Feb 2011-Final,final stretch!!

[Grannyapple]

Hi ladies-thought I would be adventurous & set up the new thread for the final leg of our journey

i am really nervous now tbh.Just had a "discussion" with dh as the weekend thatpil are coming down whiuch will be the weekend of the 5th he now thinks his sister will be bloody coming too and mentioned her bringing her boyfriend-young lad,ive met him twice,i told him hes got no bloody chance and i still cqnt believe they all assume they can stay here,so rude.It makes it worse that nobody has asked me how i am,i feel like im just delivering the goods!

Seriously ledkr that's so unfair, where are they all supposed to stay. Sils boyfriend is practically a stranger!!! No, No, No, shout, tell him you'll go with baby and spend weekend at friends'. You do not need this right now. PS Once I stop shouting on your behalf, can't believe things are now moving so fast. Keep breathing and think of how fantastic this coming weekend is going to be xxx

ledkr you need to put your foot down! I always find DH listens a bit more when I say "I can't cope"

I forgot to tell you all about my embarassing DM yesterday!

We went to the soft play centre with DS and we saw DMs friends daughter there and her DDs. This friend was with a few other Mums but DM decided that we were to sit with them whilst DC played So we sit down. One of the other Mum's DS comes over crying - must have been around 12 months as just walking and a bit wobbly and DM says to mother "Gosh he's ENORMOUS isn't he?" and continues to say how he must be heavier than DS (2.7yrs) etc and how the Mum must have a bad back from carrying him etc etc etc she just kept going - SO rude! If someone had kept banging on about how huge my DC was I would prob be a bit annoyed?! I did kind of give a "Sorry" look to the other Mum! How embarassing!

ledkr yikes have you even got room for all those people? Not that that's the main point of course, but you hardly need a houseful of people (especially some you hardly know!) sleeping on floors etc. when you've got a newborn and are feeling somewhat 'post-operative'. I would be putting my foot down! Time to get shouty and wiggles idea of suggesting you might be driven to abduct your own the baby to get some peace is a good one.

I sort of have the opposite problem with PIL, well not FIL, he is just completely uninterested which is fine. MIL is very excited and I know will dote on her first DGC (and has already signed up for unpaid childcare bless her), but is also doing a very martyr-ish act at the moment about not coming around or having much to do with baby as she doesn't want to get in our way etc. I know she is trying to say she will come as much as we want her to and no more, but in my ever so slightly irritable state, I am finding the martyrdom irritating (Yes I ABU!). Thing is, MIL is lovely, but we're not at all alike, and because of that we're not really properly 'close', so it's the not the kind of relationship where I can just say 'don't be such a drama queen' as I would to my own Mum!

But anyway, I should be grateful really, it's A LOT easier than having to put up with PILs and family intruding and staying over so early on. I'm feeling a little Victor Meldrewish that they actually think that's OK TBH!

Maybe you could emphasise how much you don't need houseguests by drawing up a list of chores for each of them (as after all, surely they have come to help you)!

D

ledkr - I can't believe the cheek of your DH's family (especially as they don't seem to be the helpful type).

I told my mother she was welcome to visit after the baby is born so she looked at airfares in October, decided she didn't want to travel alone so asked my sister to come (fine), then AFTER they'd booked flights, told me her sister/my aunt is coming as well. I didn't mind at the time but now I'm starting to feel a bit overwhelmed at the thought of 3 extra people in the house and coping with a new baby. At least they'll be helpful around the house and not expect to be waited on.

I've been absolutely roasting the past two weeks. I've had to switch to a summer duvet, even with the heating off and no clothing at night, I sweat with a 2.5tog duvet. I was stripped down to a vest top a couple days ago while DH was wrapped in a blanket on the sofa.

PDR that reminds me of how I accidently offended someone once - was collecting clothes from someone locally that I had brought from ebay and the lady answered the door with her baby so I asked how old he was and she said something like '1month' to which I responded 'wow, he's massive' . So didn't mean to be rude and it came out all wrong [foot in mouth emoticon]. SHe looked a bit at me and said he was in 3 - 6 month clothes already.

ledkr ban them. Ban them all

Feeling very this pm - have decided my tummy upsets are tummy squished and IBS mixed together but am finding the incredible loud non stop bathroom men too much for me and have just found out my grandad is being rushed to hospital ill and am all teary and worried and just not coping.

thanks for the support its hard to find perspective tbh,dh will want to show off his first child of course but its the assunption that annoys me,if they offered to get a b and b i,d probably say it's ok. I will NOT be having the boyfriend even to visit,with my saggy belly and big sanitary towell.
A little aibu just on this thread but the spitefull naughty side of me thinks it will be fun to show them its not right,such as taking baby up to my room for a nap (got freeview remember) my friends and family still popping in,and asking dh to take them out for a bit as its all "too much"
They will have to bring their own lilos and bedding i suppose but tbh the thought of all their stuff and noise and chatter and staying up late and constant eating does fill me with horror.I am certainly not having it the following weekend as well.
Bloody bastards putting me thru this.

