Thread no.2 for babies due April 2018

[boatrace30]

Hi all, I thought I'd start another thread. Hope you find it!

Thats really tough MissYeti.
I would add that he may feel differently when the baby is here. My DH hates to be away for any period of time (he has a 1 week residential trip once a year and hates it). And if he is away for months in the first year he would miss so much.
Plus - I'm not going to lie, I'd have found life incredibly hard with him (well I still would!)
I completely understand why you are upset. I assume there is no way you could go with him?

MrsDeeds - Hope your GP sorted you out with some antibiotics!

@MissYeti my oh works away for half the year it's not actually that bad he gets lots of time at home so probably more time than working office hours!

@MissYeti that sucks, as much as I would normally be all for the opportunity - in normal circumstances a little bit of time and distance away can do you good! But I think it's a bit harsh when you're pregnant, it is the one time in your life where you do actually need to be careful and have someone look after you for a change.

How long would he be away? You said months....would he be back in time for the birth?

If it were my hubby he would only see his point of view until his mates told him the cons (the exact same ones I'd tell him! 🤦🏼‍♀️) and then he'd think about it clearer but it's hard if his family are also pushing for it, he's not going to get many people him telling him the downside other than you and unfortunately you just seem like a nag (even though you aren't and your points are very valid!)

Hope he comes to his senses soon!

On a side note, I woke up feeling tons better and didn't ring the GP in the end...maybe the dentist did know what they were on about 😳

I will add that I took a 5 month job abroad and it only made me and DH more inseparable, the space was nice and made us appreciate each other but neither of us were in a time of need!

I booked an early gender scan 😬

@MissYeti that's really difficult. I've had the same with my DH ever since moving back to the UK after being persuaded to work abroad for 5 years. At the time I'm really glad we did it but there weren't any children involved and I always said I'd be back in the UK the second we either got pregnant or any close family members became ill. It sounds like it's different for you though if you'd not be together? I had a lot of friends with young families when I was abroad and they all moved back for their oldest to start school in the UK.

Sorry, probably not helpful, but know how you must be feeling right now and hope you can both come to an agreement soon. I have promised that we'll go back abroad once all our kids are through uni as that feels like the only next time I'll be ready

Thank you for all the replies. I'm currently in my last year at uni so going with him isn't an option until at least after birth as uni finishes in May next year and it would be very disruptive to travel with him anyway as the work is inconsistent in length and often involved going from one country to another when jobs start straight after the other is finished.

When he comes back he plans to work evenings to keep money coming in which means if I have a regular 9-5 job I won't see him at all for the duration of the time he is at home.

For me it just doesn't work out to be a healthy relationship and its not the type of inconsistent environment I'd be happy to bring a baby into.

Had my scan today.
Had been terrified something was wrong as had had next to no symptoms but Bean is there and a wriggler.
Due date now two days earlier.

Any nub guesses?

It's a tough one MissYeti - DH worked abroad for two years. We saw each other every few months for about a week (longer at Christmas), and knew all along the contract was just for 2 years. We got through it ok, and it certainly didn't change our relationship in the slightest. I would feel different about it now that we're expecting though, I have to say. Does he have opportunities if he stays here?

My nausea has really eased off which is great, but my tiredness has ramped right up. Really struggling to make it through the day atm.

Lovely scan Fairfax! No idea about the nub, still don't really get it! Are you going to get another scan to find out?
My sickness has totally come back. Nausea morning and night with a nice few hours off through the middle of the day. Sick twice in the past couple of days - second trimester is not looking too much better than the first for me! Miss yeti, that sounds really tough and he isn't thinking about you and baby in this, could he give it a couple years til baby is a here and old enough that he isn't missing too much milestones when he is away? Hope you manage to sort things out with his job soon

Hi everyone. Just had my 12 week scan but as I’ve already had my Panorama test results, it was a very quick scan and booking in for 20 week one. I’m also in Hampshire and close to a few of you!

I will guess a boy FairfaxAikman.

It looks like loads of us live nearby as I am also in Hampshire.

That's a great scan @FairfaxAikman! I'd have a little guess at a little boy too. Can't wait to find out if we are right on any of these 😁
Do you feel a sense of relief now after a successful scan?

@ScarletSienna is the Panorama test the same as the Harmony test? I know it has multiple names but I get confused!

Yeah, feeling a lot better. We even got a little wave.

I also think a boy from the nub and the flatter skull shape.

Seems almost unanimously a boy.

Out at dinner with in laws to tell them tonight. Have roped in a waiter who is going to put a special token on the bill plate.
They are also just putting coke in my “rum and cokes”

Oh wow how weird that loads of us are so nearby! Although tbh I didn't realise til I moved here how big Hampshire is geography's not my best subject!

MissYeti that's tough. I think I'd feel the same as you - I'd want DH nearby. Mine worked away when I was pregnant with DC2, but he was still in the same country and back at weekends so slightly different, plus subsequent pregnancies are very different than the first. Really he needs to be around to support you. But then on the flip side it really, really sucks to have to worry about money when you have a child - if it's just you two it's one thing, but when you have a little person depending on you it does change things. So if it's the case that you'd struggle financially if he doesn't go, it would be more of a decision iyswim? Hard one!

Fairfax lovely scan! Glad all is well, you're clearly just one of the lucky ones when it comes to pregnancy! I'm guessing boy but not based on nub (rubbish at that!), just my general feeling

Liv I also seem to have replaced nausea with tiredness. Not great with 2 other kids to deal with! I spend most days thanking god I'm a SAHM, I literally have no idea how I would manage having to work feeling like this! I said to my friend the other day, I feel like I could sleep for a hundred years and then I could function no problem.

Sienna nice to have another peek at baby anyway!

Can't believe there are people nearly at gender scan stage! I'm still waiting not very patiently for my 12 week scan! Next Thursday at 12+4. Feels so far away still!

Actually spoke to my paternal Gran today (I’m NC with the female parental unit and her family) and she said she didn’t get sick in any of her three pregnancies - unless you count one occasion of seasickness in a rowing boat.

@MrsDneedsaB, it’s the same sort of thing but can be done a week earlier than the Harmony test. We were asked if we wanted to know the sex and we did which I’m loving as we have a name picked already and have told our son that the baby will be his brother.

@Fairfax great that you’ve got the waiter in on your plan!

Had to. Not ordering alcohol would raise suspicion so I am asking for rum and coke but they are just bringing me coke.

Fairfax I'd agree, looks like a boy to me!

I'm hoping We get to have a go at nub theory guessing our baby next week!! I'm so excited, been counting down the days since I got the letter!

Money isn't really an issue, due to circumstances we're living at my parents house at the moment anyway (I'm 27, feel like a massive burden) so it's not like we have to find money for rent and bills and such. We had a chat about it this morning where I suggested holding fire for a couple years, that way he won't miss anything, we can support each other and if he still wants to do it we can reevaluate things then.

FourForYouGlenCoco Hampshire might be big but we are in the same town.

I'm in West Sussex so also not a million miles away!

Wilda of central scotland here

Nickmylipple I'm in w.Sussex too!