Due October 2006 - part 4

[nowanearlyNicemum]

there we go - I did it.
just need for you all to find it now...

Hi,yes ask for full refund for massage,as it doesnt sound like she trained to massage pg women.I specialize in treating pg,and i went on several courses,women always lie on their side with cushion between knees and pillow supporting breasts and bump,failing that semi reclined or on a special bump support couch.
As for weiord dreams,get a kot of those,gave birth to a car last night,was cute but not what i was expecting.
to all ladies worried about breast feeding,phone Nct,you dont have to be a member,they will come out to you if you having problems,its free and they very helpful.

Thanks for all your good wishes - this all brings back so many memories of when my mum passed away I am finding it really difficult, and then feeling guilty as i'm not sure if i'm crying for the loss if FIL or Mum?

As for weird dreams - I think for dreams you actually have to sleep - is that right? - seems so long ago now, am feeling so utterly exhausted but so many things now going round in my head I keep waking up at stupid o'clock and only getting 3-4 hours sleep a night and then can't get back to sleep as my head is spinning. Plus now seem to be going down with a cold as am feeling so run down.

We have a date for the funeral now - 12th Oct - the day before due date - fantastic! Although OH did say last night not to worry if I did go into labour when the funeral was on as he would be with me not at the service - I just don;t want to have to put him in that position bless him though.

Unfortunately all the excitement I was feeling about the imminent arrival seems to have vanished now - oh well nothing we can do about it, just have to keep fingers crossed that everything else goes OK!

Well, my strange dreams sound pretty normal now - dreaming about people dropping the baby from a great height (luckily it bounced). Also dreamt that LO was blonde - v. unlikely as DH and I are dark.

Rumpel: already contemplating no. 2? Brave woman.

Justers: LOL at your DH, mine would have much the same reaction!

Have been getting a few BH, worrying as I can't feel the baby move for a while. No pattern so far as I can see.

Oh, and I'm 4/5 engaged but no other signs that baby might want to turn up soon

Gingeme: have a great weekend with your DSs. Hope the weather holds out.

jmc: glad you have a definite date. If this is your first, isn't it usual to be overdue anyway? Hope everything goes OK. Can you get some sleep in during the day to make up for your bad nights?

Thanks to all those with reassurance on Braxton Hicks front. My body doesn't feel different yet - I only know it's getting closer from the size of me and time slipping by. I expect I'll notice when the time comes.

Blimey Rumpel, I can't believe you're thinking about the second baby already. I think it's great though - just not brave enough myself. Friends are planning our second, but I think I'll wait and see what state this one leaves me in first.

OMG Milliee - it's a whole can of worms! We went through our finances when we found out we were expecting, which resulted in changing our mortgage and crossing our fingers. I'd suggest sitting down with DH and talking it through while you still have the chance. Don't forget you're a team and you shouldn't feel bad about needing what you've previously considered as 'his' money. You're earning it just as much as he is now. If you haven't already, you might think about setting up a joint account or getting him to transfer some cash to your account every month so you don't have to ask him every time you need a fiver. (We've done both and we discuss purchases for the baby, but not my own personal expenditure.) Sorry if this is a bit detailed, but I hope it gives you some ideas to start with. We've decided that I'll stay at home with the baby and then start some sort of work again when I feel ready. It'll be a struggle financially, but we're hoping we can keep our heads above water. I realise being in a position to make this decision is a privilege and for me, it's only because I'm having my first baby so close to 40. Any younger and I'd have had to go back to work too. (But not having children earlier wasn't through choice iyswim.)

Rianna, glad you're ok. that you had to pay at all for a massage that was completely unsuitable. You should complain to the salon and get a complete refund. It's just not on.

jmc, don't feel bad about being sad for your mum as well as FIL. It's bound to bring it all back. I lost my mum a couple of years ago too. It's tough being pg with no mummy around without other family members starting to drop off too.

To anyone who's made it this far, I apologise for the long post and I'll try really hard to keep it short in future (if I remember.)

aaah, 5 days to go. I could never be a fat lass Very much looking forward to getting my feet up for a few days!

