May 2017 #15 No sleep, night feeds and the newest arrivals

[Tickyboovicki]

Fingers crossed this works, no idea how to make a thread but giving it my best shot. Let the May babies continue!

Is anyone else doing the three hour feed battle to combat jaundice? It's wiping us out here but little mans jaundice I think (hope) is improving

@BouncingBlueberry - I'm demand feeding and we have jaundice but I can say it's not made the slightest bit of difference. He still had to go for bloods, which were fine and he's still a touch off colour.
I changed from 4hr to 2hr with my daughter who went straight into her rhythm, it messed us right up. I only did it for 2 days. Plus I never wake them at night either. Life's hard enough with a newborn!

I've been waking baby Fox (which goes against everything I believe in ) because I wake up within such massive painful leaky boobs!

That's interesting fox and wish. I've been waking baby Bees too. Partly because my engorged boobs wake me up, and partly because the midwife said not to go more than 4 hours between feeds. I would prefer to feed on demand as I did with dd1, but it was never an issue with her. She did little else apart from demand to be fed at night!

I tried waking LittlePippin to feed but he wouldn't take a full feed if I did that, so I figured it wasn't actually getting more milk into him. The HV suggested doing nappy changes mid feed instead of beforehand in order to keep him more awake for the second half, so we are trying that!

I am now on my third type of antibiotic for this episiotomy infection.

@bouncingblueberry, baby crazy was jaundiced (had horrific birth) and I had to wake him to feed every 2 hours. He is still a bit yellow (mainly head and chest - rest normal..!!) But he has been diagnosed with "breast milk jaundice" which can last to 12 weeks of age.

I find this article helpful if you haven't already been there/read it

www.laleche.org.uk/jaundice/

@crazyzooo that's a really helpful article, thank you. I've got slow let down and an impatient baby who gets himself into a frenzy so we are having to top up. Funding it very demoralising right now and tearing myself apart thinking I should just go to formula to help reduce his and my stress levels.

@crazyzooo we also have breast milk jaundice. BabyTea is 7 weeks old today and still looks pretty yellow to me though people who haven't seen him for a day or two always comment that it's looking better.

It's so tiring isn't it @BouncingBlueberry apart from that do you feel the feeding is going well?

Sometimes I fantasise about changing to formula! And this is coming from someone who has fed her other babies until they were 1-2 years. I think it's partly exhaustion but also a slightly trapped feeling. And it does pass I felt like that with the others too. But equally you can change to bottles of you wish, baby will get fed regardless. Any amount of time breastfeeding is beneficial.

@bouncingblueberry do what's right for you, there appear to be plenty of other things to feel guilty about as a new mum and you have to look after yourself!!

How old is baby blueberry? If It's any help I am starting to feel BF is getting less confusingly bloody difficult easier at 5 weeks... And I keep @tea diagram in mind.

I joined the le leche league local FB page and they are so helpful (leaders and other mums) and also called one of the BF councillors during a very dark moment. They got me through so may be worth a go (if you want to )?

I dream of 3-4 hours between feeds! I think we average an hour, although last night we had two chunks of 2.5 hours (punches air in hope!)
I've been really trying to ebf but it's wrecking my health and recovery as the Windows of sleep are so short, so one or two if the twenty thousand feeds a day are formula. Have an electric pump arriving today in the hope I can express successfully and baby can have me in a bottle instead...

Just spent an hour and a half with the loveliest Midwife on the Birth Centre discussing my options.

She's going to email me a plan tomorrow and assign me to a consultant. But... provided I don't need to have the drip and I don't have hyperstimulation with contractions she is happy for me to stay on the Birth Centre.

I'll be induced as an outpatient on Monday and if no spontaneous labour by Tuesday I'll be admitted to MAU on Tuesday and moved to the MLU to deliver only being transferred should any medical intervention be required.

She also offered to do a sweep today rather than tomorrow morning - which was successful! She could feel babies head, cervix is still a tad long, around 3cm but softening nicely. Bloody show immediately from it which she said was a good sign.

Spoke to my community MW who has said if I don't labour by Sunday then I can call her and go for a 4th and final sweep then before induction on Monday.

Feeling a million times better after all of that and actually looking forward to what's to come now! 😊

Excellent news raspberry. Sounds like you won't need that induction after all.

Mighty you will get there. This bit honestly does end, and soon. Is he having more than the 8-12 feeds in 24 hours then?

Currently in the middle of a very fussy cluster feed. Baby Bees fussy period coincides almost perfectly with the start of dd1's bedtime. No idea how I'm going to sort both when she goes back to work.

@mightymouse76 mine is the same, only goes about an hour between feeds. My poor poor boobs!

Good luck @RasperryInAMelon! Hope things get moving quickly for you

Good luck @RasperryInAMelon hope little raspberry gets a wriggle on.

Best of luck raspberry!

Just had a text from a friend who delivered her baby at home alone with her dh last night - no time for midwife or even ambulance! Blimey!

Just wondering, when we talk about time between breastfeeds, is it from the start or end of the feed? For instance, if she fed from 1-1.45 and then again at 4, has she gone 3 hours?

