The March-ers 2019 #5

[Angelmiracle]

Welcome to thread 5!!!

Check in March mamas to be 😊🤰🏼👣

Thread4

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/3336502-The-March-ers-2019-4

@Angelmiracle I am hoping dds newborn white clothes have survived storage but if not I will be soaking in vanish and washing and hanging in the tiny bit of winter sunshine we get to make them white again.
I love a newborn baby in a white sleepsuit

@Wineandchoccy me too!! I bought DS a white Harrods babygro and hat when I was 5 months along and completely forgot about it!! So I've kept it handy this time lol.

Hope your cold doesn't last long. DH and DS are both dosed I hope I can escape it 😩

@melissa112 we picked up our pram quite early last time about 22 weeks I think. Just left it in the box under the stairs. We used it instead of a Moses basket in the living room too (kept the whole thing intact) and saved some space. Just went straight into the cotbed in our room upstairs then. We're getting a new mattress as DS used it until he was 4 and although it had a cover and had been cleaned it did get in a bit of a mess. I've also bought a travel cot to use in the living room once he outgrows the pram, it was £15 in Aldi!

@Angelmiracle fingers crossed you don’t catch it. I’m in bed with pjs, dressing gown, duvet on and still feel cold. DH has gone in the spare room because I keep sneezing so I have the whole bed to myself I may let the cold linger

@cardboard33 totally agree about it being a minefield! After we had our 12 week scan, me and the OH said we'd take a wander around some shops, just to start getting ideas. He didn't believe me until that moment how much of a minefield it is! Before that I went into John Lewis to look at buggies and said to OH 'I'm not going back there again on my own' 😂

One thing we are planning on doing is going to one of the Mothercare expectant parent events. You register on the website and you'll be informed when they are so you can book. No obligation to buy but thinking might get some advice on buggies, car seats, feeding etc.

Also, John Lewis do a similar thing but it's one-to-one, but again it's really just taking you through different things to think about, and you're under no obligation to buy. Again you book an appointment. Not all of the stores offer the service but we're thinking of doing this aswell after 20 weeks. Then, we will source the things we want to buy ourselves online

I'm definitely finding it all a minefield too. I've been looking at the bugaboo, icandy strawberry and uppababy vista. Although haven't seen that last one in the flesh so will need to do that.

@ballanj we also went to have a look round after the 12week scan and came away more confused that before! OH has a 9 year son but he feels as confused as me when looking at it all.

The Mothercare and John Lewis events sound good. They did have a Baby Event (can't remember the name) we got invited to at Event City in Manchester where you can apparently get some good deals but it was this weekend and just didn't want to get any of the big stuff til after 20 weeks. My scan isn't until 29th October so feels like so long away!

Glad to see the good feedback for the Snuzpod. Will have to have a look in more detail.

I'm even worrying already about blankets v sleeping bag v whatever else. My area does NHS antenatal classes which include a breastfeeding specific one so might have a look at those as I feel so lost with what I need to buy, what is a nice to have, and what I don't need but I suppose all that can depend on baby!

One thing I would say going to these events, take everything they say (especially on car seats!) with a large punch of salt. Do your research and be happy with your choices.

We ended up actually buying our pram on amazon in parts as it was about £100 cheaper than buying the bundle from mothercare (and we got the colour we wanted too).

Oh and check any pram fits in your boot, easily!!!! You do not want to be fighting to get the pram in when it is pouring with rain!

For the past 3 nights I am near positive that I am feeling the baby. Initally I thought maybe it's my uterus stretching but do you really feel that 3 nights in a row if at all?! It just seems so early at 13+4. It feels like baby is pinging all around down there 😂

