The March-ers 2019 #6

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Thread 5
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/3354202-The-March-ers-2019-5

@TheWanderlust Glad you're doing OK and got well looked after. Hope youre feeling better soon.

Thanks to everyone for their nice messages. @PassTheAfterEights work know I'm pregnant but if the business closes I'm not sure what can be done to avoid redundancy, I'd just have to be treated like everyone else. Its only a small company, I'm just hoping they at least keep going until after my qualifying week so I still get statutory maternity pay to help us.

@TheWanderlust glad you got some meds and was reassured. How far along are you? I wonder sometimes if the times I'm getting my more severe symptoms (like migraines!) are to do with little one having a growth spurt!

@melissa112 @PassTheAfterEights @1986mumof5 thanks for the words of reassurance. I've been comfortable and confident in the decisions I've been taking in this pregnancy so far, but just had that element of doubt placed in my mind by OH last night. I think he was concerned that I'd be drinking every day having seen me relax that bit more on holiday. Then he's got on good old google and sent his head into a bit of a tailspin. Also, we've had friends who have had kids recently and I think he sees things very generally as 'women don't drink when they're pregnant' which I know isn't the case for all women. Feel better this morning and migraine has cleared completely. First day back to work for me and quite looking forward to getting stuck back in. I won't be saying that on the train home I'll bet!

@ballanj I'm 19 weeks today. Combination of urine infection and baby's position was putting my pelvis in strain. It literally felt like I was being sliced open.

I felt so silly when they said it, but the midwife I saw was so reassuring and said never not call and always pop in to be checked over.

Feeling so much better this morning. OH let me sleep in this morning and only woke me as he was leaving for work. I think the 3 weeks off work to rest is definitely need.

Glad you're feeling better @thewanderlust and sorry for your scare.

@ballanj just to add my reassurance to the others I also wouldn't be concerned about that level of drinking - I've been having 2 units twice a week since week 12 as per the NHS recommendations when I was last pregnant and think as long as it's slowly and on a full stomach it's very low risk. I'm pretty sure the vast majority of children with foetal alcohol syndrome (which is the main reason for the t-total recommendation) are born to alcoholics where obviously the drinking is pretty extreme.

After some deliberation I have made the decision to unfollow this thread, despite having been here from the beginning and finding it a great source of support. I find 1986mumof5's contributions and attitude distasteful given the detrimental impact of reducing herd immunity from vaccinations and don't want that kind of negativity in my life, particularly during my pregnancy. However I'll still get notifications of messages so if anyone else would like to join the facebook group please do PM me and I'll get you on, or do just send me a message to chat!

^ thanks @murphyrocks.

Can I say, if anyone here has been frightened by 1986mumof5's big list of scary-sounding chemical ingredients in vaccines, I really urge you to do some research of your own and come to your own conclusions. This includes discussing it with your midwife, GP and any other HCP you think appropriate. They are not in cahoots with big pharma. There is nothing wrong with choosing natural health solutions as much as possible, but vaccines aren't the enemy and it's really important to not just blanket dismiss them when the consequences could put you and others at serious risk.

Just because things are chemicals/have chemical names, this does not make them inherently dangerous; for example formaldehyde, which I'm sure we all have a kneejerk response to NOT administer to our kids since we mainly associate it with preserving corpses, is naturally-occurring in all sorts of fruits, meats and our own bodies where it is vital for certain metabolic processes. It's really easy to be dazzled by big words, but you don't have to be.

I'm so sorry to hear that you are unfollowing @Murphyrocks you've made such a lovely contribution to all the threads and you will be missed 💐

yes, have loved MurphyRocks contributions and sad that stepping back feels necessary although I totally understand. I was going to leave the vaccine thing alone as the conversation had moved on, and it would be nice to keep this as civil and accepting as possible - we're all in the same boat, after all - so now I've said my bit I will be drawing a line under it and getting back to bump chat.
Hope you can pop in often, murphyrocks, and we'll keep up on facebook.

Can I please clarify something as I feel this has all got slightly out of hand. I made it very very clear that MY decision to not vaccinate my three youngest children is exactly that MY decision. I was not in any way suggesting that anybody do the same. I have done extensive research on the subject and that is my conclusion as it stands. I always make it clear when something is my own decision and always advise people to do their own research. To suggest I was attempting to scare anyone is frankly ridiculous. There are many subjects discussed here and not all of us are going to agree all of the time but I do not force my views upon anybody and certainly do not wish to induce fear amongst anybody. I have moved on from the discussion but if others on here would prefer I'll leave rather than people making backhand comments and making out things that are blatantly untrue and actually quite offensive. I have PMd murphyrocks to explain and it's up to her if she decides to join back

Ok so murphyrocks basically said what you were all thinking anyway and messaging each other about Im leaving you all to it. Enjoy your pregnancy ladies I know I will. Good luck

@ladycarlotta I felt the same as you that the conversation about vaccinations had moved on by the time I read it so didn't want to steer it back that way as it had descended into an argument. I haven't done the research about whether everything 1986Mumof5 listed is indeed included in the flu vaccine that we're offered or whether they do what she mentioned so don't feel I can contribute to reassure anyone one way or the other about the flu jab. All I can say is that I don't see why the NHS would be in some big collusion to make us all sick at their own costs and that I had a flu jab with my son and he and I are absolutely fine. I have my jab booked for Saturday and trust that it is the best thing for myself and my baby.
I'm sorry @Murphyrocks that you feel you'd want to leave the conversation. I agree that it was very negative and I was uncomfortable with it for that reason. I hope that you choose to stay as you would be missed. I'm also going to PM you about the Facebook group - was going to wait until I was 12 weeks before doing it then somehow I'm at 16 and still haven't got round to it!

