August 2019: thread 5, 20 week scans, bumps and cravings

[ScotsBaby2]

Morning all.

Thread 5!!! Lots of boys on the list.

UnicornDust, 28th July, DC2
Bakingabean, 29th-31st July, DC1
IrishCypriot, 31st July
MrsRyan15, 1st August, DC1
CalmerComber, 1st August, DC2&3 💛💛
Curlywurlywoo, 2nd August, DC1
Cobblestones, 2nd August, DC1
Emma1224, 3rd August
Ninunina, 3rd August, DC3
Whoopsies, 3rd August, DC2
Sunshine1987, 4th August
EverythingNow, 4th August, DC4
Chocolate89, 4th August, DC2
MrsH1990, August 4th
Kariana, 4th August
Elmamadegatita, 4th August
Fuppy, 4th August, DC2
Jokie, 5th August
Schmexy, 6th August, DC1
CautiousOptimist, 6th August, DC3
bubblegumunicorn, 7th August DC1
Blueberry2018, 7th August
MrsM2017, 8th August
Stylix1981, 8th August
Floriday, 9th August, DC2
abw94 9th August DC1
Clairelee17, 11th August, DC1
Marajade12, 11th August
MummaGiles, 11th August, DC2
Dolleymix, 11th-13th, DC2
Pixietheginger, 12th August
Queenoffox. 12th August, DC3 💙
Rachyrach300, 12th August
Trimusical, 12th August
ABearandABump, 13th August, DC2
Foodie68, 13th August
Mightypinkdms, 14th August, DC3
Poppy012, 15th August, DC3
Keebo, 15th August
Moonchild23, 15th August
Rachellev, 16th August
2dreamadream, 16th August
Jelliestogether, 17th August
ss3ajb, 17th August
Chiatta, 17th August, DC1
Bananamonkey, 18th Aug, DC2
Scotsbaby2, 18th August, DC2
LauraJustMe, 19th August
RaindropRoses 21st August DC2
Loveshinealight, 21st August
Sacrecoeur0712 23.08.19 DC3 💖
Rubbingbutnotscared, 28th August, DC3&4
Moncwf, 26th August; DC2
OctoberGirl91, 23rd August, DC3
PinkLady89x, 29th August, DC1
Kcjoe, 29th August, DC2
IVEgottheDECAF, 30th August, dc5

Hello! I’m new to this thread, due on 19 Aug after a second go with IVF on a natural cycle. Had a growth scan yesterday and all measuring well apart from abdominal circumference being at the higher end of what they consider normal. They don’t seem too worried so I’m trying not to worry either. Just 2 weeks of work left and then we start on our big move from London to Scotland . Hopefully will get everything done before baby arrives!
Currently suffering insomnia and some anxiety over a “bump groping” incident a few days ago - it’s affected me really badly and I can’t shake off that “violated” feeling. Should I be venting about this on a different thread/board?
Anyway, exciting to find a space where everyone’s at a similar stage and going through the same things. Hope you’re all doing well - not long now .

@PhoebeBear I managed to find this thread again! (I saw your other post when I was hunting for it!)

@bubblegumunicorn thank you for that! 😊

@vikavika welcome and congratulations!

Very exciting about the move.. sounds like a very busy summer for you!

This is definitely a safe space for venting. Sorry that you had an unpleasant experience.. unwanted touching is not on

@vikavika vent away. I hope you are ok.

I'm a Scotland girl. Where are you moving to? Is it a work, family or lifestyle decision?

I'm due 18th August. Nearly due date buddies.

Just needed a bit of a vent - But I'm really struggling with work I've only been there for 6 weeks so basically have no rights. They have me working until 10pm then an hour and a half bus journey home. I've told them I'm not coping with it but they just said tough we need you. There is no allocation to take holiday so I’ve been told I will have 12 weeks holiday to take in 2020/21 but the holiday starts from July so that’s not great. My DH wants me to work until my due date and I am about ready to throw him out of the house because of his stupidity and selfishness and I’m starting to feel really alone with everything.

Ah @bubblegumunicorn you sound so down I hope you're ok. Can I say it doesn't matter how long you have been employed by them you absolutely have rights, you are pregnant. Holidays & sickness usually is employer dependent, but every employer is legally bound to keep you safe during pregnancy. Have you had a risk assessment? If not ask for one. They have to put reasonable adjustments in place to ensure you are safe or suspend you on full pay if they are unable to. You are also entitled to time off for antenatal appointments xx

The holiday thing sounds a bit weird as well - I think I would speak to citizens advice bureau or ACAS

