Dec19/Jan20 IVF Graduates - Thread 2

[Chooklass]

New thread for us all to keep in touch. Think we're all nearing the end of the first trimester or dipping our toes into the second ... how far we've come since the days of agonising over stims!

Link to old thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/birth_clubs/3812203-Dec19-Jan20-IVF-Graduates

Thanks @october2020 that is very reassuring, it will help me through the week! :) Will do, luckily I do have the option even if it was an impulse buy at 5:15this morning I checked the return options haha.

Anyone else is sleeping a lot lately? WE also went for a long walk on Sunday almost 3hours, then I fell asleep at 7pm (!) and I was struggling to get up at 8am the next morning, it was very unlike me. Plus nowadays I am pretty much always sleepy by the time I finish work around 6pm... It started around 2weeks ago. Could be just pregnancy or maybe anaemia? Probably should mention it next week just in case.

@Lily999 yes sleeping loads again - especially after a walk. Only walked about 5miles on saturday and slept when I got home for about 4 hours!!!

I constantly knackered too! I’m in bed by 9 most nights and I’m tired all through the day. Hard work creating a human!

Can’t remember who asked about the consultant approach with IVF. Apparently with my trust at least they allow you an induction at 40 weeks rather than waiting the +2 weeks due to IVF dates being spot on / IVF mums being a ‘little more anxious’ due to the journey we have been through. Too early to know if I will want to take them up on it, but interesting to know there is the option!

Congratulations @October2020, really pleased everything went well, and you got to see her flipping about in there. 😂 @Chooklass did you say yours was tomorrow? Or that it's your halfway point?

Enjoying all the love for the Fiat 500s! @Lily999 absolutely get it, my car is my pride and joy. That's why I referred to it earlier as 'my car'. We only have one between us but I chose it and commuted in it for four years, with DH on the train. So I'm very sentimental about seeing it go....only my own child could make me part ways 😉

That's interesting about the induction @justkeeprunning5 - and you are London too right? Induction sounds awful so I'm hoping I don't need to use that option but at 40+1 I might be so uncomfortable that I decide it's a great idea!

I have a question, is anyone considering a doula? My first thought on learning about the idea (never heard of them six months ago) was they are way too expensive and it would be an indulgence. But then reading all about what they do (admittedly all on a website promoting them!!) I was quite taken-in by all the stats about shorter labours, etc. All in the mind no doubt but interesting...

Also @Lily999 on the reassurance point, my GP listened to the heartbeat a few weeks ago when I'd started to get really worried (about weight loss in my case) so you might not need to go to far to get the reassurance. Both options better than a home Doppler anyway 🙃

Scan on Thurs @Wimbledon1, but today I'm 20 weeks 😍😍😍! I was excited to see what vegetable it is on the ovia app this morning ... had to google what a 'Belgian endive' is though 😂🥬

@Wimbledon1 right back at the very beginning (when we assumed we would get pregnant naturally! Ha!), we met with a doula - I have various weird anxieties, particularly medical stuff, and we wanted to be reassured that there would be support through birth. She was BRILLIANT - we absolutely adored her and I could completely see why people rave about them.

We actually haven't talked about it since as IVF forced me to get over a load of my issues and my pregnancy/birth is going to be so micromanaged anyway I feel like she might be one person too many. But I was SUPER impressed with her.

You can get doulas who support after birth as well, with breastfeeding etc through the first days/weeks. That is an option we possibly will consider as we have no family nearby.

@Wimbledon1 not something that I plan to use (I’m saying that now, I’m aware there is a long way to go) but interesting that it is offered. We are a London borough.

Will they allow a doula into the labour room if there are already restrictions on partners attending due to CV? Obviously hope that the rules would have changed by then but something to consider. @October2020 it would be great to have that support post birth too.

@October2020 so glad everything went well with the scan.

@Wimbledon1 I had a phone call from the study people today asking about symptoms and my general health and previous pregnancy and miscarriage. She said I prob wouldn’t hear from them again unless they had follow up questions but they have permission to access my medical info related to this pregnancy. I think I had it right at the start - probably from one of the kids on the school ski trip to northern Italy who were not told to stay at home after they returned. Ah well.

I know we’re all at slightly different point but I was reading on one website that at 21 weeks the babyb practices eating using the amniotic fluid but that their taste buds have formed. It said that the amniotic fluid changes constantly depending on what the mum has eaten and studies have shown that if mum eats a lot of something from this point then the child often goes on - at least initially to show a preference for those foods. I found it fascinating. The idea that they get a small taste of what we’re eating. Obviously I imagine it is somewhat diluted. Just wondering what I now need to eat lots of 😁.

Has anyone else realised how cool it would be to have a baby born on 10/10/2020!

Excellent point about the doulas not being allowed into the hospital you've made there @justkeeprunning5 Silly me! 🙈 Yes that's probably not a good investment - although I also like the post birth and breastfeeding support option as likewise our family are hundreds of miles away. Will keep investigating.

@DobbieFreeElf I had NOT spotted that! But that would be cool. That's one day after my due date so chances are decent...ooh!

Well thank you for doing the study and opening up your records @Littlelot. I've been keeping an eye (sure we all have) on the emerging evidence and it's only by people agreeing to be monitored like that that anyone else will really get a picture, so 👍🏻👍🏻

@dobbiefreeelf my EDD is 20.10.20 :)

@Littlelot I heard about this too! Apparently it's good to eat a variety of food so that the baby gets used to it and does not become a fussy eater! I saw it a YouTube documentary about baby in the womb development.

