Pregnancy after loss - Autumn babies 2021 - Thread 2

[Pancakes7]

Hi All,

I thought I'd start a new thread before we fill the other one.

@Bellabubble
@Firevie
@PumpkinEverything
@MrsF111
@MrsTD88
@Strawberry08
@imisscoffee
@Greenrubber
@vitaminb33
@Smurf123
@NorthernGirl1991
@bookwitch13
@JRH4622

Hopefully I've tagged everyone!

@Garman You must be exhausted - hope you manage to get a good night's sleep. I've been on progesterone since my bfp, but don't fully understand what it does I recommend inserting anally, as it's really messy vaginally.

Oh @Garman that's brilliant news! ❤️🎉 such a horrible wait, I hope you can get some rest now

@PumpkinEverything I told him about a week and a half ago as I was starting to feel nauseous and can't hide that because it makes me so miserable, but had already started bleeding so thought it was another mc. He said he absolutely understood why I hadn't said anything, he would've done the same. At that time we then agreed we wouldn't talk about it again until today's scan and either way we were done with ttc if this doesn't work out.

After the mmc he doesn't want to think about it or get attached this time (again we're very similar!), but thankfully this means he doesn't want to tell anyone, usually he's telling his family and randomers months before I would.

@marplemead oh this stuff sounds like a joy! 🙈

I’m glad to hear @Garman I completely understand your reasons for not wanting to, but glad that he was there to provide support had you wanted to speak about it the last few days, and that he was there to help today had it not been good news.

@garman congratulations!! So pleased for you, the progesterone is just to boost your natural hormones to support the pregnancy...its normal to be on it from the start (like me) or just to give you a boost! Make sure you buy decent panty liners!

Well he wasn't there as partners aren't allowed in due to covid, but that was fine with me I don't mind being on my own in there for these appointments, and he's our only childcare if I'm not there without having to tell his mother which we have no intention of doing any time soon!

I came home and briefly messed with him that it was twins which was what the sonographer first thought when she saw 2 shadows/sacs 😂

@Garman my partner is the same...its just their way of coping! Xx

@Garman wonderful news, I bet you're exhausted after the wait!

Who was it who had pgp in their last pregnancy too? I can't remember. I have woken up with pain down there just like my pgp last time. I'm so scared of being in pain like that again. Especially this early on!! And with a 22 month old to look after 🙈 last time it didn't start till about 25 weeks I think.

@Garman so pleased to hear your scan was a good outcome. I was thinking about you. You must be relived somewhat.
I think the progesterone is to boost your natural progesterone and often given if you have early bleeding. I asked the private consultant we were seeing about ivf if I should take progesterone after my BFP and she said there is no benefit if you aren't bleeding. She explained that the reason you have it in ivf is that when they take the eggs out natural progesterone drops and so they give it to get you back up to a good level. If you have bleeding this can lower progesterone too so they often give it then too. Hope that's useful, I'm not actually on it as I haven't had any bleeding. Feeling a bit nervy when I read that others are, thinking should I have, as she was happy to prescribe it but was clear there was no medical reason for me... so I've gone with trusting her. Fingers crossed.

Me and OH have been the same not talking about it until the scan on Friday which is 6 weeks. I have to keep diverting my brain now we're getting so close.

OH doesn't like talking about it anyway, we had a little spat the other night because I was going on about my worries and he was ignoring me which I then pointed out. He got a bit snippy but then calmed down and explained he's trying to shut it out because if he starts thinking about it he will loose it (with upset and worry). He's usually so quiet and calm which I often interpret as not bothered, but I don't think that's the case. When I was having my last miscarriage he was silent whilst I was wailing and crying then he randomly the next day sobbed uncontrollably which I've never seen before. It's difficult for the men in a way we probably don't understand fully!