Hi All - aren't Saturdays exciting? Remember when the weekend used to be about dressing up glam and going out on the pull, out for a meal, out dancing!? Oh - those were the days.

Rianna - defo write and complain to the salon. Sounds very much like the therapist was inexperienced and therefore should not have been attending to you. It is a lot of money and more to the point you were expecting a lovely relaxing treatment. Any salon worth its salt will offer you a complimentary treatment to apologise.

Millee - I am very lucky as I have given up work - I am on a 'career break' for the next 6 - 7 years as I want to spend the time bringing up LOs. I am fortunate enough that I could work part-time for some extra cash now and again if I wanted to due to the nature of my work. Which I will probably do, just to keep my hand in. I don't feel bad at all living off DH money! As far as I am concerned that is just the way it is - you can't do everything. Anyway we do the really hard and important job of growing babies and delivering them!! Also it is our careers that suffer long term due to this - so don't feel bad - just enjoy!

I always get weird dreams - last night I dreamt that a big lion, with a huge black mane, was going to eat me! Woke up all sweaty. I know they say that you need to be in REM to dream, however, I seem to do most of my dreaming in the semi-concious state between sleeping/waking and vice-versa.

I had to exit the house today as we had a plumber coming to fix the loo - it has been on the brink of collapse for ages and was very worried about it packing in when LO arrives, what with impending visitors/bleeding etc. All fixed now so I can relax.

I have been feeling very peculiar today - just not right- and my tummy keeps going rock hard and feeling 'twangs' really low down which are kind of making me suck my breath in. Could this be it? It is sooo hard to say isn't it? I hate waiting for anything - I am sooo impatient. Am desperate to get baby out and in my arms - yet terrified as well!

LONG POST - SORRY!

LOL at all the weird dreams - I had one a couple of weeks ago where I gave birth on a coach and then lost the baby. And just had another where I had a show but it was an apple. Totally bizarre...

DH on nights tonight...am hoping baby doesn't arrive although my big sis is on standby to come with me and she would be brill so wouldn't be all bad. My mum hoping she doesn't have to get out of bed as she is running the great north run tomorrow. She's done it many many times before so you'd think the possible arrival of a grandchild would be more important but...grrrrr...

Rumpel - sounds very exciting...maybe this is it?!

Any further signs, Rumpel? Certainly sounds hopeful.

Re finances, I'm on full pay for 3 months then statutory for another 3 (i.e. not much at all). DH has just started working freelance, so income a bit variable. I'm sure we can manage the basic stuff, as our mortgage isn't too high, but disposable income will be more tricky. Then we'll need to move house next year, so will need savings for that.

We're moving from me partly supporting DH (when he first gave up work) so him supporting me (when the salary runs out) so am not feeling guilty about that!

Re Finances - I son;t know if I am just a bit over organised, but I worked out the costings for a whole load of different scenarios a couple of years ago when we bought our new house -I wanted to make sure taht when we did start a family there would be enought money to carry on living some sort of normal life without having to live off beans on toast! So far so good and we have managed to save up some money before the birth, so that I can have the six months off with SSP, and then (as our situation will have changed by then in view of recent events) so it may be possible to take the other 6 months unpaid - again though this is only possible as we have left it relatively late to have LO (I am 33) so we fortunately had a fairly sound financial base to start from - having said all that, would ideally like two children and haven't even thought of the financial implications of that!

Is anyone else getting panicky about baby's movements? I have been for the last couple of days. i dont keep a sheet or anything as I always forget but then I get to about 3 in the afternoon and have to try and remember. I'm sure I'm getting 10 moves a day but some of them are quite subtle and I only notice if I'm resting. I seem to get one day of little moves then the next day could be loads of big moves.

Does this sound normal?

hiya -

hope all ok, just a quick up date

I spent one night in hospital, was the worst experience ever, I discharged myself first thing in the morning, the staff were rude and dismissive and I hated it!