@Sipperskipper I think I count from the end. Particularly if it's a long one - if she's fed for 45 minutes I want max recovery time!

@skipperskipper you are supposed to count from the beginning of the feed.
Baby Moo has is just 200g off his birth weight at 8 days old. MW seemed very impressed I am BFing only since being discharged from hospital. She said I can just feed on demand now instead of timed feedings which I am very happy about!

Thanks ladies. I'm feeding on demand so not needing to wake her etc, and if I time from the start of a feed shes going 3-3.5 hours or so between feeds.....but they are all pretty long (45 mins or so!)

@RasperryInAMelon good luck! We're rooting for you and all the other June babies.

@EsmesBees thankyou...it doesn't feel like it but logically I know you're right! He has been feeding approx 15-18 times a day, although I think we might have had a mini (mighty) breakthrough yesterday after our lovely HV spent 2 hours with us, showing me how he roots for comfort due to his awful wind, rather than for hunger. It was a relief for someone trained to acknowledge his discomfort and problems settling- I just thought he was difficult/I was a crap mum on all levels (not satisfying him milk wise, not winding him enough, not coping with the sleep deprivation etc, etc)

So instead of just sticking a boob in him, we spent over an hour trying out different comforting and wind easing holds and techniques to try and stretch the time between feeds.

I also decided to try a pacifier- controversial I know, but it transformed our night last night- massively reduced the escalation of the crying and he self settled 3 times in a row without having to be fed to sleep. He also slept for 2.5 to 3 hours, 3 times!!! I feel slightly more sane again today- enough so that we're going to brave ikea and I will try to travel back on the train and bus with him so DP can fit much needed furniture in the car. Big day!

In all seriousness, although I joke around on here the HV and midwife team supporting us are all aware I have been struggling psychologically so I think the concession of a dummy is one of several suggestions to try and preserve my ability to care for him properly and not spiral further. I know I had a complicated pregnancy and not the most straightforward recovery. Combine that with pressure to work through this period, and living in a money-pit of a house renovation that takes all DP's time and energy has been and is still a huge ongoing stress. Thing is I don't know any different, so when I'm falling apart I need to remind myself that I'm actually doing ok considering (chants @teainbed 's mantra)

Sorry that turned into a cathartic confessional...

to everyone also struggling with the new household anarchy! 

@Rabbitykins55 quick nipple tip...another lactation consultant I saw during the tongue tie procedure looked at my nipples, reached into her cabinet and pulled out an extra virgin olive oil spray, which she squirted into my breast pads! I have to say it does help - I've now got a bottle by my bedside 

@MissMooMoo @Sipperskipper @MrsJW15 that's interesting re timings. Mine only feeds for 10-20 mins max so it doesn't affect it too much!

Moo that's great re birthweight 💪🏼
Mini is up by 500g now at day 24, I can feel him getting heavier!

On a tiny achievements note, I was terribly proud of myself for getting me breakfast ready with one hand this morning, including opening and closing a bag of frozen berries with one of those annoying wire ties.

Feeding myself was slightly less successful though:

mighty we've been using a dummy since we left hospital, as she was nursing literally 24/7. A midwife suggested it, and it saved our lives! I would have given up on bf otherwise I think! It certainly hasn't affected her feeding - she weighed 9lb15 yesterday at 18 days old (birth weight was 9lb4).

I just think if it works, do it!

Mighty - I am was against dummies, I think they look awful in every photo and I dreaded the future battle to remove them... DD would never take one anyway, and frequent change of position along with gripe water and up and down the stairs until my legs gave in eventually settled her wind. Those first few weeks were a killer. Luckily I had help on hand in the form of a live in mum for the first 5 weeks! No such luck this time and DH hunted out a dummy a couple of weeks ago. We now have 3. DH uses them more to settle him, I've just been feeding him if it's been more than an hour... although he's 6 weeks old tomorrow - Oh My Gosh! - and I need to start to get him into a bit of a routine for my sanity! DH works away mon-thurs and I only get 4hrs with DD at nursery so I need to start fitting in things other than cuddles! So the dummies will be coming out in force to try and settle to 4 hour timed feeds... we'll be going for the 3-7-11 timings I think - that should fit in really well. x
So please don't despair! A dummy for a few hours comfort and peace is Not a bad thing! Even though I was stuck up and always thought it was ! Every baby is different! xx

@mightymouse76 he had lost 9% but I wasn't surprised as we had a rough start to breastfeeding,he was in special care etc. MW who came to the house was basically pushing formula without actually saying it but I went to the clinic yesterday and they were happy with him. I also said directly that I wasn't changing our feeding arrangements.

BabyMoo also has a dummy. He loves it so I am going with it.

What a super sounding health visitor @mightymouse76 help like that is worth its weight in gold! It's hard to distinguish between hunger and other cries at this stage.

Nothing against dummies, I've tried them with all of my DC but they just spat them out! They have all sucked their thumbs by 2-3 months though. It's good to have something other than a boob to calm them.

We seem to be in a pattern of 2-3 ok ish nights then 1 bad one. Last night was the bad one.