Summer holidays are over, the PESH are bringing their bumps and baybees back to school

[TheOriginalWinkly]

Pack your giant pants in your satchel and maternity pads in your pencil case, it's the antenatal thread for BESH graduates

CRESH

Faith - pinky faithlet arrived 14th April 2013
Pinkr - suitably pinky one arrived 25th August 2013
Jethro - blue one arrived 23rd September 2013
Noks - pink one arrived 12th January 2014
Frankel - large pink one arrived 10th March 2014
Merks - pink one landed safe and sound 21st March 2014
Sinky - Stubborn blue one arrived 26th March 2014
Driz - blue one arrived 12th June 2014
Kat - pink one arrived 21st June 2014
draf - pink calf on 1st July 2014
winks - a pink one dragged out kicking and screaming on 4th July 2014
euro - a pink one in a hurry to see the world, born on 17th July 2014
dor - a pink one born at speed on 28th July 2014
ginge - completing the ESH Summer of Pink on 23rd August 2014

PESH
Buggerlugs - Buglet due 20th October
Fankle - ESHlet expected 4th January
Cunty - Minichops expected 7th February

People can be such tits. MiniWink was so frightened she fell asleep a few minutes later and slept for an hour while I shopped. kat little Kitten was obviously sleeping and grabbing through terror, not contentment

bugs hope you start feeling less shitty, literally and figuratively, soon.

How was last night Bugs? Hope you had some decent rest.

Well the tablets from the doctor have done their work, droid is here . First one for 18 months, I'd forgotten how much this hurts

kat I love it when C clings to my like a little koala. So cute.

Yuk to returning droid, frank, even if it is all in a good cause.

That sounds good bugs. It sounds like you are doing really well. We're just about to move on to the baby sleeping bags now it is getting chillier. It has worked out well as she had just reached the minimum weight for them as the weather has turned.

Baby wearing is awesome. DSis wasn't bothered with Dnephew1 but with DN2 since he is super cuddly and they go out in the camper a lot she wants to buy my Tula off me (I'm getting a toddler one soon!). Some people are just daft and ill-informed.

Sorry it's been so crap bugs. Glad to hear they've finally got to the bottom of it and hope the antibiotics kick in soon.

Babywearing is awesome. Shame about the cheesy name, but it's quicker than saying 'carrying baby in a sling, wrap or ssc' :)

frank sorry about the droid, but isn't it odd for it not to have any deeper meaning? When mine started, aside from the outrage, I momentarily waited for the disappointment and sadness out of habit. Felt good when I remembered!

kat was it you whose hair has started falling out? Mine has too. It's gross.

MiniWink seems to have put herself into a pattern of feeding and napping starting at around 10am every day. That would be marvellous, but everything starts at 1030 - buggyfit, baby sensory, even church - and I just can't get out. I needed to have left 10 minutes ago but she's been on my boob for 20. I try to feed her earlier but she simply isn't interested. Poo.

How annoying, winks. Leaving the house with a baby can be so hard!

My hair has started going too. I keep covering C in it. Boooo. It was so nice and thick.

Yeah my hair is coming out in handfuls. Its all over everywhere. And it had been so thick and shiny :(

I am a total zombie today. Fortunately my big baybee has perked up now, he seemed so unwell. I had about three half hour naps all night.

Winks, R was a bugger for that - feeding at inconvenient times. He also wasn't (isn't) one you could "top up" feed to let you get out. He feeds when he needs to and will let you know if there's any delay...

It does get better - partly I think because I know (and am confident!) that he can go 4 hours plus if needed that I'm willing to drag him out, and also he's distractible enough that he soon forgets that he wanted a feed (but that distractibility does mean he's still a bugger to feed when out and about..)

Short answer, it will get better, honest. If you can face it, try and drag miniwinks out anyway - pick a friendly group, be able to leave early if needs be. Repeat to yourself - she will not starve. I got quite isolated when R's feeding was at it's worst.

Oh, and weaning helps. I may have started at 4.5ish months for this v reason. It's amazing how well sucking a cucumber stick can pacify a ratty baby.

I had the same problem with groups but at a later age. I found some afternoon for a while till he went to one nap in the afternoon. I guess you could try to engineer a 9 am nap on your way to where you are going. Leave house about 9, drive her to sleep, park up and read a book, wake her for a feed at 10 ish before your activity starts. At this stage she might be ready for a loose routine and having naps at similar times each day. We are on 4 naps most days, two in the morning and two in the afternoon.

