Due March 2007 - No. 3

[novadandypowder]

Ahem - allow me....

Kittywits, FWIW I'd say you were very highly valued, particularly on this thread.

had my booking in appt today - midwife asked me what sort of birth I was looking for - c-section or vbac. I told her I had already had 2 sections and I was told when having the 2nd that a 3rd would be a matter of course. Was geared up for 3rd section.... now not so sure although c-section is best for keeping all sorted - especially dd1 and her needs.

WHen I mentioned that to the midwife she offered to arrange a social worker to chat to me about the pressures I am under what organising child care for my children whilst I am having surgery and whilst in hospital.

See consultant in 4 weeks - same one I had for dd2 ( can be unusual - usually luck of the draw who you see)

ended my day with a visit to A & E with dd2 - who has a pulled elbow - been in a lot of pain and poor thing!!

Have any of you read 'Families and How to Survive Them' by John Cleese and Robin Skynner?

We swear by it in my family. In fact, it inspired DH to start a course of therapy to try to rid himself of some demons before LO arrives. Can't recommend it highly enough: life-changing.

Had a long day with the outlaws yesterday. Everyone was reasonably well-behaved, but SIL was very frazzled from recent relationship meltdown, and 3 yr old niece looked very tired and subdued

DH was angry all the way home (think the therapy has kicked up some dust he'd thought he'd shaken off), and I ended up avoiding him for the rest of the evening. Easier said than done in a 2-bedroom flat.

La la la.

Annie/Aime - I didn't feel DD move until 20 weeks, though she was my second. I kept thinking something was wrong, but she was fine and once she got going, wouldn't stop If fact, I used to have to sleep on my back; because if I went on my side, she would always jump around until I reverted to sleeping on my back again - she's a stroppy little mare now - so no surprises

TBH I think it just depends on the baby's position - if its feet are inside (as opposed to pushing against your tummy wall) you're less likely to feel it.

Onilly - I love the psycho analysis bit. Hope I don't manipulate my kids as much as my Mum did us . When you have kids yourself it kind of helps you understand your own parents a bit more doesn't it? Notwithstanding that though, I still think Ma is completely potty!

Ditto the over-acheiving bit, I'm supposed to be starting a PhD (at some point.....) and I secretly think I'm still trying to prove to myself that I'm not the stupid one! Irony is, Lil Sis is er... shall we say "academically challenged" but Ma still makes comments like "oooh, she's so lucky to be sooo beautiful and soooooo intelligent". I've acheived loads more than either sister, academically, career wise and family wise etc but it has never been acknowledged at all by my parents
Can you detect a bit of sibling rivalry creeping in here ?

Anyway, 'nuff of that

Had my scan at Queen Charlotte's today - the baby is fine and the right size for dates etc. No baby or placental bleeding detected either, which is a huge relief

Have consultant at 2.20pm to check my cervix etc . Apparently he's a dish - so

Small new worry though - QC advised me today that as I'm over 40, they "will deliver the baby at 38 weeks"!!! . As it is their "policy" for older Mums. I was tempted to say "like feck you will!".

Any tips on holding them off nearer the time? Suppose I could just not answer the phone for 2 weeks

onilly - I found the first movements to feel like popcorn was popping under my belly button. I've felt a few movements when I've been in bed being very still but it's still very early days for me yet.

I'm soooooooooooooooooo excited about having this baby

Noo is 1 on sunday . I can't believe how quickly my little bubba is growing.

Fatfox... lucky you enjoy your appointment. :D When I saw my GP to havea little moan, I was kinda uncomfortable as he looked younger than me.. I'm 26 and I was convinced that he shouldn't have been a GP yet!

I think I feel some movement, esp when I'm sat still on the sofa at night. DH's cooking isn't that bad as to give me wind every time! LOL.

My Mum is great. I feel very lucky to have her... my MIL on the other hand... I'm not sure. She e-mailed my Mum to see if I was keeping up the the house work last week. If she wants to know that. she can ask me.

Eidsvold, that's very strange, how do you feel about that? social worker ?

Annie, I appreciate you saying that ( I wanted to say that was kind of you, but you're not offering charity ). You see, my sensible head knows that to be true. I am learning to control my mad mother controlled head

Whoowhoo, I have heard of that book, I'll buy it. Ah yet ANOTHER self help book. My bedside table is groaning under the weight of the things. But I find the ones that are personally recommended are usually worth the read.

Bloody hell Fatfox, good news on babe Their plicy. Sorry, you've got me going now , deep breath, Aghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Aghhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!
just vey politely say "no thankyou " and that's an end to it. What a load of absolute tripe.
listen, for my three vbacs i've held of the medical establishment three times while I waited three weeks for each of those babies to arrive. For the last one I also held out for a home birth. If you want any support at the end with this just come to old arsy kitty and I'll sort them out for you

fatfox - glad your scan went well. I'm shocked at all these mad hospital policies

Aime - perhaps MIL wants to offer to come round and do the housework for you???

