February 2016 Halfway mark: Flutters into kicks into thwacks!

[haquoi123]

New thread, heeeeeeere we go!!

Some of you have had some terrible birthing experiences, you poor things!

am currently feigning ignorance that I will have to do it and instead am pretending that a stork may indeed bring my baby instead whilst I lay with a cold compress on my head waiting for him to arrive..... a girl can dream right?

So I actually cried at your birthing stories for you ladies! Overly emotional much?!!

So what actually goes into a hospital bag? Anyone recommend some cheap nursing sleepwear? It seems ridiculously expensive when I've just googled.

Primark. Pyjamas with shirts for tops are really cheap (£8ish) and I've already started hoarding them

I am not always excited but I do feel pretty good. Just can't take a complement (in any aspect of life) so seem to be projecting some kind of misery whenever people congratulate me & I can't really work out why.

I am pretty scared of delivery but had to deliver some as a student - some births are awesome and mine may be one. I have seen a woman deliver an 11lb 2 oz babe on gas and air with 2 stitches. Denial is probably a decent form of coping as long as you have a bit of visualisation I your back pocket

In terms of my bag I have a lot of control freak stuff planned. Will definitely take pillows as the NHS never has enough. I don't wear night clothes normally so have bought 2 huge cotton nighties wih buttons at the top. They are grandma material but will do for hospital and never be worn again. I plan to labour in a massive tee shirt. I see no point in spending loads of money on nice stuff cos I won't be wearing it at home.

25 weeks now and actually feel well. Bubs has moved so kicks now nice not painful. Back ache a bit better. Energy good. I know in a couple of weks it may go down hill again but feel pretty cheerful right now. I hope that those of you feeling a bit naff can get some of this too :)

I've got a hospital bag spreadsheet I'll stick on here or the fb site if you like?

Ooh yes please Jelly - can you please put it on both as there are some FB girls who don't come on here since the hacking thing. Thanks

ratty I have no plan, nor tbh any intention to make one! Ignorance is bliss....

I'll do it first thing tomorrow morning :)

Well just for balance I'll say that I've had two long (especially the first) labours which were not exactly sunshine and rainbows but certainly not traumatic and I look back on them with really positive feelings. (Also no stiches either time!)

With DD I felt the rush of love instantly and I think it knocked my socks off in a way that could never happen again because it was the first time I'd ever experienced feeling love. Obviously I "loved" my parents and siblings but that was all bound up with guilt and shame and loads of dysfunctional stuff so when I met DD I was blown away by the purity of the emotion.

So with DS while I loved him immediately it wasn't such a shock to me, iykwim.

Wow not been on for ages, that took some catching up! Glad everyone's ok still, but ignoring how much shopping has been done - I've not got a thing so far! Really need to get into the loft and see what we have leftover from DS.

Quick question re movements-I'm still feeling quite a lot of movements if I stop and think about it, but they're definitely softer than they were last week. Anyone got similar? I'm guessing that it's just baby moving position or something, but getting a little worried as it's been like it a few days.

Oh and on the bonding thing - it took me nearly a year to actually feel the rush of love . I felt massively protective immediately, and felt a need to provide for DS etc straight away, but no real love for a looooong time!

To add further balance, both my labours, in two different hospitals, were fine and I had good aftercare in both too (although I opted to stay in only for 6 hours so no idea how it would have been for an extended stay).

First labour, worst thing was having diarrhoea which the poor midwife had to collect and dispose of. Second labour the worst thing was being told they wanted to transfer me to another hospital when I was already in transition (I refused).

No need for special nursing nightwear, just vest tops you can pull down or shirt type tops that open at the front. I have some soft crop tops to wear at night to keep the pads in place (big leaker). Another thing I do is to have a potty training mat on the bed nearer d-day to protect the mattress if my waters go and then have it under boob area once baby is here until I stop leaking milk everywhere (I have washable mats but you can buy disposable).

