February 2016 - Boobs are growing, sickness is going, and some of us are finally showing!!

[jellypi3]

Stats are HERE

Where is everybody today?

madsaz good exercises I was taught for lower back pain is lie on your back with knees bent and feet flat on floor. Push your pelvis up into a bridge keeping feet on floor, then very slowly drop your back down veterbrae by veterbrae, to begin with if it is bad there will be no flexibility and your spine won't curve down but after a few goes it should start to relax. Other exercise is same start position, take your left foot and place on right knee with left leg at 90 degree. Then bring right knee towards tummy, you should feel a gluteal stretch in your left rump. A lot of back pain is caused by gluteal and other deeper muscles being too tight. Will also help sciatic pain. I try and do these every day but at some point bump is going to stop me being able to.

I am having terrible intestinal pain today, started in the night. Been to the toilet twice but I think it is trapped gas, think my intestines have moved to make room for uterus and they are objecting majorly.

thanks Rufus - will try them. A lot of the pain is definitely gluteal - I'll be minding my own business when an arse cheek goes into spasm and I let out an involuntary squeal. I have set myself unrealistic expectations and assumed for some reason I would breeze through based on my mate - who realistically is much skinnier and much fitter than me, so why I thought we were comparable I have no idea!

Had a terrible day really. My much older sister has long been a bit of a loose cannon - she was widowed 20 years ago & since then life has been a rollercoaster of self neglect, alcohol and decent periods of her getting it together. Today she didn't turn up for our hairdresser who phoned me worried. I couldn't get her on the phone so went round to her house - she was clearly in (bag and phone on sofa, car etc) but we just couldn't rouse her. I was kicking the door and everything.

So had to phone the police to break in (over recent years she has had new locks and not provided spare keys to anyone) -just as we are about to break door down she appears - clearly still hammered. At 3.30pm.

Aside from the embarrassment of wasting police time I had worked out all the possible ways I was going in to find her dead or seriously ill. She was too drunk to understand why I was upset. Going to be keeping a low profile till I am calm enough to be civil I think - really don't want the stress right now

Oh no that must have been so scary mad! A alcohol can make people really selfish! Has she ever got any professional help or support?

I'm on a night shift with tooth ache and nausea

mad you sound like an amazing sister. But you are right that you don't need that kind of stress at the moment. Addiction and addiction behaviour just sucks the life blood out of the people around it. I hope your sister is able to get the help she needs. Take care of yourself

I am currently having to hold family dramas at arms length a bit. My mum is getting divorced from my step-dad and has a new partner that she is now with 24/7. Anyway, she seems happy so hopefully there won't be too much fighting in the divorce

Also my sister's partner of 15 years, with whom she has a 4 yo and a 6m old, has announced that he is moving halfway across the planet in the new year. Just him. My sister is due back to her high-pressure job right about then and will have school and nursery to juggle. I will be able to help at some point but not right away. Even when I settle into a routine with the new baby I don't know how much I'm going to be able to do with an 18mo and a newborn of my own (and a 14yo!) As much as possible I guess. I could cheerfully strangle my BIL right now and I make no apologies for that

The worst thing is that the 4yo adores him and this is going to absolutely devastate her. Selfish article.

wow that's scary mad, some people have no thoughts or feelings do they :(

Hello. Can I join in this thread I'm 15+ weeks, EDD 26 Feb.

Hi everyone, finally saying hello! I am due #1 on 21 Feb, so will be 16w tomorrow. So far, so good (fingers crossed) Am an expat in Dubai, so just hoping I'm still up to flying home to the UK for Christmas!

Hi sighing and primers. Lovely to have some more people due towards the end of the month, I'm due 25th Feb.

Hi everyone

Sorry I haven't posted for a while, just laying low really! Finally told my new headteacher about the pregnancy, which went much better than expected.

I'm back to work tomorrow after a lovely summer holiday and, with that in mind, I've been shopping for maternity clothes. Was thrilled to find plain black, under bump trousers from mamas and papas reduced from £36 to £5. Picked them up yesterday and they're great so I ordered another pair! They've got a couple of bits reduced to a fiver, limited sizes available, but worth a look!

