Due May 2009 - our bellies are getting as big as Santa's

[FiKelly]

It'll be an alternative merry Christmas for us this year ;)

Bit of a funny question but i got a letter today to say that i am due my cervical smear test next month (last one was feb 06). I have looked on the net and there's no reason not to have one during pg but i feel a bit anxious about it. But then if i wait til after then it will probably be more like aug 09. Would you just get it over with or would you delay it?

Hi everyone... not had a chance to catch up... missed a few days and already there's a mountain on pages to read!

pula I was due a smear when I was pregnant with DS last time. They said they'd prefer to delay it when I mentioned that I was pregnant, until after DS birth & a bit of time for 'things' to settle down/heal first.

Good Morning Ladies'n'bumps - any news on nikkiemadisonandbump??? Bit of a sad shock. Makes me think we're not out of the woods yet....

Anyhow, Moonlit, re the moses basket - I used mine during daytime when baby slept in living room, and my stepfather had made a crib for him which he used at night.

Welcome to the new ladies who have joined our list!!

Does anyone else have a very sensitive belly button? I can barely tolerate anything touching it! maybe cos it's stretching! lovely!

Also saw this on my yahoo news page. It's about the proven benefits of therapy when dealing with PND. So if anyone is beginning to feel the signs, or if you get them after the birth PLEASE tell your GP and ask for treatment asap.

Thanks for your comments on prams/buggies/pramettes/strollers/travel systems/3'n'1 systems etc etc - why do the manufacturers make the choice so complicated with their jargon!!!!! I'm going to a shop tomorrow that sells Bugaboo, iCandy, M&P (hate them!!) etc etc so should get to see a good few. I wish there was a website that you could tick your wish list and up pops the pram for you out of all those currently available for 2009!!! I have used Which? but they don't have the full range - incidently Bugaboo cameleon didn't get that great a write up review... in my experience though I make my own mind up about things! Esp when the M&P Pliko system is a Best Buy - WHAT???????? I HATED that system!

Sorry for long post - anything to side line me from doing the accounts!!!

After having a very grumpy DH last night (intimacy 'didn't go his way' if you catch my drift!) he got very angry and started telling me what he thought about a lot of things. He exclaimed it is all ok for me cos I've got what i want - ie a baby on the way! That all his problems are because of me - I pointed out that that is NOT true - namely a new high-stress job with long hours and high intensity work; his w**ker of a brother who is a big stress on our lives at the moment;starting up our own business - which I manage on a daily basis. I didn't shout or get angry, in fact I just lay there and let him go off on one. Then he informed me, or rather told me that I am not fanciable at the moment, nor was I before I got pregnant either!! (didnt stop him performing then!!) And if he wasn't about noone whould take me! Though he did say I am pretty... at times, but when this baby comes I HAVE TO get myself sorted out - ie he wants me to get fit and lose weight etc (you know the same old story). He thought I was not listening to him, and he went off about that too - but I told him calmly I was listening to all he said. All this because he 'didn't cum' and I was too sore to continue with the 'job in hand'!! That was another issue - I should have told him I wasn't up to doing it - I did tell him I had to take 2 co-codamol and was feeling very drowsy, and my neck was sore and both arm were pins and needles.

Why do men (or at least my DH) get like this?? Other times he can be loving and supportive, but have a sex isue and hell hits off!! I jsut wish I understood what his anger is about, cos I don't believe for one minute he is angry with me. I'm 5'6" and size 14. I'm not huge, but neither have I any interest in becoming a size 10! he's not that great looking, but I love him for who/what he is. He too is over weight.

Any how, the point of this is that I phoned my local leosure centre to find out what anti-natal classes they run, thinking going to an aqua class would be something at least! Do you know what - THEY DO NOT RUN ANY!!! Zilch! Nothing! I htink that's attrocious!

divedaisy that's all you need! as if we don't feel like beached whales already and the comments re before getting pregnant are totally unjust. Before getting pregnant this time i was a size 14 and i'm 5'7 and there's no way that's unattractive... I was a size 12 before DS and was just carrying a bit of weight all over.. about 10lbs more than my pre ds weight. Men can get a real bee in their bonnets sometimes... my dh has rants sometimes but mostly about the state of our apartment which he says is filthy. It is definitely not! i can't help it if he is a bit OCD about where he likes things put etc... usually the rants come when he's stressed or not well. The rest of the time he's normal and an odd speck of dust on the TV doesn't create a meltdown! With a dog and a toddler there's no way our place is ever going to look like a un-lived in show home all the time and it's unreasonable to think otherwise.

