Martians 2014, thread 11. KEGELS!

[LyraSilvertongue]

Shiny new thread, ladies :)

And I agree with Pain about co-sleeping. We put DD1 in another room early on and I used to go through and sit in a chair to feed her which wasn't too arduous as she slept through so early but it would have been a complete nightmare doing that with DD2! Was so much easier being able to just feed her in bed and it meant much less sleep disturbance.

Both my ff boys fed 3 hourly through the day. Ds1 had a dream feed at 10ish and it was the biggest feed he'd take all day. He was an awful feeder and projectile vomitted at least once a day so I kept it going because at least I knew he was getting one good feed. Ds2 would take it but didn't need it so we soon dropped it cos it meant one of us had to stay up to give it. he would wake around 5 for milk right until he was almost 2!!!

Pain, with DD2 at what age did you stop co-sleeping and move her to her own room?

With DD1 she was in her own room by 4 months - courtesy of the bloody 'manuals' (and other mums I was hanging out with at the time) who all made me feel that if my child wasn't sleeping through the night in her own room by that age I was doing something wrong. Chucked all such manuals in the bin 2nd time around and trusted my instincts. Co-slept and BF on demand and a had a lovely time! Would that approach have worked equally well with DD1?? I guess I'll never know. Maybe DD2 was just a chilled baby and I got lucky. (Oh no - does that mean this time it's my turn to have a colicky baby that won't sleep???)

BWP, that sounds awful, being too busy with other kids to feed the baby! No wonder it ate right through the night

I stopped BF when she was around 12/13 months as she went onto normal milk from a beaker (never bothered with expensive formula) so it must have been around that time. Actually we didn't move her to her own room at that point as we didn't want her to wake DD1 so we left her in our room and me and DH slept on the sofa bed for a few weeks til she got used to the idea of being in a room on her own. Then we put her in with her big sis and they shared a king-size bed for ages before we finally got them into bunk beds this year. Having kids share a bed is very sweet - we'd often see them sleeping whilst holding hands . Sometimes I wish we'd kept the big bed and just shoved baby 3 in there with them next year!

CoolHand, linky to your pretty dress for the wedding?

Had cereal for tea in the end. Too many biscuits this afternoon

Had a Eureaka (sp?) moment and worked out how to bookmark threads.

May actually keep up with the threads now

Although I feel throughly out of the loop.

Its been interesting reading all the posts about how you plan to parent your babies e.g GF/ff/bf/ etc.

To be honest, this time round I just plan not to be riddled with horrendous PND.

Pram it's a little tiny shop that once a month does three chocolate and wine combinations for tasting. They're always amazing but this time it was just sips of the wine for me. The best one this time was a dark chocolate with orange combined with a red wine that had 'hints of plum and cherry'. Cue lots of silly wine tasting impressions... But it tasted like Christmas.

I'm intrigued by all the feeding routine talk. I'm normally super-factual and plan ahead, but I have this crazy idea that I can just play it by ear. Glad you ladies are here to discuss all the options.

That sounds amazing baking!

DH has got manflu a cold and has woken me up while faffing around and now I'm wide awake. I guess car shopping is out the window for today then!

I'm so impressed people are thinking about sleep patterns already! I have only just got used to the idea of being pregnant, I've not even thought about baby coming out yet and what to do with it afterwards! I was just going to wing it and see if DH had any ideas.

I've always fed my babies on demand and let them sleep on me until about 6 months. Ds shared my room for a year and dd for 7 months. This baby will be in with us for about a year too. I don't have any hard and fast rules, I just try to do whatever is easiest for us all.

It's fairly easy to see a feeding and sleeping pattern emerging after the first few months and even more evident once they start weaning onto solids. This means we can work to a loose routine, I know vaguely when they will be hungry and when they will need to sleep. I had quite a strict routine with ds, as he was my first and I had no other children's needs to cater to. Dd was a bit more relaxed as I carried on taking ds out and things so dd slept where she was. I imagine it will be similar this time. I'm just going to go with it and see what happens and try not to lose my shit.

