DANGER: Wide Load - due in April 2007

[Katy44]

Morning all, just about.

SOSPL- sorry to hear you had such a bad nights sleep.

I feel really down today
Had a huge fight with DH yesterday, he came home waffelling on about a house he wants us to buy and all the work that he will be doing on it.
I know it sound silly and I probably over reacted but I don't want to have to think about shit like that at the moment, for one thing this house is no where near finished and I have just about got our room ready for the babies, and what with all the other crap that has been going on this week I really just didn't want to talk aboout it.
So he got all shitty with me and started to lecture me at which point I burst into tears, and that just seemed to piss him off even more.
I don't know why but I just couldn't stop crying and so i turned round to him and said "why am I married to a man I can't even talk to" so he said "You can talk to me" so I started and I really opened up to him about all my fears basically everything I have been feeling recently about not being ready and not knowing how I am going to cope with 3 kids on my own while he is off doing all his building work all the time etc etc.
At which point he turned round to me and said "shut up don't be so silly"

Not really the reasurance i was looking for and to make me feel even better rather than giving me a hug and telling me everything is going to be ok he fucked off across the other side of the room and ignored me for the rest of the night, which then left me in an even worse state than I was before, with a pounding headache and BH all night.

He is such a selfish wanker sometime.

Sorry about that I just needed to get it off my chest, even though it has started me off crying again, so doubt when he comes back he will have yet another go at me.

1b3 - sorry you had a rotten evening, have you and dh talked about it again this morning? It seems like he is really blocking out your repeated attempts to explain that you are scared about how you are going to cope.. just from other things you have said before about plans to buy houses/build/ have dn to stay etc etc. Is he in a bit of denial himself? Is there any way you can try and sit down with him and have a calm chat about it without getting upset? Or is that impossible at this point? (believe me I would understand if it was!)

I think a lot of guys immediately feel put out when our tears come out, sometimes they seem to think it´s us ´turning on the waterworks´ to get sympathy or win points so if you can try and talk to him without getting upset might it help?

Yes he IS being an unsensitive git but maybe he´s secretly worried too?

Sorry if this is all missing the mark but at any rate, know we are all hear to listen if you want to rant some more

Oh what a rotten evening 1b3
Hugs.
We are aproaching a house move and I would not wish it on ANYBODY let alone someone who is having twins.
You are doing so well and have had a hard enough week without this.
More hugs

1b3, sorry about your dh, poor you. Hope he treats you better later.

It's bad enough when they don't get it but you have so much on with the house, a little one to look after and 2 on the way. It's no wonder you're worried

1b3, I am so sorry that you had such a rubbish evening. Men are hopeless sometimes, and really haven't a clue. Hope things are better today.

Hugs.

Hope everyone else is ok. I feel ok. Not much time to relax though and taking B to a party shortly. Not sure how she will be as it is a party mostly of 2 year olds, and as she is nearly 4, she gets quite frustrated with them! Hope we won't have any scenes!

I just can't talk to the man, he is off in his own little world where the only thing's that really matter is what he is doing. Everyone else has to just fall in line so that he can get on and do what he thinks is important.

I don't even want to try and talk to him because I know what he will say, and it will be the same old crap that he always comes out with, which is we have to do things his way as that is the only way that anything will work because he is GOD!

It is so nice knowing that nothing anyone ever does for him is good enough, including his own wife.

Sorry to go on about it but it has really upset me that he can be so insensitive.

Afternoon all

Have a headache and bit of a temp - so not even dressed yet - dh in charge!

Had contractions for two hours 10 mins apart last night - not just tightenings but the whole wave thing going on - knew it wasn't the real thing when settled down and was just practise ones but did bring it all back! Had to breathe through them too - good practise

1B3 - hope you sort things out with dh xoxox

Flumpootle - where exactly do you live then - thought you were in Swindon? Chippenham is nice to go back to - but if its busy won;t stay long - other peoples babies crying is just too much for me to cope with! Had my own room at Bath last time and in Chippenham the first time - so will make sure I remember to ask again!

I have a tens machine that I used when buggered my back up - have bought some new pads - planning to use it all the way through. Someone said yonks ago about some tens not being suitable for birth - but surely they all do the same thing???

Birdie - great news about finishing work - cheers!