I used to do exactly what kat suggested. I would leave at 9am for a 10am group, she would nod off and I would drink tea from a thermos mug. Sometimes I had to feed her at 10.45 in the group but it worked. I have a friend who went to 3 groups a week. It's really not necessary. Not when they're tiny!

Glad the bigger kitten is improving kat.

I used to go to the drive through and have a mc breakfast!

I think I'm going to need to head out early and feed when we arrive as I sit with a book and a drink. She is highly unlikely to nod off in the car, in fact normally she waits until I've reached the dual carriageway then starts screaming with hunger, no matter when she's been fed. sinks she's just like R, no chance of a top up feed. She's either not hungry, or hungry-now-feed-me-I'm-going to expire.

The baby groups aren't for her benefit, they're for mine. We live in a new build estate miles from anywhere except a woodland. There's a small retail park in walking distance as well. All my friends live on the other side of London, at least an hour away by public transport and more driving if traffic is bad. I don't have any family in England either, and HWCA works long shifts. If I didn't get out I would go absolutely bananas.

kat I'm glad Bigger Kitten is improving.

Yup- baby groups deffo for you. That's why I stopped going to the one that demanded I carried R round with 9 other mums and babies in a bastardised version of stripping the willow. Horrid.

Up. Operation "sleep in own room/cot" not going well. Would it be so bad to carry on bed sharing?

Operation own room failed with us on the minikit. He stayed with us until 8.5 months, mainly in bed or in the pram carry it. I put a lindam rail on my side of the bed. Once he got mobile and could have technically got himself out of the carrycot or crawled around the bed we went cold turkey on the cot but he invariably ended up next to me at some point anyway until he dropped the last night feed.

Fucking horrible night. Up from midnight to 3 when I cracked and brought him in with me. GHJ woke him at 5.45 when he came in to get some clothes (needs to go into work this morning to speak to boss). Has been screaming since. Is fine if we get up and play but I'm bone tired.

I can't do this. But I'm not sleeping well when we're co sleeping and I don't want to be co sleeping once I'm back at work (dec), so it's got to be done.

How can I do this on my own?

That's sounds rough Sinks, though I will say thatits amazing what you can cope with when you just get your head down and plow on. I'm still surprised both E and I survived the last four months

Would you consider some kind of sleep training? Most methods (gradual retreat, sush/pat and even the dreaded CC/CIO ) are suitable from 6 months old.

I've tried CIO/CC, sort of - R cries till he vomits within a few minutes and I lose my nerve.

And I already do the shush/pat - it's the only way he'll settle (not quiet at self settling...). Was doing it for several hours last night!

sinks, sorry about the shitty night. Afraid I don't have any suggestions - we cosleep for part of the night too.

Sleep deprivation is vile. We have just bitten the bullet and done sleep training with The Little Mister. It took 3 nights but it was hellish!

Sorry that people are finding it tough, you'll get through it!

I'm in a PANIC, completely head fucked, cried all the way home last night I had my first mid-wife appointment yesterday which went ok except for when I said I didn't want to give birth (FUCKING TERRIFIED OF THIS!!). I know it seems weird but it's never been something I want to do, ever since I was a child myself I've wanted a caesarian, I KNOW I will panic (I'm already doing that!) and I feel like I've lost control already, this is my absolute nightmare, the loss of control, I don't think BR will support me in a decision to have a caesarian so I feel utterly defeated and un-supported, BR is the only person I have near me to help and I feel like I don't even have that. My anxiety levels are through the roof, I don't see my therapist for another two weeks and my boss let slip to people at work who didn't know and who I wasn't going to tell till "the big reveal" in two weeks, another control loss, it's all going too fast and out of my hands

I just realised that in the last 20 months of pregnancy/miscarriage/ttc I've never actually stopped to plan having an actual baby, we haven't saved any money and now only have 7 months to save, pay off credit cards, have some housework done. If I only get 9 weeks of full pay we're fucked, our family car is on a hire purchase scheme with work which comes off my wages before tax, what happens when I'm not getting paid? What do people do? How do you make all this work? I have no idea, I'm in a downward spiral, sat here just bawling in a depressed panic paralysed with fear