October 2014 - thread 6 - BLUE/PINK/YELLOW the finding out begins!!!

[sazzlehopes]

The fun and chat continues! We are heading over halfway ladies. Old thread is here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2052958-October-2014-thread-5-Bigger-bumps

The best advice I got was to read up on BF if you want to do it. Over 80% of preggers women in the UK want to EBF but less than 6% still are by 6 months and most stop within the first month - its a mental game and you need to understand the process a bit so you don't panic and give up at a growth spurt. Read the Kellymom website, chat to a BF pal or go to a BF support group in pregnancy even - to get the basics (basically trust your body, get a good latch, three hourly feeds at first 4 hourly is for bottles and can kill your supply and keep them at the boob if they're fussing - fussing at the breast is how they make milk not a sign you don't have enough, and don't have formula in the house unless you want to FF). It starts off harder but becomes dead easy whereas bottles are easier initially but harder work long term.

Can I just suggest practising with a doll for first time breast feeders? Just so you know what your arms are doing! Felt really wierd first time I did it.

We aren't buying much as still got everything from nearly 3 year old DS is the attic including lots of unisex clothes (he basically wore rainbow coloured unisex clothes for the first 9 months; I had an aversion to the sky blue/brown options that seemed ubiquitous for baby boys at the time).

I will get a new a carrier though -never really got on with mine last time and I think I'm going to want to use it more this time. I had a stretchy fabric one, I'd prefer a structured one, thinking about the stokke mycarrier.

Agree about the Kellymon website. It had loads of great info about breastfeeding

I struggled at the start with oversupply, undersupply, vasospasm and had to use nipple shields for a couple of weeks but at about 8-10 weeks (and after seeing a lactation consultant) everything was under control and really really easy. My son self weaned at Christmas and was 2 years and 7 months!!

I must admit though that every midwife I saw in hospital had a different way of showing me how he should latch on so I found those early days really stressful although when it did click I couldn't believe how simple it was

A great app which helps during 'fussy phases' and 'sunny phases' and always seemed pretty spot on was the Wonder Weeks. There is a book but the app is great

Antibiotics for the gum/tooth infection have kicked in and the lovely thrush is back oh joy!
The pain has lessened but I get the feeling I will still need more work done and the drugs are just prolonging it. I really wish she would pull them out but insists on removing filling cleaning and refilling.

Bf is definitely harder than I expected, I think women don't really talk about the realities in case it's just them. My best friend just had her first and I was pretty candid about birth and feeding, not to scare her but to prepare her. I was really lucky, easy, quick birth and a baby that latched really easily. Despite this, it really hurts for the first few sucks of each feed in the beginning and I thought I was doing it wrong. And as for the jug... Don't be alarmed! An easy birth still leaves its mark and I think I was ill prepared for that first time round.

Something that was said to another friend, after a pretty difficult birth and a massively traumatic final stage (delivery of placenta), was that the journey is irrelevant, it's the destination that matters. Going home with a healthy baby really is the only important thing.

Our bodies are pretty amazing and I can promise all you first timers, you will feel like a warrior the day your baby arrives, however it happens!!

Pinkie that's awesome! I had to wean DS at 16 months when I found I was expecting as there's a possible prem risk if you BF in pregnancy and my twin had her daughter at 27 weeks maybe as a result of tandem feeding so given DS was a prem I'm officially on the prem watch list this time bet he or she is late!. I was gutted to wean him as I loved it and really hope it clicks again this time as I found nursing such a lovely part of our day. DS was too prem to suckle initially and we had to syringe milk into him for ten days whilst I pumped to get my milk in. I had an amazing MW who kept my confidence up not to give up when he couldn't nurse initially - her son was in the NICU for 28 days before she could BF and she gave me so much encouragement. She kept reassuring me if it doesn't happen straight away don't panic just keep pumping.

