The March-ers 2019 - #7

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Welcome to no.7 mamas 😄

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Thread 6

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/3379197-The-March-ers-2019-6

@Wineandchoccy same here, keeping giving myself little 'breaks'. Getting hard to focus on anything not baby related at the moment!

@murphyrocks thanks for that site, I'm going to check it out. Can you really tell what area of the body it is at this stage?? That's amazing!!

Jess - sounds like you've had a dramatic GP trip!! Sounds quite funny though from an outsider perspective too. One to tell the baby when it's older!

Anyone else suddenly finding sitting on a desk chair at work very uncomfortable?? I've emailed my facilities team and also some of the other people who have been pregnant in my dept so see what they did... But it's really painful at the bottom of my spine. Wish I had a stand up desk as they've installed them in most other places, just my specific team is being done next summer. @whatalearningcurve where did you get your ball from? Want to look at them. I've seen other people with them over the years at work but don't know if it's a thing we already have or if you have to bring your own in and these people haven't replied to my email yet.

@cardboard33 this is the one that i've got www.amazon.co.uk/Natural-Birth-Fitness-Birthing-Ball/dp/B00769SJNI?th=1&tag=mumsnetforum-21

Work ordered it for me - yours should do as well if you request one as part of the risk assessments they should be doing for you.

You can buy cheaper ones but the hospital physio told me last week that you're best getting one that specifically says it's suitable for pregnancy use - the cheaper ones tend to just be gym balls which aren't as sturdy as they wouldn't normally be used as much and the last thing you want is one popping underneath you!

@cardboard33 I couldn't tell until quite late on last time but 8 think now I know what to feel for its easier to tell. Not an exact science though! Most offices will get you a ball for your desk if you ask - don't ask don't get!

I have one of these cushions when I’m working from home makes it so much comfier to sit at my desk

Just checking in before I fall off the thread again! Had a bit of a whirlwind couple of days with my first ever trip in an ambulance (DS breathing strangely - very very fast - he's all right though and it wasn't too scary as I already knew from the test the out of hours GP did that his oxygen levels were good, she just didn't want us to risk driving him to hospital ourselves). He's still breathing much faster than normal but apparently it's an upper respiratory infection and will clear up. Bloody good to get these things checked though. The GP was a bit put out that 111 hadn't asked me to say how many times he was breathing in a minute, because she said that because it was more than 70 (he is 2 years old) they should have sent an ambulance right away and not sepnt time referring him to the GP first. That was something I didn't know, so just sharing so you guys know now too!

I decided to speak to my midwife about how breathless I'm feeling and that I'm worried about iron deficiency, so she's going to do some bloods to check my iron levels, and check my blood pressure next week. I am spending so much time at hospitals at the moment it is a bit crazy!

Oh that must have been scary @BadBadBeans I’m glad dd is ok.

I am on iron tablets and they have helped with my breathlessness so hopefully if that’s what you need you should feel better

Ds sorry

Thanks @Wineandchoccy. Did your iron levels come back low at booking in, out of interest, or did the breathlessness lead to you being checked again? Mine were definitely normal at 9 weeks but I am sure I shouldn't be this breathless just from being pregnant - it wasn't like this with DS!

@BadBadBeans my bloods at booking in showed low iron levels, I started iron tablets at about 12 weeks and they took a few weeks to make me fully better. I was really dizzy and short of breath until then

@BadBadBeans my iron levels were on the low side of normal at booking in (9 weeks) The midwife has just ordered a repeat set of bloods for 28 weeks to check that they've remained stable and not dropped any further.

Might be worth asking for a repeat set of bloods to be done?

@Wineandchoccy thanks for that info - I hadn't realised it might take weeks to build levels back up if they are low! Good to know.

@TheWanderlust My midwife has kindly said she will do my bloods again on Monday to double check. Have you been taking iron supplements in the meantime? I have just started on spatone, as the tablets have made me constipated in the past. But obviously I will take tablets if I turn out to be low!

