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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

November 2018 #3

999 replies

olderthanyouthink · 08/04/2018 05:12

Ante-natal thread for babies due this November, continued...

Stats spreadsheet is here - add and update yourself as needed!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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23
TheImprobableGirl · 12/04/2018 15:56

@BadBadBeans I had scans at 8+2, and 9+4 - both were external ultrasounds - couldn't see much on the first, just a fuzzy blob but second much clearer, and she said if she couldn't see much then would try transvaginal - so hopefully they would do the same for you.

@Magpie24 I would also ring EPAU, even if midwife had to refer you the first time, once you are on their systems then you can self refer if more bleeding. I saw the heartbeat etc at 8+2 and they were fine with me going back in at 9+4

@XSunnyX I've never known a quad-pregnancy but known a triple, they experienced pregnancy symptoms much worse than my single symptoms but everyone is different! Four would be a logistical nightmare for me, well done for embracing the possibility and staying positive! It could be the only one sac will fill, as the odds of a multiple pregnancy are so low, but someone has to have them still!

@Emma0902 There are 3.5 years between 1 and 2, and will be 4.5 between 2 and 3, I found a buggy board to be fantastic, but can see how you would struggle with a smaller gap. There are little seat attachments you can get for the larger boards which would be good for a smaller tot - never underestimate how tricky it is to steer a double through doors! I would definitely go with something like the Donkey where one seat is in front of the other rather than side by side

GreenMeerkat · 12/04/2018 16:14

Hi @Emma0902 I'm pregnant with my third.

Age gap between DD2 and DD2 is only 18 months so very small.

DD2 will be 3 and a half when this one is born so a bit more sensible!

GreenMeerkat · 12/04/2018 16:15

DD1 and DD2*

TinyPawz · 12/04/2018 17:17

Told my father today, that was very underwhelming to be honest. When I told him I was pregnant with Dd he stopped talking to me for over 2 years, I was 25, stable job, own home etc. This time much older, nonworking and private renting. I don't get it! I was seriously expecting more fireworks. All well. That is another 'bad' thing off my list. Aul lad must have mellowed significantly in his old age

TheImprobableGirl · 12/04/2018 17:52

Ahh tinypawz at least its a hurdle over and done with! Dh told mil last week, she said “well I should be happy, but I’m not.”
Quite tame really! Last pregnancy fil asked me if I had considered abortion due to being in ‘my position’ (y’know, not even MARRIED to dp at that stage- the horror. Despite the fact we had been together 7 years and had one Dd already Grin)
So looking forward to that!

pipsqueak126 · 12/04/2018 18:00

Wow guys, your parents / in laws sound mega unsupportive! :-( We plan on telling parentals pending a good 12 week scan. I'm hoping for a good reaction from my parents (they've two grandkids already) and my MIL (who is in a wheelchair with MS and will probably get emotional, but I know she'll be happy). We aren't on good terms with my FIL (never have been in the 12 years we've been together) so I don't even know how he'll find out - certainly not through me or DH!

NoCatsHere · 12/04/2018 18:01

Hello everyone I’m sorry to those of you spotting and having anxious times. I can totally relate, after the 2 mc last year I’m having days where I panic and other days where I feel remarkably calm. I rang my EPU this morning hoping for an early scan due to two losses but they said I needed to have had three losses or else symptoms like spotting etc. They said my doctor could refer me but my doctor couldn’t get through either. I could probably afford a private scan but I’d prefer EPU to see me. I’m going to chat to my midwife about it in my booking in appointment on Tuesday and see if she can help me.

TinyPawz · 12/04/2018 18:04

@pipsqueak126 my mother by contrast has been brilliant, she knows how much this baby is wanted and even came to my first epu scan with me. My father is an odd man at the best of times. I was expecting support from him either way.

TinyPawz · 12/04/2018 18:06

@NoCatsHere keep pushing your doc for referral. That's insane. I had two loses and was referred no problem to epu. That said I was practically hyperventilating explaining to doc that I needed to know that baby was ok.

TinyPawz · 12/04/2018 18:06

*wasn't.

Mayah · 12/04/2018 18:23

So I had a private scan yesterday, as well as my booking app. Everything went well, thankfully. Baby is ok so far, measuring 10+1. I apparently have a retroverted uterus which means, instead of my uterus pointing towards my belly button (normal), mine is pointing backwards shrugs. Doesn't affect anything apparently, and it usually pops into place later on when baby gets bigger.

@TheImprobableGirl @TinyPawz sorry to hear about the lack of excitement from DP/PIL. Hope they're more supportive once the news sinks in. Not something you need on your mind at this time

BadBadBeans · 12/04/2018 18:48

Hey guys, I'm now passing very small clots of black blood which turn toilet paper red around them. Feeling a bit periody too. Midwife has referred me to epu for a scan but she said she would ring me back and that was 90 mins ago... I guess I will ring back in the morning if I haven't heard. Don't know how I feel really. Surprisingly calm?

intelligentPutty · 12/04/2018 18:56

@BadBadBeans oh that's horrid that she's not called back! Can you call her again? Hope all ok for u and it's just some spotting. (Apparently normal). How far are u?

