The nice weather is making us crave burning meat on an outdoor fire, maternity leave is causing headache, and we are all soldiering on as the heat is getting to us - here is JS 26!

[Fattycow]

Welcome, welcome, welcome to the 26th grads thread... celebrating the success of Just Shagging in getting us viroids upduffed!

For those that don't know, a 'viroid' is from the original JSing thread 1, where someone was trying to type ladies (in reference to all the JSing ladies), but their phone decided to call us all viroids instead!

The name stuck and we've been the JSing viroids ever since.

The thread we have graduated from is here in its 42nd outing. WARNING: they're all a bit kerazy not to mention randy!

There is also a Just Mumming thread in postnatal clubs here for once your babies come along, or to keep up with the graduated graduates!

There is also a private facebook group (so it doesn't give the game away in your news feed!)... if you want to join to see photos of new babies etc, just ask in-thread!

Here is the stats list, please update your own spot with any updates: docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1oLJqpadAb2givKYq8OJfGCti3s6xzsTGlI-GoaBfM_M/edit?pli=1#gid=0

Ah that makes me feel a bit better, thought I was the only one.

Erm I don't think I count on the job front :/ cut a long story short I went on may leave early with DD as I was diagnosed with Generalised Anxiety Disorder. Mostly to do with the fact that I was being yelled at day in day out by unhappy customers who we owed thousands to and the manager would pretend she wasn't in and get me to take messages (and the abuse) and never ring them back. She was absolutely fucking dog shit at her job and I can't physically stand her the amount of stress I was under was making me ill.. Yes ive always been a worrier but not the the extent that I'm verging on a mental breakdown and shaking everyday before work. Anyway needless to say I never went back to that job, fast forward to October last year (still had 2 months left of maternity allowance) and I got caught pregnant again. Nobody wanted to employ me by the time my mat leave ran out (early January) because I was already 3-4 months pregnant and nobody wanted the hassle of a) hiring a pregnant woman and b) having to replace me within 6 months. I then had to go on decades JSA for the first time in my whole life. To say I was fucking devastated was an understatement my OH threatened to leave because I was so adamant I didn't want to accept any form of benefit. Due to having a family to look after and DP being self employed I had to. I had to go in the job centre every Tuesday and sign on. I was looking for work but everytime I was pushed back once they got wind that I was pregnant. Come April I was making the system look bad as they couldn't find me a job so I'm now on ESA until I can apply for income support. It's absolutely shit, I hate it and I cannot wait for this time next year when I can go back to work. I'll scrub fucking toilets just so I don't have to claim benefits anymore. It's the most degrading thing I've ever had to do and the only people that know I'm on it is my family, DP and his mum/dad and that's it. How people enjoy sponging off the system I'll never know.

I'm going back but was surprised to read that if I don't then I don't have to pay anything back. Nice!

We still need to top up our deposit for house to be able to go home to Scotland. If I come back for a year that will be enough to do that. Then we are going to go home and run a business.

Because my dh works flexible shifts we will only need to put baby into nursery one day a week as we can work it out between us. I'll wfh one day a week and dh will work nights 3 days.

I don't think I'd want to be sahm but part time would be lovely.

I don't think I could go back FT and I probably would have stayed at home for longer if my job wasn't so convenient. Will have to start looking into childcare soon, scary!

What kind of business would you run la?

We would love to work for ourselves but have no idea what!

Just crashing in on most recent discussion as haven't had a chance to read back, but I'm not going back as it turns out. I am taking voluntary redundancy, which is scary as all get out but a good outcome really. Just had my discussion with HR today, am really emotional about it as I love my job and have the best colleagues in the world. ??

I am hoping to find a job!

I'm currently doing a load of holistic therapy courses and going to go into massage and aromatherapy and work for myself. Just think it'll be easier with 2 young children as I can pick my own hours

Ok I'm catching up.

The MatB1 form is given to the mothers employer as proof of her pregnancy. They should keep it in your HR file. They are not allowed to pay SMP without it and may have to show it to HMRC in an inspection

To get paternity pay, the father/partner of mother in a same sex couple should complete form SC3 Declaration of Family Commitment. It doesn't have to be the biological father that claims it but should be someone with parental responsibility for the child

Dulcet, what they pay your replacement is nothing to do with what they pay you unfortunately, even though it's unfair. If they pay them a higher grade then you'd probably have cause to raise a grievance but the fact he's a couple of points higher is unlikely t make a difference

La so I'm glad I didn't upset you. I'm intrigued about what business you'd run though

I'm going back part time after 9 months off. I need to save more money for mat leave. I might do a few KIT days to top up my SMP. I'm trying not to stress about it.

Hopefully I'll go back 3.5 days a week but not sure how that will work yet. I want to do Tues/Wed/Thur, with 2 nursery days and a day with Mum. I might do alt Friday's or try to fit in hours at weekends. I need to chat with my boss.
It will mean that I'm probably away from home a couple of nights a week which will be tough but it means I will get some sleep! DH will cope and work at home if I'm away so he can do nursery drop off/pick ups.

