The November 2023-ish baby club!

[Spareincoming]

A new thread, under a new topic!
Welcome all and please tag anyone I’ve not, because I just copied and pasted from the old thread…

@spareincoming @Pinkplantcase @leeanneD11 @LilmissCa @FlyingHighFlyingLow
@Psqueak87
@spanglesj
@BabyBabyBaby123
@Houseonthehills
@GreenAventurine
@reememberly
@Cegbee
@DollyGx
@38andtrying
@JD90
@travellingislife
@mldn
@sb86
@TMI2000

@LeeanneD11 I think it’s cow and gate one currently but I’ve used the Kendamil one too, I just buy what’s on offer… where it says make with water I use formula instead. A HV told me to do it years ago.

Ok perfect I'll give one of them a go and see how we get on , thank you for recommendations I appreciate it xx

@Spareincoming we've got a tooth coming through too, LO is around 5 months. She's often refusing to feed too and has become very unsettled. How long does this phase last?

@JoyApple The longest one of mine went without a decent feed when teething was over 24 hours. It was an half ounce here and there and had me really worried; the pharmacist swore by Anbesol liquid and I’ve used it on the first few teeth ever since.
By the second application the food refusing child was taking milk again. (That child’s go to illness indicator is food refusal even now!)

I find the unsettledness lasts until the tooth is about half way through but then there’s usually another coming through too… Sorry!

A few people have told me that ibruprofen is better for teething but I’ve always stuck with Calpol and Anbesol liquid.
I also think a good probiotic helps with the bad nappies teething can bring, but that’s purely anecdotal on my part!

@LeeanneD11 late to reply but were formula fed too. I make up 7oz feeds, sometimes she can finish the whole 7oz and sometimes she only takes 5oz. Feeds every 3-4 hours.

If your LO is finishing the full bottle and crying you could possibly up his feeds to 7oz to see if that will settle him.
If he’s still unsettled it could be a bit of reflux.
We’ve noticed with our LO she had a bit more spit up in the last week and has been a bit uneasy with it. We’ve given her gaviscon every other feed and it’s definitely improved it.

We bought our high chair yesterday and LO got to try it out. She’ll be 18 weeks on Friday but trying to hold off of weaning for another week or 2 🙈 then the fun begins 🙈😂😂

@Spareincoming thanks! I've just ordered the anbesol liquid. I also tried bonjela but didn't seem to do much.

I'm really struggling. She's crying a lot and not even settling with walking. I just hope it passes quickly as she's refusing milk and dummy (unless distracted)

My LO is also suffering loads with his teeth and oh my god the nappies 🥲 the amount of poo explosions we have had since yesterday!
just a little note for any other formula feeding mums whose baby is suffering with reflux, my baby was so so sicky, constantly soaking through his clothes and going through so many outfits a day! I’ve moved him to the cow and gate anti reflux formula and he has been a totally different baby, aside from the teething grizzles!

https://www.bibbilyboo.co.uk/collections/waterproof-dribble-bibs

Bit more spenny but these are only bibs he doesn't soak through and last all day!

Happy first Easter/chocolate for breakfast day to the little ones!

How is everyone's weight loss going/not going?
I had a csection and although I've lost weight everywhere else but tummy, I'm still 10kg over my
Pre baby weight 😒

@foodislife1 I don't weigh myself, but I'm fitting into most of my clothes so I'm on track. I'm definitely more squidgy around the middle and not as fit.

Baby is still EBF so that's helped. I am petite and lost too much weight while on maternity with DC1 so I'm one of those horrible folk who have to make sure I keep weight on.

My pelvic floor is not what it used to be though 🙈 does some kegels

I also had a c section, stomach area definitely more out still, but I was so so sick while pregnant I actually came home from hospital 5kg lighter than I was before I got pregnant. I've stayed around that.

I’ve got a good 7kg still to lose; it feels like it’s all around my waist and isn’t shifting; I could do with losing 10kg but 7kg would be pre baby weight.
I think I’ve lost then gained again too. And my motivation is low!