I think you hit the nail on the head & you have a case of the stressed DH and not getting that err release obviously just tipped the balance. He'll probably be feeling bad about the rant now.. but him off loading like that will have done nothing for your mood. It usually takes days for me to get over one of DH's rants and that puts me even more off any hanky panky than i was before... arrgh MEN! love'em & sometimes not so love'em

divedaisy

Poor you, but it does sound familiar. They are rather goverened by their knobs.

It is a time when you feel a little up & down about the way you look, some days you do feel like a blob, other days you feel pregnant and fabulous. It does seem to be an easy topic to wound you with, they know how we feel about our changing bodies!

My DH is a little like this - when he is stressed he has a tendency to say hurtful things (he told me he thought I'd got pregnant deliberately to have 6 months off work, being a lazy cow!!!), it's a horrible situation to be in when they are like that (I think this is where the childishness of men comes through).

All I can say is chin up, bollocks to him and keep looking to us to tell you he's full of shite (and that we're all in the same waddly, blobby, blissful state)!!!

I don't do hugs (human contact eeeeeeek)!!! I am sending goooood vibes your way instead...

divedaisy, sorry about the argument with your husband. my DH and I have the same problem usually after feelings/small problems have built up after a period and then he or we explode at each other.

another subject, thanks for the PND article link. i'm still being counselled for it but feeling better and am going to be very vigilant this time.

and other subject, my friend just had a home birth, a relatively quick delivery. I'm a little jealous but don't think i'm brave enough to do it. I'm worried I need to be by pain relief (ie epidural) if need be so I feel like a wimp. Also, what to do with two children during the birth? I defn don't want my inlaws traipsing in/out with them whilst i'm 'mooing' . And i can't order the baby to come during Wed/Thu nursery hours, can i? 'twould be nice.

pulapula - Two reasons why it's a better idea to wait until after the birth for smear test:
(1) Even if results are bad, there is nothing to do, since you are pregnant.
(2) When we are pregnant, hormones cause even normal cells to look borderline cancerous (moles grow, for example). This is why false positives are high in smear tests or biopsies (breast, mole, etc) during pregnancy.

A couple of additional months will not change anything, especially if you have kept up your previous smear test appointments.

divedaisy - I used a Bugaboo Chameleon with DD it was great. Before, we had a Chicco C+ travel system and it was horrible - heavy, hard to steer, narrow, and uncomfortable.

divedaisy - sorry to hear about the argument you had with your DH. The only thing DH & I argue about is sex or lack of it! Hope things get better for you both.

I saw my consultant this week and he asked how I wanted to give birth this time i was in as I thought I was going to have to fight for what I wanted. I'm having a growth scan at 35 weeks, but I also have a dilemma, do I try and give birth naturally and hope that I have a baby smaller than 10lb and a smaller head or do i just have a c section??! DH thinks I should just cut my losses and have a c section, but I'm a bit Still at least I dont have to make a decision now.

I've also been to a physio class about my SPD, hopefully the exercises and techniques they taught us will do some good!

daizydoo

I was given exercises to do for SPD, I have been doing them daily and I am hoping they will become second nature.

Especially as I have not done my pelvic floor exercises after my other 2 but I have decided to do them religiously now that I have read that it can improve your sex life

Anything to improve it....

Hello everyone and welcome new ones - ladyhelen I'm due 3rd May too. And welcome belgian - how handy to have an expert join us. I suspect your advice will be much in demand!

divedaisy your argument with DH sounds horrid. I imagine he didn't mean what he said but was just feeling very, VERY frustrated. I hope, by now, he has apologised profusely and told you how utterly gorgeous you are and how in awe he is at the miracle your body is performing etc etc etc...

Just read back and seen that Nikkie has left this thread. Does anyone know what happened? I hope she is ok.

Re: the great buggy debate - I LOVE my M&P Pliko Travel System. I won't hear a word against it!

I'm still suffering a terrible cold - probably nothing that some Beechams Cold & Flu wouldn't sort out but since I can't have any I am feeling very sorry for myself and had to take the day off. DD went to Grandma's so I have had a proper sleep.