I need to go back I think. I've worked for 25 years since I left school. I'd love to have longer off and maybe work less but I'm lucky I don't have to go back full time too

Fleur I've been told to get the childcare sorted soon or I might not get the days I want. Mid week days are in demand in a lot of nurseries as people want mon,tue, wed or tue,wed,thu, or wed, thu, fri

My mum is coming to live with us (separate house, same plot) and we are going to run a Cattery

That and our hospitality business that my dh will run.

I will also so p/t consultancy in my usual job

If I do find a job, my DH might go down to 4 days a week. He would want to take Wednesdays off. Thankfully we have no issues with childcare, as my mum would be more than happy to babysit her first grandchild.
To be honest, I would be happy with a 'simple' job for 2 or 3 days a week, but I'm way overqualified for those jobs.

Just checked back and it was Could! Could's CS was today!

Could - I hope it all went well and look forward to hearing from you with some news, hope you're resting :-)

Sorry all but I need to moan...

Am really suffering with nausea in the evenings and am gagging a lot. DH is having to do most of the cooking because I just can't deal with the smell, even though I'm mostly happy to eat. He's happy with this. He started cooking at 7.20, and was provided with marinated chicken wings, potatoes, white cabbage (for slaw) and sweetcorn. The man is still cooking an hour and ten minutes later, and I am feeling sicker and sicker and just can't cope.

Have gone into the kitchen just now to find out where we're at, to see that the thing he has cooked LAST is the fucking cunting chicken. In his own words, he made the slaw first, then did the potatoes, sweetcorn and then chicken. I pointed out that this was ridiculous as the chicken takes as long to cook as the potatoes, and this was met with 'well why didn't you come down and tell me?'. The man is perfectly capable of knocking up bread or cooking a Sunday roast, but appears to be completely fucking incapable of cooking wings in a timely fashion.

I have the same conversation with him every night; that I need to eat soon because I'm feeling sicker and sicker, and he just doesn't seem to take it on board. I'm afraid I tried to explain this again and then just burst into tears and ran away, and am now MNing in the bedroom and trying not to retch.

Someone cheer me up and tell me I am allowed to be a fat, unreasonable, blubbering gagging mess!

la that sounds amazing!

If I could work for myself I'd try the following (pipe dream alert)!

• cookery school for mums & kids (food education is something I've got a total chick boner about at the moment)
• if I could make a permanent living from my weather photography/Stormchasing by doing research then I absolutely would
• very small bespoke party/dinner party catering business.

I'm crap at crafting, and I'm a terrible salesperson, but I can cook and tell you when the next thunderstorm will be. Business would be called 'cooking up a storm'. Maybe when I win the lottery.....

Packed the hospital bag. Mr tee is briefed and has packed his overnight bag and them next to each other, with the contingency longer stay items. I cried. Now I'm having chips.

Thanks to everyone who has been so open and honest about the weight thing. I have to admit that it got to me more than i was expecting - less the weight, i think, as I'm scale-phobic, but more the fact that I've had to cut back and do less exercise than i was used to. Until March, i was playing league badminton most weeks and also running about 4 miles most weeks, and as a result of a combination of back problems, manic few weeks at work and a vomiting bug, I've done nothing apart from walks for nearly a month.
so feeling disappointed with myself but listening to what you are all saying and trying to cut myself some slack.
didn't help that i had virtually no bump at 19 weeks, and I've ballooned in the last 10 days, despite that charmingly sickness bug and eating very little for 2days.
so hooyah-ing myself and trying to woman up, but all ass-kicking gratefully received.

Hahaha. Oh lemon gag away! I still struggle eating proper dinners at proper times and Mr tee just doesn't get it at all! If it's any consolation I had really bad evening pukes too and ate lots of hula hoops which helped.. Xx

Oh, and lemon - i can sympathise on the feeling worse the longer you have to wait for food, so not unreasonable at all. "And why didn't you tell me," is a cop out. Presumably you don't tell him to put underwear on before trousers either, and he can sequence that! (Please tell me that he can sequence that!)
Hopefully, the sickness phase will pass soon and you'll feel much better.
in the meantime, is it worth nibbling something small whilst he's cooking to keep you going?

Oh lemon. That sounds pants. Hope you get some food soon. I have been nibbling on dry water biscuits as and when necessary, can you try that while you wait for the FC chicken? (Like KFC but with more swearwords).Nausea ramped up this morning but I reckon it is still only 3 on the chunder scale, expecting it to get worse though, and the next few weeks will be epic at work. Don't really fancy teaching while vomming in a bag....

Update:

When we sat down to eat, the chicken wasn't cooked.

Awwww lemon it sucks! This soon shall pass. Chips are a great healer I promise.

Sorry cross post. It wasn't fucking cooked! Now then lemon I would go fucking mental!!!!!!!!

lemon, that sucks! Is there anything else you can eat? Not just for now, but for other days as well. Even if it is just a sandwich or some crackers, just to settle your stomach a bit?