How are your napping/ sleeping going? Have you noticed the 4 months sleep regression/ progression?
I think we only had a few days of it unless she’s not been through it yet.. She’s soon 5 months old, eating once per night and has 45 min naps, occasionally a 1.5h nap, usually 4 a day.
She’s ebf but I’m desperate for her to take the bottle so my hubby can feed her now and again. No luck so far though.

Weight wise; I’m a couple of kg’s heavier than pre pregnancy and flabbier..I’ve got a c section pouch that seems bigger now than with my first too. I also didn’t loose the extra weight until I stopped bf the last time.

Is anyone feeling low/ depressed?
I’m not sure I’m suffering from a low grade post natal depression or if it’s just the newborn stage that’s hard. I find it very difficult that my DD isn’t taking the bottle so I’m very tied to her all the time, I’d like to be able to just do something on my own for more than a couple of hours.
I’m constantly tired even though I get around 7-8h a night, broken but still. I’m angry all the time and have no patience. I don’t want to do anything but I hate being stuck in the house. Nothing feels fun. I force myself to keep the house tidy, walk the dog, see friends etc, but all I’d like to do is to pull the duvet over my head and stay there. I feel like if I was depressed I wouldn’t be able to do the things I still do even though I don’t like it and don’t want to?
I’ve made an appointment with my gp but think I’ll cancel it as I don’t know how they could help and I’m not sure I’m actually depressed.

@Travellingislife have you tried cup feeding? I haven’t yet but it’s on my list. DD is ebf and did take a bottle when younger but we forgot to try it for a month or so and now she’s forgotten what to do with a bottle 🙈 with cup feeding they sort of lap up the milk with their tongue. That’s the theory anyway.

If your little ones 5 months it won’t be too long before weaning and teaching baby how to use an open cup anyway.

Keep the GP appointment, tbh you do sound a bit depressed. How long have you felt like this for?

@foodislife1 I’m about 3kg off my pre pregnancy weight. Ive lost it faster than I did first time round but I’ve also been rushing round much more also having a 2yo. I think breastfeeding really takes the weight off me too that’s what I found first time round.

I’m also tall so quite a forgiving body shape for extra weight.

Still haven’t got the box of pre pregnancy clothes down from the loft yet though!

I gained a lot of weight but seemingly water because it dropped off quickly. I seem to have gained actual weight in the last month despite the walking with a sling and constant jigging with a reluxy baby. He is medicated now and improving so maybe now that I can actually put him down I am eating more! My clothes are almost back to suiting me except some tops. I have decent breastfeeding bras but my boobs are huuuge at times and empty other times so the bra never fits perfectly and ruins my tops. I also seem to have become wider on my back. Hopefully it will drop off eventually

@foodislife1 I gained 21kg, lost 4kg when I gave birth - baby and placenta and all the other birthing accessories, and since then (5 months) I’ve only managed to lose another 6.5kg, so I’m still about 10-11kg over my ideal weight. I was sick of wearing leggings so last week I finally decided to go and buy some jeans that would fit me, and I had to buy 2 whole sizes bigger than I used to be, devastated. Really need to up my exercise but I’ve got no motivation, and I don’t even have a C-section to blame! My old jeans barely get past my knees, I’m really holding all the weight in my thigh, hip and arse area. I hate looking at myself in the mirror!

@Travellingislife night sleep is not great, and naps are chaotic. Eira will be 5 months old this week, no sign of the sleep regression, so I assumed it has happened already and we didn’t notice as she’s never slept more than 3 hour chunks at night. Right now we put her to bed around 8pm, she has no issues getting to sleep, but she’ll wake for food at 11pm and 3am and multiple times in between cause her dummy has fallen out. At 5am she’ll wake up full of beans, and I’ll scoop her up and bring her into my bed and beg her for another 2 hours sleep. It’s about 50/50 whether I’m successful in convincing her or not. Nap wise, she has 3-4 a day, ranging from 30 mins to 1.5 hours.

you should keep that dr appointment for sure, sounds like a touch of depression. I am not suffering but I think I’ve had it easy with my partner being off work and switching baby to formula on week 3. It was the hardest decision I had ever made, and mentally making that decision was really tough. But now I see it was the right decision for me, and luckily she took to formula and bottle well. I’m deffo suffering from the anxiety, and I’ve never had anything like it before. I’ve always lived with the assumption that everything will be ok, and now I’m constantly worried something awful is about to happen. It lessens every week though so I’m hoping it will run its course. Look after yourself 🤍

Weight wise I have no idea what is going on atm, I'm in my old clothes but just fitting different. I've got too many different things to juggle to really care if I'm honest, keeping myself going is about where I'm at for now.

