Pregnancy after loss - Autumn Babies 2021 - Thread 3

[Pancakes7]

Hello! We're on thread 3 already!!

@PumpkinEverything
@ahuss
@Bellabubble
@Strawberry08
@marplemead
@MrsTD88
@Cafeaulait27
@ELMcg
@NatJ24
@JRH4622
@vitaminb33
@imisscoffee
@Firevie
@lamby12
@smarty4
@Smurf123

I hope that's everyone! If not please tag people if you think of any x

I hope you're ok @lamby12, is EPU open at the weekend where you are? My bleeds were always late at night so I would end up at a&e rather than EPU and would be scanned the next day as there weren't any sonographers in, but they've scanned me on a weekend before. Failing that, are you able to book a private scan? Take it easy xx

Thank you ladies. There hasn't been any more yet but I feel very on edge. I wouldn't be worried about cramps on their own as I've had some bad cramps this pregnancy - wind and otherwise! It's the pink blood plus cramps that panics me.

I've just cancelled a private scan that was due to be on Sunday, and started to relax a bit prior to this. But to be honest if there is possibly a problem I wouldn't want to go to a private scan anyway - they can't do any follow up and then you're left to your own devices for next steps.

The EPU are open at the weekend on mornings here, so I am going to try and stay calm over the evening and night and hope that it doesn't continue or worsen. If it does, I'll call EPU over the weekend.

DH says I'm panicking over nothing and spotting is just another symptom like cramps, sickness, etc (he's read the pamphlet...) and until/unless it's bright red i should chill?! But he doesn't get the panic that it could also be the start of something and just the sheer panic of seeing blood. Having seen a heartbeat twice and now being 8 weeks I'm really hoping that luck is on my side this time. X

@lamby12 I know it's so hard Woodhall given all our histories but hopefully it will all be fine. A hb at 8 weeks is a good thing.
I had pink spotting at 8 and 9 weeks it wasn't a lot but it happened a few times a couple days apart. I was scanned for first time just after 9 weeks and thankfully all was ok and they couldn't see any reason for the bleeding. I'm now 23 weeks and touch wood all is OK so far. I know it won't help much but it really could just be you being more sensitive down there due to pregnancy. Hope your OK

@lamby12 I have read that things are more sensitive down there so can bleed more easily - 🤞🏻 for you that it’s just a little bit of agitation down there!

@imisscoffee that must have been a hard decision to make in such a short time - I totally agree with you about it allowing Frank to have dignity xx

@lamby12 I’m so sorry you’re going through this worry. It hopefully will be that you just bleed more easily in pregnancy like some women do, but I completely understand your concerns as I have experienced bleeding in pregnancy too. I hope you manage to get some reassurance soon xxx

I was wondering if you guys could let me know your opinions on NIPT. My husband and I are thinking about having it for extra reassurance, even though it’s not diagnostic it is very good at detecting downs, if not so much the rarer edwards or pataus.

I got my screening results back yesterday and they came back low risk, 1:5670 for downs and 1:20000 for edwards/pataus. At first I was very reassured by this, but after thinking about it I’m still leaning towards getting the NIPT.

My hospital offers NIPT for free if you get a high risk result, and offers it for £350 if you get low risk but still want it. I believe it would be just the bloods and you don’t get another scan but I’m not sure. They do the SAFE test at my hospital as appears to harmony or panorama, has anyone here done the SSAFE one?

We’re both people who like to be in control, and I feel the extra reassurance would help me relax a bit more. But then I worry about the anxiety of waiting for results, and then what if it come back high chance? We definitely would like to know as much as possible before the birth so we can make decisions and be informed, but I worry if it was a ‘false positive’ and we ended up doing a cvs and the risk of miscarriage and all that worry for no reason.

So much to think about! Would be great to hear you guys thoughts as women who’ve had losses before xx

@lamby12 I'm so sorry you're going through this worry again. I hope it's nothing. Worth asking for a reassurance scan from epu. Sending positive thoughts your way ❤️

Yeah I can't believe how close my scan finally is. It's scary and exciting.

