PESH deli: the one where we get loads of lays

[LadyGoneGaga]

BESH BAYBEES

dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.
Silversky, boy, born Nov 1
SomethingSuitablyWitty, girl born Nov 2
okiecokie, girl, born Nov 12
Honeymoo, boy, born Nov 11
ReginaMonologue, boy, born Nov 13
Maswera, boy, born Dec 24
PollyPoo, girl, born Jan 5?
MrsFC, boy, born Jan 7

UPDIFFED

ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 Jan
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24
Muser, blooming at last, due February 27
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 27th Feb
Medee, doesn't feel as "neat" as everyone makes out, due March 12
Casserole, completely out of witty things to add, due April 8
Scorpette, thinking of displaying her enorma-bump at freak shows, due 18th May.
Laurielou, the unmarried hussy with the "surprise" diff, due 31 May (ish)
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 1 June.
TwinkleToes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 20 June.
Orchid, hoping for a zen like child, due 1st July
Ginfox, loving the new mega-boobs, due 12th July.
LadyGoneGaga, Has lost her waist, due 24 July
Ivegotmrbitey, Marmite is a lovely name for a baybee, due 27th July.
Milanomum, showing it off, due Aug 6th
Owlbooty, can't stop belching, due 7th August
Ocarina, there's a what in there?! due late August
BarbiesBeaver, Forever the Dildocam Slut, due Early October
Mountie, too shy to shine, due Autumn

Btw am proud as midge has put lots of weight back on and we are managing feeding despite the tongue tie, and my boobs haven't actually fallen off (yay me :))

Have been referred to get it snipped. Which I am officially Not Thinking About as it makes me cry. But then currently EVERYTHING makes me cry

Gin I am mightily impressed by your coherent post . You are indeed a DHB.

Can't wait to see the pics. Bet he's another little cutey.

Wrong on both counts Boxy - have been at home having lovely relaxation & fear-release sesh with amazing hypno-lady. Left me so chilled that it took me 1/2 an hour to prise myself from the sofa after she'd gone, so have been lying here with muttley snuggled round my tummy.

So, no progress from yesterday and now under strict instructions to do nothing today....might venture out for a tramp round the fields a bit later tho.

All this talk of red meat has got me salivating - will be sending MrCluck out to the butchers to pick-up some fillet which I will be having rare with a blue cheese sauce [drools]

Lovely to hear from you Muse - have read your story and am amazed at how fast it all happened . If birthing were an Olympic sport you'd be a gold medallist fo' sho'

Good to hear the nipples are holding up too Gin and won't be long before the waterworks get back to normal and you can revert to DHB status.

Hope the MW goes well today Rocky.

Aww gin! DHB status restored for being able to type that coherently. I'm sure midge will be fine and as score said best get it sorted sooner rather than later. Glad the boobs havent fallen off :o (that would be such a waste)

Nice to hear from you Gin. My nephew had tongue tie and they never sorted it and even now I think his speech isn't as clear as could be (he's 15) so I think much better to get it sorted out quickly.

Fab that feeding going well , I think it may have been me sent you a friend request...am I in running gear?

Muse! Am mightily impressed by your birth story (esp. the use of 'ouchy'). Have left you a comment over there too, you bloody star

And Gin! You are a DHB ESHpiration! Am glad your nips are staying as lovely as they are in my sordid fantasies Have seen the pics - he is just edible! All the ESH babies are gorgeous (not biased at all) - must be our reward for waiting so long!

Kate, how would you feel if Medee actually overtook you?! Are you sure you've not just got an extreme case of trapped wind in there?

Rocket, I got to hear the hb at my last MW appointment. The fact that our heartbeats were synchronised made up for the fact she made tactless comments about the severity of my stretchmarks I had a few questions to ask but she was really trying to get rid of me after we'd done the essential chat 'n' checks, but I don't think that's strictly representational of what to expect (and I asked anyway). You go ask away!