@BadBadBeans I've not been ... bit of an anti-tablet person unless absolutely necessary so have been holding off. Will take them if bloods show anything in 2 weeks time.

Hi all,

Checking in, feel like I've missed loads in just a few days.

@BadBadBeans that sounds scary! I'm so glad that your DS is ok and nothing too serious. Thanks for passing on the tip about the breaths within a minute, always good to know.

I saw the midwife yesterday and mentioned the anxiety but didn't get referred to anybody. She just said that there's not much I can do wrong etc and stick to the NHS guidance on the food but don't really feel like enough was done

I've been on holiday from work since Friday and came in today to unrealistic tasks, both in terms of what they are and how long I've been given to do them. There's still only a couple of us and we lost 2 to redundancy recently but the work hasn't gone with them, just reallocated to us. I almost walked straight back out this morning.. my heart was pounding in my chest, I just wanted to cry and baby was kicking away at the same time so worried he's picking up on it.

They are piling way too much work on me and my colleague with no end in sight (well for me when I go off for baby but still). I mentioned my worries via email this morning, that I was very very stressed and feeling lots of pressure, that on top of the workload I'm worried about my mum and also about the effect of my stress on the baby but nothing was said about that. I know the email was read because the work related question was discussed.

I know I'm rambling but I have no idea how I can stay working at this intense level. My maternity starts on my due date but I've put my holidays in before that to finish on 8th Feb but that seems too long away to keep going at this level of stress and with no support. Not really sure what advice I'm looking for but just feel so fed up with it all. I wish I could just leave now but I need the maternity money.

@BadBadBeans That sounds eventful! I'm glad your DS is ok, but it must have been worrying at the time. Glad your GP seems on the ball at least - 111 are a bit pants, made me ring the midwife when I asked for an out of hours GP service to get something for my sinus infection. Woke poor midwife up on a weekend who was fantastic and got me the number 111 didn't claim to have, but that wasn't her bloody job!

@melissa112 So sorry it sounds like the midwife didn't take your concerns seriously. That's really not very helpful, when it can be hard enough to open up and ask for help about anxiety in the first place, but sadly it's still hit and miss, and it does sound a little bit like she doesn't 'get' it. It does sound like you have a lot of pressure coming from many different sides, so not surprising you're feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Have you considered seeing if you can self-refer to IAPT (talking therapies) - in many areas of the country you can, so it's worth at least a google to see what's out there - definitely mention you're pregnant if you do. www.nhs.uk/service-search/Psychological-therapies-(IAPT)/LocationSearch/10008?fbclid=IwAR0fySctgtpzXuc9OP30aKqTWey1WlP6FzcEasSyDnHmVrq48Ml5iTec4ZQ Or is your GP any more helpful? Either way, please don't give up - even if the system doesn't always work the way it should it's not at all a reflection on whether you deserve support - you do.

You could also try and give the PANDAS helpline a ring - 0843 28 98 401 - www.pandasfoundation.org.uk/helpline/ - they're a charity focusing on support on perinatal mental health. Also have an email support service I think.

@melissa112 you should definitely consider getting signed off work, would you still get paid properly? And not to feel guilty about it the work load is their responsibility not yours. Also, if you can get through to mental health services through GP perhaps? You would be fast tracked as a pregnant lady, that’s the case in the midlands anyway. Please keep asking for help. I know it’s horrible when people don’t/won’t hear what you’re saying but unfortunately a lot of things we have to fight for which should not be the case. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way it must be difficult for you.

@wordsmithereens yes I think i will need to contact them myself. The midwife is lovely but didn't seem to understand the extent of it all. I could try the GP but the two of the three are very dismissive with me. I once had an infection on the roof of my mouth, couldn't eat for a week other than mini milks and mouth burning constantly with red spots. She told me it wouldn't hurt me not to eat for a few days and sent me on my way.. another GP saw me a few days later when I was desperate and was shocked that I hadn't been given antibiotics. Thank you for the contact information, I will definitely try both options.