You might have seen my post on Facebook. But we've all got an awful cold. DS coughed a couple of times and I had a panic that if I got it and coughed they wouldn't let me have my scan. I had a cry. Ordered home covid test just incase. Which I've sent off. But DS hasn't really coughed since lol and no temp. So possible overreaction from me.

@Cafeaulait27 Sorry no experience with that. Personally a low risk result is enough for me. The conditions are very rare. I just did nhs screening for DS and all do that again. Worth speaking to your midwife about it to find out more.

@Cafeaulait27 that's good news about the screening! I think I'm probably unusual in that I'm also someone who likes to be in as much control as possible, but ultimately for all my pregnancies I've chosen not to have the screening or further tests.

I think it's a very personal calculation, for me I don't have any risk factors but I do have issues with anxiety regarding the pregnancy and miscarriage risks so ultimately I decided, due to the very low risks involved, I'd rather not put myself through additional stress. I was mostly influenced by the false positive rates, although it's not entirely clear how common they are - this link is useful www.nuffieldbioethics.org/blog/nipt-private.

Also just as further insight on how I thought about it, as the most common risk is Down syndrome and I've worked with teenagers with Down syndrome, they were some of the most lovely and happy people I've met, and I'm in a privileged position (with my age and family situation) that I'd be in an okay position to look after a child with extra needs. But the concerns about it are valid and everyone makes their own assessment.

Finally - on the other side of it (because I over research) if you did opt for further testing the current research suggests if you did want to have amniocentesis or CVS to clarify the result the actual risk of miscarriage is very low (much lower than is commonly cited), as the old 1 in 100 or 1 in 200 statistics are prior to better techniques being used, it's probably more like 1 in 600 or 1 in 800 (see screenshot).

@vitaminb33 thank you so much for this information! I have just had a read through of that link 🤓

It seems to be saying that NIPT is really good at predicting low chance results (99% negative predictive value) so I guess that means if it’s low chance you can be pretty sure it’s accurate (not 100% though). It seems to fall down on giving ‘false positives’ where people are told they are high chance when actually they aren’t. Does that sound like I’ve interpreted it correctly?

So I guess the risk is if I get a high chance result it’s more likely that it’s a false positive, but if i get low chance I can probably relax a bit more. I feel like as our combined screening was good we’re likely to get a low chance result on NIPT but I’m still on the fence about whether to go for it or not...

@Cafeaulait27 yes I think you've read that right! The tests seem to be pretty good on avoiding false negatives, the uncertainty is more if you get a "high risk" result.

I also really like Amy Kiefer who writes the blog 'Expecting Science', if you really want to submerge yourself in all the information she wrote this going into lots of detail on prenatal testing expectingscience.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/bloomlife_prenatal_testing_ebook.pdf

Thank you @vitaminb33 just had a read - so informative!

Thank you @Cafeaulait27 @Bellabubble @Pancakes7 @Smurf123

I called EPU again this morning and they have booked me in for a scan Tuesday AM. That's good, but feels like a long wait. I'd like to think it would have stopped by then.

I keep thinking it's stopped as I have a few hours without any, but then go again for a wee and there's more.

It's seems to have gone from light pink (yesterday aft), to brown yesterday evening and this morning; to almost black this afternoon. I wouldn't say it was a clot but just a small about of black stringy discharge. Has anyone had anything like this?
I'm off the understanding that black isn't too worrying as it means it's fairly old blood being pushed out, but the stringy stuff worried me a bit. It could just be mixed with discharge but also worry it's the start of tissue or something.

I haven't had any bright red. Really need to try and keep calm until Tuesday but it's so difficult. I am expecting any minute to go and see things have taken a turn for the worse. I'm in the bathroom every 10 minutes.

