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Due in October 2012 Part 7 - towards the finish line, going for Gold!

999 replies

Planktonette · 30/08/2012 20:39

On your marks...
Get set...

GO!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
MickeyTheShortOne · 22/09/2012 18:14

my pelvis is giving up. that is all

Angelico · 22/09/2012 18:18

Right meltdown time because I feel like murdering my husband. I am so angry at him Angry Angry Angry

We are having this baby in 3 days and we still haven't got a name for her. We had a joint shortlist of lovely names (ie approved by both of us) and every single one of them he has shot down in flames for a variety of completely fucking stupid reasons over the last few days. So there was one we had pretty much nailed our colours to and now he has backtracked on it, leaving us with none. NOTHING. Not a sausage.

He has tried to go back to one which I loved and he apparently hated but has had a sudden change of heart... only he totally put me off it while he still 'hated' it Hmm, along with every single name I loved. He is now going through the dregs list in search of inspiration and cannot understand why I am upset at the idea of calling our daughter one of the shitty, reject names.

It is hard to explain how angry and upset this has made me feel. I don't know how much of this is just hormones but I feel like he has taken every bit of pleasure out of picking this name and it has made me feel so :( :( :(

Anyway, thank you for reading my crazy :( I may have been calm enough about the CS, the GD etc but apparently choosing a name is my personal Armageddon...

Angelico · 22/09/2012 18:19

Squid glad you're feeling better :) We appear to have swapped places in the stresshead stakes Confused

squidkid · 22/09/2012 18:28

Angelico I'm sorry you are upset :( Whenever my boyfriend is critical or negative I get really down about it, particularly if it's anything to do with baby, so I completely understand how you feel. I had a similar meltdown about names last week... having spent ages thinking about them around the 30 week mark we just sort of gave up and forgot about it... suddenly realised there could be a baby soon and need to make a decision! Then I realised the girl's name and the boy's name I like best don't go together at all even though I've been saying I'll "save" one for the next baby... really silly things to be upset about!

We did eventually have a long chat and are back to one name plus one reserve in case we change our minds for both a boy and a girl. I think you have enough reason to feel on edge and stressed right now and I'm not surprised it's coming out one way or another.... big hugs. It'll come to you. You don't HAVE to name a baby immediately. Take a breather and come back to it when you're both feeling less stressed, maybe...

(I still remember 'Arry! 'Arry! That was you wasn't it...)

hufflepuffle · 22/09/2012 18:33

Squid glad u feeling better!! This is a roller coaster, no doubt about it!!

Angelico ........ I am hoping we will hav a consensus decision on name when bubba arrives. We cannot agree, so massive. Keep hearing tales of new mums being tired/high/in theatre or otherwise pre disposed and dads deciding on names and it being written in chart by time mum Back in real world....... Well bloody dare he!!! Well warned here. And does not matter if takes few days to agree, you will get there.

That is all, sorry to not reply any further back than 2 most recent posts..... Blush

Angelico · 22/09/2012 18:39

Thanks Squid & Huffle. I am sorely tempted to give him a Dirty Harry style speech (complete with loaded pistol):

"Listen, sperm donor!!! I have grown this bean in my womb for NINE FUCKING MONTHS!!! I have been probed, prodded, have bled inexplicably at random intervals AND had to GIVE UP CAKE!!! Henceforth this Bean shall be known as Ariadne, 'Arry for short. Want to argue? Go ahead, punk - MAKE MY DAY!!!"

Oooooooh, that feels better already :o

smileyhappymummy · 22/09/2012 19:34

squid glad you're feeling a bit better, you are allowed to complain, even with an easy pregnancy it's still absolutely knackering! If you hadn't had a full night's sleep for months for any other reason you'd feel allowed to complain wouldn't you? Pregnancy isn't an illness but it feels like one sometimes! I sympathise on the reaching feet thing by the way, struggled with socks this morning. Your sling looks like the one we had with dd (which was a hugabub), it was amazing and frequently saved my sanity. She was happy and content in it and would nap in it, and it ws comfortable for both me and dh to wear, used it until she was about 1.
angelico I love your dirty Harry style speech - made me properly giggle! With dd I knew exactly what I wanted to call her from around 20 weeks, this time still really unsure and may have to just wait and see! Hope your dh is being understanding, nice and supportive and has told you you can call your baby whatever you like! Seriously, I think wit everything you're dealing with you are v much entitled to a bit of a meltdown. It's hard going.
I haven't done much today except be a grumpy cow. Don't know why! Friends coming tomorrow which will be nice (hopefully!). Getting the odd bit of low down pain which is vaguely period like but am almost certain its constipation related - really hope so as I am terrified of the prospect of going into labour before section date - I so badly want this to be planned and calm and am going to totally freak out if not.

