February 2016 - Boobs are growing, sickness is going, and some of us are finally showing!!

[jellypi3]

Stats are HERE

same haqoi i'd have thought they would have loads of space to move around at this stage

Thanks guys!

Yes I think they have plenty of room for manoeuvre at the moment. When I had my midwife appt on the 15th she said baby was head down and then the scan today showed breech. I have been feeling the low-down kicks all through the weekend too.

I'm probably over-invested in the baby's position as DS was breech for ages then he turned but was back to back (hence my lady parts issues that I mentioned up thread!) Apparently, while a breech baby will generally turn before labour, if it's after a certain time, say week 30something (need to look this up again) then usually when the baby turns they go head down and back to back. HOWEVER a back to back baby will still usually turn before birth. DS just didn't.

If I have another back to back labour then so be it, as issues go it is a minor one. But if I could choose then I'd choose not!

Hello!

Please could I join you all? I'm expecting my twins on 26th February (38 weeks) and am currently 15+3. They'll be my 2nd and 3rd babies and it's all very exciting but I'm already finding this pregnancy very different to my first.

It'd be lovely to share the journey with others anyway and pep eachother up along the way.

J xx

Congrats jessie and I think you're our group's first mum of twins!

congrats jesse :) you are indeed our first twinnies!

Congrats maisie and welcome jessie. My DH's cousin has just had twin girls - so adorable!

It's grim & rainy in London today, lovely! Two more sleeps till scan...

Morning all! Ended up in hospital again with cramps yesterday but everything was fine, thankfully. They kept asking when my scan was and I was like, it's tomorrow, I'd been hoping to hold out until then! They were so lovely and supportive. So, scan this evening! Anyone else today?

Jessie: welcome. .. you share my due date (although with yours booked it's a little more certain than mine). Just a singleton for me, will be my 3rd though .

Morning all. Welcome Jessie, twins is exciting!
Haquoi glad everything's ok.
My scan is today at 3pm. I'm nervous/excited.
My 12 week scan didn't go to plan as the baby was moving around too much for the sonographer to do the nuchal fold check so I had the quad test instead (which was fine, low risk). I'd love to find out the gender today if possible but have a feeling this baby is a naughty one & won't co-operate again! As long as it's all healthy that's all I care about really (but would also really like to find out what flavour! )

My partner and I are in crisis and I'm at a complete loss as to what to do. We only moved in together on 1st August and things already have gone down the pan. We're stuck in a cycle of weekly arguments where he ignores me for 3 days, I play peace maker then we are happy for 4 days. Cracks were showing before we moved in together but I stupidly thought moving in together would help somehow?

We've had 1 successful (?) couples counselling session which we both thought went really well but since then he has used the topics we discussed during the session against me. We had a massive row on Saturday night where I tried to push him out of the kitchen and he's confined himself to the spare room since then. The rows we have are over very small things like whether or not to have a bathroom cabinet (!?) or when to assemble the wardrobes. This makes me think that there's underlying issues. We agreed after session 1 to have more therapy, so I emailed the lady to see her availability for Friday. My OH sent me a vile email about how I have to stop making arrangements without his consent and reiterated his Saturday night threat of leaving the country (he's Italian).

I'm completely stumped as to what to do. I want to do the best for the baby, but I don't know what that is. I don't have parents to advise me. I have made the Friday night therapy session and I plan to go, even if it is alone. I think the relationship is over but I could convince myself to try again for the sake of the baby. Please help.

Oh calypso that sounds awful! It sounds like you're doing what needs to be done, in trying to talk things through and the counselling. You've got to do what's right for you, make sure you're safe and secure, whether that's with or without your partner. I'm not advocating that you don't try to work things out, but don't stay together for the sake of the baby, try because 'you' want to. That in itself with be the best thing for the baby. I'm sorry I can't be more help, I'm sure other mners will have some v good advice. Thinking of you though xxxx

calypsothat sounds an awful situation yo be in (at any time) his drastic threats speak volumes: he wants it his way, or he wont be around. I realise facing parenthood alone is daunting, but think not do much about the support and responsibility. Focus on the longer term life / atmosphere you want for your child. If you can achieve that with your partner, great. If not prepare your scenario to put to your partner. If he isn't going to be supportive, you need to know asap.
I've been a single parent (from dd2's birth). It is scary, but not the end of the world.
As for the problems, you're both presumably anxious to make it work. What are the positive aspects of your relationship? Can you both build on those?

Haquoi, good luck! Will DEF be time for celebratory cake this evening

Welcome Jessie!

