November 2014 Thread 3- Counting towards the second trimester!

[barmybunting]

Hi everyone,

A new thread for us chatty bunch due in November. Could someone repost the stats? I'm on my phone so can't do it. Thank you!

januaryjump thanks for your thoughts on the birthing centre - I am provisionally booked in as I'm a low risk PG so far. But going on what you said it does sound like a good option and the labour ward is close by in case of any problems. I feel the same as you, as long as mum and baby are OK every woman has to choose the best for herself.

To be honest I didn't have any idea about the options, only one close friend has a baby as she had a high risk PG which ended in emergency caesarean so I don't really have much to go on. Must do more research

A nugget in there with beating heart. I burst into tears when i saw it.
Further on than thought - 12.5 weeks with EDD 25th oct. Not sure how as would have got pg before last period.

14 days til results of nuchal. Private scans and tests in 2 weeks so wont be telling anyone for a while yet.
home birthing - got all dates / times of my next 3 scans today and have spoken to home birthing team. With DD1 did all labouring at home and coped great with no pain relief so want to try that option. Will have a bit of a battle due to age but prepared for that and have doula to support me too.

Good luck to all waiting for scans.

I'm hoping for a birth centre. It's my first so I'm not confident enough to do it at home but I definitely do NOT want a labour ward if I could help it. In nogey's position I would probably opt for the home birth.

That's brilliant weeonion, happy scan news :).

amylou what a shame about everyone finding out at school so early. I can totally understand your worries there. You will be glad to get to your 12 week scan after that I imagine.

caravela I would probably tell your current boss when you are ready, and let him/her tell your new boss in their handover so it's done and you don't need to worry about it.

I've just phoned the teaching agency I am covering this maternity post through to tell them I am pregnant before I tell the school next week. The girl who deals with the school I am at was on holiday, so I had to tell someone else who asked me not to tell the school until Wednesday so they can look at plans on the Tuesday. I wish I had just been able to tell the girl I wanted to speak to as I just want to get it out of the way with the school next week, but oh well! Now I'm only hoping they don't decide to end my contract with them sooner than I want them too...

So I had my 12 week scan at 8+5 due to my funny dates due to PCOS. All looked good and I'm going back in at 13 weeks on 13 May.
Also met my lovely midwife and I can go to appointments with her only 10 mins walk away.
Also a couple of friends will have their babies around the same time as me which is brilliant.
I'm still really struggling with sciatica but the working from home is helping and I'm seeing my phsyio today. It's just so frustrating I can't take much for it and keep on having to make excuses for this at work!

Hurray for a morning of good scans! Delightful news.

Ooh good news about scans!

there's a midwife lead unit attached to my hospital nextish to the labour ward. I think I want to go there. But you can't have an epidural and while previously I was sure I didn't want one, it seems naive to decide I won't at the time when this is my first. on the bright side it's not like I'd be at risk of not getting emergency medical care immediately if needed.

Hi All, have had two days off and pictured myself wafting serenely around the shops checking out maternity clothes and doing lots of much delayed housework.

But instead yesterday I had an unexpected stupid argument with a family member who basically said I wasn't there for them enough at the mo (ignoring the fact I'm working 70 hours a week and am sick as a dog) and it triggered a terrible avalanche of hormonal weeping.

Tearfully decided I wouldnt let it ruin my day, but when I went into New Look to look at maternity stuff I wanted to bawl my eyes out again, full certain that cos I was apparently such a horrible person no sooner would I buy something than i'd lose the baby.

Thank god DH had a day off too, as he was there when I walked in the door with my unspent money crumpled in my palm sobbing my heart out. He was lovely and told me I was a good person who deserved to have a baby, and everything was ok, and i didn't have to buy anything i didn't want to, and he'd take care of me, and to remember that him, me & baby were the most important family, and everyone else would just have to look out for themselves. He was amazing. He hadn't seen me cry in three years!

So am showering him with affection ever since. Even today I feel flattened, headaches and worn out and whilst he's helped me rally a bit, i'm still hugely insecure about the pregnancy. So much for my two days off!