WantAnOrange · 22/09/2012 19:48

Angelico That is so frustrating! DH won't talk to me about middle names. He picked a first name that he loves and has his heart set on, and I'm going with it, but it's a difficult one to pick a middle name for and he's not interested, so I've just picked one I like and said "this is it ok?".

Are we sharing names?

squidkid · 22/09/2012 20:21

My names are quite simple ones

James for a boy, but we'll always call him Jamie
Jess for a girl

(Backups are Robert and Jaime in case I have a sudden change of heart.)
(Now I feel very vulnerable!)

WantAnOrange · 22/09/2012 20:32

Ok, I'll be brave to! We have...

Artemis Lily

Artemis is DH's favourite name ever and I chose Lily, because I had Lily of the valley as my wedding flowers. She will probably be Missy as a nick name.

Elpis · 22/09/2012 20:54

Thanks squidkid - and smileyhappymummy, I understand exactly what you mean about not wanting to go into labour before the ELCS. If it does happen I want it to be incredibly quick so at least I can say I did it naturally - not have the worst of both worlds, like last time... The hospital have given me loads of info about the operation so perhaps yours will too. I even have my sexy compression stockings in the right size and have been tested for MRSA with nasal swabs so I can be approached with extreme caution if I'm carrying it...

Like some others here I've developed a nasty cold with headaches and a touch of earache. I'm also starting to stress about the possibility of an MS relapse post-birth. Theoretically it's more likely as pregnancy hormones seem to protect against them and these fall off rapidly post-birth. On the other hand I didn't have one last time and haven't relapsed for over four years, so my odds must be pretty good.

After a good first week at preschool, DD has had some ghastly tantrums in the past couple of days, mainly triggered by DH and I doing things for her that she thinks she can do herself. Have remained calmly beatific despite spending nearly an hour sewing elastic into her ballet shoes (I fucking hate sewing) and taking her on a total of six buses and a train yesterday for preschool/ hospital appt/ her French class. Work was a breeze by comparison!

I'd love to share the name we've settled on but I am very wary about revealing too much online. The nature of my job means I know how much can be gleaned about people's lives through astute research, and how their reputations can be destroyed by malevolence. Sorry to be a downer... Sad

Good luck everyone! Since I am rarely far from my iPhone I'll probably post an update post-op on Weds or Thu morning from the postnatal ward...

bella2012 · 22/09/2012 23:04

thanks so much for the bikini link yomping. I think you are so kind that you always take the trouble to research things or share what you have found out. i really appreciate it x

bella2012 · 22/09/2012 23:07

also, thanks very much for the work advice everyone. Still not decided...

Sorry your dh is being a nobber angelico. We are having similar name struggles and it is so hard to agree!

Angelico · 22/09/2012 23:25

He is being a nobber indeed Bella :( He has just come in to try and talk about it but I don't even want to be around him. It's hard to understand because I'm normally a pretty rational person but I feel completely miserable about this. I know it's at least 50% hormones (and probably subconscious worries about all things bean) but I'm so angry I could spit. I just know we're going to end up with some shit compromise name that I'll hate afterwards :( He's now backtracking on various names he shot down in flames before but he has basically made me dislike all the names I loved before, leaving sweet FA. Hope you and your DH can agree on a name without bloodshed!

MrsConfusion · 23/09/2012 08:29

angelico so sorry DH is being a nobber, you're quite right to be upset and I hope after a night's sleep he can understand better. Boys are stupid - mostly lovely, but also stupid. :(
squid be gentle with yourself my lovely, your mind and body are superbusy and are not giving you an easy time, so wrap yourself up with TLC.

bella thanks so much for asking about bikini (and yomping for answering), I had somehow completely failed to think through what to wear if I do get to use the waterpool. Idiota. Wonder what else I've completely failed to get/think through/realise I need...?

My back gave up at 2.30am today, been up since then with a few bits of snoozes. Neither head nor spine would let me sleep, especially not lying down. Stupid spine! I'm predicting a meltdown today.

Hope you can all stay in the dry and warm today, weather looks vile. Hugs to all, we're getting closer and closer to meeting these babies and eventually getting our bodies back.

YompingJo · 23/09/2012 08:40

Hello ladies - another day of being pregnant dawns!

