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September 2014 reaching the final stretch!

993 replies

ilovemonstersInc · 06/06/2014 11:42

Last thread was full.
Some of us are in the last trimester and some nearly there!! Eeek not long left!

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KitKat1985 · 30/06/2014 20:59

cookielove glad you got to see the midwife straight away. At least you got to have a low down of what to expect. I hope you manage to get a bit of your new ice cream though. Grin

RedToothBrush as an NHS worker I would say not to worry too much about strike action. I went on strike as a nurse about 2 years ago and it was only non-essential workers who were allowed to strike (as agreed by the union), and I suspect the midwives will do something similar (so there may not be any outpatients appointments that day, or routine midwifery clinics, but I very much doubt the midwives on the labour wards will be walking out, and emergency care will still be available). xx

RedToothBrush · 30/06/2014 21:06

Yes but one of the things they are likely to do is cancel ELCS.

This is a problem for me.

Topsyloulou · 30/06/2014 22:21

Fairy hope you're feeling better now. Hopefully she'll stay put for a good few weeks. You know we're all here if you ever need a rant / hug etc

Cookie sorry to hear about the GD, hopefully you won't have to make too many changes to your diet to manage it.

I saw about the midwife strike too, hopefully it's nothing for us to worry about as they still need to do another ballot & these things take time to agree normally.

Got a fun day coming up tomorrow, nurse at 7.20am for whooping cough jab & blood test & then work is shaping up to be a cracker of a day. There is a company wide announcement tomorrow but in addition to this there have been lots of meetings with HR in my area so im worried we're having a restructure which normally means redundancies. Could be worrying about nothing but not the sort of stress I need right now. Fingers crossed my job is safe.

Fairypants · 30/06/2014 23:01

I hope it's nothing to worry about topsy. My company had a restructure when I was in mat leave with dd2 and my whole department was closed down but they managed to find a role elsewhere for me- I think they were too scared to risk looking bad when it comes to discrimination. Hopefully your company will be the same ic that is what it is.
What a rude comment white! I have a colleague who keeps commenting on my size- he thinks I must be nearly due and can't get bigger but I console myself with the fact that a) mw measured me as bang on dates last week, and b) he clearly has no idea what he's talking about. I'd be really annoyed at another mum making that sort of rude comment.
After phone call 10 and six weeks since I ordered the furniture, I finally got a call back from mothercare this evening about the missing parts. They have arranged to send me an entire replacement wardrobe as they can't sort out the three parts that arrived broken! They have also promised to send it by a different courier as the normal ones take two weeks (and didn't even bother to turn up first time round). It remains to be seen if anything happens but at least someone called back finally. It's such a shame as my local store it really great. The staff are helpful and friendly and go out of their way to give good service but I wouldn't get anything delivered by them ever again- even if it was free, it's not worth the stress.

ilovemonstersInc · 01/07/2014 07:09

Dont need the added stress of thinking about a strike now thanks.

Been a little crampy all day yesterday and last night had to change undies as id been 'leaking' so thought id leave it overnight and see what happens in the morning. Still been leaking over night undies were wet. Sorry tmi I know. Felt off yesterday so will probably go up and get checked as im still leaking. Its not huge amounts but enough to make me feel uncomfortable as its filling undies.

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KitKat1985 · 01/07/2014 08:56

Hmm, got an e-mail from mothercare this morning to say they've got a big sale on, which is good as we've still got some loads of things to buy, but loads of people on here seem to have had some sort of issue with mothercare online so not sure if it's worth the stress. Hmm

Ilove crossing my fingers for you that everything is fine when you get checked out later. xxx

ilovemonstersInc · 01/07/2014 09:04

Thank you.

Ive never had a problem ordering clothes from them as ive done it a few times in the past. Takes around 5ish days for clothes to come

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Fairypants · 01/07/2014 09:16

I really hope it's nothing ilove.

Kitkat- it's probably worth a try with smaller things that can go with a normal courier. Worst case is you can always cancel the order if they are being hard work. I'm in this annoying situation where I have some if the furniture and parts of other pieces and don't want to cancel the rest as I want it to match.

ilovemonstersInc · 01/07/2014 10:12

Just ordered some bras that were half price. Im still in under wired bras.
Will see whos gets here first lol

My pad is a lil damp not soaking but if I don't wear 1 my undies end up soaked so im guessing the pads absorbing it rather than letting me feel it?

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whiteblossom · 01/07/2014 10:41

Red its unlikely to be anything to worry about. The ecs will be brought forward or put back- they will have to plan around any strike and as kitkat said they wont all walk out leaving women in labour! They have to put the health and safety of the patient first.

Arghh yes mothercare, sale starts today. I think they are fine for small items just not furniture! That said the reason I got the free bedding was a result of staff instore refusing to exchange an item bought online (I just wanted to swap colours) but as it was more expensive instore they said either return or pay difference....so I rang customer services who stuck by this...until I pointed out he was wrong and so he had a chat with his manager and hey presto he had to eat humble pie.

