Due March 2007 - Heading for the third trimester

[Booboobedoo]

Thought I'd start a new thread as the other one's about to run out.

Calli I am hoping to have another home birth

If I can recommend ANYTHING after all these years of having babies and using equipment it would be one of these
I got mine on ebay. Absolutely wonderful invention

I'd like to try to do the first part in a birthing pool if one at the hospital is available. I think for my first baby I'd like to be at the hospital.. but would like a home birth in the future if we're to have more children.

elective c-section for me.

Hi - DH woke me early his morning

Kitty - I'm sorry things at home aren't great at the moment. If you fancy a chat text me on 07779-289-041 and I'll give you a call back. Having just dragged myself out of a depressive state which lasted weeks I don't want you feeling miserable. Its usually you that cheers me up on here.

Anyway, I won't have anyone to join me when I get into fights LOL...

Diva I totally agree with you about Mum's not being able to win. Working Mum's feel guilty for having to leave their children and sahm's feel guilty when people say things like "er, wot do you do all day???"(eh?) or expect them to be a domestic goddess LOL. If men had babies then staying at home would be valued much higher. If only we could be paid to stay at home and look after our chidren that would be great wouldn't it - wages for housework etc.

We always use a moses basket at first but they seem to grow out of it at 3 months , so go into bigger bedside cot thing. I think DS2 may stay with us in our room for the first year, after that, not sure - maybe with DD and DS for second year, then a big reshuffle as DS would be 8 then so he may have earned the right to his own room

Eids - its really interesting what you said about English nurseries. I was at a childcare conference once for work and it became apparent that the reason why childcare is so expensive in the UK is becaue its of a much higher standard then most countries, with much higher staff/children ratios and qualified staff etc. I think Sweden was the only country where they had high quality nurseries which are free for all children from the age of one , oh and parents get a year off work on full pay

I haven't made my mind up about the birth yet, apart from to say that Queen Charlottes will not be inducing my baby at 38 weeks I'd like a home birth maybe? Or I would be in the brithing pool at QC in their birthing centre for hours, then not sure after that - whip me upstairs for an epidural then pop the baby out effortlessly I had two vag births though so will avoid a ceasar at all costs.

I'll do that foxy, thanks

Just dropping in quickly to say hello! All doing well here, I just haven't managed to find time to catch up properly! I'm sleeping a lot (while I can ), which is seriously cutting into my mn time!

Hope everyone is well, will try to catch up properly soon!

.... are we really heading for the third trimester already?????

Lunar - will try and get your cheque in the post today for the Cybermask

Many thanks again for buying it. DS will be so happy at Christmas when he opens that one!!!

Hi y'all.

I understood that being a mother made you feel guilty enough without listening to other people! Actually, I don't think I'm good enough at listening to other people. I hear what I want to hear and ignore the rest. Not good really, but at least it may stand in my favour when I'm a Mum.

We're turning the study/junk-room into a nursery. We're about halfway through clearing it, and will try and get it done for Christmas, as our building work is starting in January. I'm thinking baby-blue carpet I(with lots of washable rugs), white walls and blue gingham curtains.

Got a rotten, stinking cold today. It's made my MS come back with a vengeance .

How's everyone else?

EDD 3/3
24+2
Boy.

Hi all and welcome to the new people !

Kitty - do share your woes on here... it's what we are here for. I cried yesterday as loads of my DS1's baby photos have been ruined by mildew. I hate this country sometimes I am so looking forward to coming back to the UK for this baby...thinking of settling in cornwall.... scones and pasties ...

Piffle - glad you are on the mend. Hope your pain eases up.Morocco, get well soon.

I think nurserys can be good for some children for some of the time, particularly when they are 2 ish, it really does help them learn to share and to be more independant. I am sure my DS1 is a lazy tyke because he didn't go... my DS2 is a very generous creature and he goes a few hours each morning.That said everyone has to make their own judgments based on their child AND necessity.

