September 2020 7 - babies are arriving!

[sianyflewog]

Just making this ready xx

Oh my goodness @Sunshinexx95. Are you all ok now?? That’s awful, I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I have to say it’s such a scary time for all of us to be having newborns . Really hope you’re all better now x

@CookieBlue

Well my daughter still has a dry cough and stuffy nose. Me and my mum are alright but I'm actually mentally tired. I wake up in the middle of night to have my cries because I feel so shaken still. I think I'm still in shock.. thankfully my mum is supporting me and she is with me every second of the day and taking care of my baby girl too. Without her I wouldn't last very long.. sometimes I feel so disconnected with my daughter and the doctor told me it is normal to experience that after such a trauma...

Thank you for asking 🙏 everyone needs to take care of themselves and their newborn. We can't really do much about the virus all we can do is be careful. 🙏

Baby Jacob arrived at 10am this morning weighing 8lb5 after long horrible labour. I feel like I'm in a body that's not mine. Labour is the most undignified thing ever far too many people have had their hands up my bits the last couple of days 🤣 i coughed earlier and thought my downstairs was going to tear 🤣
100% worth it though. Can't believe i have a baby.

@Sunshinexx95 I'm so sorry to hear that, glad that it got picked up though and you got her checked out xx

@MooseWL congratulations!! Hope you get some rest tonight and recover!

@Sunshinexx95 I hope you are ok, sounds like an awful time but I really hope things are much better now. So glad you've your mum helping you. Thinking of u xx

@MooseWL whoooop congrats!!! It is so worth it!!! Yep I feel like I'm in someone else's body too!! Getting so fed up wearing pad now for almost 3 weeks!! I don't have much bleeding but there's a bit everyday, when does it stop?!! Enjoy this special time xx

Congrats @MooseWL

@Sunshinexx95 such a tough experience for you, wishing you and baby girl a speedy recover so you can enjoy time together

Huge congratulations @MooseWL I hope you're able to get some rest tonight!

Sorry you've had such a scary time @Sunshinexx95 I hope you and baby are feeling much better xx

@Sunshinexx95 so sorry to hear your experience over the last few weeks. I hope you and your daughter and mother make speedy recovery and you can start to enjoy being a Mummy xx

@ShiningStarz 3.5 weeks post section and just starting to not use pads for the bleeding but there is still a little bit but not enough for a pad if that makes sense!

Congratulations @MooseWL sounds like a really long tough labour, thank god it's all over with now and you can start to recover and enjoy your baby xx

@Sunshinexx95 Sending you lots of love! It's worrying enough having a newborn let alone everything else on top! You are strong and your little one is lucky to have you!!

@MooseWL Massive congratulations! Such wonderful news!! Yes, it's not the most pleasant experience is it?! My husband won't talk about it and what he saw, just tells me how proud he was. He also said he struggled because he couldn't help me with the pain...I reassured him being there was more than enough and his support was all I needed!! So happy for you, enjoy baby Jacob!!

Thanks all. Survived our first night, he was very good and we actually got some sleep, he's been very chilled so far. So much meconium already 🤢

Honestly feel like I'll never be able to sit down comfortably again, i didn't even have any perineal tearing so can't imagine how bad that feels. Good grief, please tell me it gets less sore 😂

@MooseWL Glad you had a good first night :) I had to be cut then stitched up...so sore and coughing is so scary! Just feels really bruised and swollen...I don't dare look!! I hope I feel better soon...I must look so funny when I try sit down/walk etc!

Congratulations @MooseWL! Lovely news. Hope you are feeling more normal again soon.

So sorry to hear you’ve had such a rough time of it @Sunshinexx95. Hope you are all feeling better soon.

I’ve got to have a covid swab this afternoon as my induction is planned for Friday. Not looking forward to it I must say. Still hoping she comes spontaneously before then but no movement yet. I think she must just want to be an October baby! 😆

Can I ask you ladies a question about your OHs and paternity leave - are they all taking or intending to take 2 weeks pat leave?

My DH says he is but then this morning said he will still need to do some work each day and be contactable throughout. This doesn't sound like pat leave to me!! We got into a bit of a disagreement about it as I said it should be ring fenced family time for us, statutory right and all that, work shouldn't expect him to work during his pat leave and he shouldn't do any then either. Then he jumped down my throat saying I don't understand and don't get it.

I don't understand what there is to get - if you're on leave, you're on leave. It's not like he has a 'world is going to end' job or even a key worker job, it's sales. He sits at a desk all day and makes a couple of phonecalls.