I cannot deal with all these ups and downs. As mentioned, I’m starting to get a bit jittery about the whole thing, lack of symptoms making me panicky and convincing myself it’ll be bad news next week. However, a girl in work rang me this morning to tell me she’s 6 weeks pregnant and now I am absolutely bursting! Because I’ve been at home for the last year she doesn’t know about my MMC, nor this pregnancy, and this is her first baby too so she was telling me about things being weird and how she saw the doctor but now won’t do anything until 12 weeks so she’s booked a private scan for next week (same place I went to) and talking about cutting down on caffeine etc. And I’m sitting here like oh wow, really, as if I didn’t know these things as why would a non pregnant woman know that 😂😂 and I so so badly wanted to tell her about my sad and happy news, but I don’t want to steal her thunder at all, or worry her by mentioning my MMC, so I was just quiet. We now both have scans on the same day (different places) so if we both get good news I think I’ll tell her mine then too! I think it’s just given me a little excited boost this morning!

@Pancakes7 that was me! I'm sorry to hear it's turning up for you. For me one of the first signs of pregnancy is my tailbone starting to hurt, and for this and the last pregnancy I've felt like my pelvic bones/hips have been sore reaaaallly early on. I'm definitely scared too, but I've spoken to a lot of people who've had PGP in subsequent pregnancies and sometimes it is worse but sometimes it sort of appears early but stays at a similar level throughout.

I think managing it is important, the physiotherapists I saw all said about strengthening glute/pelvic floor/core muscles to support your pelvis to stop it getting worse. I found this online program called Mommastrong which is really good for pregnancy safe/postpartum exercise and they've even recently released a whole program focusing on PGP. I'm usually pretty religious with keeping to doing it everyday (especially glute exercises) but I've been awful since I found out I was pregnant this time, it's like I feel like exercising to prevent PGP is jinxing the pregnancy 🤦‍♀️ I really need to start again.

I 100% recommend taking a look at Mommastrong because I do like the trainer and all the exercises are exactly what the physiotherapists told me to use, just in an easier format

@Pancakes7 & @vitaminb33

I have it also! I had it at the end of my last pregnancy but only after sex for some weird reason
It's so achy isn't it! And I agree it's shit when it's happening so early on
All that relaxing hormone must be a good thing tho lol

@vitaminb33 Ooh thank you! I will definitely look at that. I was Googling exercises today. I was so far along last time by the time I was the physio the main thing she could do was give me crutches. I got really down not being able to go anywhere as it was too painful to walk anywhere. I really hope it's not as bad this time. The pains gone for now. But I definitely need to get doing preventative exercises.

I'm feeling really rough today. Feeling sick and headache. I'm currently letting my DS play on the iPad which I don't normally. While I lay on the sofa. I just need the peace and quiet.

I had PGP too in my pregnancy with DC. Thanks @vitaminb33 I will also look that up if I get that far (only 5.5 weeks at the moment!) not thinking that far ahead.

I'm suddenly feeling really rough, and my cramps have picked back up again. I'm hoping that's a good thing because I'm finally feeling like I've got some symptoms and fancying certain foods but feeling iffy at the thought of others. Hope this is a good sign.

Sorry if this is a tmi question about discharge... has anyone else had a sudden increase in watery discharge?! I have today and it's making me worry because I always get that before my period, like when bleeding is on the way I get lots of fluid first. There's always something to worry about isn't there?!

Also has anyone else been really cold?! I've been freezing for about a week, as I'm I've got about 6 layers on all day as if I'm going hiking but I'm in the house with the heating on! Spending evenings under a blanket and then suddenly at bedtime I go all hot and get sweaty and dizzy hot after being freezing all day!!!!

@lamby12

My discharge changes all the time so I wouldn't worry about it

@lamby12 I've had lots of watery discharge too, I constantly worry that I'm bleeding or my waters are trickling (when they went last time, I had two big floods but the three weeks after they were constantly trickling) and trying to reassure myself that it is incredibly unlikely to happen again.

@PumpkinEverything it's so hard keeping quiet! There's a woman at work who is 22 weeks along, she only announced a couple of weeks ago and everyone has been so lovely checking in on me after what happened with Frank, she actually told me first because she didn't want to upset me (I told her I was pregnant then) and everytime her pregnancy comes up in conversation, everyone looks at me for a reaction. I just want to shout "it's ok guys I'm pregnant too! 😂" but I don't want to share just yet.

Hope you feel better soon @Pancakes7. Looking after toddlers at this stage is relentless.