Any way, since being home, my BP has gone back down to normal, and no other pre eclampsia symptoms to I'm now fighting to get signed back to MW led care so I can have baby at home or at local birthing unit rather than Ipswich Hospital.

My sister had her baby at 6am Friday morning, a baby girl weighing 9 pound 1, I'm so proud of her, she got to 6cm with no pain relief, yay she's really given me hope.

Hope all ok... not long now

Message withdrawn

is anyone due tmrw ?? as its gonna be my dd's 2nd bday tmrw

Good luck to u all xx

Emzickle - glad you are feeling better. Sorry for my repeated postings last night - my computer started to do funny things so I kept pressing post ... and you saw the results!!!!

I go to 9/10ths of wage as soon as mat leave starts, then half pay + smp, then for last chunk just smp. We are both in our 30's but have come from previous marriages, and dh has a son from his so we pay out a lot for him, and are almost like a young couple starting out again, so are knackered financially really. We do laugh about where we would both be had we stayed with out previous partners ... rich, but very unhappy, I would probably have been in a similar situation to Saka too, so glad I got out when I did!

Oh the price we pay for falling in love and chosing the person over the material things! I am desperately praying that something will turn up to enable me to stay off for the full paid 6 months - we will have to wait and see.

Been out at mums all day and had a c**p return, someone has smashed the passenger side window in of dh car - so got to find the money for that on top now! Nothing was taken, but does make you wonder why people do these things.

How utterly crap girlygale...hope you get it sorted quickly

Milliee it is so true what you say about mothers being invisible. It doesn't matter what you've done before/how well qualified you are - you could be a flipping nobel prize winner but walk around the shops with a buggy and people assume you have no brain and no worth. Or perhaps thats just cos I look so young and scruffy the whole time?! Perhaps should make more of an effort to be 'yummy mummy' type...hmmm...can't see it happening!

Biglips - I am due tomorrow (by hospital dates) SCARY!!! I'm sure its going to end up being induced though so not really getting my hopes up.
Hope your DD's birthday goes well.

Re baby movements - I am the same, have days where doesn't move much and days where won't stay still. I find that if not much movement having a cold drink and lying down for half an hour often get it shifting about again. At this stage in PG normal to not feel big movements I think as baby so squashed up in there, less room to get a good force behind the kicks - although it can still jam its bottom and heels up into my rib cage!

jmcmugwump really sorry to hear about your FIL. Hope you get through it all OK and you are both bearing up OK.

re finances, before DD came along we were rubbish with money-spent it all on going out constantly, holidays abroad, eating out, buying expensive presents and didn't at all appreciate that we had a great disposable income. Got a real shock financially when I left job in the city to do a local job three days a week earning a fraction of what I used to. However, we have sort of adjusted to being constantly skint, so am hoping this time around it will not be such a shock. And of course, we are far happier now despite the lack of money. If at all possible I am taking the full year off though I only get statutory maternity pay.

Milliee I remember shortly after DD was born, going to a wedding and feeling that people were looking down on me because I was 'just' a mother and not working. MInd you, I was probably a tad paranoid as it is a weird feeling when you have been used to your earning power and it suddenly isn't there.

Sallyrosie I think I will end up being induced again too. Need some positive thinking.

Re worrying about movements, I ended up crying on the midwife on Friday after my BP check, so she sent me to the hospital to be monitored. The baby was hyperactive when we got there rather than not moving at all, but I was glad we went anyway, so you can always get checked if you are worried.

As for bad dreams, I have had some horrors that I won't go on about on here. It isn't really rocket science to realise they are all connected to losing the baby last year. I just want the baby here, now, alive. I can't bear the thought of another three weeks of pregnant worry.

emzickle hope the BP stays down
girlygale-sorry to hear about the car

hi ladies,

quick panic: just got back from my morning trot round the park to find I've bled a bit (just a little bit, very very watery, sorry for TMI).. Does anyone know what this could mean? I'm not due for another 12 days..