It's pissed me off that he is prioritising his job over much wanted baby due any day....and he seems to have changed his tune since we talked months back about sharing childcare mutually and equally etc.

Apologies if this isn't the right place to ask about this, just feeling disheartened and overly emotional! 40+3 and no signs of baby yet which is also disheartening.

Thanks @HugeAgeGap I'm 3 weeks thurs and I'm going without today!! Hopefully no leaks! Was nothing at all last night!

@Margo34 my DH is taking two weeks. I don’t think there is any obligation on him to be contactable throughout although I suspect they may next him if they are in an absolute pickle and he’s the only person who knows the answer. I think it is supposed to be ‘leave’ though- as in he shouldnt be having to work through it, so I think you are justified in being a bit about it. I don’t know how it works normally as DH is civil service so he gets the two weeks on normal pay. Is paternity usually paid a statutory amount? Maybe your DH’s work have told him he can have full pay if he’s contactable or something? In which case he’s probably not actually getting true paternity? Thats just a total guess though.

I know my DH can’t bloody wait for his two weeks “off” (LOL). He’s been so bloody impatient about the baby coming so he can be off that I now find it hilarious that she’s 9 days late 😂

@Margo34 my partner did some work while on paternity but said it was so he could take the time back and have shorter days when he goes back, he finished an hour early yesterday and said hes going to work from home on Friday so looks like it was worth it. He's in the forces.

Congratulations @MooseWL!

@Sunshinexx95 I hope you all start feeling better soon. This virus is so worrying. It's good you have support whilst you're processing what's happened. Make sure you take time to process what's happened too when you feel able.

@Margo34 paternity leave should be a complete break from work. Does your DH struggle to switch off when he takes annual leave too? Hopefully once your little one arrives he'll be so besotted he won't think about trying to work.

I went for my 10 day midwife check last week and my stitches haven't healed as they should. I've been put on a second round of antibiotics and the midwife mentioned the possibility of sepsis (worst case scenario). As I couldn't sit on the chair (I can only sit on my doughnut cushion at home) I started feeling faint and tearful. Luckily the clinic is very close to my house so I got back and then got very upset. I just want to feel better now. My DH has been very supportive but I wish I'd been able to go out whilst he was on paternity leave. Breastfeeding is going really well so I'm holding on to that as my positive but I'm nervous about my next midwife appointment on Thursday. I hope she'll check me and give me good news but I can't help worrying that I'll need more intervention.

@liquoricecravings yes he struggles to switch off and lockdown made it worse tbh because he doesn't have the commute at the moment to define his working day. He gets up at 8 and by 8.05 has already snapped at me that "I'm working!" and all I did was ask if he wanted breakfast and a cuppa whilst he was sat in front of the TV 🙄

@OrDis he's getting Pat pay in line with his company policy which works out more than statutory pat pay. Its not like he's the only person working for his company, his colleague took pat leave a few months ago and actually took it as face value, as leave from work. I remember because DH picked up some of his workload at the time to cover his absence and moaned about it but did it anyway without contacting him so I don't think it's unreasonable that he should be able to do the same.

@Roxy8203 that's an interesting idea, taking time in lieu later down the line to compensate being contactable and bit of work during pat leave. Not sure he'd go for it (or he might say he would but then not actually follow through later on). I'll ask him.

I feel like turning around and saying 'here you go, have the baby while I pop in to work for a few hours this afternoon because they can't possibly do xyz without me' if he does any work during pat leave, see what he says to that. Don't think I will though.

Congratulations @MooseWL such wonderful news!
So sorry you had to go through this @Sunshinexx95 I wish you both a speedy recovery and one day this will be a just distant memory

@MooseWL congrats!!! Hope you're feeling as ok as can be. Xx

Thanks all. Jacob has been a boob monster today! Does anyone know if you can have baths with stitches (i had stitches in my labia) or is it showers only until they heal? I have awful piles from pushing and would love a bath to soothe them!

@margo34 we had a situation where my partner works for his dad, so his dad is covering his shifts during pat leave (normally he's semi retired so he'll be working the full 2 weeks) and my partner said his dad would probably ring him a lot about work stuff and i felt annoyed too think it's a reasonable reaction as i think this is important family time. Luckily my partner is besotted now the baby is here and his dad has been good so far at not calling. But i understand that it's frustrating. Is your partner excited about the baby?

Wondering if things might finally be kicking off here- been up since 4:30 with waves of pain which I think are contractions although all the pain is in my lower back. It’s definitely waves though- currently about every 8 mins but only lasting 30 seconds. Hoping this is the beginning!