Just want to add my two pence regarding sleep from the breastfeeding camp! I got more sleep than a lot of my friends as a breastfeeding co-sleeper. I didn't even have to wake up properly and sit up in order to feed my DD when she woke at night, just pulled her in a bit closer and latched her on, then resumed dozing! Whereas if I had formula fed there would have been trips to the kitchen and preparation etc. Breastfeeding also releases loads of lovely sleepy hormones too.

ledkr really hoping you get some peace soon - you've enough to worry about without all this added stress

angels really sorry you are feeling so grotty and hope that your grandad is ok. [hugs]

tee hee just realised that dh is having to work just one day on sat the 12th which is the next weekend,therefore am def not having anyone to stay as hes not here so my friend will be,good oppotunity to learn about booking into accomodation if they still wish to visit,they dont know yet that ds3 has moved back home as split with gf thus no spare room so hopefully they will be put off without all the comforts they normally enjoy.
witch like cackles

ledkr maybe you should set up camp with the baby in your room and get DH to bring all food and drink up to you in bed while you get to know the LO and everyone else sits drumming their fingers getting bored and then maybe they'll go home early or do lots of cleaning/cooking for you.

Just had the delivery of the moses basket - hurrah - something to cheer me up (thanks sbf for the hug)

angels sorry,being very self obsessed now.What is up with gpa?Is dh there with you?You are bound to be more emotional,have a little cry and then have a nice bath,remember your bp,you dont want it going up,get regular updates on gpa so you dont worry.

angels sorry to hear about GPa and also that you're feeling poorly as well. It all happens at once doesn't it? I had seen your IBS thread on pg but had nothing useful to say so didn't reply but thought I'd come here and sympathise instead.

As ledkr advises, probably better to have a little cry, it does honestly help. I presume no bath though as annoying bathroom men around? Sounds like duvet might be the answer?

D

ledkr if only I could have a nice bath - I have the bathroom men over creating havoc in there pulling away plaster from the walls as I write this! They don't know what's wrong with gpa but think pneumonia maybe - he's in his mid 90's and I've just got a bad feeling about it . DH should be home soon, not that he's that good when it comes to these things.

Moses basket stand is a flat pack and beyond my little brain concentration so have left the fun for DH when he comes home.

I feel sooooooooo hungry yet tummy ache every time I eat

actually,i think that we have periods,pregnancy and childbirth to suffer so a woman should never have to assemble flat pack furniture.

Oh angels I'm so sorry about your grandpa, hope he gets the right treatment and soon, hugs x
WRT the IBS, are you taking any probiotics? Might be worth a try..

ledkr wow, do your ILs know the first thing about having a baby? I understand they are excited and that's lovely but seriously! Maybe you could write DH a to-do list for after the birth as you won't be able to do things and he might realise just how busy HE'S going to be and out them off.

*angels8 My gma is in her 90s and a couple of weeks ago had a fall and ended up in hospital and then a nursing home,we couldnt visit for a bit either cos of the snow,she is home now but not brilliant,i have been unable to see her as she has a cold/cough but am going to go tmw briefly.It is hard cos you keep thinking the worst and know that it will spoil things if the worst happen (not in a selfish way) but hard to be happy if other things are sad.

angels hope your GPa is ok xxx

Just back from hosp and all well - BP down to 138/80 which is low for me these days but apparently still borderline?!? Got to go back next Monday now. Measuring 38 weeks (am 36+3) so not too bad not sure why consultant is predicting such a whopper! I've still only gained 2.5kg. Had ++sugar in my urine but MW didn't seem worried... It's the first time so far so maybe something I ate.

needto its my own fault i should have been clear from the start.Dh is very close to his family so very hard,i just think they are so rude,intrusive and selfish just presuming they can stay here.And then especially bringing sil.I seriously cannot imagine it will go well tho my hormones will be raging nd my tolerence low,dh will feel uncomfortable and hopefully realise i was right all along and they will either hate me or realise their mistake and think again.
tbh the fact that sil is with them will prob make them leave early as she will want to get home sunday for her dp,dog and get ready for work.Make a change from the usual 7pm on Sunday sill sat here awaiting "dinner" when ive done a roast at lunch

needto have you seen "Look at this?"

ledkr you poor thing! I am now starting to see the bright side of living in a poky basement flat in which no relative would want to stay even for a night. What is the prob with in-laws? They all seem to be awful in their own way. My fil came to visit on Sunday with his new partner, who everyone hates, and she repeatedly took me aside to tell me 'I can sense your anxiety' and that I really needed to relax and stop worrying. I barely know the woman and from what I do know, find her to be completely without empathy and one of the stupidest people I've ever known! I can laugh at her, just about, but really don't appreciate her making me wonder if I might be deeply anxious, when I was feeling pretty OK about things...

Hi girls

angels hope your gpa is ok, big hugs to you.

ledkr just ask dh if he would want your family coming to stay for a week after he had surgery. It's not just childbirth here, how would he like to be entertaining a few days after a vasectomy?

pdr glad bp is down, fingerscrissed it will stay there.

I had mw appt at home today to book in homebirth - although have just found out my local hosp have opened a birthing unit so am going to have a look around soon just to be nisey!

40 is that PRUH that's opened a birthing unit? If so, please give me the low down :)

I meant nosey!

Baby is head down but not engaged although that's to be expected this time round.

It's nearly February though, how exciting! And I still have 4.3 weeks to go!

Oh and not only is dh on a stag do this week but also planning a business trip up north the following week. Seriously, it will be as miracle if he is here for the birth!

Mil asked me the other day if I thought I would go I to labour w/c 7Feb (2 wks early) as she wants to visit her mum who lives a few hours away. How the feck do I know!!!? And my dsis is going to Spain for half term so might as well have this one at the womens refuge