Due April 2009 - Tralalaboomdiay, our bumps grow every day!!

[BabyBolat]

Place your bets on how long this thread will last, my guess is two weeks!!

I agree... frunpy needs to be explained better. Sometimes one's not up to having sex, or sometimes one would be if one was made to feel beautiful and desirable. Perhaps a good long discussion on the matter is in order.
If feeling shy about talking about such things is an issue, sometimes DH and I have conversations in the dark so we don't have to see each other...usually the lights get turned on at some point and we end up snuggling up next to each other having a real heart to heart. It's just those initial words which make us embarrassed or uncertain and can't get out while looking at each other... You might find such a thing useful.

To be honest I think its probably all to do with sex as with most men he would be quite happy for us to be at ait all day everyday but at the minute its just beyond me.

I am in absolute agony with my back and hips and pelvis obviously nothing like Nutty and others but to me its agony IYKWIM its the worst pain Ive ever experienced which kinda puts me off anyway but on top of that I have had really bad and constant thrush since about 8-10 weeks. As I keep telling him he has already had more this pregnancy than he got last time and unfortunately when he starts showing an interest I am generally covered in creams or in agony so I dont think I am being unreasonable.

In answer to your question Nutty my legs would be horrendous in a 2 inch skirt and he would shout at me for the heels at the minute but the low cut top would definitely get a thumbs up and so would the kinkyness.

Well Clairey perhaps you could tell your DH to vomit for three months solid, walk on swollen ankles and spend a night being kicked from the inside out and then he can comment on being frumpy!

Quick question - do you feel frumpy in yourself? If not then he can bopp off!!

I agree tho - frumpy is such a ridiculous comment to make - so ambiguous! Don't feel down tho, agree he was probably just annoyed and took it out on you! (not that that is at ALL justified - although when I do it to DH, it is!!!)

Bleur. That would probably be a fantastic idea all though I still cant see me managing it but that would involve him actually getting off his computer and coming to bed!

In some ways his comments are probably fair in that I was a completely different person re our sex life until we got married and fro some reason something clicked and it all became wrong and dirty.

Im really sorry I never intended to start talking like this but it just seems to have opened the floodgates now and I cant stop so I can now add snotty and tearstained to the frumpyness he will come home to.

Im probably making myself feel worse because I had decided I was going to make an effort today and make sure I was all made up and dressed and looking nicwe and I was going to tidy the living room and get tea on for when he came home etc etc and its just gone down the pan as I feel really rough and have ended up falling asleep on the sofa with ds instead so nothing is done and I just dont feel up to it now.

Yeah... the sex issue. I have to say that it's come up at our house too especially in the early months. I think he thought great she's preganant now we'll get to bang every other day 4 weeks a month... I guess maybe I thought to too in all honesty... but then I was feeling so ill. I can really empathize with you there.
We had a talk about it- with me crying a lot. And we discussed what options we had to solve the problem and what we'd be willing to do. We reached an understanding in the end. I will tell you in complete confidence that DH said that he was feeling like maybe I felt he was a bit undesirable himself and that was why we weren't being intimate...
I think we're going to have to have a talk again though because with the bump being so big it's become an issue again...I was actually thinking of broaching it this evening because I'm feeling fairly 'stable' emotionally and will be less likely to feel like I'm making a fool of myself.

Clairey, forget dinner, run yourself a bath and order a nice takeaway, put DS to bed early and have a nice night with DH. Tell him, if you are making the effort, then he has to put his computer down and make the effort too.

Why do you feel funny about sex - mine and DH sex life definitely changed after we got married but still a really lovely but different part of our relationship - but what is it exactly that is making you feel funny about it?

Clairey, you have to get it all off your chest - the worst thing in the world you can do is bottle it up xx

Also re sex and pregnancy - DH does not get anywhere near what he would like to get but let me say he is lucky to get what he does!!

Yes being ill and the discomfort of thrush does not make one feel like intimacy...and there's no reason to feel obligated no matter. Surely as open a talk as possible would be good to help explain such things...Ask him if he'd feel like sex with jock itch and football injuries...

Well just to make me cry even more a fantastic friend who moved to Australia the week after ds was born has just phoned me for the first time since she left and has made me cry even more telling me how wonderful and marvellous I am. This is after I hung up on her the first time she rang because when I answered the phone she said "who is this" and I presumed that anyone who knew me would know who they were calling so I presumed it was someone selling me something (we get ALOT of them) and just hung up on her!!!

See everyone thinks so! It'll all work out.

Trying to post using my smartphone so don't know whether it will work. Don't feel bad Clairey, he's being silly and should have a wank if it bothers him so much. He got you in this situation so he needs to do his bit as well.

I love you too Nutty, not lesbo either. I like my men hairy and frankly you are not hairy enough for me at all.

I should say we have had the opposite problem in this house - DH has gone off sex because of overwork. Last night I made him perform, and even put attractive underwear on to encourage him a bit.

The effect was admittedly somewhat spoiled when I got into bed and was having trouble slowly manoeuvering backwards into position because of my SPD. DH started going "Beep, beep, this vehicle is reversing" which was very cruel, but so funny I had to laugh for at least five minutes and PMSL!!! I am still laughing now!!

You gotta laff, nutty.

i'm a bit in awe reading about barbella feeding three babies! wow! what a woman! makes me feel like pulling myself together after a day of stressing and worrying about money and not being able to afford stuff (like prams, cots etc) . and barberella, my bloke has had a similar reaction from his friends "your life is over mate" . I think it says more about them than it does him.

I'm feeling a bit lucky when it comes to sex, in that I'm still feeling remarkably up for it. The way i look at it, it's the only mind altering thing i have left that i'm allowed to do, so the more orgasms the better please.

sorry that you're not getting much satisfaction nutty sweetie xxx and hello hello everyone else..

where's springy vanished to?

LOL at BoffinMum's comment! Had a friend round for tea today who said she hasn't had sex since her baby was conceived... she's nearly 8 months pregnant and I can reassure you her DH won't get any sex for about 6 months after the birth either. Clairey don't feel bad, with thrush really it's the last thing you should do anyway!

Bleuravin, cheesecake recipe sounds divine, will try and make it when I next feel like spending more than 2 minutes in the kitchen - DH still on cooking duty

good evening!
ds in bed, dh reading magazine and I am in bed again trying not to itch. thanks for itching advice, ended up taking piriton last time but am hoping just to keep going with the oil for now. am using bio oil at the moment but will get some pharacutical olive oil as is cheaper and bathing in e45. bathing is just a way to get some relief but i see what you are saying...

gosh am i a freak for still wanting sex? i bet it'll all change from now on.....