Thanks for the welcome @ScotsBaby2 and @Kathryn19
We had a few friends over last weekend, one who lives far away and we only see once a year. I got a bit cornered when I was on my own in the kitchen and asked if he could feel my bump which was fine with me, but he then proceeded to feel my bump all over with hands stroking in all directions over and around it (like, underneath! who in their right mind thinks it's OK to feel underneath a pregnant woman's bump?!), and a particular ick one was over my bellybutton (bleurghh) I was really shocked and froze. The internal monologue in my head debated whether I was in the right for feeling that way, if I should stop it or just hope for it to end soon - I'm sure it went on for longer in my head than it did in reality. The person had actually made me feel uncomfortable all day up to that point, he kept touching me on the arm for no reason which made me flinch every time and it was all very out of character - it was as if suddenly being pregnant made me his property to look after and paw at. Anyway, I didn't really process it til that evening after everyone had left, and realised how violated I felt and how angry at myself for allowing it to happen. Have been replaying it in my head a lot over the last few days and just crying about it. Sorry, it must seem over the top, and I'm sure the hormones and insomnia aren't helping. DH and I spoke quite a bit about it last night and I'm feeling better today. I think we'll both be actively avoiding this "friend" in the future.

Also, I wish there would be more readily available mental health support during pregnancy. Seems like we are more vulnerable to weird behaviour from people and all the hormones, physical discomfort and just the magnitude of the life event makes it a no-brainer for mental health support to be offered as standard. Perhaps it is, and I'm just not aware?

Phew! Rant over.

@Spongeb0b Thank you I've had a bit of a cry to my doctor about it all this morning and feel much better for it he's given me a maybe fit note to strongly suggest work adjust my hours to make it easier for me. So I'm hoping it will make a differance!

@vikavika I'm not sure if this will help you but I've used talking changes in the past they are baised in Co Durham but are self referal and you can have online or over the phone appointments with them! They are fully trained in CBT and easy to get appointments with! I agree mental health is so important especially when pregnant I don't wait with it because that's when you can spiral in to depression I'm terrified I will get PND you need to be able to look after your mental health now so you can look after baby in a few weeks! If they can't help you I would 100% speak to your midwife or GP about it as they will help you and won't judge you at all (I was terrified I would be judged for having mental health problems when I got pregnant I haven't been at all) www.talkingchanges.org.uk/

Thank you @bubblegumunicorn I will definitely check it out.
I hope your work situation improves, really good that you've got the doctor's note so fingers crossed for you.

Hi everyone!

@bubblegumunicorn; I hope the doctor's letter helps. That sounds awful that you're working so late.

@vikavika: welcome to the thread! You're in good company here. That does not sound fun about the inappropriate touching. I'd definitely agree to avoiding them in future.

Anyone else being beaten up from the inside? The last few days I've had some really strong powerful movements.

@Jokie today was crazy! Whenever I was sitting down it was like she was kickboxing. Mad baby.

@jokie I swear this boy is having a morning rave in there today. I feel like he's trying to kick his way out. It's actually getting quite painful!

33 days till due date. Arrrrgh!

@vikavika - definitely avoid that person from now on. Not surprised he made you feel that uncomfortable.

I've hated that people seem to think it's ok to touch pregnant women. I've even had one colleague/friend try and kiss it. She's very much a "mummy" figure and from a different culture but it made me so uncomfortable. I didn't want to offend her so I sort of stood there in shock...! Oh and then there was the older lady on the bus who had a stoke without asking. I was trapped in the window seat so couldn't get away!

Hi ladies

Just a wee reminder that this time next week (7th July) we will close the Facebook group to new members. We already have babies!

Anyone who wishes to join, send me a pm and I'll give you the instructions. It's more complicated than it used to be :-(

How is everyone doing this weekend? I've been a hormonal, emotional mess and wondering how the hell I'm going to cope with a toddler all on my own while on mat leave and with a newborn. Eek.

@ScotsBaby2 I've sent you a PM re joining the FB group x

Also just to say I remember having the same panic when I was expecting DC2 - it's very natural but you will do just fine! I had a very tearful day last week thinking about losing the independence I've gained having two children in full time school - I'm delighted to be having this baby after such a long wait to conceive (4 years), but I had started to enjoy the freedom I'd gained and we can all be a bit anxious about change I think. Hang in there, we are getting towards the finish line!

Hi, I’m very late but is there any chance I can join. I’m 32 weeks with my first DC, a little boy

@Myhipsdolie of course. Welcome! How are you feeling?

@Bakingabean eugh I’m sorry to hear that - sounds like we both need to be more firm and politely tell these people to back off! I’m glad to hear others feel the same way and it’s not just me being over-sensitive. Hope all going well for you X

Welcome @Myhipsdolie. How are you doing?

I'm entering my last week at work and can't wait. Little one has been kicking me from the inside.

Hi @ScotsBaby2, I'm sending you a PM.

Hope it's not too late to join in. I'm due August 17th. I've been a longtime lurker, but for some reason I'm just now joining. Hello, everyone!

Hello @Otterlyme! How are you doing? Not long now
What number baby is this for you?

Hello @Kathryn19! I've been struggling with hyperemesis since the very beginning, so I have to admit I'm counting down the days until she's born. This will be my first baby, a girl. I'm very excited.

How are you getting on? Hope all is going well. x