Last night I wanted to start making the curtain for the babys room....only when I rolled out my obscenely expensive designer fabric it is so badly damaged I cant use it! Im gutted and now Im goingto have to try and sort it out but I can see them being very difficult about it.

I have been able to feel the babys back sticking out for months- he's never changed position. I get elbows and knees scraping across my belly....urrghh.

I cant brave the scales....its just too scary now.

Ilove have you spoken to your mw..?

Topsyloulou · 01/07/2014 11:44

Ilove - hope everything is ok & you've managed to speak to the midwife.

So I've been put on consultation for redundancy today. There are 5 of us doing my job & they only need 4 moving forward. Feel really awkward as if I do get to keep my job I'll be leaving in 8 weeks on mat leave. Fortunately (I think) I don't have to go through the interview process again. Will be a long 30 days!

ilovemonstersInc · 01/07/2014 12:38

Thank you. Just on the way to the hospital. Kids are with dm so dont have them to worry about

hope you still get to keep your job topsy. That's the last thing you need to worry about

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whiteblossom · 01/07/2014 12:40

fx for you topsy.

CumbrianExile · 01/07/2014 12:41

Ilove - hope everything is ok at the midwife.

Topsy - fingers crossed for the redundancy situation.

I have just been painting the nursery - few days off work and this is what I am doing!! Left DH to do the top of the walls now as he won't let me climb on the ladder even though he is scared of heights!!

Teabiscuits · 01/07/2014 12:42

donteven how strange - my first was 6lb14 - episiotomy and forceps delivery. I had a nasty 2nd degree tear with 2nd, (agree with you about it not really hurting much as well!) I'm expecting number 4... lots of things we have in common!

fairy hope you are ok Thanks . It really sounds like you've been having a crappy time of it, hope everything works out.

ilove I also get very damp pants sometimes, and I've had it before in pregnancy. When I got checked out last I wasn't leaking fluid, just copious amounts of watery discharge Confused (sorry if Tmi). Hopefully it will be the same thing for you x

I'm the Mum stuck organising the teacher's end of year present again. I volunteered to be 'link parent' at the beginning of the year, but that was before getting preg! I don't mind, but I've got a lot of other stuff on as well, and there are tons of Mums there who don't work, have no kids at home all day and aren't pregnant. I thought maybe someone would offer to help, but they're all just like 'oh do you mind organising it? That's sooo helpful thanks!', before rushing off to the gym or for coffee or whatever else it is they do during the day! Please don't think I'm knocking stay at home Mums, I'm really not, my point is they all witnessed me nearly fainting outside the classroom recently but I have not had a single offer of help...

Sorry, needed to vent!

RedToothBrush · 01/07/2014 12:51

whiteblossom Tue 01-Jul-14 10:41:28
Red its unlikely to be anything to worry about. The ecs will be brought forward or put back- they will have to plan around any strike and as kitkat said they wont all walk out leaving women in labour! They have to put the health and safety of the patient first.

I had the ELCS booked at 16 weeks to alleviate and stress and fears around uncertainty throughout my pregnancy. Its been brilliant and has really helped by being done so early. By now having this possibility hanging over it, its removed this security blanket for me. Its playing into and feeding all the fears I had to begin with and my worst case scenario nightmares.

So this is really bothering me. One of my worst fears has always been having an ELCS cancelled because I fear its a deliberate tactic to reduce them and effectively force you to have a vb. And I've previously had panic attacks and nightmares about the about the ward being closed due to overcrowding (not helped by paranoia about having a September baby). I've already had to have support and reassurance neither of this situations is going to happen. So the threat of a strike is undermining and making me feel very anxious again.

I already feel like I'm the bottom of the list for 'needing' an ELCS as it is. I'm the 'easiest' one to bump off the list in the minds of a lot of people. Mental health reasons not being considered as important as physical ones (perhaps rightly so, if you are talking life and death situations). But I still feel I am at risk here. In terms of health and safety, I do not see how you can have any level of strike without some compromise on health and safety. The issue is how you measure that. If it all go tits up for me as a result, nothing would appear on any report, because its not the type of information which is recorded. It'll just be 'tough shit'.

I simply don't know if I could cope with the prospect of changing my ELCS date. I think I'd go into a massive melt down over it. This has been such a long and emotional journey to get to this point as it is. The politics of childbirth, I've found to be dreadful and too frequently about budgets and beliefs rather than about women's needs and research. I can just about get my head around the baby coming early naturally or for medical need as there isn't anything that can be done (though I find this is difficult), but it changing because of a strike, fills me with horror at this stage. I'm comfortable with the date I have, but worry about a delay because of the implications of me going into labour and worry about having the baby too early for its sake based on the research out there.

My issues of trust in those caring for me and whether my interests really are their top priority are pretty deep seated but I have made some progress. Progress that I don't want to go right back to square one with.

Trouble is I can't avoid the extra stress that this has now brought. I wish I could just switch off like everyone else seems to have already done. It does make me feel like shit, because it seems legitimate to worry about physical worries but not this.