Need to go back to bed and look ill again or dh will think I am putting it on!

BTW - my sister is selling a set of 12 mothereae birth to potty nappies and a whole bunch of wraps - motherease and kushies ones - will get a full list. Email me if you are interested and I will put you in touch.

Hi all.
Octo, hope you feel better soon. I will be using tens too which I am hiring from the physio dept in the local hospital. There are some tens which arent suitable for labour but I have absolutely no idea why that would be.

MMk, I am getting a bit stressed about being away from ds too when I go into hospital. Not much we can do about it really though I suppose.

Runny, I am with the penybont team and everyone I have encountered have been lovely so hoping for someone I like to be at the birth!!

Octo, can sympathise on the head lice front. Ds has had them a couple of times, I have never caught them but it makes me paranoid and I scratch just thinking about it!

Emmy, great news about your scan, must be a load off your mind.

SOSPL, I have used stuff called quit nits on ds when he had lice. Its a thick cream and is made from natural oils including lavender and sandalwood. Its actually fine to use and has been really effective. They also make a spray for the hair which the nits seemingly dont like and it acts as a repellent. Its not cheap (around 10 pounds for a small bottle) but it is really good so maybe worth a try for Becky rather than the chemical ones.

1b3, sorry your dh is being a pita. I think it is a male trait to be honest. Agree with whoever said about us turning on the waterworks. I think they just cant cope with surging hormones and everything getting just a bit too much at the moment. Hope you can sort things out with him.

Hope you are all ok. I was up with niggly pains overnight which I took paracetamol for eventually but nothing today. Have had my hair cut which revealed far too many grey hairs so have been sat with hair dye on my head for the last half hour!

I have worked it out my DH is plain stooopid.

He just came in and asked me what my poblem is, so I explained that I'm just going through a bit of a hormonal patch and need his support not being told to "shut up" and "stop being silly" I said all this in the most diploamatic way I could so as to not start things off again.
He then turned round and said "I'm so fed up of you telling me I'm selfish"
Which bugger me I wasn't trying to say that at all I was just asking for a bit of support.

Anyway I could feel myself welling up again so I grabbed some tissue and went to calm down and stop crying in the utlitly room so I didn't get him upset, at which point DH then appears there shouts at me for crying slams the door and walks off WTF

So I managed to calm myself down and stop crying I walked back into the lounge and just had to say in my friendliest non patronising voice "Are you F***G mad you have been through 4 pregnancies now and you still haven't got a clue about hormones and pregnent women"

He has just asked me what I am doing "telling them I mental"
"No I think the words i used were plain stooopid."
That seems to have broken the ice, thanks for all nice comments think the drama is over now.

1b3, oh dear what a to do. Hope all is resolved now.

Mammyjo, thanks for the note re quitnits. Did you just buy it from Boots or is it an internet buy?

Just back from the party, and all was well - B not too obnoxious with the younger children. Feel absolutely knackered though now and looking forward to bed time already!

1B3 - honey. I am sorry you have been having "one of those days" with DH - I know I am not expecting twins, but I do have two v.young ones and another on the way and I am feeling v.hormonal and tired right now. DH hates it when I cry or get upset with him / in general - he can't cope at all and gets all personal and in a complete grump. He snaps at me and ignores me and turns his back on me etc I don't get any understanding or sympathy at all and I find it so hard. I don't know if my sharing that helps you; but I do understand sweetie! [[hugs] Hope you have a much better evening....

Another lovely day - went swimming this pm - feeling exhausted now....

DP's eh, who'd have em?!! hope it's a bit better now 1b3

Ah, it's bedtme for dd, thank goodness for that. We're having burgers and chips for dinner, yum! Am really hungry as had lunch at 11.30 as been up since 6.30!!! That feels like a very long time ago now.

Got to go to my dad's tomorrow with dd. DH was coming but more house stuff has come up and this has to be the last day before baby arrives as next week is mothers day and the week after is our goddaughters christening, week after that is the day before due date so don;t want anyone here(he only gets sundays off).

