Due in September 2006..... into the third trimester.....on the home run

[compo]

Hope no-one minds [smile

Liquidclocks - Poor you. My GP prescribed me paracetamol and codeine for migraines - in a powder called Paramax that you dissolve in water. They don't come as often as yours do from the sound of it though. I think the codeine is for the sickness, trouble is you need to take it before you start feeling sick, as once you're sick your stomach has stopped digesting anything. I don't know what you can take now though. I am worried about you, it sounds as though you work hard and maybe need to rest more to make sure you look after yourself. Please take care.

Hey ladies!

Feeling as haven't got to have mindee this afternoon so can laze at home. I have just put DD to bed and now have my feet up.

Also the friend I mentioned ages ago who had had three miscarriages has collapsed today and hubbie took her to hospital- I think she maybe preg?!!!

And another friend text yesterday saying she was 10 weeks (or so she thinks) preg...!

All these babies!!!

Thanks for the positive messages. I know in the long run I'm better off without my ex. I just never thought I'd be doing all this alone and it's hard sometimes. But, I'm trying to stay positive and am looking forward to meeting LO. Not long to go now!

Marls - I am so jealous! I've always wanted to visit Disneyland. I hope you have a fab holiday and definitely take it easy. Oh and I'll look up that song, thanks.

Am I the only one who's not having a birth plan? I've thought about it but as far as I'm concerned, I'm definitely having a hospital birth and as far as pain relief goes, I have no idea how I'll cope - I'm a big wuss when it comes to pain so I thought I'd just take it a step at a time, take anything offered if it gets too much and I'd only have a C-section if there was a problem and the Doctors thought it necessary. I really don't know what to expect. Is there anything else to the birth plan other than pain relief and whether you have a c-section or not?

Mandaz - that sounds like a great birth plan already. I had that one for DS - It goes something like 'I don't know what to expect so I'm open to any thing but I only want a section if I absolutely must' - the only thing I'm adding this time is 'and I won't let the midwife try and tell me I'm doing ok without painkillers, if I want them I'll b*dy well have them

Clairemow - sadly codeine isn't an anti-sickness thing (it actually makes me worse) it's more like a 'space youout a bit' drug. It helps the paracetamol work by relaxing you as well as being a painkiller in it's own right. It did work really well for me a few years ago but quickly lost it's effectiveness - one of the problems of taking medication too frequently.

DS fell on his head this morning on to concrete - was so worried as his nap was due and didn't know whether to let him sleep. Anway put him down and having the opposite problem - he's just happily chattering to himself - has been for an hour and a half now - going to have to go get him up i think!

Mandaz- I would write a birth plan... just even if you put in about you not coping with pain etc... then if mw's change shifts they can each read what you think and how you feel.
I even put in mine that I want the mw to let me get on with it and just check on me from time to time... I hate being fussed over and went through DD's birth with my eyes shut and just trying to deal with it. Occassionally glared at DP when he stated the bloody obvious- that another contraction was due as if I didn't know!!! MW I had when gavce birth to DD told her to go and have a cuppa and a sit down rather that be with me and i'd buzz if I needed her. Think she was happy with that and enjoyed me just dealing with it.

And put in my last plan and this that DP wanted to cut the cord and I wanted bubba first just out on me not cleaned just however she came. Unless there were any probs...

I agree with liquid clocks!!! Don't let the mw tell you that you're doing ok without pain relief!!! My mw when I had DD was great she had two of her own and she had an epidural with both. She said to me if I wanted an epidural to have one now while anethesitist was hanging around incase he was in operating room when I needed one. She was offering me drugs, left right and centre... This mw I have now tho seems to be the 'bite the wooden spoon' type.... Not my idea of pain relief.
Good on those womenwho have totally 'natural' birth but if i'm in pain I want some relief!!!

Actually mandaz, pol's right. Even if your birth plan's really vague write it down as it saves time and effort. You could also put in that it's your mum that'll be with you and could they please not ask about a DH as it might upset you at the time to be quizzed about whether he was coming? It is also really nice to have LO delivered onto your tummy as there's no waiting to be told they're ok or finding out sex if you're doing that. Also it makes you the first person to see baby properly!

Mandaz, personally think there is no point in having a birth plan...I don't really think you can plan for what actually happens! I think the best attitude is to go with the flow. Yes, you may want just gas & air / & / or an epidural or nothing or whatever but if you've set your heart on the birth turning out a particular way & then it doesn't happen I think it would be more dramatic.....I talk from experience!!!

Mabel..I'm very envious! DH & I (in life before child!!) used to surf a lot at Watergate bay & ejoyed many a lunch in that resturant which JO now owns...will be interested to know how it is...you deserve it, don't worry about the cost, hell a treat now & again is needed

Norms, so sorry to hear that! DS comments made me laugh though..

Hi everyone. Not posted for a couple of days as I've been quite sick. I don't feel completely overwhelmed by it this time as I seem to feel sick, get sick then am ok for a few hours. This must be what normal morning sickness is like!
I haven't been able to catch up on 3days of posts yet but I will do later. Sorry guys.