I like my meat cremated too - lovely to find someone else who does

I'm very happy if Kate goes first, for both our sakes'!

Sorry Meds, think I'm muddling you up with Drom .....although, the rate I'm going you could both overtake me.

Is so lovely to see all the ESH babies turning up safe and well. Muse am in awe of your super-speedy sneezing ability, that is proper hardcore

I have been to see my midwife today. I luff her. She let me record the heartbeat on my phone and says I can pop in and see her to hear it again whenever I need to as she has a drop in clinic.

I then rang my Mum to tell her the good news and discovered that she managed to have three kids with no pain relief whatsoever as she didn't fancy the gas and air. My Mum is a DHB, clearly. I am v.impressed with her but will not be refusing the G&A, hell no.

Rocket you were seeing MW today too, yes?

I am in such a good mood I might even share my doughnuts with you all. Probably best before I eat the fecking lot, really :)

Oooh la la gaga! I would like my pregnancy en francais too! Wine still tastes like meths to me but I am enjoying a can of Mackesons on a Friday night. Am clearly enjoying my diffment in the old man stylee instead!

Kate that is my first post-lay meal plan too! Although I am fancying a pate starter and a sorbet for pud as well.

Everyday one of the ESH will say something to reming that as well as being sensitive, funny, snmart and compassionate women, they are all DHBs as well!

Ah booty your MW sounds like a star. I am glad to hear you have DHB genes, bodes well.

I finally got to meet Deirdre today and also there was a trainee MW who was really sweet, took her a while to find the heart beat but that's ok! wish I had thought to record it for TB. Anyway, I have the following to share with you all.

Prawns - she said best not to eat them at all as they are well known for carrying food poisoning and your immune system is less able to fight it off. I am quite likely to ignore this advice at some point tho if the prawn cocktail cravings to strong.. Come to think of it the only time I have been really properly ill with food poisoning it was from a dodgy king prawn (in a hot meal) and I certainly wouldn't fancy going there again.

Swimming - breast stroke is ok with legs unless you have spd. She said it's an individual thing, some people find it hard because the ligaments in your lower back are looser so it's more the arching of the back that's the problem. Back stroke or floating on your back is fine as you are supported by the water, same as in the bath really.

She also gave me the BF pep talk, I wanted to tell her she was preaching to the converted but cos she was training this youngun up let her give me the speel.

Oooh, rocket that's good news on the swimming. I can't do crawl. Hoorah for hearing heartbeat! It's the best thing evah.

I wonder if it's safer if you defrost and make the prawn cocktail yourself? That way at least you know nobody sneezed on it and it didn't sit in a warm place nicely festering for 8 hours or so.

I had the home birth pep talk. Apparently it is perfectly legitimate to decide at any point in the proceedings that you would rather go to the hospital instead. So now I think I want one of those, please.

Here's a thing about prawns - we used to be banned from eating prawns at work in case we got food poisoning and killed ourselves and several hundred people. Bout 3 years ago work changed the rules - they said food hygeine these days means you are as likely to get food poisoning from salad as you are from prawns, and they can't ban us from eating everything. This means either prawns are OK or the whole of catering at work is up the creek (airline food! ) I ate prawns while I was pregnant.

PS Mr Cluck has sent me a cryptic FB message about his batteries being charged and ready for tonight. Yesterday he said he was having a night off. Does he know something Clucky doesn't?

Interesting to know boxerbeat I think a MW would have to err on the side of caution when giving advice in case someone did get sick when they had said it was ok. you know how peopleate with current blame culture. But I will probably be ignoring it and just make sure they are very fresh and home made.

Sounds like MrCluck is sharing too much info Boxer. Poor lad has been at it every night for last 3 weeks and can't hack the pace

Bitey - that's my meal for tonight....have abstained from nothing in this pregnancy and come from the everything in moderation school of thought. Haven't had any oysters mind but then haven't wanted them either.

