Due Nov 2008 - Explosion Risks, Names Dilemmas and Baby shopping Galore!

[LadyBuzz]

New thread ladies

Ladybuzz - you have just reminded me of an article in Closer a few weeks ago - a woman was expressing her milk and then selling it to men on the internet who had fetishes about breast milk - now that I think that is (a) totally weird and (b) very selfish when she could be donating that milk to the local hospital.

We are having terrible two trouble here too. DD is not one for tantrums but she is stubborn and has started to be very defiant. She will not do one thing I tell her. At the moment I having an awful time trying to get her dresses and keep her that way. If the weather was better I would say 'to hell with it' but it is too cold now for that.

Can I run something by you ladies? Not sure if this would be possible and fairly sure dh wouldn't go for it but thought of it last night. At the moment dh is working flat out. Normal days he is gone from around 8 til 6 but every Tuesday and Thursday he teaches a night course and isn't home until close to 11pm. These long days are wearing me out both in terms of being with dd all day with no break and being on my own a lot. What do you think of the idea of getting someone in on those days just to help me out a little with the house and dd. Would it be a strange thing to advertise for because it wouldn't be a childminder or a cleaner really? I think I really want my mother or one of my sisters but they all work/have their own kids.

Funny that you are all mentioning iron. I had a call from the docs yesterday telling me that I should now be taking my iron tablets.
I knew it already and was going to ask the midwife tommorrow, at my appointment, if she would check my blood for my levels. Reason being that I have had a few dizzy spells, nothing too bad, but I just knew that my levels were low as this, along with seeing sparkles in front of your eyes, is the first indicator of low levels. Also I had low levels last time, so recognised the symptoms straight away.
They are awful things though. I am sure I have mentioned before the green/black poo.
Can't believe that there are places that tell you to take it all the time! Aren't there other side effects too?
I don't know if it would dramaticaly help you energy levels though? But perhaps trying something like the spatone stuff might help. Prob best to mention it to the midwife though. Also to ask them to check your levels, to be sure, would also probably be a good thing.

I missed the BF programme too. But I could understand expressing for prem babies but feeding others, not so sure. Swapping babies??!! Oddbegod.
And sexual feelings when feeding other peoples babies, if that is the case, then it is very very wrong, IMPO!!

ceebee I have exactly the same car seat problem with dd, she wont be lifted in as this causes a tantrum but the car seat is a bit too high for her so she sits herself next to the car seat quite often! Its a nightmare getting her in sometimes and have took to getting her climb while I sort push her up at same time which seems to work (most of the time it doesnt if she realises I have helped!!) Looking at everyone else who has similar problems its definately a terrible 2's thing and hopefully will pass

I didnt watch that programme last night but hearing all your comments about it i'm glad I didnt

suiledonn - I think you know what is best for you and DD. If you feel it would help getting someone in then do it!

What about instead DD doing half days at a nursery? I cut my DS nursery days from full days Mon-Wed (was working) since mat leave to mon & tues AM. It is amazing how much I have managed to get done 8-1 on the days he is at nursery. Also a good break still for the both of us. Also thinking of DH dropping DS off for 8am so I can get a lie in.

When I was visiting my neices last week, I had the same thoughts about my DD, vbab, where did she go??
She was a wee monster sometimes!
Terrible two's hitting and the sudden realisation of all the things she could be doing but hadn't realised that she could until she watched, 4 year old and 8 year old, cousins doing so much more.
It depends on the circumstances if I find it all quiet amusing, or patience testing annoying!
suiledon Aren't you looking for a nanny type of person? Don't they do all of the things you are asking, whilst childminders and cleaners are specific? I am not sure, but what you are asking for does not seem unreasonable.
That is prob why I spend so much time at my mums, who does not work, it breaks up the day/week making me feel much more able to cope.

Ah, chocgal that'll be the levels my MW talks about then I didn't know what they were called or anything, just that they should be checked, epesh mine as I got real low last time, in the third trimester. I was doubling up on pills and spatone in the last weeks, cos they warned me to do my best to bring them up or I might struggle for energy when trying to give birth.

