July 2019 (thread 9): shame me about my bump, and I'll shame you about your complete lack of manners

[RooKangaroo]

Honestly, I go to catch up on the thread after a few days and you guys have filled it up! Love this chatty group.

How is everyone this morning?

Can I join? I'm 22+7 today, expecting a little girl😍.

It's been a very angsty post-recurrent miscarriage pregnancy, but everything seems to be going well. The anxiety wasn't helped by my anomaly scan at 19wks wrongly measuring the femur at the 6th percentile and being told 'oh! That's small. Err.. it just means they'll be short'! Me and DH are both giants. A private reassurance scan 2 days later put us at the 25th.

I think I started to feel her kick a few days ago - it's like a little twitch. Totally unlike what I thought it would feel like.

@BeckyButterfly that's frustrating. GAD and any kind of panic or anxiety is awful as I know from experience. You're doing so well to manage in pregnancy and off meds. Have you explained to them how you feel? It sounds like they're trying to take your health into account, but I'm guessing it might be easier for them to find cover for a few weeks rather than odd days? Either way, they need to listen and work with you

Welcome @SerenaOverjoyed congrats and yay to feeling movement it's lovely isn't it. I had a bit of a rocky road with years of infertility and a few IVF cycles so have found early pregnancy difficult too. Hopefully it's all plain sailing from here to our babies!

TMI but has anyone else has egg white discharge? Just been to the loo and had some which is odd! Was clear and didn't have any odour but just wondering if this is normal as up to now I've only had milky white discharge! Lovely topic!

@serenaoverjoyed we were in the same miscarriage thread last summer, so lovely to hear your news! Congratulations! My first feelings were like twitches too :) I’m 22.4 :)

@capybaras I’m told that’s normal and gets a bit more in second trimester there s band for it but can’t rememver it! So long as not discoloured or have a smell then it’s normal. I’ve got it too.

Thanks @Yukka I had a moment of panic as I always come across the mucus plug threads on the pregnancy board! I then rationalised and as you said it's clear and not smelling so assumed it must be ok. Bodies are so weird in pregnancy!

@beckybutterfly just be careful with any reason given to be signed off - Im pretty sure there is a standard rule that if you’re signed off with ‘pregnancy related’ sickness within x many weeks of due date, then your maternity leave automatically starts... could leave you short for the actual period you want off when baby is here.

But if you’re not really ‘sick’ per se then don’t do it, it’s not fair for them to say that (it’s probably illegal) if anything thy should be asking if you want to speak to occupational health to assess if any alterations to work should be made due to your anxiety and no meds, not due to pregnancy.

@capybaras I’ve had it daily for the last few weeks too! X

@Capybaras I've had it daily since bfp ! Although I'd describe it more as a snot green that clear 😷

Thanks @Yukka. I spoke to my MW about it this morning and she mentioned the same thing. My boss already spoke to HR and they said that my maternity leave would kick in from 36 weeks so have to be in work then.

I spoke to my boss today and she was actually really nice. She just said she was worrying about me because of previous problems with pregnancies. I’ve said that I am definitely staying at work until the Easter hols then I’ll go from there.

I’ll remember to get the doctor to put anxiety rather than pregnancy related just in case though if I do need time off.

Glad to know it's normal! Any change and I panic! Is anyone going to try hypnobirthing? I downloaded the positive birth company pack when it was on offer and wondering when is a good time to start listening to it! Not sure if to leave it a bit closer to my due date!

@Capybaras I fancy giving it a go, at least some elements of it. I’ve read a book about it and doing some practice in my pregnancy yoga class and basically, start as soon as possible. You want to practice your breathing techniques and relaxation methods so that they become muscle memory for labour. Practice makes perfect 😊

Oh that's good to know @HchyScott I've been going to pregnancy yoga since I was 14 weeks and have really enjoyed the relaxing portion of it so hopefully that will help with the hypnobirthing. Want to try everything possible to go into this with a positive mindset seeing as up until last year just the talk of childbirth made me feel faint, so need t get over that quickly! Although I still don't love it when people decide to tell you how horrendous their labours were, it's like a competition for some
People of who had the worst experience!

@Capybaras oh I totally agree with you! I’m fascinated by pregnancy and childbirth, I’d really have loved to be a midwife but I’m so so squeamish I couldn’t. The books and yoga have made me feel so much more empowered and confident and actually a little excited compared to the outright fear and panic I had before getting pregnant and in the early days. I get really bad health anxiety too and the book has helped keep that at bay and make me feel positive. I have heard the most horrendous stories!! People love to share don’t they?! But now I focus on the good ones I’ve heard. A lady in my yoga group had her baby the night after our last class, naturally, 6 hours from first contraction to baby in her arms, all healthy and happy. Sign me up for that please lol!!