Have decided not to buy anything until 17 weeks, as i'm still haunted by my colleagues curse warning that she lost her first at 16 weeks. No wonder I'm a basket case!

I didn't buy anything first time round for ages - partly as didn't need to for months but mostly due to outright paranoia, so don't worry!

On the telling employers front, last time I told colleagues at about 16 weeks but swore to secrecy and didn't tell my bosses till 20+ weeks as I suspected being old and pretty chauvinistic types in a small practice they'd not cope well. As it turned out, within 3 weeks of my telling them they suspended me without a reason and thus began a jolly battle that ended with solicitors! -And a nice cheque, but I'd rather have skipped the stress
They have now gone into voluntary redundancy. [evil emoticon]

Having said that, I think most employers are a damn sight more enlightened these days, and my boss now is being awesome about it... ahem, is actually me

Oh Anna, that sounds like a tough day. That family member sounds very selfish! It's nice to have a DH who is so supportive though. Try not to worry about jinxing things, whatever happens is in no way related to what you buy or don't buy. And don't let the colleague's story scare you, these things are so rare and once you've had that 12 week scan you can have faith that you'll end up with a lovely baby.

We have a birth centre in the region, but it's over 10 miles away. I don't think that I would want to travel that far whilst being in labour! My mom had all her kids at home, and my brother and sister were just watching the telly while I was being born. It does sound nice not to have to go to hospital but I would want doctors nearby just in case...

weeonion you mentioned a DVD, that is so cool you're in it. Is everyone supposed to get it? I got this stupid Emma's diary thing. I really hate it and only read a few pages. I mean, the diary starts with 'OMG I'm pregnant!'. Cringe! And the rest is condescending crap ('how to feel sexy in pregnancy') or ads ('buy a dishwasher so you can spend more time with your baby' ). I'm quite shocked the NHS is handing out this BS. I was expecting something more informative. I guess they need to make some money though.

blamber I couldn't agree more!! 1st pregnancy and was so excited to read all the material crap they give you and ended up throwing it in the bin shouting 'they might as well call it 'Topsy and Tim are having a baby'' - what a pile of tosh.

Has anyone's nausea got worse as the weeks go on?

10+1 today, and threw up for the first time this morning. Have managed to keep everything else down today, so I don't think it's a bug, but I think I'll be throwing up again later.

my nausea is definitely awful today -.-

Anna that's awful - do they realise you're pregnant or are they just horrible? If they don't then try not to take it to heart I too am fed up of people judging me for things when they don't know that it's cos I'm pregnant. like why I've become house bound :p

Oh Anna, take care and enjoy some time to yourself, people often just don't think and don't realise how hurtful they're being, enjoy your pregnancy (and stick it out through the tiredness and sickness!), like your DH said it's about you three more than anyone else.

blamber Haha! Yes I did the same first time, didn't get Emma's Diary but did get tons of Bounty rubbish and Mother & Baby magazines kept appearing in the post None of it was useful. And I wish I could get a dishwasher! No space to stick one (despite much help on Good Housekeeping to try and fit one on the counter ).

I got a DVD from the hospital which gives you an overview of the process there, it came with my appointment letters. At booking in they gave me a CD-ROM, haven't looked at it yet but I think it's the same as last time, gives a bit more detail on antenatal and postpartum stuff. They also gave me a print out on up to date guidance, like vitamins to take and safe/unsafe foods. MW told me to listen to NHS Choices and no one else online I think sometimes they get a bit tired of people reading advice from different countries and worrying they're doing something wrong here.

Lol at "Topsy and Tim are having a baby"

That should totally have been the headlines about the 12 year old who has just had a baby, I might have read more of it then

I got a load of free samples in my Bounty bag and some magazines that were just adverts so I chucked them away. I'm quite capable of turning this pregnancy into a giant retail opportunity without extra suggestions!