The irony is my blood test result came back this week (the blood test no one wanted to do) and they sent me a letter requesting a repeat without stating why. I've been less anxious about that as Dr Google has been more reassuring than latest round of trying to follow it up. (Long story short - was told they couldn't book one, despite the letter telling me to). I am getting a long list of notes/letters going missing (it became apparent that yet another one walked in Feb last week), no one taking responsibility for anything and just giving me incorrect information.

Don't get me wrong, everyone has been really nice and given me lots of time at appointments, which is more than some of you seem to be getting, but some of the incidents trouble me, as the potential problems could have been serious (thankfully to my knowledge its all been minor). Given my anxiety is about HCPs, trust in them and my problems trying to communicate issues with them and is documented as being a medical issue its not exactly a great state of affairs though. Its beginning to feel like a real battle, I'm constantly going round in circles and that my notes are completely and utterly pointless. I'm dreading appointment with midwife tomorrow as I'm pretty sure its going to be more of the same too for various reasons.

Whilst I appreciate that midwives, really need to be valued and I do - my experiences have been on the whole positive, I can't help but feel that someone is going to suffer as a result of any strike regardless of any measures they put in to 'protect' women. I'm not sure I can reconcile my very strong feelings over the real need to improve maternity services and knowing the price that a strike comes at.

whiteblossom · 01/07/2014 13:14

red, why don't you have a chat with the mw tomorrow and discuss your current fears over the strike and see if she can help put your fears at rest. Perhaps have a list of questions and don't leave until you have the answers.

Everyone is anxious about labour and everyone wants support of a mw and to feel that they are being cared for and that everything will be ok. I would point out that your fear (mental health) will be seen as a genuine medical reason.

The blood test could be something of nothing- ive had this myself, my gp was a little ott with my results (best to be safe than sorry though!) but the hospital was not at all concerned and explained why.

RedToothBrush · 01/07/2014 14:33

I'm pretty sure the blood test is nothing to worry about. I missed a couple of iron tablets last week by accident as I was out a couple of nights and had a couple of days where I felt a bit faint, so it adds up perfectly. Its just annoying that you get a letter telling you to book a repeat, ring up and are told you can't make one because you aren't medically qualified!!! Why send out the letter asking to arrange an appointment? It turned out they issued a request in Feb for repeats before but neither me nor the GP got it that time, so I guess this is an improvement of sorts.

Eventually did sort out a repeat blood test appointment yesterday after questioning it and asking to speak to a midwife at the hospital. It was booked but said they couldn't tell me the date, they would just send out a letter! (Said generically produced letter has just arrived as it goes.)

I'm expecting the local midwife tomorrow to know nothing about any of this though nor have a clue about why they want repeats.

Got to be honest, I'm fairly reluctant to discuss ELCS stuff or strike stuff with her, because of her attitude previously and going on about labour and VBs in the past despite my notes (I didn't correct her as I didn't feel comfortable to). The difference in attitude between the hospital and the local community midwives is very marked. They are totally different cultures. Not sure she would know anyway, as thats 'hospital stuff' and the impression that keeps coming across is simply that 'they do things differently there' so I think she'd just say to ask at my next appointment there anyway.

I'm bracing myself about her tomorrow as it is, as I'm expecting to be told that the baby is transverse or breech (its lumps and bumps are definitely not where they are supposed to be right now!) and how this might mean I need an ELCS blah, blah, blah given what she said at the last appointment with her. I'm fairly ok with it being either as its a bit of a none issue under the circumstances (Though transverse worries me a little due to increased risk of prolapsed cord and can indicate other problems. It would be bloody typical to end up with a 'naughty' baby and have a physical need for an ELCS after everything!) I dunno, I just am not as confident in discussing certain things with her, because she appears to have a particular mindset. She's very nice, but I think my case is something of an unusual one and there's no consistency of care for it and lots of places don't really 'get' it.

I think panic is starting to set in if I'm honest, and I'm petrified of other peoples reactions/responses about how I feel and ELCS. Last week I had an appointment about birth plan, and everything is starting to freak me out. That and how everyone here is worrying about totally different things to me. I'm fine with loads of stuff other people have been stressed about but crazy about other weird things. I'm struggling a little and feel a bit of a freak.

EllaBella220 · 01/07/2014 14:54

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ilovemonstersInc · 01/07/2014 15:56

Thank you all.

Been in. Waste of time. The cramping has ramped up a gear too now but couldn't do the test to check for prem labour due to ? Over waters. Waters 'ok from what I can see' baby is laid across still. His heart rate kept going upto 190 but apparently was fine and tightenings showing on the monitor. If cramping continues come back if it gets worse come back etc.

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ilovemonstersInc · 01/07/2014 16:00

Forgot to say baby was measuring 41 weeks today.
How on earth does that happen!

Glad the scan went well Ella x

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EllaBella220 · 01/07/2014 16:10

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EllaBella220 · 01/07/2014 16:11

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ilovemonstersInc · 01/07/2014 16:29

They couldn't say Confused

At 28weeks he was 5 weeks ahead. At 30 weeks he was 6 weeks ahead and today 10 weeks Shock I know it's not entirely accurate but hes definitely big.

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ilovemonstersInc · 01/07/2014 16:30

Red your fears arw true here.

This baby is transverse

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