@Capybaras I’m with you on people feeling the need to tell you all about their “horrendous” experiences!
My mother-in-law is my favourite person to talk to about the birthing process since she’s had an emergency c-section with my husband then she had twins, one of which she gave birth to naturally and the other she needed the hoover thing (I can’t remember it’s actual name..) so she’s pretty much experienced it all and she always just says that you can handle anything and everything labour throws at you. She’s just so positive about it and never has a bad word to say. She is one tough cookie but her confidence makes me feel confident 🙂

@Capybaras I'm giving hypnobirthing a try. I was a little sceptical but I read Hollie De Cruz's book and it all just made sense! I need to start practicing the breathing techniques more regularly but I listen to the affirmations mp3 on my way to work and it's definitely helped me feel more calm and positive about birth. I've booked a one day course too in May - the DH has taken a bit of convincing have to say! He's quite blasé about anything to do with the birth and labour but I think deep down he is a bit freaked out (The Mothercare incident was the first time I've ever seen him mildly panicked!) Hoping the course will help both of us albeit in different ways!

I’m also in for hypnobirthing, reading the book and doing yoga and relaxation sessions at home. There’s an evening course I can join in may for 4 weeks which I’ll see. As I’m having an induction it could be a long haul. my acupuncturist is going to change treatment at 36w to try and start natural labour, or at least prepare me for induction. Basically I’m doing everything possible!

Also, I know I asked a little while ago about maternity bras. I have ordered a few from Debenhams which haven’t arrived yet but I also ordered one front Figleaves because I’ve gotten swimwear from there before and loved it (prior to pregnancy). The bra arrived today and I love it!

This is the one I ordered: www.figleaves.com/uk/figleaves-nursing-bralette-d-h-cup/FIG-010302.html?dwvar_FIG-010302_color=750029&cgid=maternity-and-nursing-lingerie#start=9

It’s reduced to £16.80 but has £4 delivery charge. It is a one you can use when nursing as well, the bio drops down. I ordered a 34H (I’m usually a 32G) and there is a bit of room to grow.
Just thought I’d share that with you all in case anyone else is having the same problems as me.

That should say the cup drops down. Not the bio...

I haven’t felt baby move since Wednesday night. I waited all day yesterday and felt no movement. Waited today and nothing so rang triage ( I’m 22 weeks) who said it can be normal at this stage, but now it’s been nearly 48 hours with no movement. I’m at work currently. I’ve been laid down on my side I’ve drank and ate sugary things and drank cold water and still nothing. What can I do 😩

I downloaded the positive birth company pack the other day when it was on offer too! Didn't really want to sign up to a full hypnobirthing course because of the cost and we're doing NCT already. Started watching it last night with DH. Need to start listening to the affirmations.

I've booked myself a private physio appointment for my PGP, not had my hospital appointment through yet and it's a group clinic so not sure how much use it will actually be. I've been in so much pain these last few days, it's making me cry with frustration! Not because of the pain (it is bad but doesn't bring me to tears) but because of my lack of independence. I couldn't even unload the dishwasher the other day. I've had a day off work today and planned to do loads of things like painting in the nursery and a shopping trip but I've just stayed at home doing nothing because of the pain. I wish I could take proper painkillers too!

Oh @AIDE2424, I'm so sorry, that must be so scary. I think I'd ring back and say it's been 48 hours now and you've tried all the usual things.

Was the movement generally regular beforehand? If so, I'd say that, so that you're not saying it's gone from occasional movement to nothing, but from regular movement to nothing.

Another port of call could be your local midwife/community midwife/children's centre. They have dopplers and could see you. Or your GP.

Sending hugs x

@RooKangaroo It seemed regular first thing in a morning last night at night when I was chilled out.

I’ll ring back and see what they say. Thankyou :)

@AIDE2424 definitely ring them again and just really push it with them. They tried to fob me off when I rang last Friday because I was only 21 weeks but you know your body and your baby. All you’re wanting is for them to check the heartbeat so it won’t take them long to do.

Hope you get somewhere with them @AIDE2424 as others have said you know you're body, and although I'm sure everything's ok, it's so worth it to get piece of mind from some monitoring.
Hope they take you seriously, and let us know how you get on.