July 2019 (thread 8): pram choices, 20-week scans, and the morning gag

[RooKangaroo]

New thread!

Sorry, don't know if someone else was planning to do this. Just noticed how close we were to being cut off on the last thread.

@BeckyButterfly I've only been certain I've been feeling movements since Friday. But now I know what it feels like I've definitely felt movements before then, I just didn't know what that it was baby. I'm 21 weeks today. And it's getting easier to recognise everyday

Thanks for your tips on the bags RooKangaroo and Squ1ggle*. Really helpful!

And congrats on a girl, RooKangaroo! 😍

I've also barely had any sleep and now I'm kind of feeling jet lagged. 🙃😕

@ForTheLoveOfDoughnuts thank you for the reassurance 😊 I’m sure it’ll be okay, it’s just hard not to worry.

Congratulations on the girl @RooKangaroo!

Good to know about the pacapods and changing bags in general! Haven't even thought about that yet!

It's so nice that the weather is so great - feels like summer already!

I'm still not feeling much movement at all and it's so worrying isn't it ?! 🙈 Even though you know it's still early ! I felt a definite little kick a few days ago but other than that no obvious kicks/jabs.
I do sometimes think it feels like he is 'rolling ' or something but it's so hard to know if it's actually real 🤔

I am loving this nice weather ! Been out without a jacket for the first time in ages ! Not having to worry when the toddler wips her shoes and socks off in the buggy lol

@BeckyButterfly the worry is never ending. Now I've felt her, when I don't for half a day I'm worried why I'm not! I just need to chill.

@ForTheLoveOfDoughnuts I wish it was that easy 😂

@ReginaPhalange, @Beckybutterfly, @fortheloveofdoughnuts this is weird as today I aslo felt nothing and driving home was planning to drop a post to ask you all. I've not had full one movements or anything yet but just weird twinges and things, but today nothing and I was a bit worried. But i'm only 18.2 and its my first, and I was non stop all day so baby is probably sleeping.

it's reminded me of the awful first 12 weeks, especially after having MC's where you're constantly symptom spotting, and if you think your symptoms have gone away then your just waiting for mc start. brings back memories and makes me feel sad :(

But got to stay positive. I' going to attempt a Yoga session at home on Amazon tonight, the sciatica was soooo much better after swimming on sunday so need to keep the movement going.

@Yukka sending hugs
Just about to go for my first pregancy yoga/hypnobirthing/relaxation class, hoping it’ll help with the back and hip pain I’ve had over the last 2 days!

I think we all have to keep telling ourselves that the chances of anything bad happening at this point are so so slim ! We're all (almost) half way there !

We'll drive ourselves mad the whole pregnancy even after the 20 week scans 😂

Thanks @HchyScott - hope the class is good. I'm doing hypnobirthing in May and bought a book to get be started

You're right @Regina and half the battle i think is because I had scans every 2 weeks with this one until 12 weeks, then nothing till 20 weeks. It feels like its been a long time. But I'll be on 4 week scans after that point. 20w deff feels like a major milestone and I have to trust they know what they're doing :)

Well, the american yoga lady's voice drove me mad, so I went for a soak in the bath instead! feeling better :)

My placenta is anterior so I've not felt much movement at all. Can't wait for it to get more regular. I'm 20 weeks now.

I went to an antenatal exercise course tonight, all about how to exercise in pregnancy and be fit and healthy ready for labour and a newborn. I've really been slacking between the exhaustion of the first trimester and then some PGP. But I might try to start running (slowly) again as I used to run loads before pregnancy. The instructor said we should be aiming for 150 minutes a week of moderate activity - I'm nowhere near that!

We also talked about posture and next week will cover pelvic floor exercises and nutrition. Tonight I've actually ordered an epi-no to do some pelvic floor exercises and then further on you can use it for perineum exercises and it reduces the risk of tearing. Not nice to think about but if I can do anything to reduce the likelihood then it sounds good to me.

Oh Yukka, sending you some serious hugs. It's still early days and there's no cause for concern. It'll come back! Mine took until 20 weeks to become a daily occurrence, and even now at 21 weeks there's no patten. But I know what you mean about the MC link. It's horrible. I had a reassurance scan at around 19 weeks because I was just so paranoid. Helped.... for about an hour! 🙈

I downed a glass of cold water today and that made the flutters and twinges come back with a vengeance! Guess someone didn't like the cold water.

thedust that's all really interesting info, thank you for sharing it! 😊

I've got a bit of PGP too, I think, but my referral to the NHS physio has got lost somehow so I need to get on with it under my own steam as I don't want to wait too long. If I walk a little daily it seems to be ok, almost like building up a tolerance, but if I've had a day at or two home then the next time I'm out it really hurts. Definitely nowhere near 150 minutes! And have to start on the pelvic floor - a v v timely reminder.

Thanks @Stargazydrifter. I found in the pool on sunday, lying on your back and kicking only to do lengths, makes you squeeze your pelvic floor and squeeze your stomach/core muscles, which works both the pelciv floor and treats the sciatica, but I don't have PGP so I don't know if it would help in the same way.

