January's new May thread

[MrsFooCough]

All of us May mummies are BACK like the Terminator only less deadly (unless preggo rage strikes and we're within waddling distance of sharp things)

Stats page

Baby size chart

Have a , some , and TELL US EVERYTHING ~listening intently~

Unless I needed them for child care I would absolutely not tell ANYONE I was in labour. A) it would put an awful amount of pressure on my thinking people knew I was mooing and doing about. B) if it was my parents they'd do nothing but worry until I phoned and I like to have a shower and a good feed before we face the real world again.

God in law families are an absolute nightmare! Spoke to the doc and he was fine- signed me off until the. 10th and I go on mat leave on the 14th! Quite a nice feeling but I need to tie up loose ends at work etc. But he thinks it's pelvic girdle pain and I will need to get a pelvic girdle belt! Fun times.

Ah Nanny wish i was that close to mat leave! Hope the rest helps ease the pain.

Xav I think that's what I'd like ot do except I think my parents would be disappointed that we hadn't told them. My DM has already commented that 'she'll be sitting outside the room waiting for the announcement that the baby has arrived'- just need to work out how to suggest thats not the best idea!

Got pretty much everything sorted now I think, I seem to have hit a bit of a panic for sorting everything now I'm 24 weeks (not sure where that's come from!)

My morning sickness seems to have reared it's ugly head again for some reason, and not just in the morning either- thought I'd seen the back of it! ho hum.

Regarding labour and who's allowed to be there/know about it, we live with my parents anyway (big big house though) so my mum will probably know before my MIL does. MIL is welcome to come down as soon as she likes but if she even thinks about bringing DH's stepdad I'll kill her. Stepdad is a complete DICK. He'll interfere and stick his nose in and I think I will just actually scream at him. Non-stop. Also I'm going to a labour ward, so only DH is allowed into the delivery room, which makes everything so much easier so basically, MIL lives in the West Mids, will take at least 4hrs to get here (and we're not telling her until I'm in late-stage labour) so she'll be staying for a while once Bean and I are home. But my parents are here and involved already anyway! And luckily that's fine with DH

Baby has been quite quiet again today. I've only had about 2 periods of movement today, interspersed with hours of nothing. This isn't normal. Usually he kicks all the livelong day. Midwife said to call the fetal health dept this evening if no change.

I'm 25+3 today. Has anyone else had a change in movements, and if so, did you go get it checked? I don't want to make a fuss over nothing as I have had over 10 movements today, but they were all in a five minute period. Nothing before or since. I feel really worried. (I've been drinking coke, eating haribo, poking him etc to no avail)

OH's uncle's funeral date has been announced, at the same time as my 28 week midwife appointment. It's going to be really difficult to reschedule and I'm really not sure I want to go.

Dobe I'm 26+5 and I've found that movement has been pretty consistent and has generally got more frequent and stronger as the weeks have gone on.

Have you tried drinking your cold fizzy drink and lying on your left side? If you google it, there are some guidelines about what you should expect to feel, and when you should get checked out.

If it's playing on your mind I would give that a go now and if you wait the 1 hour/2 hours they suggest with no movement then contact the midwife again. I'm sure it'll be fine, but if it's playing on your mind it's best to get checked out.

Re: labour, I can imagine being quite precious over our baby's first few hours and just wanting to spend time with him with DH. I went to see my niece within 3 hours of her being born as my sister wanted me to visit the hospital and see her. But I have images of wanting the baby to my (and DH's) self for the first day or two. Mentioned that the DH who said his mum would be crawling the walls and desperate to meet her first grandson, so I might have to relent and offer short visits.

dobe I've had 12 hours without movements and went to antenatal day unit, they checked me over and said I did right thing. I'd do what the midwife said :)

Moomin I would take my lead from OH. If he wants you there I would go.

I can't really think of anything that I wouldn't reschedule to support my DH at a funeral. As you are his support system.

It might be that he wants to go on his own, but if it's looking like he wants you be there I would reschedule midwife appointment for any other time.

I don't know if/when I can reschedule though, she's only in two days a week and both are full for next week, and I need blood pressure checks every two weeks. I feel like he thinks he wants me there but in reality we won't be anywhere near each other for the service, I'll have to be at the back, so it probably wouldn't be any comfort to him anyway.

Oh Moomin it's been such a difficult time for you and your OH. I second what impatiently has said, you have to support your OH in whatever way he needs at the moment.

Hugs

Moomin could you maybe make an appointment with the practice nurse for your blood pressure check that week and call into the midwife the week after?

I'm going to have to reschedule my 28 week appointment too as I'm working away in London (based in Newcastle) the day before and after my midwife appointment and I really don't want to do 12 hours of train travel that week. My midwife said I can come and see her at another practice to my usual one, she is only based at my practice one day a week, but visits other local practices the rest of the time. Not sure if it would be the same in your local area?