Binky I'm a total wuss but birth was awesome (even though mine went a bit off piste and I needed intervention thanks to him coming out the wrong way up) it was amazing, comical, silly, sometimes scary but still the coolest thing I've ever done. Whilst afterwards stuff can be a bit sore the jug and witch hazel and other tricks really help! Post birth isn't glamorous but your DH will be looking at you like you are some amazing super goddess and you have the most gorgeous person in the world in your arms to get to know and who you can cuddle as long as you like.

Oh no gun! That is the last thing you need...

I breast fed all myn ranging from 3 years to 1.5 years for me its the easiest option no sterilising no carrying around supplies to be honest im lazy. I have horror storys that I could tell but wouldn't want to put anyone off as its a wonderful experience

Bump im 35 and have never had thrush before and now at 20 weeks pregnant ive had it twice its defiantly the antibiotics causing it :(

Thank you all for the feedback re: essential purchases; the Mothercare list in particular was very useful. I have a lot still to learn about BF, I've realised.
Thought you might be interested to see my updated and vastly increased list of things which now reads:

Out and about
Pram/pushchair (suitable from birth)
Car seat
Sling
Seat for hands free time

Sleeping
Clip on bednest style crib
Mattress
Waterproof mattress cover
Sheets x4
3x blankets

Bottom/bathing/health matters
Reusable nappies & associated stuff
Bum cream & wipes
Changing mat
Nappy bin (or repurpose lidded bin)
Baby thermometer

Breastfeeding
2x nursing bras
Breast pads
Lansinoh nipple cream
Nipple pads
2x warm nursing nightwear
40x small muslins
3x big muslins

Clothes
Babygros/sleepsuits x12
Long sleeved vests x12
Snowsuit
Hat x2

Playing
Playmat
Playpen
Toys & books

Lady parts
Tea tree oil
Maternity pads

Gun wah

Bump I forgot about that let down pain - it used to set my teeth on edge. That disappears after a while though as they get more adept and your boobs better match supply with demand. I'm dreading learning to latch as once he could latch himself I didn't have to do anything.

Hiya all, hope you are all well. Had my 16 wk well 17+1 appointment. All is good, got to hear baby's heartbeat which was really good, ds who is 19 months wasn't bothered although he was v quite at that point. Appointment was at home.

For those thinking of getting slings, wraps I recommend going to a sling library with baby as you can try for a week or two to see what you think for a small fee without committing to a potentially expensive mistake.

They also have heaps of useful information on the website and have instructions.

Fyi

southlondonslings.co.uk

Hiya all, hope you are all well. Had my 16 wk well 17+1 appointment. All is good, got to hear baby's heartbeat which was really good, ds who is 19 months wasn't bothered although he was v quite at that point. Appointment was at home.

For those thinking of getting slings, wraps I recommend going to a sling library with baby as you can try for a week or two to see what you think for a small fee without committing to a potentially expensive mistake.

They also have heaps of useful information on the website and have instructions.

Fyi

southlondonslings.co.uk

Clapto that looks v thorough. You may well not need that many muslins if you don't have a puker and toys and stuff will come as pressies long before they can even hold or look at them so don't panic if you don't have any before he/she arrives.

I'm currently pondering double buggies. Feck they're expensive. Even on eBay . J is wee and a late walker so I'm not sure I'd be able to do without. He's too much of a wee bugger to stay on a buggy board. Maybe keep him in the buggy and no.2 in a sling initially? We need to do a fair bit of walking with the dog and me not driving.

Clapto I would agree with yellow, I know people say you can never have enough Muslins but 40 is a tad excessive unless it was a type and you meant 4! Also I would get more than 2 nursing bras maybe 4? But wait until you know what size you will end up (mine went up 2 sizes after my milk came in)

We bought first baby items today, a baby enstein playmat was half price and looked really good. Also set up baby plan in mothercare and put down deposit on britax affinity pushchair (carrycot came free) plus britax baby safe plus shr ii car seat and base. Only had to pay £56 today and have until sept to pay the rest off. However I'm now having second thoughts about the pushchair it looks good and maneuveres well bit is almost double the weight of our babyjogger, shopping basket isn't very big either. Hmm don know think more research needs to be done. At least I can cancel it if I need to.