Hi everyone. Sorry haven't been on been pretty manic at home/work. Been on night shifts since Saturday had yesterday off and now back at work. Tried to catch up with what's been said ...
@ballanj hope you enjoyed your birthday. Mine is at the end of this month. Will be my second on the trot pregnant. Note to all try and avoid this if you can lol. I don't really drink or go out but I do enjoy being spolit by DH on my bday which usually ends in us very drunk laughing like teenagers in our living room. So I missed it last year and now again this year. Also DHs is end of Nov so can't celebrate his in our traditional fashion either lol.
In regards to second children and stuff you need. We pretty much only got new clothes. My eldest was 3 when DC2 was born. We bought a Graco travel system for eldest which then was used for DS. I found the pushchair part really safe and sturdy but annoying when only going short distances (to the shop/park) so bought a stroller once he was around 18 months. I also bought new feeding bottles but reused the steriliser. All 4 of my children so far have hated their Moses baskets. Reused the eldest's one with DC2 and 3 but I threw out all baby stuff about a month before I found out about DC4. It had been lying around for 6 years and we weren't planning another baby. Turns out I should've waited!! One thing I never buy anymore is scraty mittens. The bloody things always fall off and most gros in Tesco/asda etc have built in ones you can just fold down. Even the 9-12 month ones have them. Nappy bins are a waste of time as are nappy sacks. Change baby put nappy in your outside bin. If it's late at night/cold/you're in bed bang it in a carrier bah near your normal bin then take it outside first chance you get. Tesco own brand teething gel is just as good as bonjela but a fraction of the price. Usually £1.50 but very often on offer for £1. Tesco own brand babywipes are great too. It's quite forward planning but when it comes to weaning baby you might want to consider skipping babyfood and just giving mashed versions of what you like to eat. Start with mashed potato and beans, banana, porridge made with baby's formula, basically anything soft. I found that when my eldest had baby food I ended up weaning her twice as baby food is so bland and doesn't actually taste like real food. I also found some interesting research that it can hinder your child's palette as when you eat things naturally vary in taste but baby food always tastes the same so for instance if you make you child spaghetti Bolognese and they like it they may be expecting it to taste exacy like that every time they have it which as you know simply is not possible. It also saves a ton of money. There's probably more tips I can give but my pregnancy brain fully kicked in about 2 weeks ago and I'm struggling lol

Hey guys, sorry I've been awol. I have been reading along, I'm just so tired in the evenings that I can't bring myself to turn on the laptop to post - and I hate posting from my phone!

@Nightmanagerfan going back to a conversation from days ago (!), you are more than welcome and I'm glad I've been of some support. My MN antenatal group with DS was what kept me sane, I think - especially the women there who had been through it all before and were so full of wisdom!

@cardboard33 @ballanj OH GOD, the baby product decisions. It carries on, as well - when we went to get the next car seat up for DS I ended up driving away from Mothercare without buying one because I actually couldn't mentally assimilate all the options that were being thrown at me! We were lucky in that our neighbours gave us a lot of newborn stuff for free that we knew was absolutely A-OK - car seat never been in a crash, etc. We borrowed their phil&teds buggy too, but it was a double one and was really really difficult to maneouvre around our local country town. I battled on with it until DS was big enough to go in a cheap collapsible puschair. I do, in hindsight, wish we had spent out on a decent pram that suited our needs.

Things I got last time that I didn't really get on with / use:
Glider chair. I also got mine as a second-hand bargain @Velcro88* and it is amazingly comfortable... but I just could not get into a good nursing position with it! It's in storage at the moment, but if I don't get into it with this baby either then it's going to be sold on.

• Ring sling. I could never work out how to get the f%cking thing tight enough! I also loved seeing the pictures of mums carrying toddlers on their backs with them, but there was no way on God's green earth that my toddler was ever going to be willing to be bound to my back by a bit of cloth.
• Second-hand reusable nappies. They leaked through within an hour, EVERY TIME. I have now been given a different load second-hand from a friend, including waterproof outers, and she promises me that they last four hours easily even without the waterproof outers. We shall see!

Things I did use but would get better versions of next time:

• pram (see above: we borrowed one but it was unnecessarily heavy and awkward)
• Stretchy jersey sling. Next time I would get a Close Caboo type sewn sling because it was a PAIN IN THE ARSE trying to get the jersey sling on solo in muddy National Trust car parks without trailing metres of fabric on the ground. And DS loved to suck the edge of the sling closest to his face so I was always paranoid about him ending up ingesting mud/dog poo.