Know exactly what squid means about feeling like you are never not going to be pregnant. I'm not due for another week and a half, but since I hit 37 weeks, and worse 38 weeks, the knowledge that the baby could come at any time makes me feel like I am due NOW, and every day nothing happens is really hard to bear! It'd getting more and more physically uncomfortable too, some of the baby's movements make my eyes water, most sitting positions are not comfortable for more than 5 minutes, I have the attention span of a goldfish so cant concentrate on anything, even find watching films hard and that used to really relax me, and I'm bloody knackered even after doing virtually nothing. Boo to pregnancy! People keep telling me I'm still active and fit but my energy levels and the dimply state of my legs tell a very different story Sad

Also know what you mean about indignity of not being able to bend over - this is one thing I've had for ages now even though I've been spared most other things. Went into town yesterday to try yet again to find some trousers that fit my thighs as I realised it's getting cooler and short elasticated skirts may well not do for much longer Confused. Hated having to remove my boots in each changing room then struggle to get them on again, was a cross, sweaty mess by the end of it, then to make it worse I pulled the left boot onto my right foot, and nearly cried at the energy I had wasted! Then I lost my favourite cardie which I had hung over my handbag strap as so hot and sweaty, and it must have fallen off somewhere in town. Hey ho. Found some jeans that sort of fit though and some comfy PJs in Mamas & Papas and was so relieved, didn't even baulk at their prices.

Angelico, we have had name issues too but my DH would really sympathise with you as it is me who is being difficult about it, we had chosen one for a boy and had a shortlist for a girl with a favourite and a second favourite, and I went off both of the favourite girls names in quick succession in the last couple of weeks. It seems sometimes like, never mind raising a child, choosing the right name is the biggest fucking responsibility in the world. It needs to work for a baby, toddler, teenager and adult, it needs to have the right mix of formality and casualness, it needs to be shortened and to not cause any issues there, now to give the poor kid bad initials. I'm not at all sure all of those things are even possible at the same time!

Our boy choice is Elliott Jamie
Our current girl choice is Alexandra (Lexie) Jamie.

DH likes the initials thing - EJ or AJ. I like Lexie, but I'm not convinced about Alexandra. I want her to have the long name so she has choices. But "this is our baby, Alexandra"... I dunno, sounds a bit... wanky to me Confused. We flirted with Keira for ages but the whole issue of all the different spellings (Keira, Kiera, Kira, Kyra, Ciara) really put me off, don't want her to have to spell her name for everybody all the time, she will have to do that with her surname anyway. I liked Jamie as a first name for a girl too but then... it could well be a burden, having a boy's name as a first name, unless she is a certain type of girl. I overthink this so much and tie myself up in knots!

Thinking of all the peeps with things happening tomorrow or Tuesday: Lisbeths, Angelico, CWest, Elpis, I hope it goes well, can't wait to hear your stories and "meet" your babies!

Right, breakfast time!

lisbethsopposite · 23/09/2012 08:50

Hi Girls, I've been keeping track on my phone the last while but I said I would not reply until I could do it properly.

With a 2yr old I had just resolved to spend less time on the computer as I found myself checking back to this site to see if anyone had news and how were we all - then I had my dramatic news (induction date) and I am really touched by the understanding and support you have all given me.
I regard this group as friends - I am not mistaking it with RL but we are going through a big event together and supporting each other. I think it is like being in a lifeboat. It is dark so we can't see each other, but we are chatting away as we wait for rescue - have a long post in mind (notes done) but will have to do in dribs and drabs, toddler pulling me...

LoopyLa · 23/09/2012 08:50

Morning Ladies Smile

I actually didn't sleep too badly last night (first time in months) and think I had more than 4/5 hours so feel more human today. It means I must stop fannying around and do 1) my birthplan 2) pack my hospital bag. Yes indeedy?

Don?t know why I?ve not done either of the above yet, I?m usually such an organised person. I think it?s because half my head is still very ?work? focussed (2 weeks to go!!) so trying to wrap things up there & keeping fingers crossed baby doesn?t appear at 37weeks (day after I finish work Grin!)

Saw in-laws yesterday & it?ll probably be the last time before baby arrives so tried to be as blunt but gentle as possible when it came to them talking about visiting us when baby has arrived ? I?m sure it did not sink in at all! Hmm

This has been v self-involved ? just how many ladies are due/giving birth this week, I?ve lost track! Shock I?m thinking of you all and look forward to hearing birth stories Smile GOOD LUCK!

LoopyLa · 23/09/2012 08:56

Cross-posted with Yomping & lisbeth!

Lisbeth - I totally feel the same about support & understanding here, not sure I could have got through the 8 months without everyone here! Smile

Yomping - thank you for the list of ladies who are due this week! And I also love Keira, it's one of our shortlist names.