Anyone else got there 20 week scan this week? My one is on Tuesday.

Mine is a week on Tuesday. Had to change it from this week due to work.

Apart from being tired, I don't feel pregnant at the moment. And the tired could be because we've been on a walking weekend in Cornwall, albeit with boring baby couple (who didn't really walk anywhere)

No Gun mine's not til June 5th. Good luck! Am v envious!!!

We have a britax car seat and its fab. I've not heard of the britax affinity buggy but maybe sign up for a Which subscription and check out the reviews before the month free trial ends. I did that for all big baby stuff! . We had the M&P sola which I loved but sold that for an off road buggy (the nipper 360) when we got the dog. I love how manoeuvreable it is one handed (great for secretly scoffing lunch on the move or trying to control a bouncing border terrier). I'm thinking of the baby jogger city select double but they are £300+ second hand. New doesn't bear thinking about.... over £1k .

gunwalloe yes mine is on Thursday. Feeling excited and nervous in equal measure.

Thanks for the sling info diamond. DD really didn't get on all that well win slings and I found them uncomfortable, perhaps because I'm very short, so will definitely try a sling library to try and get it right this time.

Visited a friend who is 36 weeks yesterday and wanted to show me everything she'd bought in case she'd missed anything or anything was not worth keeping. It was weird the way it all came flooding back and suddenly the idea of a newborn again seemed very real. I'm hoping 2nd time round it will be much easier to relax and enjoy as everything won't be new. How did those expecting DC3 or more feel with DC2 compared to DC1 as a newborn?

I was wondering if anyone could give me advice on health & safety at work?

Im a nursery nurse and have been experiencing lower back at work, i work 7 and half hours on the nursey floor 3 days a week.

I think it mostly due to the fact that im having to sit on the childrens chair & desks, there is no adult height desks and chairs on the nursery floor at all!!

Last week the pain was so sore at the end of my shifts i could have cried! .,.

Any advice on how to approach this with my boss and what they should provide me with?

Goats I really don't feel pregnant either and forget that I am then she kicks and I remember

Captain im the same I will be glad when its done and hopefully everything is ok maybe I can then bond more with her and feel pregnant.

Im still in normal clothes and no sign of a bump or even needing maternity clothes any time soon.

*lower back pain

Goats I don't feel updiffed either its really different this time. I actually feel less tired now I'm pregnant than a few months ago as DH (legend that he is!) is dealing with any night wakings to let me rest. It might be your pals are just plain shattered after months of broken nights and didn't have the energy to walk? When we had bad patches sleepwise sometimes it was tough to do anything other than get thru the day and high five each other at bedtime .

My 20 week scan is tomorrow at 4! Really glad it iS tomorrow actually as the DH is training in Switzerland from Tuesday til Friday, which I'd completely forgotten about :-/

Yikes I definitely need to start making a to-buy list too! My mum and sister both had to have c-sections so I've never been aware of the tea tree/hazelnut oil in a jug scenario!!

Goats I've had meltdownish moments too. I'm pretty ditsy at the best of times so I worry I'll be a complete dope if I have someone else to be responsible for, not selfless enough, or fun enough - we all know those people who kids just flock to, who can connect as effortlessly with the shy retiring kids as they can play the clown with the outgoing kids.?...I'm not one of those people.

P.S. Hi Yellow! I'm just outside Glasgow :) Hi to the other newbies who I've missed, it's a fast moving thread this weekend!

Kirsti hellooo!

Its probably been being a gobshite but I have a teething 18 month old treating us to bad nights so too much time to post. Yaaawn. He's up with us now poor soul.

I'd also say longer term a rocking chair did us great for BF and settling night wakings though rocking him has failed to get him to sleep tonight .

We are looking at that pushchair me. I found pure lavender oil really soothing and nice to smell after I had a few stitches that wouldn't come out easily. Lovely in the bath! Struggling with constipation and heart burn today. The joys bring on the next 20 weeks quickly