caterpillars - your DH thinks you need to man up?! FFS. HE NEEDS TO MAN UP. What an inconsiderate selfish arse. Sorry to say it but there you are.
He knows you have previously suffered with MH? He must surely know pg and labour is a huge trigger for MH issues? There isplenty of press recently saying 20% of mums suffer with MH during pregnancy and in the 1st year after birth and that suicide is the biggest killer of new mums. Good god. The man needs to grow a pair and show some compassion and be more supportive.
Do you have anyone you can talk to?
You are not failing in any way. What you are experiencing is totally and utterly normal!!!
Can you get an emergency appointment with your MW or GP tomorrow? (definitely before Christmas). You need support and they may also be able to help you articulate to your beloved how blardy hard growing another human can be. Many many women feel like crap from the start of their pg until around 20/22 weeks. Then they sometimes feel lovely for about 8-16 weeks before the descent to B day arrives.
If he thinks you are bad now, Christ he is going to struggle when you are 35 weeks. At that point with DS I would burst into tears and languish on the sofa for hours just because my DH had said "How much?!" re what I had spent at Sainsburys that day :)
Might also be worth signing up for some NCT classes asap so he can feel more involved and you can look forward to him meeting other dads to be who can give him the low down on how bad their other halves have been. He will then realise what an arse he has been.
Our NCT class with DS in 2012 was also quite a turning point for every single man in the room. There is a section where the leader shows the room pictures (life size) of a woman's insides during pg. At the 5month mark everything is looking pretty squiushed and she asks the guys how pregnant this woman is..... they all say she is about to give birth. When she reveals it is only about half way they all audibly gasp.... she then shows month by month until the end. Every single woman in that class later agreed that their man was a helluva lot more sympathetic and considerate for the rest of the pregnancy!!!!! Men are visual. If they cannot see the problem they dont understand it.
hope you get the support yuo need. Try to be easy on yourself. We are not superwomen and one of the last taboos in this modern era is to share publicly how blardy hard pregnancy can be.