I bf my 1st 2. Didn't move them out of my room or try for any routines till 6 months. I always feel you're fighting a loosing battle if you try to impose routine too early so try to go with the flow! However I will be going back to work a bit earlier this time :( :( so may feel like getting routines set up earlier. We will see. I think just try to enjoy and not go mad ;)

Mummypig same here. The more children I have the less I've even thought about a routine etc - with school runs etc the new one will just have to fit in! DC3 will be in with us for at least 6 months, for convenience and also in line with SIDS advice.

pain they held hands when sleeping!! That's so lovely!

floaty I hope you're not struck with PND again but if you are you'll be much better equipped to recognise the early signs and deal with it. That happened to my friend with DC2 and as she could tell it was coming she was able to get some breastfeeding friendly medication and the PND did not intrude on her experience in anything like the same way it did first time x

There's no way I can keep up with this thread anymore! You're all so chatty. I will do my best though. Hope you all have good wknds

Wonder how much mat leave will you have this time?

I bf all 3 of mine, the boys till 18 months, and DD till she was 3(went for the easy life!!) and none of them would dream-feed. I tried a few times, but I just ended up with a half-awake grumpy baby who was too tired to feed, but too awake to snuggle down and go back to sleep
I had much more of a routine with the boys - like others have said, I didn't have other DCs to fit around - whereas DD had to just go with the flow and got fed whenever she needed it.
That said, they were all up just as much at night for the first year, so the routine (or lack of it) didn't seem to make a jot of difference.

In regards to the scan I will be having some very firm words with my midwife on Monday. If it is the stand in again I wont let her touch me. She mucked up taking blood (forgot to loosen the arm band for the first one so couldnt get much blood out then wiggled the needle as if to get more. Then tried on the other arm and never put much pressure on it before slapping on a plaster. Got home, blood had soaked through the plaster and gone down my arm before clotting.) I was briskly shrugged off when I explained that I have not been in contact with my mother since I was 8 so offered details from my mums sister and the OH's mum and how their pregnancy went (they don't matter at all). The emergency scan stuff I was supposed to show to her she just asked why she was supposed to see this then just stuck it in my notes. There was some other stuff but this post would then go on for ever.

The OH's mum was a nurse in the nhs for years, she was the one who told me where to call, which part of the hospital to be be put through to and what to say to get the scan. She is incredibly angry. Especially as there was a pregnancy related tragedy this year. That persons midwife and consultant asked that this be taken in to account if any of the OH's immediate family or their partners got pregnant as a precaution (this was also just waved aside by the person I saw).

I am just really scared and I just want to make sure my baby is ok, this wasn't planned but this baby is very wanted.

Pirates- if I get a big credit card I'm hoping to push it to 5 months

panto that is awful treatment. Definitely express all that on Monday . Make sure you speak to someone senior. Poor you.

Panto I'm for you

That's horrible treatment panto sorry you had to experience that.

Panto that's disgraceful! I really hope your hcps get their acts together and the rest of your antenatal care goes without a hitch.

Thanks for your kind words Piratesmam.
PND was terrible. It robbed me of so much when my ds was a baby. I am so much more aware of myself this time and am never going back there.

So have we anyone expecting twins?

panto that's awful - so sorry you've had to go through it, and hope you can get some better care from now on. I got quite stressed yesterday when I went for a reassurance appointment with the recurrent miscarriage consultant - and got the minion. Based on my previous appointments, I'd been led to expect a quick scan to check all ok, but she didn't have the equipment. I felt I had to push to get a scan - fortunately all ok - but it's difficult when you've been led to expect something.

Thanks for all your support guys.

Lets hope all our midwives/consultants are helpful and in a good mood.

Dress is below.

www.tiffanyrose.com/maternity/clothing/MIKB/Miko-Maternity-Dress-(Blackberry).html

Heading out now, but will update my bump photo later. Think the dress just seemed to accentuate it!

LOVE the dress Coolhand