Calmly and regally gestating our beans in a land of obsessive ILs, placenta horticulture, sweary doctors and naked pancake cravings. It's the JS grads thread 23!

[LaLaLaaaa]

Welcome, welcome, welcome to the 23rd grads thread... celebrating the success of Just Shagging in getting us viroids upduffed!

For those that don't know, a 'viroid' is from the original JSing thread 1, where someone was trying to type ladies (in reference to all the JSing ladies), but their phone decided to call us all viroids instead!

The name stuck and we've been the JSing viroids ever since.

The thread we have graduated from is here in its 40th outing. WARNING: they're all a bit kerazy not to mention randy!

There is also a Just Mumming thread in postnatal clubs here for once your babies come along, or to keep up with the graduated graduates!

There is also a private facebook group (so it doesn't give the game away in your news feed!)... if you want to join to see photos of new babies etc, just ask in-thread!

The stats sheet is here

So, roll call below please, viroids!

La you could have a look at Penelope leach "your baby and child", it isn't a specific sleep/bf book but the advice in it is sensible! Lots of hints and tips about things you might like to try or "if this happens, then why not try X" ad not patronising. Also The NCT has some good stuff on their website about bfing.

With regards to sleep it is easiest and less stressful to go with the flow...whatever means you can rest too was always our method, baby never read the books. We just adapted as she got older.

You're right La. We have had a lovely time together. I was just a it bummed about not doing much but it doesn't matter.

In other news I've woken with a massive stye on my left eye. There's no head but it hurts like buggery!

Had a great night's sleep twingey cervix is still asleep. Accidentally broke my ball pump too while trying to top it up so not sure how I'm going to bounce on a flat ball! Might go for a walk instead. Although DP is out for the evening so probably shouldn't encourage anything. Also tomorrow is my day on the family sweepstake

la www.kellymom.com has a lot of good bf stuff on it. It's an American site, but still got a lot of good info. The bfing gurus on here recommend it too if that helps :)

Poor you Splodge hope you feel better soon.

Good luck with your presentation La!

The peer supporters on my local bf support fb page also link to Kellymom a lot (sorry I'll stop spamming you all now )

Have you bounced it out yet pis?? Happy due date anyway!!

That sounds pretty awful splodge, hope the doctors can sort the worst of it out. Can you rest up for today?

Student loans aren't real debt la, you'll be fine! Was it an awkward conversation about money or was it ok? We haven't actually really talked about it yet. I think it will be alright though. What's your work count down? I've not done one properly since the first time but am going to count it out today!

la I'm currently trying to make my way through the LLL book 'The Womanly art of Breastfeeding' it's interesting but a bit heavy, I should probably stop reading it in bed because I'm currently making my way through it about three pages at a time before being overcome with exhaustion it's got some handy pull out and keep reference pages though! I'm not sure there's much in there in the way of sleep stuff...

I'm 36+2 today! I've officially made it to the point that DD came out! Everything's a bit tight today, tries not to get too excited but I think the BH's are caused more by the fact that bump seems to have swapped side...

Happy due date pis!!

Hope you feel better soon splodge :(

Fell over In the middle of the night getting out of bed, combination of trying to stop cat attacking fairy lights again, and getting up and trying to stand in numb leg. I don't know if it's leg cramp or the sciatica, it feels like a cross between the two. Anyway, went down in a big heap, Mr tee leapt out of bed and told me off! Not sure how it was my fault.

I'm being mildly head in sand about the money thing, although I had to do some sums before I decided to move ML forward. its inevitable that we are going to have to move when I drop to stat, our rent is £1250 alone so I wouldn't even cover my half of that, and I think we can probably get something a bit cheaper if we were further away from a station and a bit more out in the sticks. It's a shame because we love this house, but it's only doable If both are working and we've not figured out whether I'm going back or not yet (cost of childcare here is extortionate, basically my whole salary would cover house bills and childcare and nothing else.
I can totally understand why people are put off starting a family, if we'd have thought about the financial implications in depth I dont know if we would have even taken the plunge in the first place.

Sorry, managed to cross post with loads of you earlier! Shows how long it took me to write the post as I was trying to get myself sorted for work.

Still going then pis, twingey cervix was just a tease!

Do you have a breastfeeding class or anything la? Our NHS and NCT do one I think.

That's really tough tee, especially if you have a house you love! Moving with a baby might be fun as well!

I had a shameful diet yesterday. I feel I have to write it down to purge myself so, here it goes, the bad things I ate yesterday: two fun size twixes, bag of mini chocolate buttons (from selection box), THREE(!) hot cross buns, bag of mini eggs. I feel awful about it but didn't feel like that much at the time! Must have been a hungry day...

Morning! Pis, hope that good night's sleep was preparation for events to come...

La the Sears Baby Book has a lot of info about BF and sleep though isn't specific, it covers everything to do with babies. There's a new one out called The Gentle Sleep Book or something - Sarah Ockwell-Smith, very much advocating the normal behaviour of infants vs what we think they should be doing. I may buy it just to remind myself when (no doubt) this one sleeps as little as it's big sister I second Kellymom, there's loads about BF on there.

Ooh I hope your GP can sort you out quickly this morning, Splodge, UTIs are horrid at the best of times!

Happy 36+2 Boo :)

Dulcet I have hungry days too most days. Then I moan a few days later when my bump has had a growth spurt and my skin is all tight and uncomfortable. DH is either being very diplomatic or is ignoring me - either way he doesn't seem to have linked the two, nor has he pointed it out, which is nice.