@Travellingislife keep the apt. With my first I was horrendously depressed but still 'functioning' because my need to appear like I was doing the whole mum thing well was so strong. It was however all part of it. Good luck

Thanks everyone! I’ll keep the appointment.

@PinkPlantCase I think it’s crept up on me quietly, maybe the last couple of months. I felt so happy and excited the first few months.

@Psqueak87 it’s super hard not getting much sleep, my son wasn’t a great sleeper and I was going crazy as I never got more than 2-3h chunks, it takes me ages to go back to sleep once I’m awake too.
We have the dummy problem as well, I’m thinking of ditching it soon. I’m sleeping with earplugs in the spare room and my husband deals with the dummy thankfully or I’d not sleep at all.
I’m glad the anxiety seems to ease up, it’s such huge change being a mum and your baby is your whole world!

@JD90 that sounds like me, I want to appear like nothing is wrong.
What did you do to get better? I’m reluctant to take any medication but will see what the gp says.

@Travellingislife Keep the appointment, you’ll be so glad for it if you do. I had PND with my son and was still functioning. House kept clean and tidy, school runs every day, meals cooked and I appeared smart and put together everyday, despite looking absolutely drained (I put it down to the newborn phase). What no one knew was that I had to use every ounce of energy I had just to get out of bed, and everything I did in the day just felt so robotic, I had lost all excitement I had for just about everything and all the things I did, I forced myself to do because I felt I had no choice, I needed to keep functioning. I didn’t think at the time that l I fitted the mould for any kind of depression as I wasn’t laying in bed or crying all day every day, so I never reached out about how I was feeling. It took my husband and some very gentle encouragement before our 6 month Health Visitor check to get me to tell the HV I wasn’t feeling the best. I still felt daft for mentioning it even when she was being kind and supportive and straight away right in front of me put in a referral to the perinatal mental health team. It ended up being one of the best things I could have ever have done opening up to the HV as I very slowly realised that I was suffering from depression, and it felt like such a relief to know there was much more to what I was feeling. This was almost five years ago now and I got in to a great place with no medication, just lots of support from the perinatal team and a few goes at CBT for the anxiety.

@WriMum22 thank you! There seem to be something like a “high functioning depressive state”. I’m glad you got the help you needed!
I’ve now used our text service and waiting for a call back from a health visitor.

Completely agree with @WriMum22

@Travellingislife I personally went on medication. However I have had serious diagnosed mental health problems for many years so meds for me was pretty second nature. Plus it was really difficult to access talking therapy (it was almost 15 years ago) and if you did it was so limited too. Maybe ask your gp if your area has a perinatal mental health team at all. :)

Through it all the biggest step was realising there was a problem as it helped me recognise my behaviour/feelings when they changed. Not just forcing myself to keep going as 'I'm sure everyone feels like this because it's hard'

I've found sleep to have a much bigger effect than I thought it would. In the early days could 100% have turned into PND/PNA. If I got some sleep I was fine. But my baby is a non-sleeper that still wakes 6-7 times a night on average. After a couple of weeks of 45 min stretches I was bad. Very very bad. I was checking he was breathing constantly. Sobbing not wanting to wish him to sleep because 'what if I got my wish but then he didn't wake up again'. My DH clued in quickly and did what he could to help to get me some longer stretches and more sleep and I was much better within a couple of days. He's also now diagnosed and medicated CMPA/reflux so now I can cosleep without him throwing up all over me which has been a game changer as I can sleep while I feed rather than feed 20 min, hold up 20 min then try sleep until he woke again 20 min later.