Annarose - sorry you had a grim time from relative. Its even tougher to cope with these things when hormones are all over place but yr dp sounds lovely.

Blamber - i think everyone gets a copy of the dvd around 20 weeks but in Scotland they give it out early with other bumpf. I wonder if you will spot which one i am ;-)
We got asked to be in it not because we sailed through breastfeeding but because i had alot of problems. I look back and remember that my boobs and nipples seemed to become public property for a while with so many people woman handling them...
I defiently want to try it again though..

Thankfully no Emma's story here - we get Ready Steady Baby.

Just checking in - hi all.

weeonion How old are you? I'm 41 and have been told if no other risk factors then home birth not a prob (had one with DD five years ago). Obviously good to have an open mind, but if you decide that's what you want then do persist - I recommend it as long as it's what you feel comfortable with.

elliekins - just wanted to say, in case it helps put your mind at rest, after two hours pushing with fairly large (for me) DD (8lb 4) the mw said she was going to have to give me an episiotomy as I wasn't tearing naturally. I can honestly say it was totally untraumatic - they numb the area and there was so much going on down there I barely noticed, just a bit of a burny feeling - and DD popped out after a few more pushes. She stitched me up (took half an hour, but also with local anasthaetic, and I was lying on the sofa holding DD) and, again, I know it sounds horrible but I can honestly say it wasn't that bad. It healed really well and I have never had any trouble with scarring. I know not everyone has such a good story, and she was obviously quite skilled, but just wanted to say it doesn't have to be awful.

Oh Anna for you. But your DH sounds lovely. People say very stupid things, and it's horrible when you're already feeling so vulnerable. Sod 'em! Also, to add to blambers comments, with later losses, it is usually the case that at earlier scans there are some indications that all is not well, so if everything looks perfect at 12 weeks, it is even more unlikely that all will not be OK. So hard to relax, though, I know. I had a loss before DD and it was very up and down all the way through emotionally.

Had hospital nuchal scan yesterday, although she didn't take official measurements as she said I was better off passing on the results from the Fetal Medicine Centre when I have the NT scan there next week (to go with my Harmony results). Something to do with hospital rules and the way that they record information. However, she was very sweet and wanted to reassure me so she did say quite clearly that the NT looked normal and all was well, even though she wasn't going to record the measurement, which was lovely to hear.

january - we moved DS into this bed and he likes it but probably would happily have stayed in his cot if we let him. Had to bite the bullet some time though!

utopian - that's interesting you had that experience with your former employer. So did I - the same time I announced at 14 weeks I was called into director's office and told my role 'wasn't working out'. First I'd heard of it. Totally appalling horrible people but I got a solicitor and a settlement just as you did. Would have preferred to do without all the stress too though, as you say! Don't know why people have to be such pricks. Am pleased to hear of others' employers being considerate about them so it's not all unprofessionalism out there...

I would like a Dvd :p

I agree emmas diary is awful... almost as bad as cherry has a baby.

There are 2 things I'm certain of for my birth, I do not want to push lying on my back and I want to delay cord clamping until it has stopped pulsing!

alita - I definitely didn't want to push lying on my back with DD, but after a long pushing stage (during which I must have ended up in every position known to (wo)man - and probably some hitherto unknown) funnily enough I felt most comfortable not actually lying, but certainly in quite a conventional half-sitting, half-lying position (sitting room floor with my back propped against the sofa). Never say never .

it's the increased chance of tears on your back and dp says it looks like I'm going to tear badly anyway! I want to avoid it all costs :p

alita - why would your dp say it looks like you're going to tear badly? Not sure how one would know that...

Hi all, I've been waiting till my scan to join a group I thought I was due 30th October but turns out when I went for my scan yesterday they put me at 7th November which makes me 10+6 at the moment. I've got another scan in a couple of weeks as baby wasn't big enough to do checks and they'll confirm due date then. So I hope I can join you all for the highs & lows of the months to come

welcome mummyv

Alita - really no idea how your dp would know you will tear badly!!??

make the gagging stop, make it stop, make it stop