Saw the mw this morning and I'm measuring 30cm which is quite big for 28wks but I was big last time so I'm not going to worry. The baby isn't head down yet which is worrying me more as DS engaged at 29wks which I know was very early but still reassuring. I think I read somewhere that subsequent babies often don't engage until labour which is fine as long as baby turns head down.

Anyway, hope everyone has a great weekend!

prob won't get chance to get on again now before I go away, so have a good week ladies and I'll speak to you when I get back !

Thanks for the advice. I will write down my thoughts just in case, but I don't have any really strong wishes as far as the birth is concerned. Although, I will make sure they give me drugs when I need them! I like the idea of having LO passed straight to me but I think I'll let the mw cut the cord.

Liquid - it's already on my notes that I don't have a DH/DP and so far everyone has been very nice about it. My mw has told me to book onto classes which are mainly for people going alone rather than couples. I will put it in the plan though.

Homemamma - hope you feel better soon. I swear my LO is still lying right across me. My mw said it's too early to tell yet and that LO could still move quite a lot over the next few weeks.

I'm really looking forward to starting classes and looking around the hospital. I don't start mine until the end of July but that's not all that far away now!

pol really hope your friend's ok

LC glad your ds is okafer his fall

homemama so sorry you're feeling sick

mabel have a fantastic holiday

mandaz I totally know what you mean about not knowing how it'll be and therefore not wanting to write stuff down but as others have said what you've told us is essentially a birth plan. The other thing to think about including is whether you want told baby's gender or to discover for yourself and whether you want help to breastfeed asap.

I have a lovely sleep this afternoon while ds as resting - bliss! We've just made cupcakes that smell fantastic. ds is determined to ice them blue - tasteful!!

Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Mandaz, definitely write down your thoughts, but I also found last time mine just didn't happen. Wanted a waterbirth, v. little pain relief, but ended up with a c-section with an early breech baby - only 10 days, but a week before the appointment to try and turn him round...

Mandaz- as everyone is saying write down your thoughts, as I said mw's may change shift etc and instead of you going through bits again they can just be pointed to your birth plan, it may not be followed due to complications but it does give an idea to your mw what your aims and expectations are. (pain!)

It's too hot here! Busy eating ice lollies and sipping ice cold water. Gave DP £50 towards his nintendo ds and so he is happy as he's had a treat but he has just paid out for bubba cot and said he will pay for a new contract phone rather than pay as you go as he doesn't want my credit to run low now we are nearing the time!!! So I felt I oughta treat him and he has had me as mrs.hormonal for absolutely ages now.

Friend who is 10 weeks preg has said she isn't sure how she feels about her baby and i'm worried for her. I have never felt like this even about DD who wasn't plannned and DP and I had only been together for just over three months. Yes, we did talk about our options but I did say I understood if he wanted to call it a day but it was my bubba etc... I am trying to talk with her but finding it hard to understand sometimes how she actually does feel. Any one else felt like that and have any advice??? I feel for her as she has been trying for a while now (prob near on 2 yrs) and now she is preg is unsure. I think tho alot is to do with hormones. Also her mum left her when she was 4/5yrs with her Dad and didn't even say goodbye. Mum came back years later for her but obviously the damage was done and so I think that some where deep down she is worried that she might hurt her child that much too. And she said her mum had been asking her whether she was sure she wanted to keep it etc... and by the sounds of it forcing the issue. I'm really worried about her and want her to be happy and enjoy this time. i think tho it's just hit her she has to grow up too (she is 25, a yr younger than me) But she has always loved the 'single' life. Feeling so sad for her and trying to be as supportive as I can. She feels she can't tell her dp her feelings too as he is so excited. Am really concerned about her and now because we moved last yr i'm so far away for her to come over or me to go to her and just be there. Any advice?

Another hot night of not much sleep here... And gutted about the football!!
Pol- sorry to hear your friend is going through a tough time. Haven't got much advice except that perhaps when she goes for the 12 week scan she will feel more excited when she sees the baby? It is hard to feel excited in the first worrying weeks when you feel sick and hormonal - especially when she seems to have lots of other emotional stress to deal with. When you have your lo she'll get all broody again too hopefully

Hi Pol, it sounds as though your friend is having kind of last night nerves. She's obviously had a difficult time with her own relationship with her Mum (who doesn't sound like she's helping any...), and that must have a huge effect on her. I guess if they've been trying for ages as well, you sort of (but never really) get used to that disappointment every month, and once it's successful it's a big change of mind set. The first few months are so hormonal anyway (or is it the whole 9 1/2..??!), and maybe she's just had a sudden realisation of how much life will change for her. Maybe she could talk to her GP if he/she is good, or a counsellor if it gets too bad? She's also lucky that you are clearly a great friend for her, despite the distance.

Hope everyone's enjoying the sun - just wish it would cool down at night... gets a bit hot with pillows supporting the ankles/knees/bump...