BadBadBeans · 12/04/2018 18:56

A bit of red along with the brown now. Holding on to @toasterstrudle 's experience as a bit of hope - it's not over till it's over! But I don't think the periody feeling I have is a good sign. DH is unlikely to be hugely sympathetic if it is bad news as he is quite prosaic about these things, so I'm a little nervous about that. Thank goodness I've told some girl friends!!!

BadBadBeans · 12/04/2018 18:58

@intelligentPutty I'm 9 weeks. I did have to turn my phone off for ten mins as I had to pick up DS and phones aren't allowed in nursery, so maybe it would be okay if I called and said I was worried I might have missed her call? I don't want to harass!

intelligentPutty · 12/04/2018 19:01

I would def call her back. I'm sure she won't mind. X

NoCatsHere · 12/04/2018 19:14

badbeans oh shit I’m sorry you have this worry. I’d defo call back, she won’t mind at all, she may well have been distracted and will feel bad. If you’re getting some red now I think you are more than ok to call and try and sort out a scan ASAP.

BadBadBeans · 12/04/2018 19:20

Thanks @intelligentPutty and @NoCatsHere :) I just called back and she was super lovely. She has put a referral through but EPU is closed now so she said to ring again if they haven't contacted by tomorrow afternoon. I'm supposed to be going to an event tomorrow night that is quite important to me so hoping I don't have to call it off!

LastNightsMakeUp · 12/04/2018 19:25

Thinking of you @BadBadBeans I don't think it'd hurt to call the EPU first thing in the morning. Hopefully you can be seen and in the clear for your event tomorrow night. Any wait is horrible🤞

NoCatsHere · 12/04/2018 19:29

badbeans I would call mid morning if you haven’t heard before then, especially as you have something important to go to in the evening. Fingers crossed you hear from them soon.

Emelene · 12/04/2018 19:33

I hope you get an appointment quickly @BadBadBeans. Thanks

I had my booking appointment today, my midwife is really nice and apparently I'm a low risk pregnancy (I was worried with my mums preeclampsia and other obstetric issues) so I'm feeling pretty positive at the minute! Smile

NoCatsHere · 12/04/2018 19:34

tinypawz thankyou I’m going to talk it through with my midwife and explain my concerns/anxiety. I think it’s easier face to face and I can say what an awful experience I had at the private scan last time and actually this is my final shot, I cant stand the thought of a 4th mc so there’s no point saying they’ll scan me after 3 mc. I’m 40 later this year so this preganacy is my last go before then. Me and my OH agreed this 3rd attempt (at our third child I should add, I’m extremely lucky to have two wonderful ds already) would be our last. The stress of mc and hiding it from our children each time is too much to go through again. Hopefully she’ll be kind and offer me a reassurance scan at EPU.

TheImprobableGirl · 12/04/2018 19:48

@BadBadBeans that sounds almost exactly like mine (This was 9+3) - browny string in cm when wiping, then red blood onto a pad, then tiny clots, period achy pains, quite an uncomfortable 'low' pressure, more red blood, sometimes no blood when wiping but then it came more next wee - constant 'wet' period feeling (sorry if tmi)

Rang midwife who referred to the EPU, they rang me back at 8:45 the next morning with a cancellation for the following day - achy period pains and cramps still persisting, blood when wiping, sometimes red, sometimes brown streaked.

The advice was if it was 'heavy' (saturating the pad within half an hour) then go straight to a and e, otherwise just sit and wait (and cry if you are anything like me)

Well, obviously I had my scan and the baby was wriggling about and the EPU nurse just said it was things getting into place! It is almost exactly the same as my experience a week ago, the aches and pains have gone now, and not experienced any spotting since - ironically panic and stress can cause extra tummy cramps too.

Keep your phone on loud, EPU will probably call back first thing when they get to the clinic, whether they can fit you in asap or in a day - but please keep in mind I had a very positive outcome with heartbeat and wriggles, with the exact same symptoms.

Also, try not to google - it'll be hard but there are better and worse stories out there, it isn't necessarily complementary with those of us experiencing those particular set of symptoms!

TheImprobableGirl · 12/04/2018 19:57

@Emelene glad you are low risk - will you be opting for a Birth Centre? I would love to be in midwife led care, it just isn't meant to be :)

@Nocatshere it is probably not very ethical... but if they still refuse to scan you could you not say you were experiencing some spotting/feeling cramps? I think they should scan you anyway, and you fully deserve to BE scanned - I feel that prenatal mental health is almost as taboo as postnatal mental health used to be (I'm from a mental health background - putting ladies with postnatal depression into hospital with 'hysteria' anyone?!) but sometimes it takes a while for the real world to catch up.

If it means your mental health would be in a better place, then this is AS IMPORTANT as physical health (i.e. spotting/cramps) so if I had to bend the truth to get what was needed within the NHS then I could make that call

Emelene · 12/04/2018 20:00

@TheImprobableGirl - yes I think a birth centre. Ours is next door to the obstetric led unit so if anything goes wrong I can be whisked next door to theatres / baby to NICU etc.

I'm just hoping I can get through without any of the complications my poor mum had. Fingers crossed! Smile