Kitty/TheBlonde - we'll see, baby will come when its good and ready. My last two both came 2/3 days before EDD anyway. This one is not being pulled out at 38 weeks, just 'cos some ejit has written a policy on it! Seems completely barbaric to me
.......Kitty, you are my "arsey mentor" at the moment

Fatfox... in an ideal world, with a different MIL, that maybe the case! But... I really doubt it! LOL. I was told to remember it was THEIR first Grandchild! I was left blinking.. thinking hold on a minute love, I understand that but... its OUR first CHILD! maybe I'm unreasonable, but I'm fearing the worse with MIL.

I agree, though a novice, that a baby is born when its ready, I can understadn the need to intervene in extreme circumstances, but just cause someone is deemed to be an "Old Mother" means they "deliver" two weeks early. Can't they just monitor more carefully or something?

AmieR, when dd1 was born I got flowers from the inlaws Congratulations on the birth of our 5th Grandchild.

Gee thanks.

and

No Way? stunned

I was reading the thread about putting stress on new mums, and someone said their IL's came to visit in hospital and the Mother had just got baby to latch on for a feed, and the MIL walked right up to her and pulled the LO straight off her breast to "have a look"!

How exactly do they think they're going to do that Fatfox? Tie you down and caesar you without so much as a by-your-leave?

Of course, I understand that our pod-like bodies are no longer our own but the property of the medical profession...

btw, did anyone watch that birth prog on C5 last night? I watched the 1st half, then switched over for Jane Eyre. Was nice seeing the baby girl with her Mum, but the presenters were insufferable I thought: especially the man.

Aime - shouldn't you be doing the housework or something? Not sitting on MN?

Whoowhoo - I saw it - could peel myself away. Watching the C section made me even more determined - I'd only have one in a dire life threatening emergency (but that's just hippy me though ). does make me want to consider having a home birth though. One of the reasons I chose QC, was I thought they supported mother's choices

Loved the quadruplets - and did you see the ringlets on the quadruplets Mum? She really is blessed!

Fox - you know I would be doing nothing but Housework if I wasn't at work! I'm taking it easy today after a tiring weekend! Pleasures of being my own boss

I watched bits of it. thought the bit with Baby Daniel and his op while he was in the womb was amazing, but overall it made me an emotional wreck, and the male presenter was rather iritating.

The lady who had the little boy via CS was so calm!

fatfox-thats mad!ive been induced at 38 weeks with my last 3 due to my bp being way too high and getting higher,and even then they asked me about 4 times if i was certain i knew the risks involved with delivering early blah blah(i was like,yes,just get it out,i am no way going through what i did the first time).good to hear everything is ok though

rosy-i went a bit wild after i split with ds and dd1's father,i think i was 23 then.i think you have to go a bit mad when u come out of an abusive relationship,but i never went near any men who were already involved.

annied-lol at ur tardis womb i didnt start showing till week 24 with no.4 and this time im even smaller.thats prob why i cant feel much movement cos the bab has plenty of room in there!

kitty/fatfox/onilly-what thread about mothers?

Diva - Your thread!!! We kind of hijacked it to moan about our mother's - sorry

I really want to do a link to my new thread, but don't know how

anyone take pity on me? Annie? (grovel, grovel emoticon)

BTW, WTF does url mean??

here you go!

Annie - thanks Babe. Will do the same for you if I ever work out how!!

URL = Uniform Resource Locator

Amie - if you think it's bad now, wait until you have the baby. Then you'll find that everything which is different to the way it was in "their day" is wrong. My MIL turned up on out doorstep the first day I had ds at home, saying she'd come to give him his 10 o'clock bottle. She didn't quite get the concept of breastfeeding on demand!

Aime, what is Uniform Resource Locator when its at home then ?

please don't scare me Lunar! DH says to ignore her, but its easier for him to say that if YSWIM.

fox.. basically a URL is the address of a website or a link within a website. Its just the location of a certain file or document that is stored on the web and the URL tells your browser where to find it and display it to you.

Fatfox that is crazy! I will be 40 at edd it would be bonkers to suggest that should mean an early delivery. weirdos! hey first time I used that emoticon!

Yeah Diva I wouldn't go near a married man with a barge pole but my sis did. though no kids were involved apart from the one my sis was expecting by the married man. They are still together and happy but it was a mess at the time.

I've read that surviving families book and remember it being brill but can't remember what was in it now. (head like a sieve) My family was a bit complex.It was very rich(though not £wise) and mostly fab. My mother caused me some difficulties but I think I've processed it now.

Most of my inlaws are in Pakistan. Safe distance They are lovely but I bet if they lived near I would be tortured with too much af a good thing!

Ok now I've read your thread and I think I would find it hard not to give in to those emotive arguments.