I hope to have another home birth - although have a horrid feeling this DS is going to be a giant... actually 'Gulliver' has a certain ring to it

I never bother buying much as have the baby in my bed ... lazy and tight .

Good luck with your move diva and everyone elses cleaning/tidying/nesting. Looks like I will be moving at 7.5 months preggers. GULP.

Anyone seen Jay or Rainbow ?

11/3 Boy

Nursery sounds lovely booboobedooo. And good idea to only hear what you want to hear, think I'll try that

Kitty I love the look of the baby hammock! I am very tempted. Hope you are feeling perkier again soon

We have an ancient cot, which will do the job, though I fancy a baby hammock....

I've always wanted an adult hammock! Our neighbours got one in his garden and am a bit >

Boo - your nursery sounds lovely. Gingham is very fresh looking

Laidback LOL a your lazy tyke I'm lazy and tight too, plus I love having newborns in the bed. I sleep curled around them all proective.

We're not buying anothing new and will force the children to share although there's room for them to spread out. Am determined to keep the "study" for as long as possible. We have an attic room , bit it seems too far away to put small chidren in. Plus its full of junk

Has anyone heard the news. How do you kidnap 100 people???? Am working from home today so have lugholes stuck to Radio 4

Laidback - did you decide about the mask? It might be easier/cheaper to post it to your parents if you're going to be back here in time for Christmas anyway?

Hi all, thanks for the feedback on Biddulph and his theories on childcare - (yes indeed, Morocco - "slammers and sliders" - kind of made me wince a bit.)
As usual though, got another good balanced view from you guys and that helps alot.

Boo - your nursery sounds lovely, sorry to hear you have MS again AND a cold - I have never been so "ill" since being preggers - I lurch from one bug to another... have aches and pains that I never would have guessed. No wonder this is a womans job! Men would be running for the hills!

Yes, our "nesting" to make way for nursery has including relocating DH's study, and a huge chuck out of clothes and general crap. Feels quite good actually - but am woefully aware am just making way for a different type of crap! I am being mercilessly teased by friends that my minimilist look will end shortly to make way for kiddo stuff. Oh well.

Kitty - I have spotted that hammock in another MN discussion and bookmarked it - I think we will deffo get one - it looks comfy. I hope you feel better soon? You are also such a cheery and supportful soul, I miss you on-line.

Foxy - whats going on ? I'll switch my radio on.

Had HUGE hunk of carrot cake with lunch today. Yum yum, pigs bum! Listen, carrots are good for you....

Hello ladies,
Can I join your club?
I am 21 weeks pregnant today with our first, who we're going to call Bertie. EDD 27th March (just a few days more and I could get nine months with Bertie )
What does the plus number after how many weeks pg you are mean? Is it days?

{Callieco to answer your question I'm going to have him in hospital with DH & MIL. I'm actually going to Liverpool Women's which isn't my nearest but I know two people who went there & said it was brill. (Plus I want Liverpool as place of birth on Bertie's birth cert. Yes I do know that's a bit sad ) I'll probably have an epidural as I'm a proper wimp!}

The bare bones of my situ are Dp and I are at rock bottom.
Had a VERY nasty 'disagreement' on saturday which has changed pretty much everything, so I'm working that through at the mo.
I'm not in a position to leave him at the moment so I have to work out how I can make the situation tolerable until that time comes.
DD3 has the most vile runny poos and consequent burnt and bleeding bottom which means I have to change her every half an hour day and night. This has been going on for three nights now and I am so so tired. Her screams wake up the other children. W are all tired.
Anyway, that's whereIi am, sorry

21+6 boy ( I keep forgetting to do that) !!
Welcome msrlmoss, yes the + means no of days

Kitty - I bet you your DP is also feeling crap though men won't show it. Is there any way you can get some time alone with him to talk for a couple of hours? Preferably out of the house so you don't get inerrupted.

Sorry to be so personal, but do you still love each other?