Forgot who mentioned it but I watched No more boys and girls documentary and found it really interesting!

@October2020 congratulations on your scan! It's such a relief isn't it!

I started having emotional wobbles, being hormonal I guess, lots of silly things upset me but also lots of silly things make me laugh. I sleep a lot as well.

@Wimbledon1 in my experience the NHS health visitors get a lot of flack but they are there to help. I found the people who complained the most about them were the ones who didn’t like their advice and thought they knew better. Also you are having a lot of interaction with them in the very early weeks when you’re just so fricking tired everyone rubs you up the wrong way! Our HV who was the breastfeeding lady I nicknamed “knitted nipple” after she cane round to my house with a knitted nipple to try and teach me to get DS to latch better and stop me using the nipple shields. I was so tired and pissed off but eventually when I listened and had a bit more patients I followed her advice and it worked!

I made a point of going to the weekly weigh in at the local child centre mostly to get out of the house but to also build a rapport with those ladies and ask them any little questions that I had during the week. If I had waited until I was at my wits end I think I would have had a different opinion.

That said, who knows what support will be available in October, hopefully something that resembles “normal”!

@Viletta the documentary was me. I was unsure if the name might put people off but it really made me think about how we talk to children from a young age and the influence we have. I have a 7yr old ds so have really made an effort to talk about emotions with him and to be honest I think with the pressures of lock down a child of his age I think it’s vital. Luckily DH is very on board and we share domestic tasks etc anyway so doing our best. It’ll be interesting though having a girl now to see if she is treated the same. My nieces all request pink tat for presents at Xmas and birthdays (very much the stereotypical) and you can see the pain on DHs face as he purchases these gifts 😂.

@Chooklass hope all goes well today!

Scan all fine! 😍😍😍 Growing an entirely average child. Anterior placenta, surprisingly!! Makes sense when I think about it, as although I've felt movements they are all at the sides and pretty intermittent. Happy happy! 😃

Oh, that is great news @Chooklass I hope you managed to stop yourself from peeking at the gender and it wasn't too obvious!
Enjoy the pregnancy now with the weight lifted, do we have one scan left for this week, is it @Wimbledon1 tomorrow? Mine is on Tuesday sorry I am not sure who's next then @DobbieFreeElf and @justkeeprunning5?

Oh and forgot to say DH said we have to return the doppler unopened it arrived yesterday and we already initiated the return as I didn't trust myself, it is in his office haha! Good news is I started feeling little movements I am still not 100% sure as I am having beans with my breakfast at least 4times a week as recommended so it can be confusing with all the bubbles :D But I think that's it as I feel then around late morning and then just when I go to bed, but only started on Tuesday evening so will know more in a few days time.

Still no idea what the sex is! Was worried I'd see something but nope 👍. Great news about your movements @Lily999, and glad the doppler is going back. What are you going to treat yourself to instead? X

Thanks @Chooklass, when you started feeling movements did they already have a pattern or does it come later on?

I haven't ordered any books yet, but once the scan is done on Tuesday I will get a few of them already sitting in my Amazon wishlist so I can start soaking in the knowledge especially that the plan has always been that my mom would move in here for 6weeks once the baby comes, however she has autoimmune disease so she is shielded, we started to prepare ourselves for the scenario when we have no help that is a bit unnerving as he'll be our first one, but these days we just have to figure out how to manage as the virus keeps changing our plans.

Well done @Lily999. Great news about the movements too - I had one huge somersault type movement yesterday which must have been madam, so hopefully it won't be long for you either now to get some big ones! When is your scan?

I had an exciting day yesterday as a friend dropped round loads of baby clothes etc. Went through them and it suddenly started feeling very real!!

I've had the tiniest speck of brown blood today and am now really panicking really very tiny, only on a liner and nothing at all when I wipe. Definitely brown not red.

Rang midwife line and they said not to worry as might be because of the internal scan I had to check cervix length but to ring back if it continues/gets worse. I know brown = old and it really was no bigger than my little fingernail but still waaaaaah :(

Oh no @October2020, can understand that would be stressful. But literally everything I read about internal scans says you are likely to see spotting after, I'm sure that will be it. And the midwives are always so great; they wouldn't take any chances if there was a worry. So try not to 💪🏻
(Did you have to beg for the cervical length scan by the way or was it because of your complex pregnancy?) I really want that as my Mum had two second trimester miscarriages with incompetent cervix, but it's not really an NHS test.

@Chooklass - hurrah and congratulations on the completely normal little one. Hope it was a lovely experience seeing them again...I would be so stunned if I have an anterior placenta but we shall see tomorrow!

@Littlelot that programme does sound interesting, I think both DH and I would like it. The main motivator for him not finding out the gender (I have never minded) was that my mum would go nuts on either pink or blue stuff and we want to avoid that.

@Lily999 my mum is also shielding with an autoimmune disease (rheumatoid) and she's very worried about when she might get to meet baby if the rules stay very strict for them. It's a rubbish situation isn't it.
After someone's idea yesterday, I'm almost certainly thinking doula to help my early weeks although @DobbieFreeElf I definitely see this as on-top-of the NHS and local options not instead of. I'll be going to everything and taking up all offers! 😂

@Wimbledon1 didn't have to beg, I asked but I think consultant was on her way to suggesting it anyway. But I really think it would be worth asking for if you have a family history! It doesn't take up any of their time really, same scanner, same room, same appointment.... and if it is fine then there is literally nothing they need to do after either. Maybe start by asking your midwife?