Sorry to be going on and on, I just don't really have any outlet for this worry as DH is busy
looking after DD and getting frustrated with me going on because he's struggling to cope too with the worry.

@lamby12 Don't worry, you can always talk on here. It's good to get your thoughts out there and to people who understand. I completely understand that fear of going to the toilet and seeing red. Hopefully it's nothing and like others have said you're just more sensitive to bleed atm. As I would think it would have progressed more by now if it was something. Obviously I'm no expert but that's my thought. Try and distract yourself with a comedy or a book if you can. Or go on a walk. Xx

Oh, thank you @vitaminb33, that link is great!
We'll be shelling out for NIPT, especially since my risk has doubled in the 4 years since I had my DS as I'm now apparently ancient in childbearing terms :/

If I wasn't 40 min from emergency gynae, I'd be camped out there for reassurance scans I think as well. Buggering anxiety can do one.

Thank you @Pancakes7 I keep reminding myself with my miscarriage it went from spotting to unmistakable heavy bleeding within the same day, so this is different which I am trying to take some comfort in. But I also know ladies can start a miscarriage with a slow profession of bleeding, it's so dangerous reading lots of different stories online.

I'm going to just try and get on with things as much as possible today/tomorrow and hope the worst doesn't happen. Monday I am working from home which will probably be more difficult to keep distracted on my own as it's a very self managed role, but I just need to force myself to do tasks to make the time pass. Hopefully nothing progresses of course.

There's just no knowing is there. Now I am 8 weeks the chance of miscarriage after seeing heartbeat is so small, I really hope I am not so unlucky. x

@lamby12 Good idea to keep busy. Get some chores done maybe or play with DD. When working from home put the radio on to keep your mind from wandering. ❤️

@lamby12 Also no more googling! You're banned! lol x

Hope you're ok @lamby12 and that Tuesday comes quickly for you.

No problem @Cafeaulait27 @IJustPeedInTheMaintenanceBay! Yeah I have such mixed feelings about more private scans, I swore I wouldn't get another after last time was so stressful but I still don't have my dating scan appointment so I'm considering it again 🤦‍♀️

Hope you're doing okay @lamby12 ❤️

Also I feel like I'm going mad but my nausea has been much much worse the last two days (at 11 weeks)? I thought it was supposed to ease off 😭

Thank you ladies. Yes @vitaminb33 I'm
So torn about private scans too. In the end I'm glad I cancelled today's, as I now have one at EPU on Tuesday which feels more like the place to be if there's a problem.

I don't seem to have carried with spotting, really hoping the spotting has stopped/stopping now as nothing yet today but I daren't breathe yet.

I've been so sick yesterday evening and this morning, full blown terrible nausea and dry wretching over the toilet. Just managed some toast. I'm hoping this is all good meaning things are still progressing despite the spotting.

I'm so glad to hear it's stopped @lamby12 and the nausea seems like a good sign! I agree a EPU scan is the ideal option. Not long until Tuesday.

@lamby12 glad to hear you’ve stopped bleeding!

I do feel now that scans before 12 weeks just cause me further anxiety, and it’s best just to wait. But agree if you’ve had bleeding EPU is best place to be xx

Oh my God ladies being pregnant and having a cold and looking after a toddler and working is bit s*. Sorry to whinge but I feel so rubbish today. We've all caught this awful cold and so I've got to go to work tomorrow feeling rubbish and my poor mum will have to look after DS even though she feels rubbish too. I'm hoping this is the worst of it but I feel like I just can't stop blowing my nose. Really excited though that I'm so close to my scan now and I can't wait to see baby and I feel like I can start enjoying the pregnancy more and telling people once I get the screening letter. ❤️

@lamby12 i'm glad the bleeding has stopped. Not long till Tuesday and I'm sure all will be okay. ❤️

Hi everyone!! Just hoping I can join after popping over from the ttc thread. I got my bfp last week after a mc in Dec . Trying to stay positive and taking each day at a time. I hope your all progressing good and look forward to scaring stories with you x