I've had some really rough times with DH (including getting as far as Decree Nisi), but we kind of dragged ourselves back from the brink as we knew that there was still some love left, beneath all the day to day crap and differences of views.

Only you and he know whether its worth saving it or not. From his posts on MN he seems to have a lot of respect and love for you..what happened?

Why don't you take DD to the GP and see if you can get something to heal her poor bum quickly, or at least stop the burning pain?

Oh Kitty

I deffo support Foxy's views. Talking it through honestly and trying to understand other person's view (asking them to explain it to me) has usually worked for me. That normally gives me a "aha" moment, and, "oh thats why they think / did / said that"... etc and so on - and if anything helps rationalise their behaviour.
Mind you a good screaming match has its place too!

I agree with Fox - do you love him? If so its worth working hard for?

Kitty - you poor thing. Have you got anyone impartial you can talk to either separately or together ? Everyone suggests 'relate' at this point, but sometimes you just know its over . When I broke up with my partner of 10 years I had therapy at the same time and it really helped me work out why I had chosen eX DP as a partner in the first placed an how to end the relationship in a way that didn't screw up either of us or the kids...it was very powerful.

Lunar - the mask is for my sons birthday next week. If you could post it to SL it would be fab - but could be expensive ?? Don't mind paying postage of 10-15 quid ... is there any way of finding out costs without you trekking to the post office looking like dr who's answer to the headless horseman ? Don't worry if it's too much hassle xx

Laidback - it looks more like it would be £15-£20 to send it airmail to Sri Lanka - and that's if they class it as a "small packet" which they might not as it's actually going to be a fairly sizeable parcel relative to it's weight.

Thanks all, I don't know what I feel anymore. There is a side to us that gets on and works well as friends, but there is also another side that is dreadful. We have talked and talked over time and i'm done with it now. There's not much to say that we haven't already discussed a million times already. I don't want to say exactly waht happenede at the weekend but it changed things and only time will tell how that will turn out. At the mo my judgment is clouded by lack of sleep and sheer exhaustion.
Thanks for all the kind words though

Hi msrlmoss, some folks have managed to get their edd changed, perhaps you could too, you are so close....

Kittywits, with your current stress levels, you must be in fight or flight survival mode at the moment. And have possibly been like that for a while.
My mad mother has moments of wisdom and when she sees me in that kind of state tells me not to throw the baby out with the bath water! Breath, eat, sleep. And don't make any decisions at the moment if possible.Thinking about you.

Rosybumpily who would I need to speak to about getting my EDD changed? Would I just ask them outright do you think?

God my boss would go ballistic if that happened. I can just imagine his little bald head going red with fury! Maybe it might explode (wishful thinking)!

Kittywits I know I am new but I am sorry to hear things aren't so great. It is bad enough as it is with the emotional turmoil of pgcy anyway and all the hormones, without something actually being wrong as well. Hope you get some sleep at the very least xx

Kitty, I dunno what to say really except that DH and I did some truly terrible things in the year running up to our Decree Nisi, things which were so treacherous I can't even say on here in case someone I know spots it.

His friends couldn't believe he forgave me for what I did to him and mine couldn't believe I forgave him for what he did to me. We also lived in the same house for a year not speaking to each other while we lived our own lives and did our best to hurt each other. It was true hell at the time and I remember I had to get anti-depressants just to sleep.

You need to take some time to think about how you feel and whether you could bear life without him or not. I thought I could live without DH but it turns out I couldn't, and can't, and we gave it another try and it actually worked out much better. We got a friend to mediate (one of his women friends) as we couldn't even have a civilised conversation at the time.

Once we decided to try again, we just had to put all the disgusting behaviour behind us and we agreed we'd never bring it up again. That was about 8 years ago and we've never discussed those things since (even in anger).

That's probably no help at all but I thought I tell you. I really feel for you

msrlmoss - sorry I forgot to day hello to you earlier Ask your midwife to change your dates, then you can just tell small and baldyman that the hospital have changed them