Loving the baby. First baby I just looked at her and thought 'there you are', huge surge of recognition and love. Second baby I loved but it was different. Was a difficult baby and it definitely took me longer to bond. Part of the reason I wanted to know the sex of this one was that I did with first and not with second and in my head that was a factor in the delayed bonding (logically I know it had nothing to do with it but anyway)

Feeling really low this morning. Just the general discomfort of pregnancy and having to keep positive and the latest setback /surprise of my cervix, I'm not sure how I can cope with it any more. I'm so exhausted by it all emotionally. And I don't feel like i can be negative because I need my little boy to survive and I'm so lucky to be getting a second chance, it feels like looking a gift horse in the mouth. On the other side, I had the best nights sleep last night - actually felt comfortable. So maybe I should just get up and face the day

Aww haqoi don't beat yourself up, I think preggo hormones are horrible things for most of us, let alone for those of you who have suffered a loss. You are going to have a baby boy in a few short months time. Just focus on that fact. He only needs a little bit more baking to be ready. Big hugs.

I managed another ok nights sleep. Yay!

Had a scare yesterday when I thought my waters had broken (they haven't and I was only in hospital for a couple of hours); I casually phoned the midwife expecting her to say monitor the leakage for 24/48 hours or something but she transferred my call directly to the hospital...and they said to come straight in. Luckily my house is half way between my office and the hospital so I could drive by and pick up my notes but just made me think maybe if your house and hospital are in different directions it might be worth carrying your notes on you? I'm definitely getting a hospital bag ready this weekend just in case I get admitted for anything. It was scary being on my own, but I went to a friends house straight after for pizza and a film.

I had a sneaky ultrasound which was lovely, the doctor kept referring to the baby as a "he" so now I'm convinced I'm having a boy and he's going to be the spitting image of his father :( :( :( just praying that if it is a boy he turns out like MY father who was just the best dad ever (passed away January 2011 from MND). What a rollercoaster of emotions pregnancy is!

haquoi I agree with jelly - hormones and worries can make you feel so up & down. Be strong - not much longer to go. Hug for you.

Nice to see some more positive stories too! And v interesting stories re bonding - names me feel less weird for worrying about that!

haq don't feel like you need to "stay strong", it's ok to be really upset and distraught and cry for a whole day. Can you take tomorrow off? If you're tired things are a thousand times worse. What plans have you got for the weekend?

sorry ratty cross post!

calypso oh my god how scary! what made you think your waters had gone (did they say what it was)? Don't worry about the baby being like his father, you are going to be the one to raise him so he will be more like your own father because he raised you.

I carry my notes with me all the time, just stick them in my bag, have done since 20 weeks. But i'm deffo going to start the hospital bag.

Talking of which, i've attached the hospital bag spread sheet to FB. I'll upload it to here later on, I can't access google docs on my work pc but will do it at home :)

TMI Alert jelly! are you ready?!

So my kickers were getting increasingly wet all day, and it had no consistency (like discharge does) it was just watery and the smell was different, not a bad smell like urine or BV infection, more like a fresh/sour smell. I really didn't think much of it but every time I went for a wee, it had spread in my knickers, and by 2pm it had soaked right through to my trousers (as in, I grabbed the crotch of my trousers from the outside and it felt wet).

calypso glad everything is ok!! Must have been a worry for you, think it's a good idea to take notes with you. I work an hours train ride from home/hospital so would be a nightmare to go home first and get them!

Also can I join the FB group?

calypso so glad you're ok, that's scary! And great that you had your friend to help. That sounds like a huge amount of discharge, it's pretty unnerving! I've started wearing panty liners to protect my trousers (I kept having to wash then after one wear) and also means I can keep a clear eye on the colour, etc. Also re notes, I got told off massively in my first pregnancy for not carrying them everywhere with me, so I've got a pocket in my bag that they stay in. They're fairly roughed up and well used!

And thanks calypso, ratty and jelly for the support. I'm feeling a bit better now and doing some music which is helping. We've planned to make a little hospital bag up which also has something comforting in it, and I've done a bit of research on which hospital we'd end up in at various gestations, as well as kangaroo care and breastfeeding premies. And once the bag is packed then I can leave it all behind me and concentrate on having my healthy full term baby :)

Calypso Doctors always refer to baby as "he". Did it even when they and we knew DD was a girl! Did it with DC1 & DC3 too. One was a boy, one was a girl.

ahhh right, yeah the discharge is terrifying sometimes.

I call it swamp foof. I keep forgetting to put panty liners on, must do it because i have similar days (not that extreme) where the moisture is ridiculous down below!

I would have been worried about that too calypso

Glad to hear all is well.