New craving today- sugar. Just pure sugar. I could literally just eat it out of the jar but I'm eating the kid's starburst and haribo instead and drinking sugary tea. I don't even like sweets. Great job trying to stave off gestational diabetes 🙄

That’s how I felt today @imisscoffee 😂 that’s really nice people have been checking in on you in work though, and that she told you first. Hopefully not much longer and you can share too so people know 😊 do you have any thoughts as to when you’ll tell work?
Can’t believe you’re craving pure sugar 😂😂 hopefully that one disappears soon! I’ve actually really took a fancy to pineapple and kiwi! I bought pineapple two weeks or so ago just on a whim and now keep buying it; and the kiwi is so good with it too. Don’t worry though, still eating plenty of chocolate 🙃

@imisscoffee pure sugar is good one! I watched Call the Midwife the other day and a lady craved coal! Eek
@PumpkinEverything ooh pineapple and kiwi is lush! Lucky one!
I'm still loving salt and vinegar crisps, not sure its a craving or just helps with nausea!

@PumpkinEverything I'm not sure yet, when we return after Easter hols I'll be 13 weeks. Part of me wants to announce after the scan and treat it as all my other pregnancies, part of me wants to wait until after 17 weeks because that's when Frank died. Which doesn't make any logical sense. Plus I'm showing now so by 17 weeks it'll be pretty obvious! We're telling the kids after the scan. They ask me how I'm feeling every day now and expect me to feel sick so it'll be better telling them why.

Google tells me sugar cravings can be a sign of early gestational diabetes 😟 hopefully I'm just craving it because I'm knackered, and didn't have any lunch today because the microwave at work was broken and I didn't fancy cold soup. I'll hopefully get a GTT booked while I'm at the hospital for my scan.

Just really loving how tropical it is @JRH4622 😁 going to get some bananas with the shopping tomorrow to have with it as well.

@imisscoffee I get your logic. I think that mark is probably just the next stage for you after the 12 week scan before the 20 week one and you want to get past it. It’ll be nice for your kids to know though 😊 I don’t really want to tell everyone until after 20 weeks, but I’ve been thinking about it and I’ll tell my manager (think I need to do that before 15 weeks) and the girl who I work closely with, and then what’s the point of not telling the rest of the team as they’d find out anyway if something was to go wrong as I’d need time off? They all knew last time as I told my manager he could tell them as I wanted to be open and honest about it all (I just waited a week or two so I could process it myself first)

@imisscoffee Craving sugar is a sign of a girl they say? Old wives tale I know. But with DS I craved salt so much. So you never know!!

@lamby12 I'm sorry you also had pgp. It's awful isn't it. I keep reminding myself it'll be worth it.

DH was coming home on time to do bath and bed as I feel so ill. But stuck on a call and no sign of him yet... I start DS bath at quarter past.... eugh. Much harder being pregnant this time with a toddler to look after 🙈

I craved salt on my first and he was a boy, but I don't think I craved it as much on my second and he was a boy too so who knows 😂

I had thought my indigestion and low level constant nausea was from stress the last 2 weeks, turns out it wasn't, still really feeling it today. It's soul destroying, so difficult to function and look after dc like this. And my husband is working late tonight 😭

I've usually struggled on with the nausea in previous pregnancies but I'm going to mention it this time to gp, but that appt won't be for about a week or 10 days at least so will have to struggle on til then... Through midterm break in lockdown 😭

@Pancakes7 I'm convinced it's a girl. My boy pregnancies have been constant hunger and cravings for salty, fatty food. With DS I craved Gregg's sausage rolls and would eat them every day 🤮 this time it's been all sweet cravings and aversions. I love coffee (hence the username!) and got a manual espresso bar for my 30th last year, but it's gathering dust at the moment despite forking out for the best decaf beans I could find. Usually I need a coffee to function and have a flat white each morning, but it's been swapped for sugary tea. DH can't steam milk to save his life so he's devastated 😂

@PumpkinEverything that sounds like a good plan, then you'll have support in place but without everyone knowing your business.

@imisscoffee I am not craving sugar this time but tbh I think it'll be another boy. DH thinks it'll be a girl. At least only 7 weeks till we can find out! I'm really hoping I stop feeling so rough and the pgp doesn't set in. I don't want to feel like this at work.

@lamby12 Yes I've been getting cold too! I was always a cold person. Then once I was pregnant with my DS I've changed to being really hot ever since (like DH) But recently especially at home I'm really cold.