September 2013- We've managed to hold them in!

[fl0b0t]

Hi all! Providing the ladies who are currently in hospital don't give birth before the last 20 posts in our old thread, we've made it to a new one with babies all still staying put for now!

Here's the stats thread www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/a1694946-September-2013-STATS-THREAD

Welcome newbies! If anyone wants to join the FB group (better for sharing documents and pictures), please message myself or jennimoo with your real life name and email address and we can add you to the group!

:-)

Welcome elbombero!

Thanks for your thoughts and experiences on visitors. I think part of my problem is not quite knowing how my mum will be. She can be fab, or just a total bucket of randomness. I know dad will potter and bring food and wash up, and im not quite sure about dh's dad, who does totally random stuff like buy soap and flannels when he stays instead of just asking yo borrow making me feel totally incompetent at running a house although otherwise is absolutely lovely. Mainly I don't think he's comfortable to potter and help out in our house. Maybe I should actually just talk to them all? I love the idea of a big BBQ party as the first baby show, but as family and friends are all over the country I don't think that would work for us. Will think on...

Ion just had a v rewarding argument with some idiots in the swimming pool ...which I won

sgj til sounds like a tool, so sorry. Head for bed as soon as you can.
last time that happened, I let dh clean the house when his pa arrived :)

Ooh sorry to hear of more aches and pains and in-law woes.. I'm not sure if you remember my MIL from one of our earliest threads who refused to acknowledge this baby? Well, she has still failed to ever refer to the pg, baby, etc etc. incredible!
We have always had lots of visitors soon after birth, but none staying over. They were all v good about making a cuppa, bringing cake and not out staying welcome. DH has never managed to take much paternity leave so I have quite liked the company tbh. Your days/ nights are so looong when you have a newborn that a short visit doesn't really impact on bonding time too dramatically ;) having said that I would NOT want anyone staying over, you do need some peace, definitely!
And welcome bombero. 2 stone at 36wks, normal bmi before, 3rd pg. think it depends on so many individual factors though that comparisons are pretty meaningless?

FIL has so far asked me if I'm sure it's not twins and told me that he has a very busy weekend planned, seeing all of his friends at various pubs during the time whilst he's here... seems like the only time he's scheduled to see us or DD was tonight (when she's asleep) and when we're ferrying him from one pub to the next... so the bright side is that at least we've got some unexpected time to ourselves! Old git is now asleep as he's drunk 2 Adnams and an expensive bottle of red by himself... time for bed for me!
Needless to say we won't have to worry about him racing here to see us when baby is born!!

Gosh twintrimum hope you're ok. Good luck with tomorrow's appointment.

Just moved house and saw new midwife today who told me to make sure my bag was packed (which it is most definitely not)! Wondering if it was just general advice or if she had some reason for thinking I might go early (currently 35+3). She also said I should expect some grinding pain as the baby engages and man she wasn't wrong. Ow, ow, ow tonight! Anyone else had this?

Manoodle - I think something like that pain woke me last night. Was agony!

SJG - I'm mad for you about your FIL! At the mo I don't like anyone staying let alone someone being like that. Dreading early labour and having parents / in laws here to look after DD.

SGJ, you have far more self control than me, your FIL would have had a few choice words! Cheeky git. If he wants to stay in a hotel, he should have booked one. If he wants to treat your house as a hotel, then he needs to pay for it!

Grinding pains, check! Bump emgaes for a few days, then pops back up, so I keep alternating walking normally, and walking like John Wayne. Flipping hurts, especially if I bend forwards suddenly and sort of push her down a bit further!

I've been getting crampy pains in the morning, asked MW who said that they fall into the range of normal niggles, but to call her if they start coming in waves, or getting stronger. The lo and behold last night, every 12 mins, 10, 8, then they stopped after a bit more than an hour. I am taking my notes to work with me and packing my hospital bag tonight! Not overly worried about an imminent arrival as I went into early labour with DD1 at 34 weeks, had an overnight stay at hospital, and everything stopped on it's own. DD1 then went on to be almost 2 weeks overdue.