Things I bloody loved:

• Medela electronic breast pump
• Cot top changer. I know the floor is the safest place to change a baby, but I always kept one hand on DS as I changed him, and after months of breaking my back kneeling on the floor to change him (and causing ongoing back issues in the process) this was AMAZING.
• Moses basket stand (DH reckoned we didn't need one - he wasn't the one leaning over to get the baby up for feeds in the night!!!!!)
• Little Green Sheep mattresses - for the moses basket and for the cot. They are organic, totally natural and absolutely beautiful. I got the Little Green Sheep mattress protectors, too.
• Baby sleeping bags. You can't use them from newborn, but I used them from about 6 months and DS is still in them at 26 months - this time I will prob start using them earlier.

@Wineandchoccy thank you for the Lullaby Trust link. I am not sure yet whether I will re-use the Little Green Sheep mattress I got for the moses basket. They're about £40 so not cheap, but then again I will be able to reuse so many other things from DS that it wouldn't break the bank to buy a new mattress...

So I've had an interesting follow-up letter from the hospital after my 12 week bloods. I was originally told that they found some weak antibodies in my blood (I'm O+) and that they would need to take blood again at 28 weeks and at birth, as well as cord blood. The follow-up letter is the consultant's report which I'm supposed to pass to my midwife. It says that the antibodies are likely of no clinical significance.

But it also says I need to be under the care of a hospital obstetric unit. Does that just mean that I wouldn't be allowed to give birth at a midwife-led unit? (I wouldn't be doing that anyway!)

AND it says that if any procedures are planned for me, that they need to be given two days' notice in order to source the appropriate bloods in case of a blood transfusion. All well and good, but what would happen if I had an emergency section like last time?!?!?!! This just makes me feel even more that I would like a planned C-section...

Oh! @1986mumof5 YES to the built-in fold-over cuffs in babygros. Scratch mittens are a total, total waste of time. I hated them!

OH! Also, for breastfeeding mums: LANOLIN. Stuff of the gods. I got through about five tubes of it in 18 months. Expensive but so worth it. Look out for offers in Boots etc and get at least two.

ALSO! For the birth. DISPOSABLE KNICKERS. Don't get duped into buying cheap Primarni knickers a size bigger. They are NOTHING like as comfortable as lovely hideous mesh disposable knickers. The hospital gave me a pair and I immediately sent DH out to buy more. They were WONDERFUL.

OH! Last post, promise. Cheeky Wipes also go in the things I loved list. I've already harped on about those here before though :D

Sounds like a midwife led unit would be out BadBadBeans but your midwife should be able to confirm anything if you are concerned.

I loved my Close Caboo, only thing to be aware of is the straps if you're short, but easily tucked in as long as you remember and they don't drop in the mud! After we had a connecta (now integra) which was brilliant until DS wanted no assistance in getting anywhere (bye pram, bye slings!) at about a year old (he started walking at 10.5 months).

Definitely get shares in lanolin if bf, and also find out what you can now. There is so much poor info out there about breastfeeding sadly. Find out what support there is, if any, in your area and if there is no NHS support have a look if you have a la leche league or any NCT bf supporters. It is bloody hard to start with, but then you just kind of find it all falls into place and is so easy (especially in the middle of the night!)

Really interesting programme on Radio 4 about fertility and pollutants, including exposure to phthalates and taking paracetamol while pregnant: www.bbc.co.uk/radio/play/b0bkrcs6

Thanks Squirtles; I guess the midwife will clear it up for me in in a couple of weeks. Not too fussed anyway as it doesn't look like it would change anything that I want anyhow. HA, yes, my DS started walking a bit freakishly early too at 9 months and I think that was part of the reason why I was never, ever going to be able to get him in a sling on my back. Just not interested in being pinned down! Mind you, he does love to be carried now he's bigger, and I can't really do it as it knackers my back, so maybe I should have persevered with the ring sling...

@Wineandchoccy thanks for the lullaby trust info. I don't know is DSs mattress was waterproof covered do don't know if it needs replacing. It seems to imply that second hand within the family is fine but I can't get my head around how that works.

I agree with the scratch mitts, waste of time. Built in ones on baby grows are fab! Sleeping bags I think can be used from 9lbs and we loved putting DS in his. It felt so much of a relief to know he was safe and warm after a couple of weeks of blankets and trying to guess what layers he needed. One of the sleeping bag companies had a temperature guide to show what tog rating should be used at what temperature and with what clothing and that made me feel much better than guessing what layers he should have.