Yep. Families make life bearable but at times add a whole new dimension. On balance I'm glad I have mine but today we will be gently finding out what state she is in.

Welcome new people I'm not always miserable.

nectarines thanks for the mamas and papa's trousers heads up- I'll be checking them out online today!

Anyone who needs to hit up the maternity tights, they're on buy one get one half price in boots atm. Still expensive but it's something hey!

Sorry to the ladies having tough family times. Sounds like you're coping amazingly well and being able to offer so much support to your nearest and dearest during pregnancy is some effort (I can barely remember to feed the cat I'm so distracted by it all).

I had a small and indulgent meltdown this morning when DH replied to my sadness about missing my old boozy, fun social life with the classic "you can't have it all, you're pregnant". Bit rich after he spent the day boozing with friends watching the rugby at twickenham yesterday!

Is anyone else feeling they have a little less in common with some of their friends and the dynamic has changed a bit? I guess on the flip side I have friends with kids that I feel a bit closer to these days and I'm hoping to meet new mummy friends at nct etc. Just feels a bit like social life limbo at the moment.

Apologies for the moan! And welcome new folk

Definitely. Apparently it's selfish of me to suggest going out for a meal rather that a pub crawl as I would feel more equal.

I expect to get selfishly wrapped up in my baby world anyway so they are probably whinging about me too

I have totally shunned all boozy get togethers- can just about cope with dinner out if I can get back home and be in bed by 10.30pm. Stick to your guns mad, you sound perfectly reasonable to me and totally entitled to get wrapped up in baby world (I certainly am- about to drag DH out to Jojo to choose a nice new born sleep suit to cheer myself up).

Sorry to those having hard family times at the moment

Happy end of weekend, back to school for me tomorrow! Countdown to scan is on!

Families can be a pain im the backside! I have a very difficult relationship with my ( won't go into details ) but I'm trying to avoid contact with her at the moment as I don't want to waste emotional energy on her at the moment. Hugs to those who need it!!
Got my scan on Thursday can't wait! Who else is soon?

Well, I'd love to say I spent Saturday having high tea at Claridge's rufus, but it was in fact spending 7+ hours helping to train volunteers, locked in a class room . Really hope your Saturday was a better one! The one bonus was I wrote out the baby plan book.

That sounds grim mad, and it must be such a horrible set of feelings for you too- anger, upset, grief, understanding at her loss, frustration... The police won't have minded, doing a welfare check and finding the person alive on the other side of the door is a win, trust me.

Hello to Sighing and Primera, and welcome to the end-of-the-month-EDD group too, with me and swimming!

How on earth does your sister feel about the job Montagues? Has she agreed and is happy or has it been foisted upon her? My DStepM worked in Paris for 6 months when my little sister was about 18 months, but that was a) a short time relatively close, as we're in the SE b) little sis went over to visit and to live for chunks of it and c) there was only her and my Dad was quite happy with it. Do you think their relationship will survive as I'd've strangled him and put him under the patio if it were my DH ?

I'm OK on the friends front; we tend to do meals anyway, and I'm happy in the pub with soft drinks. They are all either a bit older like me, 35-40 or more, or a couple are mothers themselves so know the score. I think if I were 25 and had still been caning it, it would be slightly different though.

Jealous of those with scans, I've still got a month to go!

madsaz that sounds just awful! You seem to be dealing with it all very well. Sorry to those having family issues. I found a lot of underlying family issues came to the fore with DD1 and I rarely see mine now, though see ILs every week. just have bigger things to concentrate on. It's not a bad thing. Like carshare says some people you move away from when a big event like this happens, I found that to be true of some friends and also family (mine never expected me to have children and don't do children) but I've also found a wealth of new friends, as well as a gorgeous daughter, that more than make up for it.

primeravez welcome! There's someone else from Dubai too. DH and I are considering a move there next Easter after the baby is born (we've just returned from two years in Hong Kong).

nomontagues I can't believe your BIL. Are they splitting up? My DH stayed in HK for four months (it wasn't planned, his work forced him at last minute, flights already booked) alone and it was the hardest thing ever working almost full time, doing nursery, without anyone at the end of the day to drink wine with. I would never ever do it again. A friends DH's is going out to the U.S. for 9 months, I just can't believe it. I hope she's okay!

chinchilla and northern (I've name changed but you'll know who I was!)