As for visitors, I wanted immeadiate family to come and see us straight away, so had lots of visitors to the hospital. We only had one turn up at our home unannounced, but they refused drinks, brought knitted cardis, best wishes and hugs, and left soon after. When people asked when they could visit, we told them what times DD was likely to be awake and let them pick, and kept a sort of bookings diary on a white board! (DH has a BIG family, we had visitors every day) If people wanted to turn up during naps times I told them they could if thy wanted, but there might not be much point if they wanted to hold DD. No one ever tried to wake her up, I never felt worried that they would. I think perhaps the boundaries were silently written in when we "booked appointments" for people! It didn't strike me at the time that I could have been considered rude, and tbh I still don't care if I was. Those first few weeks are so special, and I wasn't very well for a while, so everyone seemed very obliging. Once I could, we also went for lots of walks out, for fresh air, for a break. Never at the same time, so "poppers in" could end up sat outside for ages, which tends to put them off.

Morning all, completely lost this thread, been using fb, and clearly is too much to do two things

Visitors is something which is worrying me too, with a first baby I have no idea what to expect and quite fancy taking some time to get to know the bundle as well as get to know what life is like with a baby. I'm the first person out of my friends and family to have one (since me!) so feels like stepping into the abyss!

Thankfully friends and family aren't far away (would be a nightmare if we had to put them up!) but dh has a big family and its my families first grandchild so can't imagine we can get away with telling people to stay away. But I will be telling people when they can come and dh's happy to tell his family too. I like the idea of giving people times, but no idea when nap times are? Assume it varies from baby to baby...omg...I know nothing!

Double leg cramp in the early hours of this morning, from sleeping on/half under just a sheet, with the fan on because it was so warm yesterday evening. Absolute agony, woke DH up with my "ow ow ow stop stop it stop it!". Still hurts actually, must have left lactic acid deposit in the muscles or something.

Today was the last day I wake up to the alarm! Exam this morning, pop into work to see what's been going on, then home for birthday party preparations and then a week down at parents' farm. Baby permitting, I'll be going into work the week after, but not at commuter-time, and not for full days.

SGJ, I would have had to ave said something pretty sharp to that FIL. What a tosser.

There is so much I would like to say to him but since we only see him once a year at most, I'm just going to bite my tongue for a couple of days. He's v old; lots of his behaviour is a generational thing, I think. The benefit if his flying visit here, though annoying, is that we won't be expected to travel to Devon to see him for a while. And 'a while' could be a long time indeed since we'd have to hire a place to stay - he won't have 2 children to stay at his house - too disruptive!!

Rake good luck with the exam!

Glad you mentioned the grinding pain Manoodledo - I was just saying to OH that's exactly how it feels! I hope her head is getting engaged or getting ready because my twin sister was told she had a narrow pelvis and my nephews head never got engaged - after 30 hours if being induced she ended up having an emergency c section. I just hope I can deliver my baby naturally.

Flip how did your various appointments go yesterday with regards to the diabetes - hope all went well.

SGJ sounds like you have the patience of a saint! I have MIL next weekend - I always feel like I am being judged but she can be lovely too - just her son can of course do no wrong!

Re visitors, we started out strict last time. It was made known to everyone that DH was in charge of visits and when we were ready they would be informed! (Makes me a bit now!)

As it was, after an awful labour and crash section I just really wanted to see my Mum (a very odd feeling for me) and show DD off. So we ended up having ths whole lot come to the hospital, much to the displeasure of the MWs (think 2010 swine flu epidemic) who wouldn't let anyone in, not even one at a time, miserable gits! So we all ended up stood in the corridor opening presents! Completely unplanned but actually lovely!

This time we will be relying on family to come to our aid for childcare for DD so I feel it would be churlish to turn them away for the odd early visit or two. My parents are 3.5 hours away so they will be staying nearby. Not having anyone stay here though!