Calypso, so sorry to hear that. If you want to talk in messages or IRL I'm v happy to listen- am rubbish at advice, but have absorbent shoulders and can provide beverages, cake and sympathy! Could it be temporary baby stress (has the situation finally come real to him now you're starting to show etc?) which he's being a dick about, and will turn back into a normal human at some point soon? Agree with Haquoi though, you need to do what's best for you. Hugs xxx

(To clarify): I was a single parent for 4/5 years. I am now remarried, expecting DC3 (for me).
It definitely sounds as though your trying what you can. Thinking of you

calypso that sounds really tough. The relationship sounds like it's been under a lot of stress with the baby and move all at once. I firmly believe that a child is better off in a happy single parent family than a miserable 2 parent family though, so if the only single reason you are staying with him is the baby, I would start a new life for yourself away from him and see how things pan out.
On the other hand, he could just be struggling with the prospect of becoming a dad and when he feels those kicks and you start to buy things together it may feel more real to him. If I were you I think I would try to decide if he is someone you want to share your life with, taking baby out of the equation, and move forward with that answer. Hope things improve for you soon

Welcome jessie! And good luck for today haquoi and curly, look forward to hearing your news

good luck for scans today :)

calypso no advice but for you, sounds like a horrible situation to be in

Hi everyone,

I've been on holiday for the past couple of weeks, just reading back through the thread and happy to read all the positive scan news, particularly for banana

My scan is coming up on Thursday afternoon. I'm interested to see how much the fetus is moving around as for the past week or so I've been feeling a lot of pulses and popping on both left & right sides about 2 inches below my belly button. Its quite distracting!

to rufus I hope your skin clears up soon. My DH gets bouts of eczema and it does not look fun.

Excited about the knitting chat! Anyone interested in swapping good patterns? I think you can exchange files via facebook (which I'll need to join). I've been trying to widen my repertoire (I have a couple of 'go to' designs that I use but its boring doing the same old thing). I'm working on a new one at the moment which is supposed to be for a 3 month old but looks like it would fit a toddler!!

Good morning! Thanks all, it’s lovely to join you! :)

Hehe, 26th February is my drop-dead date Sighing, they’ll induce me then if they haven’t already arrived but everyone keeps warning me that they’re likely to be earlier than that… It’ll make a change after my first finally decided to emerge 13 days late! Congratulations on your third; you’ll be a dab hand! :)

Hope today’s scans go well CurlyA and Haquoi, looking forward to hearing your news later! :)

So sorry to hear you’re having such a rough time Calypso; I think everyone else has said it already, but my personal view is that although you make a commitment to work at a relationship, your first commitment to your child is to give them as happy and secure a home as possible and its really up to you as to whether that can be done with your partner or if it would be more likely on your own. Do you have any idea how involved he’d be with the child if you were to split? Thinking of you anyway, it’s always difficult, let alone when you’re expecting, but it sounds like you’re doing all the right things.

Oh Calypso that sounds really hard. Here's what I think (for what it's worth):

You are both under a huge amount of stress at the moment (moving in together and baby on the way) so it's understandable that you might be having disagreements over small things as a result, that's pretty normal.

However, these disagreements have been developing into massive heated rows, followed by periods of him ignoring you... that's much less good, and would get very exhausting very quickly. I certainly couldn't continue in a relationship where that happened with any kind of regularity. I have to say I also think it's a bad sign that he has been using what was discussed in the therapy session against you (You might feel you can't be honest in therapy now because you'd only give him more ammunition at home)... And it does sound as though he wants the relationship all on his terms...

If you think this pattern is just going to continue and you can't see any way to get him to snap out of it permanently I think I would leave to be honest... Sending un-mumsnetty hugs your way. xx

Thanks Clara . I've got my 20 week scan on Monday, so nervous/excited!! Good luck for yours on Thursday.

Welcome jessie so exciting that you're having twins, I'm a twin and it's ace

calypso I don't have any wise words bur hugs. It sounds like a really difficult thing to have to go through at the moment. And without being a pessimist, I'm not sure it'll get easier when little one arrives, that seems to be when things get harder. My relationship experience is that you can't expect people to change for the better. Sometimes they do but usually not, you have to view how they behave now as how they're going to behaving in the future and base your decisions on that.

Afternoon all.
Congratulations on all of the happy scan news. I've got mine in an hour and a half. I'm feeling very nervous, so nervous that I feel sick and I don't quite know why. I hope that it's not some kind of intuition and rather that my lunch isn't agreeing with me.

I'm sorry for those of you with relationship issues at the moment. They seem to rear their heads during pregnancy. I'm certainly suffering from some issues from the past at the moment.
Having been married to a liar, I've found that it's left some lasting affects. I seem to be unable to trust anyone, especially now that I'm pregnant and I'm taking it out on my partner. He's done nothing to make me think that he can't be trusted but jealousy/angst/fear has raised it's ugly head and it's quite horrible.
My ex has a bloody lot to answer for!

I wish all of you the best in overcoming these problems. Such a time of change is bound to come with complications, we just have to ride them out.

Anyways, on a lighter note, I shall report back with news of my scan later today.

good luck jellybelly :)

For what it's worth, calypso, I grew up in a single parent family where my dad was fairly non-existent. I know that my mum found it very difficult, but my memories are of a happy, loving childhood where my mum was my entire world and she was absolute safety. I'm so so pleased they weren't together and that has enabled me to have a good relationship with him now. Again I'm not advocating one over the other, but if this decision is made as the best thing for you, the baby will be ok

X post with jellybelly, sorry. Best of luck!! I've got my fingers crossed for you xxx