Vit K deficiency. I've heard debates about whether it's necessary to inject your baby with it / whether it causes bad side effects, but I don't know about that & you'll have to research it yourself if you feel it necessary, as nobody can weigh up the pros & cons for you. But as I say, I think it's given unless you specifically request that it isn't.

Oh Bleu - I didn't mean to make you cry.

Gas & air is piped into the room. You can try it if you like and just stop taking it if it makes you feel yucky. It's really not a big deal.

Don't worry about birthing ball. You can lean over any furniture in the room. You may find you need to rearrange things to suit yourself anyway.

I hauled all the bedding onto the floor so that I could parade around on all floors mooing or whatever it was I did (I really was in a different world).

Vitamin K - have a google and see what you think.

Lulu - were you hypnobirthing/ visualising or anything of this ilk? Or did your mind kind of automatically close in? Shutting out the outside world sounds like a useful way of dealing with everything, but I don't think my brain has the discipline to learn it.

Is anyone else doing any hypno stuff? One of the girls at NCT is, and it seems very interesting, but even when we do a quick 5 minute 'go to your happy place' exercise, I'm just thinking about what to have for dinner etc.

i've got a birth plan template bleu, if you want me to email it to you?

Juw, thinking about what to have for dinner is my happy place

I have a question Were/are any of your DH/DPs reluctant about being present at the birth? If so what did you do about it?

my mom did lamaze for her births (well 3 of the 4 i think) so i borrowed her books and tapes. but in the end i was shit at it. i could focus on anything other than the fact that it HURRRRRRTTTTTTTTT!

as for visitors...i haven't talked to DH about this really, but I am going to be ruthless this time. with DS MIL and BIL were over every effing night and during the day as well. and MIL is a very 'oh he's not hungry he's just excercising his lungs' type person.

this time of course we already have DS and he goes to bed early so evenings have been off limits for a while, hopefully that'll continue after the birth. it was just too much having people around all the time. (which is why i told my parents not to come until a couple weeks after the baby is born)

also i want DS to come to the hospital to meet his new brother or sister. but i don't want MIL to be there when that happens. i suspect that's going to be a fight!

Right. I want to try everything I can have access to then and when it comes to pain relief the last resort being 'drugs' like an epidural and pethidine...

No bother about the crying... I've stopped again. I've been VERY emotional lately again and have been having hot flashes which the MW says is hormonal... Dh looking for contracts, me making webpages, being away from Mom and sisters, constant visitors and things to do on my b4bb list when I'm not sleeping and baby constantly kicking and bouncing on cervix means I cry all the time lately...

frosty - can you email it to me as well? purplemonkey22 at hotmail.com

tell me about it bleu. i'm constantly bursting into tears the last week or so. feel a bit crazy really.

what can be the evolutionary benefit in pregnancy turning you into a blubbering wreck?

I've looked for templates online...but there's just so much that I don't know how to fill out really...I'm open to anything and everything really.

bleu - i'm the same. DH thinks i'm mental (but what else is new??)

lol so glad I'm not the only one floating down a river of tears

Ju - for me that is just what happened. They do say that some women go into themselves and I did. It was a bit like a hypnotic trance I guess. I think it really helped. I just followed my body and my instincts and pretty much blanked out everything that didn't seem important. Just focussed on each contraction and breathing my way through it.

It did help when one midwife popped in and reminded me to breath more slowly. I had been going like a train and the slower breathing really helped cope with the pain and seemed to help me get into a more trance like state. The midwives seemed to think I was very much in control of things. It was 4 hours before they offered me gas & air! (God I was glad when they did give it to me!)

I ask because my DH reacted with horror when he realised i expected him to be present. In fact his immediate reaction was 'I'll ask my mother to go with you' I was very and at this; Think I have managed to explain, politely of course, that pretty much the last person I want to see at my hospital bedside is the MIL.
DH has since said he'll come with me, but, but, but every time I try and discuss the birth with him, he goes into lock down mode. Slightly concerned that he'll flake out.
He is not an arse BTW, he just has a thing about hospitals and illness, tea and sympathy are not amongst his strong points!

this looks good! maybe better than the template i have, which is from my hospital

How do you all post so quickly? it takes me forever to write anything, and that's before I even get into the smileys, links and italics palavar

Oh Purple - I totally sympathise. I don't want anyone there either. Least of all my MIL.

My MIL kept picking DD up and walking off with her and putting her fingers in DDs mouth (maddening not just because I was trying to establish breastfeeding but also because she has a smelly dog and doesn't wash her hands very often - even after grooming him or sorting out his food etc).

I need to have a calm conversation with DH some time soon about things I don't want repeated this time around.

Springy - That's where I've been going wrong!

Bleu - have you been to antenatal classes? I found our NCT teacher very helpful when discussing birth plans, in addition to all sorts of stuff about pain relief, labour positions etc that I would never have dreamed of on my own. She also has loads of videos and books to borrow, though I haven't plucked up the nerve to watch the vid just yet.

Why do they feel the need to bounce on ones cervix? It is very disconcerting!

I thought antenatal classes were all about the Lamaze breathing stuff, like you see ont' telly. They have got some really good policy documents on the lamaze website though, all about woman's innate ability to give birth without the need for intervention. And I love the Lamaze range of toys! I want Jacques the Peacock!

My DH seems to have been fine about attending the birth all the way along. I never even considered that he might not be happy with it, and he hasn't mentioned anything. There are lots of newish dads in his team at work, and they all advised him to stay at the head end, and he seems happy with this!