Lanolin is great - breastfeeding hurts to start and lanolin is so much relief. Don't let people tell you that it only hurts when done wrong because it's just not true. But more than that - don't let anyone make you feel bad if you choose not to bf or can't bf. There's loads of info out there (as someone said, not all good) and its possible to learn to bf better. My son stopped gaining weight at about 9 weeks and I think it was because of my stress (PND and other I'll health) so I switched to bottles. It felt right for us but I felt judged by others - if you want to bottle feed then do it. My DS is so healthy and has been a great weight since we switched so never had to look back.

Can I ask- anyone had weird/unexpected pregnancy symptoms?

My general boob ache I gone now and I knew to expect the veins and the colour change but I seem to be getting dry skin ON my nipples! Didn't expect boob dandruff!!

@notdoingthat... Boob dandruff made me lol! I've got dry skin too. My scalp is awful. Every time the wind blows my hair I create a snow storm. Not sure about nipples, I'll have to check that later!
Also, no one warned me on the amount of discharge I'd get!! (wayyyy tmi, sorry)

@jenfur you're so right about it being a load of bull that it only hurts if done wrong a good technique I used on my extremely sore nipples were those keep in the fridge water packs for if your kid get a bump. I had Mr bump on one boob and Mr happy on the other lol. I have struggled with bf my last two due to blocked milk ducts. I felt lumps in my breasts and rushed to the docs expecting the worst but she said was just blocked milk ducts. When DD2 was born I initially bf but after a week she was loosing weight and I started Combi feeding. I felt bad as with previous 2 I bf until 7/8 months but that's just what happens sometimes. This time round it was even worse. I'd already prepared to Combi feed DD3 but I only managed 5 days bf then she was fun time bottles. She also has a milk protein allergy so has to have prescription milk which is a nightmare. I have come to the conclusion that as long as I manage to give baby the initial colostrum straight after birth and as much bf as I can produce after it's a good enough start. All mothers/babies are different so if you struggle bf don't suffer in silence it does NOT make you a bad mum. Even if you chose to bottle feed from the outset this is your choice.
With regards to sleeping in the day as I said previously all 4 of my kids so far have shunned the Moses basket I had rocking stands and everything but to no avail. I tend to put them in the sofa if I'm also sitting there or on a play mat (the ones with the toy bars with dangling toys) with cushioned support underneath. In terms of layers my second midwife gave me sound advice that I stick to - whatever you've got on give baby one more layer so for example if you have on a top and a cardigan baby needs vest group and blanket. If you have on just a t-shirt baby needs vest and gro. At night time I layer thin blankets rather than one thick one - unless it's freezing two thin blankets are usually fine on top of vest and gro.

@assume yeah the discharge is no fun. I seem to have much more with this pregnancy than any of my others
@notdoingthat boob dandruff is a new one on me but lmao at you calling it dandruff. I'd say use lots of cocoa butter added bonus is it theres one that helps reduce stretch marks if your boobs get huge and smells divine too!!

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@notdoingthat haha. Someone on pregnancy board mentioned this and I suggested they get the Lansinoh Lanolin nipple cream (that the ladies up thread mentioned) to soften them it's great and it'll be useful for afterwards too.

@AssumeItWasSomethingClever haha I've been using panty liners for a few months now- same problem! At first I kept thinking, 'was that wee? Did I just wee?' But I know what it is now!

@1986mumof5 @Angelmiracle I ended up getting the mama mio pregnancy boob tube which is pretty good but they still get dry if forget a day (I'm so bad at forgetting to moisturise!). Something tells me BFing is going to be a real laugh 😂

@notdoingthat yeah it's the full barrel lol I never got used the tingling when baby cries but loved that my body was so in tune with baba. However the pain when baba still hungry and breasts empty was excruciating I'm not gonna lie. Plus the added benefit of bottles is Daddy can join in night feeds hahaha yeah right. 4 kids and DH has probably done 10 night feeds. That's our arrangement though as DH is one of those 'if I'm awake I'm awake' kind of people. I like my sleep so I get up feed baby then back to bed. dH would have me up at 3am wanting to start the day lol.