Maybe have a chat with OH, I'm just thinking that in his position I would really want my partner there, even if we didn't sit together, just so I knew they were there for me. But your OH may feel that as you won't be together much on the day he wouldn't mind you not being there. If you missed the funeral would you be still able to attend the wake/anything they were doing afterwards? That could be another solution?

moomin I think most midwives are able to reschedule things, I have two midwives because they job share, so I'm sure you could see another one if your regular one can't reschedule to see you herself? It doesn't hurt to ask, we had to reschedule one of my early ones because of my grandpa's funeral and they were very understanding.
Why wouldn't you be sitting with your OH? I'm confused. My DH sat next to me at the funeral, I wasn't next to my grandma/mum/aunt but just behind them. It seems a bit odd that they'd make you sit far away? Hope you're doing ok and that OH's mum and sister have been civil to you xxx

Re. Labour. I don't even want my dp in the room for the final bit! This may change, but I'm pretty sure he can just wait outside! Definitely no parents or pils!! Might not even tell them I'm in labour unless it looks like we'll be in hospital a long time and then they might wonder why we aren't answering the phone ... But don't want them to come. Just want to come home and then they can come over and visit (with food!)

Hope all those who are suffering feel better soon

Dobe any movements yet? Could be going through a growth spurt and sleeping more than usual? I don't have routine movements yet but sugar and lying down usually help if I'm worried. Do phone mw if you're worried

moomin sorry you're having such a hard time but I echo impatiently, isean and mrsfoo you should be there for your OH... you should be able to get a nurse at your GP practice to do a bp check pretty much anytime and hopefully can reschedule the MW for the following week.

I hope you make it work

dobe hope some fizzy drinks helps bean get going but if you're worried go and get a check straight away

thinking about it I haven't felt much since this morning but he does seem to only become animated when I lie down - maybe a good excuse for a little snooze.......

sorry, should sounds too prescriptive - it would be nice if you COULD be there is probably more suitable! xx

dobe are you at home? All of my babies have woken up and had a good wriggle and kick about when I have a hot bath.

moomin you need to speak to your OH. GP or a nurse at surgery can take your BP etc and pop it on your notes.

I've drank coke and cold water but he's still being very quiet. I had some hiccups a while ago but nothing else. It's still not right - I'm going to call fetal health and get checked out. I googled (I know, bad idea) and it said vastly reduced movements can mean low fluid or something wrong with the placenta or the baby is sick or something. I can't have another day of worrying all day, barely can concentrate!

Ooh dobe I'm with mumof2 - hot bath and a bit of Daft Punk on the good speaker system usually gets Bean moving! DH was a house DJ, gigging and radio presenting, until he got a Grown Up Job in computers I think we have a mini raver in this here bump!

definately better to get checked than sit there worrying dobe- let us know all is ok when you get back and good luck!

mumof2 how come you stopped aiming for 4 may I ask?

Definitely get it checked out Dobe. I read somewhere that hiccoughs don't count as movement so if it doesn't feel right then then trust your judgement.

I'm sure you'll come back later to tell us baby was having a lazy day, it in a funny position so you didn't feel much, but you won't be able to relax until you know that everything is ok.

Good luck and let us know how things go.

Managed to reschedule midwife thankfully!

He'll be with his parents and sister (and probably his sister's husband, because they're married) near the front, whereas I'd probably be asked to sit near the back, but that's better for me as I've been struggling in any crowded/confined spaces lately, and this church in question is tiny.
So I've said that I'll stand outside (he reckons they'll do what they did for his granddad's funeral at the same church which was to set up a PA system), or in the car if it's cold, and join them for the actual burial, but we came to a kind of compromise. I told OH that he'd only worry if I had to get up and leave to be sick halfway through, which seems likely just lately, and he knew that was right, but at the same time I know that I'd want someone to be there for me if the tables were turned. So I'll be going, but waiting outside. Not sure about plans for a wake or anything like that, could just be service and burial.

Thanks everyone. More than anything I was worried about causing trouble/worrying OH if I had to step outside, and he understands now, and I understand that he just wants to know I'm there.

Glad you've got it sorted so you are both happy with the arrangements Moomin.

nanny do you remeber when I went into a&e for a prolapse? I was admitted and given a catheter as I couldn't pass urine. They thought I was going to lose the baby as it looked like my uterus had prolapsed. They still couldn't agree on whether it was my uterus or my bladder or both that prolapsed but either way it wasn't pretty. I've since been extremely limited as to what I'm allowed to do, I cant even bring a load of washing down the stairs ffs as they said no lifting.
Long story short my OH was petrified for me and baby and pretty much begged me not to have any more babies after this one. Its something my brain agreed to but not my heart. I always wanted to have 4 children and be a surrogate after I had finished having my own. I'm ok about stopping at three as I should count my blessings, but I am devastated that I can't be a surrogate now. Will probably end up donating my eggs before I get sterilised though.