It's not a show unless it's an actual jellyish mass, is it?

I haven't been getting lots of movements although drinking a very cold drink usually starts it off if I get worried - I did feel a foot appearing under my left boob the other day which was a bit weird, but the braxton hicks seem to be a lot more frequent now - it's just a waiting game now, but i just have a gut feeling it will be in the next week - at least I have everything sorted here for the baby - the only outstanding issues are my bikini line and a pedicure, but that shouldn't be too much stress to sort out.

OH's family are now starting to take some of the pressure off us re the arrangements for the funeral (about time) i did have a bit of a pop at his brother the other night when he told us we were having his sister for the weekend as he wanted time with his girlfriend - selfish little git - I did have to quite forcefully point out I was pregnant and constant house guests was too much for me to cope with - I think he was a bit taken aback, but quite frankly I don't see why we should have to do everything especially with a baby on the way.

On a lighter note I did tell my Dad that he might have to be on standby to take me to the hospital on the day of the funeral - anyone would think I had asked him to deliver the baby in the back of his car from his reaction - so I have had to assure him that he will not be required to perform birth partner functions!! (He is the sort of chap who thinks that casualty should have a warning triangle come up in the bottom of the screen if there are any scenes involving blood/scalpels/needles )

Majormoo: the waiting is awful, isn't it? Sometimes I feel like I'm just waiting for something to go wrong. Hang on in there. I suppose bad dreams (more for me last night) are a relatively sane way of working through all our fears. That's what I tell myself when I'm awake and upset at 3 in the morning, anyway.

Hope you're feeling better today, Girlygale. What a nasty thing to happen.

Glad to hear your out of hospital Emzickle, and good luck with the mw.

Milliee: I'm getting worried about the baby as well (until I get a substantial boot in the ribs). I think it's because it has been so active most of the way through, so I'm really noticing the difference now. Keep telling myself that it's normal and there's no need to worry as long as the baby is moving regularly through the day (and it is).

October is finally here: waiting to hear of some more babies putting in an appearance...

Gemmitygem: could you contact your mw/doctor for reassurance (not sure what the arrangements are now you're in Belgium). On my notes, it says to contact the ward if you have any bleeding. Might be a show, but I have no idea - if so, this can happen weeks before you go into labour. Worth checking out, anyway.

gemmitygem-does sound like a show though I am no expert. The jelly thing would be the mucus plug. Perhaps as swizzler says maybe call just to check. Sure the hospital won't mind. Exciting-could be an October baby about to make an appearance (although as we know can be quite a while between the show and labour)

My DH has taken DD to the aquarium so I have a quiet couple of hours to look at the internet and repack my hospital bag!!

no jelly, just some pinkish blood (ew!)...

will wait a bit and see what happens (DH arriving from Kazakhstan in about 2 hours)...

Yes gg it sounds very much like your show. As long as the blood isnt bright red or of any substantial amount thats usualy what it looks like. You wont always see the jelly part either. Your mw should have told you your baby can come a fortnight either side of your due date but the show usualy comes up to a fortnight before hand too. Saying that mine came about 4 days before with ds3 so good luck to you. Sounds like babys holding on till Daddy comes home though
Yes babys moving loads one day and slow another. Have to remember though its got alot less room to move about now. Went swimming yesterday. Was so lovely to feel weightless for an hour or so. Got alot of stares and smiles off other Mums though. Think they were all worried Id come for my water birth! Ha imagine that
Looking forward to Tuesday. Never been to a Starbucks before. Hope its yummy!

Good afternoon every1,

I'm really fed up with the wait- wondering if every twinge is it! Its nice now we have come into October and to think that most of our babes will start their arrivals soon.

On the show thing-I just had to phone labour ward because I had a massive show- really horrid-TMI(for the second time in 4 days) the midwife said people don't realise you can have two shows. She said to call back if it became bleeding or watery.I was worried about calling the delivery suite but I don't think they mind-so if anyone is worried about anything just call them.

Going to try a long walk now with OH. Hope it gets things moving.