@Gronk27 unfortunately due to morning sickness and having to be off work sick for around 2weeks this year I've only got 17 paid sick days left so it would only take me up to Christmas when I'm thankfully off from 21st Dec so trying to focus on that. Thank you for your kind words and advice.

Sorry all to bring the thread down. I really don't mean to, just don't feel like I'm being listened to elsewhere.

On a more pregnancy related note, baby has been kicking me all evening in the belly button which is making me queasy! I hate my belly button touched at the best of times, OH does it to wind me up sometimes but from the inside it's even worse! Midwife yesterday said he was on my right side head down and feet up so not sure how he's getting my belly button!

@melissa112 sorry to hear you're struggling to get the help you need - please do keep trying. If baby is head down feet up what you're feeling on your belly button is quite possibly a bum! Or knees/feet if they're curled up and baby is facing your front. It's such a bizarre feeling when they go for your belly button, mine was doing it last week!

@Murphyrocks Thank you, I'll keep going with it and see what help I can get. I'm more worried for the effect my stress is having on baby.

Haha yes it is bizarre isn't it, I yelled out in what I thought was pain initially but think it was just a big kick or whatever it was but in the belly button so a bit uncomfortable.

Do they tend to shift position much at this point? I know they can hide away at this stage but I can't remember the last time I felt anything on my left side, always seems to be high up on my right hand side for weeks now

@melissa112 yes they do still shift quite a bit at this stage, don't usually worry about position until a bit further down the line but I figure no harm in gently guiding him towards the right position! I can be pretty firm shoving him over if he tries to lie transverse (across my belly), which he does pretty regularly and makes his head push uncomfortably against my hip!

If it makes you feel any better the stress they say about being bad for baby is at the levels of living in a war torn country for example; not to belittle your anxieties but they're very unlikely to cause stress to the level of it affecting bub.

@melissa112 sorry you did not have a better experience with the midwife
I have no idea what my baby is doing but it was moving earlier and it was making me feel a bit sick and my stomach went a really odd shape so goodness knows what position he/she is in.

I have been on a course today and sat on s really uncomfortable seat my bum and lower back are sore.

@Murphyrocks Thank you, that's made me feel a bit better about the stress. How do you move baby? Are you able to tell where his head is?

@Wineandchoccy that's interesting that your stomach changed shape! Wonder what baby was up to!

@Wineandchoccy yeah I've driven 19 hours on my own today for work I was so sore and uncomfortable when I finally got home! I I like to play a fun game of what internal organ baby is playing with when I feel uncomfortable with the movements like that!

@melissa112 the moving essentially refers to gently massaging whatever bits are in the wrong place back where I want them to be, not sure if it's recommended though! For positioning the best advice I can offer is via the Spinning Babies website - particularly the forward leaning inversion (spinningbabies.com/learn-more/techniques/the-fantastic-four/forward-leaning-inversion/) then bouncing on a ball or doing some kneeling hip rotations to try and encourage them into a suitable/comfortable position. Glad I could help a bit on the stress!

@melissa112 Glad if the info is useful. Please don't apologise or feel bad for talking about this on the thread, you're not bringing it down, it's a space for us to support one another and all the more important if you're not feeling heard elsewhere. I'm sorry you've had such unhelpful experiences with doctors in the past as well (but glad one was a bit kinder!), I had a lot of hit and miss until I stumbled on my gp, so you're not alone there. As gronk says, in an ideal world we wouldn't need to advocate for ourselves so hard, especially when we feel vulnerable already, but sometimes there's no other way. Just try and focus on the ones that help you feel empowered, whenever you can.

Belly button kicks are very very odd! I don't think I realised this was what happened the other day until I read your discussion just now, but now it makes sense. I actually texted DH about baby's random bout of violence - none of the kicks had felt painful before.

Hi everyone, my first post in a while, hope we’re all doing well!

I’ve started to feel quite sluggish this week, mainly through the night and on a morning. I suppose this is a sign of things to come! I can’t believe the third trimester is approaching! 27 weeks tomorrow.