Feb 2019 Babies thread 6. Into the second trimester

[maxiflump1]

New thread ladies after the last one only lasted 2 weeks
Not sure about you all but I'm definitely feeling a lot better now at 14 weeks. Let's hope it lasts!! As you were.....

@AliceRR. Mine isn’t quite as good as that. I get 18 weeks full pay then 21 weeks stat pay and then 13 weeks at zero! Hoping to take the full year but still working out finances!

@jeanzbeanz please don't feel guilty. I totally feel you. I've had a pretty smooth ride but I haven't enjoyed being pregnant either, tbh, and am not feeling bonded / anything really towards the baby. I'm struggling with body changes and fatigue etc and miss who I was before being pregnant. I was heartbroken when I was told early on that bub was probably ectopic (which wasn't the case!) and haven't been able to summon the same positivity/ connection since. Makes me sound like a horrible person but I think it's actually quite common not to feel connected. That's what I try to tell myself anyway...

I am told that the time you bond varies person to person and it could be as late as a couple of weeks after birth.

I think the stage of pregnancy we're at is hard because we don't have any of the benefits (a cute baby etc) and lots of struggles / discomfort.

It would be completely understandable if you'd had a smooth ride and given you've had such a difficult time it's even more understandable. Please be kind to yourself xx

For those of you at or approaching 16 weeks, remember to make an appointment for your whooping cough vaccination (needs to be given between 16 and 32 weeks for maximum benefit).

@bubblybrit We get 13 full, 13 half and 13 stat. Can’t do the math (blame preg brain) but probably works our similar if you are getting 18 at full pay 🤔 But yes we need to work our a budget too and we are looking at buying a house and obviously we need to be mindful of my income while I’m on mat leave if we have a bigger mortgage...

@welshweasel - thanks for the prompt. Got mine tomorrow - really looking forward to it actually x

I'm just going to get maternity allowance this time as I resigned just after I found out I was pregnant. It's going to be a big change from last time when I got 20w full pay then 19w half pay! 🤦‍♀️ I've been doing some budgeting this afternoon to work out how much we can afford to spend on nursery fees as I think I'll struggle with 4 at home all the time so will need to use nursery and family help as much as I can!

@Alicejj8x don't panic. Pre-eclampsia only develops after 20 weeks of pregnancy so headaches at this stage would not be indicative of that. Unfortunately they're just another symptom of a normal pregnancy!

I suffered with preeclampsia with my first

Welcome on board @1Wanda1! We are a chatty bump and you will get no judgement here How are your teenagers feeling about having a baby sister?

Thanks for your reply Maxiflump1. My teenagers don't know yet! One of them has GCSE results tomorrow and I didn't want to detract from that with the baby news so am waiting till afterwards to tell them. One will be ecstatic as loves babies - the other one I am not sure what the reaction will be. Am a bit nervous about it.

Random one for you ladies however, urine samples, when's the best time? Have my 16 week appointment in the morning and just wondering whether to go with first morning or the one after? Not sure it matters but just wondering? Xx

Doesn’t matter yakadee!

@1wanda1 it’s gcse results here too for my stepdaughter. V nervous!

@AliceRR. I’m redecorating at the moment so money is being spent right, left and centre. Trying to get some of the messier jobs completed before baby arrives! Need to take the money being spent into consideration when working out our finances. DH has a well paid job so I’m hoping that everything will be ok as stat maternity pay isn’t great in comparison to my actual salary 😬!!

@welshweasel - thanks ☺️

@bubblybrit I get it. DH and I have been a bit worried about the finances. I’m glad we’ve done up our house (finished a few months ago!) but it’s not a great time to move / get a bigger mortgage when I’ll be on mat pay and then maybe going back to work part time. I really believe we’ll work it out and it will be fine, though, and I’m sure you will too

@bubblybrit I manage alongside someone else at a busy salon no way of tweaking hours my midwife said i must take a lunch break but today the receptionist rudly booked me back to back without a break and there wasnt anyone to move clients to! @fredthespider its so strange listening to how different hospitals do things i havent had 16week check but i had a follow up to midwife appointment and they done heartbeat x

@bubblybrit Snap! We only moved into this house year and a half ago and completley gutted it but im now redecorating the bedroom ready for baby and everything that comes with it!! Im obsessed with decorating and cleaning i was diagnosed with OCD 3 years ago and it drives my anxiety insane but DP is very clean and tidy so helps a lot.
Cant stop thinking about what im having and guessing today think its because we find out saturday!! Excited

@AliceRR. You are right. It will all fall into place I’m sure. Still can’t help worrying about it which isn’t really doing anyone any good!

@Lulabell1. I would have hoped that your receptionist would have been a little more thoughtful. It must be tough being on your feet all day so make sure that you are definitely taking your lunch break. Oh I bet you are counting down until Saturday. It really is very exciting when you are told 😀!! You can then start thinking about colours for the little ones room! My DH said I’m not allowed too much pink!

We've just bought a house which needs absolutely loads of work. Luckily we've got some saved ready but after trying for a year I wasn't really expecting to get pregnant within a month of moving in so we've had to reasses our plans a bit!

This is really odd but every time I try to eat an evening meal I feel really, really hot (to the point I've even taken my trousers off mid meal to try and cool down!!) and very suddenly really tired. Happens before I eat, basically as soon as I see the plate of food, and lasts all meal. I'm assuming it's psychological as it happens before I've even taken a bite but has this happened to anyone else?? All pregnancy I've been able to have breakfast and lunch fine but have had loss of appetite at dinner time - but it's much, much worse now.

My boobs have suddenly felt VERY heavy. Like feels like my chest is being pulled down.

I ordered some maternity bras but they don't fit my forever growing breasticles!!

Any large boobed maternity bras out there at a reasonable price? I'm sure I'll outgrow them soon 😩🙈

I’m with those of you who are nervous about GCSE results as i’m a teacher and have 32 kids who i’m going to see get their results tomorrow. Think i’d cry even without the hormones but i’m sure i’m going to be a wreck.

Visa vi maternity leave I don’t get anything except government mat pay, which is £140 a week so not much. I’ve been on supply all year so don’t qualify for statutory maternity pay even if I start a full time contract now. It’s not great but I’ve got some savings and am living with my parents for now until probably around Christmas (if I can cope that long) to save on paying rent. It’s definitely not going to be nice moneywise though whilst on maternity leave.

@Fiep thanks so much for sharing your experience, your kind words really mean a lot. Thank you.

To those who are redecorating etc.... we are in the middle of a MAJOR renovation! Currently living with my parents (which has been a huge blessing with me having been so ill) and our house is just about getting to the stage where you can see what shape each room will be. Hopefully by the end of the month it will be plastered, then we need to start fitting kitchen / bathrooms / flooring etc etc!! So many decisions to make. The house was a wreck when we bought it so no room is untouched, hence we've had to move out! Will be an amazing family home, can't wait til it's done.

Fingers crossed for your SD tomorrow welshweasel. I feel more nervous now than I did about my own GCSE results.

@jeanzbeanz weve been doing a major renovation too this year..hoping to move back in at the end of September and I can't wait! We've been living with my parents since January and whilst it's been great to have my mum around to help with the kids, particularly whilst I've been feeling awful I can't wait to have our own space back! My aim is to get it totally done including the outside by the end of the year! It's amazing the difference once it's all plastered, you really feel like it's starting to take shape! When do you think you'll be back in?