We'll have to have people staying during labour but they have been told they can't hang around indefinitely once we come home. My MIL understands but I'm not sure my mum does... She outstayed her welcome last time around (stayed in hotel but didn't go home until late of an evening...) and witnessed me breaking down hysterically crying as was sleep deprived and suffering insomnia too. I might have to remind her of that...

Charl, you're not the only one with a golden balls DP! My mil would still come and wipe his ass if he asked.

All going well, thanks Charl. I've to keep on monitoring until Wednesday when it will be reviewed again. At the moment I'm managing to diet control. Struggling with breakfast, I'll try eggs tomorrow but don't really fancy having them everyday. Scan on Tuesday, so we'll have a better idea of growth, a fortnight ago it was over 90th centile. They have said they won't let me go over my due date. At last scan my placenta was still low too, hoping that's moved now.

I'm walking very gingerly around my workplace as sitting hurts. Still got horrendous back pain. Am completely shattered and just want to throw in the towel now. Done in, I could cry, I give up! :-(

I was fine with visitors last time but all our relatives are local so no long visits. I'm happy for people to call round this time as long as they stick the kettle on.

frogchops I really sympathise, just try to keep going and just do what your body tell you to. At the moment it seems to be that each day is different to the next with me. One day I've completely had enough and am so shattered then the next day I feel loads of energy. Try to take each day as it comes?

It's my birthday today (whoop!) and spent the morning out our first 'parentcraft' class. We are not doing nct and I have to say this NHS was pretty good. Is just this session and one on bf next week. They covered everything and every scenario and I left feeling jemmed-up and without any unanswered questions.

For all of those still left to pack their bags they recommened lucozade tablets for the pushing stage to give you a boost of energy which seems like a good tip.

I don't think I've had this grinding feeling yet (33+2) but my mum says I will know when he's engaged as it feels like a pessle and mortle rubbing together! Great lol.

Happy Birthday Geese and thanks for the lucozade tablet tip, I'll get me some of those!!

That's lucozade tablets on the shopping list. Really need to get my ass into gear with this bag this weekend
Have bought big pants, and they are huge. However, the leg holes don't feel big enough :-/ can't have them cutting in, it'll do my head in.
Might ask my mum if I can have an old nightie, cos I have none :-/ buying a cheapy one seems a bit silly.
ION I have a week and three days left at work....I bought reeses pb cups to quash the pb craving without opening my new jar .....am contemplating a Chinese for tea but am studying each items liklihood to involve nasty heartburn..... And I've assembled my Moses basket stand in the living room and am slightly that there is going to be a baby in it very soon.

Interesting thoughts on visitors! We will have MIL for a few days 2-4 weeks after baby arrives (providing it's on due date or late) as in laws live abroad, but she can be pretty self-sufficient. No idea about anything or anyone else, other than my sister may want to visit half term as she works in schools,(but may not?) and I've just got no idea! Will play it by ear I think!

I think that's the right way Fl0 , as you just don't know how you're going to feel until the time comes.

Aw frog! Hang on in there.

Emma, I have been researching obsessively and regularly about survival rates since bleeding in the fourth month... somehow having that information available calms me down more than having no anchors at all.

Re. visitors - I am hoping my mother can come already before birth to help out - DH works abroad, with a regular commute, and I am afraid of being stuck on my own! Other than that, I'd prefer not to see anyone for the initial period, I think. I'd happily email around the first photos, then switch off my phone and let DH handle would-be visitors if possible. I just expect that recovering from giving birth and looking after the baby will take up all my energy.

A friend has kindly offered to visit me this month from abroad, and I think I'll have to explain to her that my mobility and energy levels are already so low that I fear I could not entertain her properly...

TMI question: have you been doing perineal massage? I have just tried this evening for the first time and it hurt. like. hell. I couldn't even do the massage properly like I've seen on YouTube, sticking in a thumb was already uncomfortable and trying to apply some pressure was too much (sorry for the oversharing). Doesn't bode well for a whole baby making its way out!