Suiledonn I think that would be a good idea I'm like twinkling if I am around with family etc or friends it breaks the day up and makes things alot easier to deal with!
Would it be worth contact your local college to see if any of the people on the nursery nursing course need a home placement - that way it should be fee or very cheap?
Ceebee ewww ewww ewww to the grown men wanting breast milk that is very very wrong I was not impressed when searching for real nappies on ebay and the adult baby ones came up either . Each to their own I suppose but

I am with you on that one, ladybuzz ewww ewww Adult Nappies??!!
That is just........I have no words for how I feel about that!

I watched that programme last night and although feel that these sorts of shows don't paint breastfeeding mothers in a very good light in general, it was a better programme than extraordinary breastfeeders that was on a few months ago.

I suppose I am quite "odd" in that I extended breastfeed for 3 years, but in our case, it was definately for the sake of ds2 and not my own, I was ready for my body back. I did pump milk in the hopes of catching a bit of a break every now and then or being able to go out without him, but he never took to a bottle (ended up he had alot of oral sensory issues). I became a milk donor for Birmingham Women's hospital's milk bank. I am very proud of the fact that my milk saved not only my own baby, but other poorly babies too. I fully plan on donating again if possible.

As for the issues of who breastfeeds my child and breastfeeding other child, the line becomes less clear for me. Breastfeeding is a very intimate experience (perhaps what the woman who didn't speak good english meant as opposed to sexual.....at least I hope so!). If It was an emergency and I was ASKED to breastfeed another child, I probably would providing there was enough for my baby first. As for my own baby, I have to agree with Kate Garraway, my breast is best for my own baby and I would only resort to another feeding my baby direct from the breast in a life & death situation. I know it would make me feel jealous and inadequate as a mother. I could never just pick up a baby and breastfeed it without permission, I would be horrified if someone did that to my baby. I definately do not agree with passing a baby around to nurse from different breasts just for the sake of it, how confusing for the baby, plus everyone knows that your own milk is perfectly made up for the stage your baby is at.

HM2J, can u pop over to allergies sectin for me

suiledonn - that sounds like really hard work. I am looking for a similar type of help...I am going to put a wanted notice up in the local church where they have lots of toddler groups, for a mum (with school age kids) or a grandma to come and help out with babies. I can't afford a nanny and it is not really necessary as I would be home with the person just, for example they could change nappies and entertain babies while I get on with something else. Also, my ds is at playschool 4 mornings a week now. I started him 2x per week when he was 2.5 as he was getting clingy. It's a lot cheaper than nursery, it's only 2.5hrs a day, but it is a real relief and he comes back shattered and ready for a long sleep. I think you will definitely need the exra help/ space with another baby...Also can dh give up the nigh teaching for a while, till your new baby is a bit bigger?

ceebee - not many words of wisdom. They all have 'bad days' I think, like us. Hopefully won't be repeated too frequently. One thing we do in our house (and I know it's controversial on mumsnet) is time out. It really seems to work with ds when he is in one of 'those moods'. A few minutes sitting still seems to sober him up a bit/ snap him out of it (most of the time anyway!), almost like he just needs the space to calm down. (I certainly need it too ). We probably started it sometime around your ds's age (2ish). It's suprising they will actually do it, when can be disobedient about everything else, but for some reason he never messes with me when I tell him time out (usually sitting on stairs in our house as there are no other distractions there, but can be done anywhere).

I didn't see the BF programme either, but I can imagine how they distorted it. I had a weird experience once when I looked after my friend's very newborn son and she wasn't there. I was feeding him a bottle and I just desperately wanted to bf him! (I had no kids yet and obv no milk). Anyway, I did restrain myself . But I don't know, it was quite an intense emotion and I remember it really vividly. I think one of the 'good' aspects about the other mothers bfing is that we can be very clingy/ precious with our own kids, and I think it is good for them to be picked up by other people eg. when going to a baby group I always encouraged other people to hold my ds. He's very sociable now, not sure if anything to do with it!!