Zara1984 · 23/09/2012 09:19

Hello ladies - so excited for those of you who are now at the finish line!!

Things are very uneventful for me in comparison! My great excitement yesterday was buying a tumble dryer Grin

Got quite a fright last night - our friends whose baby was due on 5 October had their little boy yesterday!!! So so wonderfully happy for them but they were the last ones to go before us.... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Fuck! Baby can stay put till Oct 26th at least.... please!

Anyway I hope my friend's birth went well and she is feeling ok, AFAIK she was induced b/c of pre -eclampsia (she was 38 weeks).

hufflepuffle · 23/09/2012 09:20

Morning all! Reasonable sleep last night, sun shining this morning! Going in to work for few hours. Please do not fret about this or be cross, is an excellent idea, no staff and no patients means will get loads done and leave my last week less jam packed and stressful!! Will potter about and nest that baby properly for new mummies to look after!!!!

Had glass of white wine last night and feel like have bit of hangover Shock . Do not miss hangovers one iota. This lack of alcohol has made me realise that even more. Might keep it up!! ( yeah, likely........)

I too love the name Ciara (most common spelling here) but any name with any vague Irishness to it has been vetoed by DH. Our reasons will seem insane to most of you, but this is Northern Ireland.......
There are a lot of silly small minded people here who judge people on being catholic or protestant and an Irish sounding name usually gives the assumption a person is catholic. As it happens, we practice neither but we do not want to give our child a 'label' for anyone to assume. Pathetic, non??

Pity. Cos I love Ciara, Niamh, Meabh (Maeve) Conor and Finn.

Not telling you my names i am afraid. Love mumsnet and can echo anyone's thoughts in the wonderful support you have all been. Do not like that anyone and everyone can read or join our conversations tho. Feel i have probably shared too much and would hate for a patient or a local to put 2&2 together......... I am a very private person and dislike gossip intensely!!!! But I will happily share the good news to every one of you via PM when baby named!!!

So as ever, little catch up, just my ramblings..... Hope to give u all better attention once finished work. Take it easy and take care, promise I'll not stay in work all day!!!!

Xx

MickeyTheShortOne · 23/09/2012 09:27

Good morning ladies :) I also slept quite well last night and actually had a lie-in for the first time all week, without being too uncomfortable. Then DP woke me up for some morning sex.. so I'm not complaining. I got a cuppa tea after too! :o

Angelico I hope you feel a bit better today. Sympathising on the nobber DP front. There are some names that DP won't even consider which really upsets me at times, he goes to great lengths to put me off them! To make it worse the one name we had decided on from day one, as it was one we both loved, he has now gone off because we made the mistake of watching Eastenders the other day. I still love it so I'm hoping he forgets about it in the next 7 weeks and then I can use it :D Even more so, I kind of hope we have a boy as we definately have two choices and it makes our lives easier... Wink

So we're thinking..
Jasper/Archie Max Peter Clark for a boy
or..
Lola/Esmae/Evie/Pippa Maxie Clark for a girl.

See my predicament? lol!!

Gosh Loopyla Thats on my list of things to do today. Along with.. Buy a second hand sofa, start sorting out the baby's room, have a bath, have a really big nice roast dinner. And my stepdad is coming round to put shelves up. Hopefully :o Then I can put all my photos up!!

MickeyTheShortOne · 23/09/2012 09:31

And I would also like to thank you all for the support you have all given me.. I don't know what I would've done without you all. Xxxxx

MickeyTheShortOne · 23/09/2012 09:32

Ooh and also yomping my cousin's little girl is called Jamie, and she is the girliest girl going :o xxx

londonlivvy · 23/09/2012 10:10

Hello ladies.

I had a fab family afternoon yesterday and am TOTALLY excited about my sis's old buggy which they brought over. My dad has spent hours cleaning it and changing the tyres and fixing a tear in the fabric and so on and it looks amazing - looks new! Which is frankly impressive given that it's about 7 years old. Did a bit of a test drive round the house with DF rolling his eyes at me.

I absolutely agree with everyone who's said what an absolute boon this antenatal group has been. such an incredible resource of information and support and loveliness. YAY.

Oooh tough call on all the name decisions. I had a name for a girl that I'd wanted to call my daughter since I was about ten. We had agreed to it (I thought) before I even got pregnant. Sadly he's now not sure and we're back to random lists. :-(
HOWEVER he is a softie at heart and I suspect when he sees what I have to go through to bring her into this world, I may get the name after all.

I too slept much better last night and even managed a lie in too. Hurrah for that. And now I just need to get onto my coursework for my teacher training course and do some essays and lesson planning. And then watch a trashy film or similar whilst DF is out!

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