@melissa112 You're very welcome, happy if anything is useful. Meditation is an interesting one - ironically the aim isn't actually to 'shut off' your thoughts as many people think - it's about changing your relationship to your thoughts. Over time you learn to hold them more lightly and with compassion and become less invested in the story you're telling yourself. That said, at the beginning you usually learn breath exercises and how to refocus your attention to the present moment, and that can feel like a nice 'break' once it clicks. :)

@wineandchoccy Still thinking and rooting for you for tomorrow - much love.

@TheWanderlust What a pain your night sounds, but it's great you're being looked after well! I hope the antibiotics kick in soon.

On the vaccination topic, I can only co-sign @ladycarlotta on all points. I can understand the fears that may lead people to anti-vaccination stances, but as a former scientist it is about a risk/benefit balance for me, and I know for myself there is no question that I will immunise, both for myself, my child and wider society. I also believe our minds lead us in circuitous paths at times that we're not always able to readily see in each moment, and that can lead us to cause offense or hurt without intending to. I hope everyone can come away from this situation and find peace in whatever way makes most sense to them.

Back to bump talk, and I've had my first cup of coffee during this pregnancy, and baby is kicking up a storm! I also felt quite exhausted and sickly and super thirsty over the past few days. Undecided whether I should worry about GD, or if it's more linked to my reflux and fighting off that cold, but today seems a bit better, so fingers crossed it is the latter.

Is anyone else getting "baby brain"? My mind feels so foggy today and I've been getting confused about basic things like what day or time it is! V weird... & not ideal for work!

I work for a pharmaceutical company in R and D department and I just want to highlight the amount of work we do to make sure the drugs we develop are safe. There is so much external (legal) and internal guidance we follow to ensure anything added to a drug is at the safe level, taking into account the frequency, dose and length with which administration of the drug is intended for use. We have to prove these levels and how we intend to control them everytime we submit to a country that we want to use a drug there. I don't work directly with vaccines, but I can assure you they will follow the exact same rules as mainstream pharmaceuticals. So that exhauative list so eloquently written is probably true, but trust me, they are not in harmful levels. Also half the stuff on that list will be present in so many foods, drugs and other chemical products. Compounds have different properties and uses.

There is also so much research showing no link to vaccines any kind if illness. Any reasearch that says it does, has been refuted for poor patient studies and analysis of data.

Vaccines are never 100% effective, that is the nature of them. However, they are shown to save lives.

In another note I have my 16 week appointment tomorrow morning and am very excited. I will be 17 +2 and really hope they listen for the heartbeat. I haven't felt any movements so far as first baby so a little knowkedge that all is cooking fine would be much appreciated!

@LittleKitty1985 I've had baby brain for the last few weeks. I'm forgetting literally everything! It's very frustrating.
Also, is anyone else suffering from light headedness/ feeling faint? It started this week and I generally feel a bit weak!

@modgem I've got my 16 week appointment tomorrow too. I got back dated at my 12 week scan so the midwife pushed back the appointment so she could hear heartbeat. Fingers crossed she finds it easily and we can have a listen!

@AssumeItWasSomethingClever I had a period of feeling quite lightheaded, especially when I got up, but luckily it passed. I assumed it was low blood pressure as my blood volume increased.

@modgem I had my 16 week appointment earlier this week at 15+5 and they heard the heartbeat no problem. It was amazing actually. I have also had some popping sensations that might be baby (or my digestive system - not quite sure which yet). Hope your appointment goes well.

Hi all
I had my 16 week app last week . All that happened was BP was checked . Urine checked then I was sent on my way with my actual urine pot to dispose of myself as they did not have a clinical waste bin . Felt completely pointless to me the app. She didn't ask any questions . Didn't get to hear the heart beat . I thought I was going to get weighed as well

@jenlou1992 that sounds disappointing! Did you ask about the heartbeat? I wasn’t weighed either but they did urine and BP, asked lots about symptoms (headaches, if I had any lightheadedness etc), did bloods as I’m O-, told me about the antenatal classes available etc. They also asked me about my relationship with my partner and what support I had from friends/family. It does seem like a postcode lottery. You could always call if you have specific questions?

@Jenlou1992 How frustrating. Are you seeing the same midwife each time or does it rotate? I hope you have opportunity to raise questions you have via other routes if you need it.

Just had my 16 week appointment. I'm exactly 18 weeks today. It all seemed a bit disorganised, the midwife still isn't getting on with the app. that has replaced the notes. She asked me lots of haven't you had this questions, why haven't they done that. I don't know you're the expert, love.
Anyway,
I had BP done
Tested my urine
Asked me if I was feeling well in myself
Asked me if all was well at home and I felt happy and supported
She gave me my blood results (yet to be uploaded) all clear but I am O neg so have to have Anti D.
I asked what all my other apps. were for
I got my exemption sorted
I gave her my downs, etc results
She told me how to book in for my flu and whooping cough jabs
Told me to get onto booking into classes asap
She asked me if I would like to hear the heartbeat! I said yes obvs. It was going like the clappers haha.
I was half expecting bloods and jabs. Just my luck I'm negative and I have to have extra injections. I hate needles.

@gronk27 in my area (and from earlier discussions on here quite a few others too) are in a trial for O- mothers where they test blood at 16 weeks to find out the baby’s blood group. If it’s O- I won’t need anti-D, and if it’s + they’ll carry on as before. Shame they can’t offer you this if you don’t like needles, though they do say that by the time you’ve given birth a needle seems fine.