Thanks 4 sympathy viroids, much appreciated (DP tries but is rubbish at it). Love my docs, got app 1st thing & she gave me antibios even tho no obvious bacteria in wee - just bad dehydration. It feels pretty cystitisish to me tho - back to sitting in the loo sipping dioralyte. Ah the glamour. Really hope there's no more vomming. I hate being sick.

Being sick is awful!

Aww Splodge, that's rubbish. Feel better soon.

Happy due date Pis! (How the hell is it halfway through March already?).

Health visitor thinks I should get GP to do a paeds referral for MicroWil. I'm really not sure though. I imagine the conversation would go thus:

Paed: 'Why have you brought her here?'
Me: 'Um... she cries a lot'
Paed: 'Right. You are aware she's a baby?'

Do you really see a paediatrician because your baby cries a lot?

I dunno though wil if the HV suggests it?

What's your gut feeling? Bearing in mind your experience with miniwil.

I have read one book so far - Lisa Clegg Blissful Baby - which is all about the routine.

I just don't get routine for a baby, they don't have a clue, surely? I guess I will try to establish some framework but from 12 weeks ish, perhaps? Or am I mad?

Re finances - I am going to get in my soapbox here.

What annoys me is, those living on benefits get an increase in benefits if they have more Children but those working take a massive hit on their finances. It just doesn't seem fair to me.

I am really fortunate that, for the time being, my DH earns enough that we won't have to take a huge cut in our standard of living when the baby arrives but we certainly won't be saving money anymore.

I feel nervous about the loss of financial independence. I have always earned my own money. We pool all of our money anyway and put a certain amount into our sole accounts for day to day spends, clothes and socialising separately and so DH has said things will carry on as normal.

Still worrying though!

Thanks viroids I'll be celebrating at Pizza Hut with DS

Isn't everyone on SMP effectively going on non-means tested benefits as employers claim the majority back from the Government? Most of us will be able to claim child benefit too after the baby is born (it won't pay the mortgage but every little helps and all that). Come on BabyPis I'm missing out on £13 quid a week over here ! DP is going to have to help me out financially - not an entirely unreasonable thing for the dad to do of course but I've been financially independent for a very long time and I'm finding it hard to reconcile how it feels to be 'given' money.

Also lucky that I live where I do - can't believe how much you pay in rent Tee! My mortgage is a third of that

Wil I suppose if the HV is recommending it then she's probably crying more than is normal. Is it to look at her reflux issues?

I found my foot pump - my ball is ginormous now! Bounce bounce......

Ha I got stiffed by student loans! Was expecting my repayments to fall in line with my earnings but the buggers asked me to go on direct debit as I'm in my final year so the repayments won't change when my income falls. Feels amazing to think it'll be paid off in about six months time though - nearly 14 years after graduating!

Happy due date Pis

The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding is the bf bible supposedly. I never got chance to read it in the end - after having it on my kindle for my entire pregnancy I read the first chapter - it's very Breast is Best standpoint (as you'd expect). The Gentle Sleep Book by Sarah Ockwell Smith has been recommended to me several times.

I'm rubbish with books. I like the Kellymom site though.

Yeah stat mat is basically a government handout so we're all on it. I also don't really think it's that much fun bringing up kids on benefits. I can't believe your rent Tee, my mortgage is half that. Crazy southern prices. We will be living on limited funds for the foreseeable future. Not sure if we'll manage once mat pay stops but will cross that bridge when we come to it.

Yeah maybe it's not normal for her to be upset so much. I dunno. MiniWil was pretty screamy too when she was that age. Right. Nap time.

I don't think I was explaining myself well I certainly don't think that living on benefits is a champagne lifestyle, it's just those that are do not necessarily need to think about money when deciding to have another child.

Probably still come out all wrong!

I would go with your gut wil

Yep, I've rented since I was 18 so always been on that hamster wheel, my old job I lived all over the UK, but I made the decision to move back 'home' about 5 years ago, and the only way we could do it was to rent, the kind of deposit we'd need for a house here is just ludicrous, and although we have some savings, it is nowhere near enough, and we can't make a big enough dent in the deposit saving while we rent, so keep renting, etc etc. it does really suck.
Mmmmm Pizza Hut sounds amazing pis yum. I actually overpaid my SL and they neglected to tell me, and it took frigging months to get the overpayment back. They were very quick to take it mind!

Discovered all the previous OBEMs are on demand at the moment :) they are giving me the willies a bit tho.

Sorry Fleur, wasn't having a go. Probably came out a bit wrong as I'm tired. MiniWil would not oblige me my naptime plan . Aaargh.

Tee that really sucks. Not that owning your own place is important but crap you have to spend so much in rent.

I've just posted a 'do you feel the baby love' query on the October thread but I guess everyone there is a similar stage to me so it may be too early for us to be feeling it - but I'm worried I'm already an awful mother!

So to all of you who are further on - at what stage did you start feeling emotionally attached to your baby?

I do really want my baby of course and can't bear the thought of anything happening - but I don't feel like I 'love' it.....so at what point does that kick in? Or should it have already?!

God that came across as cold hearted, I'm not I promise!

Not cold hearted just honest! I have found it hard to particularly 'bond' with bump both times. Doesn't really feel real to me until baby is out to be honest! Don't think there's anything wrong with that. Ah my antibiotics have kicked in - blessed relief from cystitis but feeling utterly wiped out by the sickness. My cats enjoying the lazy day in bed with me tho!