I've not been to dad's (and step mothers) without anyone else being there, either my brother, sister or step brother or step sister, so not sure how i'll cope???!! Step mother can be a little too much sometimes and not sure if my pg mouth will not say something it shouldn't For example my sister went there the other week and walked in the house with our step brother, step mother says to step brother, 'you've put on weight' not hello lovely to see you, haven't seen you since xmas!!! Oh well best not to dwell. Will let you know if she says anything like ususal!

Eddas - good luck! I'm not feeling particularly tolerant at the moment so avoiding all relatives! DH going down to Plymouth tomorrow for the FA Cup Quarter finals on his own - his parents live there and I have opted out of evening with MIL. Everyone has to pray we beat Watford tomorrow then can go in for a bit of Giant killing! DH mega excited!

1B3 - glad things are better

DH has just made me a lovely dinner and feeling okay - going to have bath and return to bed! But not til have had PUDDING - dh and boys have made some kind of citrus sponge bake thing.

Thought of a slighty amusing postnatal thread title : Downsize me!

Pudding is ready .... yummmmmmmmmyyyyyyy

Fingers crossed for the footie!

Bed is calling me too, but haven't seen dh for what seems like forever, so may wait a while

1B3 - glad it´s blown over and you sound like you feel a bit better x

Octo - sorry you aren´t feeling too well, make the most of it getting spoilt by your boys - you know it won´t last long! and don´t even TRY and tempt me with more nappies you evil minx.

Enjoy the rellies tomorrow Eddas! I´ve got the whole IL clan coming over again, seems like we did lunch a little too well last time so it´s another 11 people over for lunch.. this time my mum and dad are coming which will be particularly exhausting as they don´t speak spanish and the rest of the family don´t speak english so I will be having my name called left right and centre for translations. Euuuuuurgh. On the plus side, MIL is making paella..mmmmmmm..

11 people who don;t all speak the same language???!!! Think you win over my day tomorrow, best of luck!!

Will be trying to get a date out of my dad to finish off painting the nursery, then i can get step father in law(we have a complicated family!) to do the flooring. Do you think it's insensitive to ask him to do it on mothers day!!!

no way! help him make it a lovely mother´s day for you by suggesting a handy task!

quick poll for experienced mum´s ... will just cotton wool and water get meconium off okay? Did a search but some people seem to say yes and others say no, yet not keen to use disposable wipes at all...help?

Maveta, with dd her first nappy was changed by a mw as i'd never changed one before so she showed me how to do it, luckily that was the one with the meconium so wouldn't know!!! But she did use cotton wool and water so sure that will do. I guess i won't have that excuse this time round!! Am taking wipes this time, cannot do the cotton wool, not even taking it with me this time.

Maveta I've used flannels on DD and boil wash. She's had a lot less bum rashes than DS who I used disp wipes on.

I can't remember who had nits but yuk, i'm itchy just thinking of them I just comb and comb and comb again.

1B3 hope everything is sorted for you, men just don't get it, how ever many times you tell them

Octo ooh more nappies but I don't know what DH would say, he got his credit card bill and he queried it with the fraud dept only to discover it was me buying baby stuff on ebay. Only smallish amounts but about 30 of them his bill was 3 pages long. He was not amused

Have had lovely bath, self tanned and done nails - think contortionist. You will all be pleased to hear that I didn't find any headlice! didn;t get round to ladygarden though - but has been some time ....

Maveta - I use little flannels as wipes and chuck them in with my nappies to wash. Cotton wool does stick to meconium and it can get quite messy and then you have to decide what you are going to do with the cotton wool esp if using cloth! Fragrance free baby wipes are fine to use - some of the better known brands contain alot of perfume which can irritate little bottoms which is why they recommend using water. I have a pack of bambino mio wipes in my hosp bag.

maveta again - good lord - you could say anything to your inlaws and they would have no idea - bloody fantastic!

Off to surf baby shooping sites - have seen one advertised called www.cowsaymoo.co.uk which think has cute unneccessary clothes on!

www.cowsaysmoo.co.uk - very cute - similar to lulasapphire and babyangels

Had back ache all day and been having very painful tightenings all evening, low down, and it feels like someone is prodding my nether regions with a red hot poker

If this isn't it, it is exciting none the less as things must be moving in the right direction, no?

Would think this was it if they were more regular.

You've all gone to the pub AGAIN - I knew it - get me one in

WCL - mines doing the same - hence not asleep yet ....!