Evening,

divedaisy sorry to hear about your argument, as emmalina says, its probably extreme frustration. hope you get the apology you deserve soon.

Emmalina Sorry about your cold, lots of hot lemon and honey helped me at christmas and the odd soluble paracetomol too (I checked with NHS and a pharmacist that this was ok).

Hope I haven't missed anything else important today, am off to read back.

Have a nice weekend all.

divedaisy that is unnacceptable DH behaviour in my books - one of those comments and mine would be out in the street for the night! I find that sending mine to do sport helps with the frustration. Makes him much happier - he played footie last night and it was minus 1...keen.

Evening ladies and thank you for your kind welcome!

divedaisy Hope your DH has apologised for his rant at you last night. Bloody men and their cocks. I've got a feeling I shall be expected to indulge tonight. Its our anniversary and I guess I should make a bit of an effort! I have to say its the last thing I feel like at the moment.

We went to see Slumdog Millionaire this afternoon. Boy, its an intense film. Much more in your face than I expected. We both felt quite emotional when we came out. Its v v good though. Def worth seeing.

Hi Ladies.

Thanks for the concern, I am ok, as is baby, sorry I didnt mean to worry you all in that way.

Something has happened in RL which has meant that I can't be here anymore, hopefully I will be able to namechange and start again in the future but at the moment I just can't do it.

I will lurk and see how you all get on.

Nikkie

Nikkie,

Glad to hear you and baby are both OK and sorry to hear you can't continue on our thread.

It would be nice to hear from you in May to let us know about baby, but only if you feel you can.

Take care and good luck.

Nikkie - glad you and the baby are well. Best of luck in the future. Take care - Frazzled.

Think I'll go back to being frazzledoldbag today. It suits how I'm feeling

There, that's better. Full of cold, just putting kids to bed, exhausted. Boo.
Quite excited about the prospective homebirth idea though. Everyone (well, the 3 friends I've mentioned it to anyway) think it's a fab idea and 1 says she will do it with her next one too. On one hand it feels like we've got ages to wait then when I actually look at the calendar it's not that long! Not sure if that makes me happy or terrified!

By the way re: smears. I was due one when I found out I was pg last time. They wouldn't do it until DD was about 12 wks old - they said to minimise the risk of getting a false result was best to wait until all the hormones and cervix etc settled down. Guess that makes sense. As long as there is no other reason for concern I think best to wait.

divedaisy - I'm so sorry to hear about your awful argument. That is totally unacceptable behaviour from him - and I hope he is feeling very sheepish and has apologised properly for taking his frustrations out on you. I'm sending you a big virtual hug and hope you have a better night tonight. [hug] [hug] [hug]

Hi ladyhelen and welcome. Was thinking about going to see Slumdog Millionaire and will definitely make the time now. Sounds great.

Nikki thanks for letting us know you're ok.

I'm so glad Nikki and baby are ok.

Brill news about Nikki and bump phew!

Frazzled - how exciting about the home birth decision - good on you. I agree when you start to add up the months its not that long at all. I've found this time has whizzed by guess its cos I'm busy with an almost walking sproglet this time.

Agree about the smear - exactly the same happened to me.

Am off now DP been away and am shattered so having an early night and a good chill

Hi detsy so nice to see you back from your glamourous globe trotting! TBH I do find it slightly weird that I've decided on homebirth as up until a couple of months ago I would never have considered one. Too much mess and far too scary I always thought. I just adore my new house and have to be pursuaded out much of the time......maybe that's something to do with it? or maybe am just morphing into an earth mother or something.....? Eeek. Or maybe it's reading those lovely home birth threads on here that just make me go Awwwwwww, I want one of those!
I have to admit though that I had a stern chat with DH last night (who was fab at birth support with DD1 and utterly crap with DD2). I made it clear that obviously it wasn't his fault he'd forgotten how to suport me in labour last time as there had been a 5 yr gap and we hadn't bothered with antenatal classes the 2nd time, so therefore I am booking us into the NCT refresher classes. He didn't look keen, but when I suggested that perhaps I should instead ask one of my closest friends to be my birth partner instead if he didn't want to be involved he changed his tune pretty quickly and promised to do all he can to make it as good an experience as possible (and as far away from last time as poss!)
What are your plans? Are you hospital this time? How was your DH last time? Some men are unexpectedly fabulous.