Coming Misdee! It's been a while since I have been there...which thrread?

dd1 and peanut butter

Never mind, I see it!

I responded with my thoughts, pretty much the same as the others really!

Evening all!

I am having my baby, my son, at the Lindo wing but still havent had any confirmation/ welcome letter etc from them. Nothing at all despite it's only two months to go. I've called them numerous times but they keep saying we will receive them soon. So and so has been on hold etc.
Has anyone here any experience with them? Shall I worry? We havent paid anything yet, Ever so grateful for any advise. Thanks girls!

PS just started my own blogg re pregnancy etc so pls feel free to have a peak (it needs a lot of attention but am new to this) and come with suggestions.
catscompilation.blogspot.com/

Thanks hanaflower - will try a search.

just almost been blubbing again at #'who gets the heart' on sky anytime tv.

also i have a hopeful moving date. in just over 4 weeks if we go for the later date! eeeeekkkk!!!

am 30 weeks today

my pram arrived as well today. was a good price for a second hand silvercross. probl;em is, its very wide and no idea if it will fit through my new front door! friend of mine is measuring her front door tnight for me. hopefulyl it will fit through ok, as it will be my downstairs place for baby to sleep in the daytime.

misdee i'm sure it will fit. our front door is about the narrowest I have seen and could NEARLY fit a narrow double buggy (28inches).

I didn't see the breastfeeding programme last night but reading your comments reminds me of an incident that happened when my dd was newborn. Our NCT group used to meet up weekly at each other's houses. The lady who was hosting this particular coffee morning was called away to the phone and in the meantime her baby started crying. One of our group (no longer part of it I hasten to add) picked up the baby, whipped out her boob and stuck her nipple in it's mouth! We were all quite new friends so no one knew what to say but we all felt extremely uncomfortable about it. The mother was horrified when she came back into the room and admitted to us later that she felt that her baby had been poisoned as she had only ever had her mother's milk. The culprit could see no harm in what she'd done and couldn't understand the mother's reaction. I'm all for helping out in a life or death situation but I feel very strongly that breastfeeding is a special bonding time for mother and baby - no intention of offending anyone that feels differently.

I feel like I've got muscle ache between the tops of my legs and where they meet my 'bits'. It's worse if I sit still for too long. Anyone else suffering this? Also been suffering from the odd lightheaded spell and my 28 week bloods showed as border line aenemic. I haven't been taking iron tabs as they made me so constipated last time. I've been told that dried apricots are a good natural source of iron. Anyone else heard that?

Suiledonn - you could try advertising for a mother's help. My friend has one and she basically does what my friend can't manage.

Betti - I bet that was a really difficult situation actually seeing someone do that in real life. I think I too would have been stunned into silence!

Suiledonn - advertising for help sounds like a great idea and I am sure there will be someone out there who would love to do a couple of hours (even if it was for company for them aswell). Or, would you consider putting DD in nursery for the odd half day to give you a break?

Well, isn't it funny with children?? This morning, it was a relief to drop DS off at nursery but when I got home today, DH had picked him up and he was stood at the lounge window with a huge grin and then ran to the door and started popping his hands out of the letterbox for me.....all is now forgiven (until tomorrow morning no doubt when it will all start again...........)

Betti I've been getting that ache at the tops of my legs around the pubic bone you describe. Its worse when I get up in the morning and when I've been sitting still for a long time. I was told it was ligaments stretching so nothing to worry about but very uncomfortable nonetheless
I've just been sitting with my TENS machine on for my back pain. Thought I'd better get it out and work out how it works now, rather than when labour starts and then thought I might as well try it on my back and it seems to have helped. I also now know how to work the machine
I didn't see the BF programme last night either. Shame it wasn't on one of the BBC channels otherwise I could have had a look on the iplayer.

I have had those pains too betti
Good to have an idea of what it is, cricri

OMG I cannot imagine having been in that room, or being that babies mother. I would have been shocked to the core. Did she come back in to witness or was she told afterward? I just can't imagine walking into a room to find my PNB on someone elses boob!