• no! My sister has been totally blindsided by this. She knew he had put in for a transfer to HK a couple of years ago but thought the whole thing was shelved due to the new baby. He has had his existing role transferred over there so there's no time limit or contract period.

I don't think the relationship will survive, no. I don't think he wants it to. I'm gutted for my sister but I feel unbearably sad for the two DCs. The baby is only 6mo

I mean chinchilla and Xing ! I am not the sharpest today. Smothered with a cold and my head is so wooly

Sympathy to those with family 'stuff'. Fwiw I haven't told my family as yet. Too much drama from them re my previous m/c and that I took a break etc.
I'm waiting until after 20 weeks.

Ooooh, I've had a just-under-the-radar cold all last week Maisie, was bloody grim, my sympathies. How dreadful for your sister though... I had a minor league version of this when my bf of three years announced he was moving back to his home country. He was obsessed with the place, but it was all a bit of a shock and he knew I'd never come with him. However, we were young and had no kids, so I can't imagine how your poor sister is feeling.

And it's not like he'll be having the kids every other weekend either, is it. Jeez, what a shit (pardon me for saying!).

Been getting a few more tickles from LO this evening, been lovely . And we've run DS into the ground at the local farm/adventure place, five hours we were there, and in the SUN

Welcome newbies

Seems like lots of people are going through tough times! It is the autumn equinox coming up soon with a lunar eclipse. Autumn equinox is all about change and letting go, eclipses magnify things, in 2008 the collapse of Lehman brothers that started the world recession happened 2 days after the autumn equinox, if you believe in that sort of thing. Was also exactly when I found out DH was having an affair, so I do believe. Also 7 year cycle so we are due for a big change this September in general in the world and I think everyone can definitely say that is happening at the moment with the refugee crisis.

Mads I have a drug addict sister, I had no choice but to cut her out of my life in the end as she wouldn't accept help and was damaging everyone around her. People really struggle with how I don't have her in my life but the person I grew up with and loved hasn't existed in over 10 years. There is a shadow with her name and face but it isn't her.

Realised today that DH and I are going to
have no choice but to paint the whole house ourselves. Really didn't want to expose baby to paint fumes, painting a nursery is one thing but a whole house is a lot of fumes!

I have the worst indigestion ever, only got halfway through my dinner before I had to give up the pain got so bad. Seems there isn't enough room for baby, me and food in there. I seem to also have constant intestinal pain with trapped wind. Just how bad is this going to get??? It is only through going through pregnancy myself that I can be so thankful to my own mother for having me and now knowing how much she suffered to have me.

Don't apologise chinchilla - you've pretty much summed it up. We're all in shock tbh. I'm hoping against hope that he sees sense and doesn't go. If he and Dsis split, ok fine, if he was staying local its workable. But HK?

That's interesting rufus , about the exquinox and everything. I'm actually welcoming the onset of Autumn this year. I'm 20 weeks on Wednesday- halfway there! Can't believe it really.

Hi all I haven't been on in a while but I've been keeping up to date with all the news. Sorry to hear all of those who are having family-related stress at the moment - hopefully things settle down. We're having a stressful time too with house buying/selling not going to plan and to be honest I'm exhausted by the whole bloody thing! DS has been sick and then I was sick and ended up on antibiotics so it's been a tiring few weeks.

Pregnancy-wise all is well with me - 20 weeks today! I have my anatomy scan next Monday and I am starting to get nervous already. I've been feeling lots of movements some days and very little others so I'm looking forward to getting a peek at the baby and seeing if everything is going okay.