Pol - really hard situation with your friend. I was 23 when I had DS and actually got pg 2 weeks after a 2nd trimester miscarriage. After convincing myself with baby 1 that it was the right thing (it was very poorly) and nature was doing the right thing, and it was unplanned anyway - the shock of being pg again, so young and unplanned, was very hard to deal with. I'd never go through with an abortion but I did find myself not wanting to be pg, thinking I was too young, would not make a good mother etc. Deep down I did want DS but I was so sad still, shocked and scared I went on a whole roller coaster of emotions to get to the point I was OK with it all. I was probably about 6 months along before I really felt 'happy' with the situation. Be there for your friend to talk to, tell her she's not alone in feeling like this and wold agree with clairemow - talk to m/w or counsellor about her fears, especially given the issues with her own mother. There might alsobe an element ofreadying herself for disappointment at the 12wk scan - I was convinced DS would have something wrong with him or be dead and was genuinely surprised he was ok, the psychological adjustment was very hard to cope with. Could go on, emotive complicated issue. - would your friend use MN?

On another issue - has anyone had problems with their DS/DD with 'flat head syndrome' or usedbaby pillows/positioning to prevent it? my DS definitely has a mishapen head and I want to avoid it this time.

Pol - Whilst my own situation is very different from your friends, I can sympathise with the way she is feeling. I've always wanted to get married and have kids. I'd been married 6 months and I was actually going through tests to see if there was a problem with me conceiving when I found out I was pg. I thought I was well on the way to having my dream. But then things went wrong between my hubby and me and I ended up alone. There have been moments in both the 1st and 2nd trimester when I've wished I wasn't pg - partly due to the fear of being alone and partly because I would have a constant link to my ex. Also, I kept getting opportunities pop up which I could have taken if I wasn't pg. However, the realy change for me was when I went to my 20 week scan. Apart from looking at LO in so much detail, they told me that LO might have Talipes (where the ankle twisted). I felt an overwhelming feeling of protectiveness and love for the little being growing inside me. I'd had an emergency scan at 8 weeks because my BP went sky high - because of the situation with my ex and I thought, LO is a fighter and it's doing it's best to survive despite all the things that have happened. Now, I can't wait to meet LO and start our new life together. I'm sure that your friend will feel more positive towards her LO as she gets further into her pg. There's so much going on at that stage and so many hormones whizzing around, it's not surprising she's feeling scared. I think that all you can do is offer your support and encourage her to look at the positive aspects of being pg. I hope she feels better soon and I thinks it's great that she has a good friend to support her through the hard times (sorry for the long reply]

I'm struggling with the heat at the moment. It's just so sticky. I've noticed that my feet are swelling up on a daily basis now. It's not just my ankles but the whole foot. Nothing else seems to be swelling though and I can't tell if it's just the heat or pg related. I've been trying to keep my feet up as much as I can but it doesn't seem to help. Is anyone else having swelling problems?

omg - it's hot! Mandaz, you're def not alone - I'm normally a size 3 and have bought some size 4 sandals and they're STILL tight! DO ring your midwife though if concerned for a BP check as we're now at the stage where pre-eclampsia can be a problem - especially as you're first timer.

Going to sit in the cellar now...

I'm glad it's not just me Liquid! I just don't do heat at the best of times and I feel like a sticky beached whale at the moment!

By the way, does anyone know if Sainsbury's still do a Mum and Baby club? I've looked on their website but can't see anything.

hey everyone,

haven't read any posts, so I hope everyone is ok and coping with the heat.

Bad news - blood pressure sky high on tuesday and protein ++ for first time so I have been admitted to the hospital with pre eclampsia. Am drugged up to try and get the b pressure down and they've let me out for lunch with DH today for 2 hours.

I'm in till lo is born and at 30+4 today, we are desperately trying to get to 32 weeks! Fingers crossed

Hope all the bumps cook well and wil lbe thinking of you all as I'm in there trying not to go stir crazy - we may even have a July baby, let alone august!

lol
xxxx

Best wishes lyesttes, hope everything goes well for you.

Best of luck Lysettes - Hang On In There & hope you that all goes well xxxxx

PS being in hospital is a fantastic excuse for catching up on really important reading .... get DH to bring in those Hello's / OK's / Cosmopolitans on every visit!!

Lysettes - hope all goes well and you can get to 32 weeks, hope you have plenty of reading material for hospital too! Give us an update when you can - otherwise, enjoy lunch with DH!

Lysettes- We are all thinking of you!!! Keep lo in there a bit long as he needs more cooking! I hope you have a nice meal with DH tho as hospital food is yucky!!!

Mandaz- I am permanently like shrek now, with huge swollen feet and ankles and wrists... my rings came off long ago. Think if I was painted green Shrek and I would be identical. Nothing makes them go down and i'm even swollen in the morning, although not quiet so tight. I am usually a size 6 shoe but now in size 8 and have one pair of sandals and a pair of pumps which fit me. Going to ask the mw on Wed when I see her.

I am hating this hot weather!!! I didn't sleep at all last night, as was too sticky and felt no better even after a cold shower this morning- seems like we're in for 5 days like this!!!

Told friend to join mumsnet and she is, hopefully chatting on her antenatal thread may help, but I think her mum isn't helping at all. Offering her all the support I can and trying to see if she will talk to her mw/doc etc... just so she is happier to know it is normal.