You lucky bugger Kate! I tried a bit of saint agur on a cracker earlier and it tasted foul, I'm only 17 weeks so maybe my taste buds still have the arse? I am unwilling to waste money on a fillet steak if it makes me want to hurl! Will keep testing this

I'm watching monday's OBEM, nit enjoying the freak outs, can we have more if the serene births pliz?

Sorry about the x post owlie lovely heart beat nws and so gorgeous that you could record it!

Thanks for swimming info rocket I bloody hate crawl legs so very good news!

Sorry if I missed anyone am on iPod again

boxy hope that wasn't me you were referring to about teasing - I was just trying to cheer up Drom by looking at the pros of a cs. Obviously near-death experiences kind of out-weigh that minor flappy detail. No offence intended.

Clucks you have been the most chilled-out overdue person I've ever heard in my life

muser Glad you are back home!

Gin sounds like you and minigin are doing fantastically. You are still a DHB in my book.

Yey to all those lovely hbs - I've been trying to resist using my doppler to the point where i break it but I am so much happier knowing it's there if I 'need' it.

I had breaded prawns for lunch yesterday. I luffs prawns. Can't stomach strong cheese at the moment though. Only cravings I have are for salt and vinegar crisps which I can't get over here

Milano, Gin, Lozza, GG & Rocket I am VERY grateful for all the planned c-sec positive stories. I am a great big scaredy-cat about the operation, but very much looking forward to the whole meeting lovely baby bit.

Gin particularly useful news on lack of need for full Hollywood - and so nice to hear all is going ok.

Muse Good lord, you're back quickly! Congrats, pet!

Am sure am missing people out, but posting on phone...exciting times in the Deli!

drom I've seen evidence out there which suggests an elcs is actually "safer" for both parties than a vaginal birth. Fuck the lentil-weavers, you want a healthy baby and a positive experience also includes the mother not being ripped in to shreds and delirious with pain and fear. Anyway, to atone for offending the lentil-weavers you can eat organic rice for a year. It's a bit like saying 5 Hail Mary's really.

I ate raw prawns when I was pregnant. I believe prawns are one of those foods which are frequently irradiated these days and as the majority are flown in from cess-pits operating on the coast of South-East Asian you'd want them nuked really...

Morning ladeez!

Owly, Rocket glad you both had good MW appointments & got to hear HB. Good idea recording it for t'other half, didn't think of that. I was too engrossed in grinning like a fool & saying "Oh My God" over & over

Thankfully I don't like fish. Any fish. End of. So no worries about me eating prawns. They may taste nice, but I remember my dad teasing when we were young, & holding a prawn & making it "wriggle" in his fingers then pretending to eat it live. I was so horrified I've never eaten one.

Of course the downside of not eating fish is I'm as thick as pig-shit .

I went to see a psychic last night for entertainment purposes. Twas muchos hilarious. Not a 1 to 1 consultation, more a crowded hall as psychic stood at front eyes closed saying, "I have an old man here. He has smelly feet......". I sat with my sister, mum & 2 Nana's giggling like school girls & munching on a left over from Christmas bar of Baileys chocolate. Much fun.

Anyhoo, thank Crunchie its Friday - I'm knackered, & am looking forward to a weekend in pj's.

I did it....I finally, fucking did it!!!!

Baby chick arrived at 5:47 this morning in fantastic natural-home-hypno-waterbirth with candles and everything. He is totally gorgeous - am completely smitten and overwhelmed with the fabulousness of it all.

Full story to follow in the Spa once I've come down from cloud 9.

Yey-hooooooo! Thrilled for you kate sounds like you had the perfect birth. Hello little chickadee

yeyeyeyeyeyeyeyey!

woohoo! fabulous news, Kate, and hurrah for getting the birth you wanted! Can't wait to see pics of him!

OMG! Congratuations Clucks that sounds like a fabulous delivery. Welcome to the world, Tinychick