There's only one way to find out! I've been meaning to go to the pool for ages.

@StargazyDrifter it took ages for my physio referral letter to come through and even then it just said to ring then to arrange an appointment! (Which I still haven’t done...😂)

Also, feeling a little pissed off today because my friends have basically started leaving me out of everything since I fell pregnant. I overheard them talking about their weekend plans so they must all be doing something that I haven’t been invited to. I know I’m pregnant and can’t drink but I’ve never been a big drinker and often used to go out with them without touching a drop. It’s annoying how people assume you will be a different person now that you’re pregnant. I don’t know if anyone else has had similar experiences but it is making me feel a little lonely at the minute. My best friend doesn’t live too close to me so I don’t get to see her that often which is a shame because she is amazing. I also have the best family, in laws and husband so I’m hardly alone! Just feeling sorry for myself 😂

Sorry guys, I’ve done a lot of ranting the past couple of days!!

Aww BeckyButterfly I know exactly what you mean. They are just being a bit thoughtless and making silly assumptions, maybe.

I have psychotherapy sometimes at the hospital where I'll be having the baby, it's to do with an old issue made worse by pregnancy, but this evening's session we also touched on that very thing - the fact that conversations seem to have changed from what I think/do to various questions/advice about the baby. I'm always interested in people's advice, not that I necessarily agree with most of it, but it's a point of view. But I do sometimes feel a bit irritated when conversation is just that these days. We talked a bit about how between bad hypermesis and now the baby focus from everyone because the bump is visible it already feels like a long time since I was just me. It was just a quick observation, the lady said she hears that a lot and that people slowly recalibrate and find a new normal.

@BeckyButterfly, that's really frustrating. I hope it's just a one-off and not a new normal for them now.

I know these things can work both ways - those first in the group to have babies feel left out of non-Mum activities, and those last in the group feel left out of Mum activities.

We're now reaching the latter stage for my school group. I was one of the first to have a baby, but now more have babies than don't, and I try to be really careful not to talk about my daughter (and this pregnancy with my second) too much, as I know others who want babies soon but not right now feel left out about it.

It's such a big life change for people (like death, illness, relationship breakdown, etc.) and can really test friendships.

Have people seen there's now a November group!?!? It makes me feel properly pregnant when I see later months filling up and people getting their BFPs at the moment.

We touched upon that in our group last night because someone said they came along to meet new people. But equally, just because another person is also pregnant/a mum doesn't mean you're automatically going to be friends! But then your current friends think that's all you're interested in. It is interesting how your identity changes. That's why I regret giving up running a bit, that was always my 'me' time. I might start picking it back up though. It's so important to still keep your own interests. I know what you mean about people always starting conversations about the baby/pregnancy. On the one hand it's nice, but on the other hand I am more than just a pregnant woman! That's why I feel quite motivated at work at the moment I think, it's something I'm good at and enjoy outside of being a 'mum to be', my colleagues don't treat me that differently and I want to return to it. I've been planning my keeping in touch days already.

I'm sorry to hear that beckybutterfly - that's a bit thoughtless. I haven't really experienced that but then most of my friends are couples or friends with kids and I haven't been out with friends in years (I'm not kidding - aside from going to work, the first time I went out without my 3 yr old since she was born is when I've been to pregnancy yoga 😂)..I have some single friends and they just tend to come and visit for the weekend (I moved areas when I was pregnant last time). But I can totally understand the feeling of being left out. stargazydrifter - hopefully everyone will get over the excitement of a pregnant lady and start to resume normal conversation again soon. Are you still suffering with the hyperemesis?

Thank you guys 😊 it’s nice to hear other people’s experiences and stories. I know I’ll be okay even if they do distance themselves a bit because I have plenty of other people in my life but it doesn’t stop it from hurting.

I’ve come out in a huge rash which is really itchy! It started last night so I rang the docs this morning to get it checked but they said it’s probablt just allergies which I agree with if I’m honest. It just feels like when I’ve had allergic reactions to animal fur and grass before.

BeckyButterfly That’s horrible, I’ve noticed a lot of my friends do that too, but I’m only 20 so I suppose none of them really know what to do with babies.

Woke up this morning with terrible skin, dandruff and greasy hair. This baby better be worth it, he’s messing my whole body up the little monster!.

We’ve finally narrowed it down to three names, Arthur Damien, Edgar Stanley or Samuel Ridley. (All after directors due to DHs obsession)

Hate to say it but most people lose friends when they become parents. I'm going to say mostly younger mum's, mainly because their age group aren't having babies so they get left out of things and have different priorities

I've not got many friends tbh. Literally 2 or 3 that I could pick up the phone and I know they'd be here if I needed them. But even then I rarely see them .

I fell pregnant with my 1st at 22 and stopped getting invited to things . I very rarely go out now (baby #3 I'm pretty sure we'll never get out again haha) and if we did have a baby sitter it's usually me and OH that have a date , unless it's like a wedding or something.
Actually it's gotten to a stage now that I feel like I don't have anything interesting to talk about because I've been left out so much that I only really spend time with the kids ! Some of my friends now (at 30) still live the single student Life and just have completely different lives to me lol.