The great PESH dispenser

[Muser]

Here we go again:

BESH BAYBEES

dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.
Silversky, boy, born Nov 1
SomethingSuitablyWitty, girl born Nov 2
okiecokie, girl, born Nov 12
Honeymoo, boy, born Nov 11
ReginaMonologue, boy, born Nov 13
Maswera, boy, born Dec 24
PollyPoo, girl, born Jan 5?
MrsFC, boy, born Jan 7

UPDIFFED

ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 Jan
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24
Muser, blooming at last, due February 27
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Medee, has a deceptive bump, due March 12
Casserole, completely out of witty things to add, due April 8
Scorpette, now carrying a RL baby in addition to Clothilda and the squid, due 18th May.
Laurielou, the unmarried hussy with the "surprise" diff, due 31 May (ish)
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 1 June.
TwinkleToes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 20 June.
Orchid, hoping for a zen like child, due 1st July
Ginfox, loving the new mega-boobs, due 12th July.
LadyGoneGaga, Has lost her waist, due 24 July
Ivegotmrbitey, Marmite is a lovely name for a baybee, due 27th July.

Oooh, all this pampering - it sounds amaze. I had vouchers for Xmas off some fab friend's for a differs massage. Will book in soon........

I bet you look GORGEOUS Muse. I love your hair

But pliz not to "swissssh" your hair like that daft bint on TV advert.

Gorgeousness for free - because you're worth it, Muse I has seen pics - it really does look AMAZE!

(What is this here blog?)

Know what you mean loz it's to do with the increased blood flow, ahem, apparently

Luffly hair muse I am probably going to bottle having anything drastic done on Friday as its not somewhere I have had my hair cut before. Although I am having urges to get the chop again think I am just going to enjoy the treatments.

I have just been to the Traff for an hour and my back started to twinge. It is DEFINITELY walking (esp. shopping) that does it as I've been doing yoga and swimming and pottering round the house with no probs. Weird. Must be my wobbley differs gait.

Walking does my back in too, Rocket - is defo differ's gait.

Well, inspired by youse lot, I have given myself a mini-spa at home: long shower with poshest shower gels, Elemis face mask, smothered torso in Mama Mio belly rub cream, contorted self to slather feet in foot cream and put old socks on, etc., etc. Bloody marvellous - and my headache has lifted a bit too. Pampering is totally the way forward

Oooh, Scorps, Meds and Muse proving inspirational...nearest thing I've come to a spa recently is calling the boyf into the bathroom to exfoliate my feet last week, and spending about 15 minutes of heightened anxiety this afternoon jabbing at my nether regions with hairdressing scissors trying to tame my bush, by mirror and feeling I need arm extensions to get round bump. Baby might stand a chance of breaching the Sleeping Beauty levels of dense foliage round the hoohoo when it deigns to come out!

Muse, was it that fangled Brazilian keratin hair treatment you had? Your hair looks fab, and I am a curly girl....was considering having it straightened before baby arrives so I don't spend the next few months looking like the wild woman of wonga, as I'm guessing my straightening opportunities will be limited.

Cho, you've just made me spit my peppermint tea everywhere with laughter! 'Sleeping Beauty levels of dense foliage around the hoohoo' - I'm the same; we is Snatch Sistahs!

(That sounds even more wrong than I actually intended it to)

My MW pal says they always prefer to see a full-on Joy of Sex-esque bush when wimminz is a-laying as it's more hygienic :)

Muse, btw that was a virtual luffly hair as I haven't actually seen it, have sent you a request via tother place just so i can stalk have a look. How was the afternoon tea? I have been craving fruit scones and clotted cream all afternoon!

cho I have given up on weed whacking already so god only knows what sort of state my undergrowth will be in by laying time (am I bothered?) We might need to send in Bruce Parry to investigate the pigmys living down there. I take it you aren't getting any 'signs' then?

score your homemade pamper sounds lovely.

No signs Rocklobster , pant beard was getting beyond a joke though...not trying to keep it at bay for benefit of the midwife, but (and this is a troofact) because I have needed to start sleeping in my knickers because my pubes are keeping me awake tickling the tops of my thighs:) I AM NOT JOKING, BTW!!!

Liking being snatch sisters, Scorps...how about 'twat twins'?

I'm so glad I get mine waxed!

Although I'm not having thigh-tickling ishoos (yet)... so maybe more like 'clunge cousins'?

Too far?

Cho it wasn't Brazilian system but similar. This one has no formaldehyde or derivatives of same in it, so much gentler on hair. Hairdresser was trialing it to see what sort of results it gives so they can decide whether to start offering it. I am to report back on upkeep.

Right now it seems lovely, but we shall see after a wash and what not. It's meant to last for 12 weeks with hair gradually returning to normal. Certainly to start I ought to be able to just wash it, rough dry it, and look like I've had a professional spend hours smoothing it.

Went for evening tea at Harrods afterwards, with a friend. Was very nice. Am full of amazing cake.

I invested in some trimmers when the vag snot started sticking my pubes together - tres uncomfortable when wiping, I can tell you!!!

Last time I attempted some epilation cream to tidy-up the area at 38 weeks.....LC was 2 weeks late so I was sporting attractive 4 weeks growth for the dishy doc when he pulled her out with the forceps. Was mortified

This time have got the waxing done so should look presentable for when this baby arrives.

Cho - are you sitting there wondering whether every twinge, ache or movement could be the start of something??? No??? Just me then...

Ok, who is on OBEM duty?

well, that was some sneeze!

Am here! Was that first lay a back-to-back without pain relief? Brave gal!

My heart stopped waiting for that baby to cry.

God, me too! Why has my internet connection chosen NOW to go slow?!

Awww, that partner of the blonde woman is really supportive.

not sure about back to back, but it was certainly quick. Liking control lady's partner.

x-post. My internet and laptop have fallen out again. So mostly lurking via phone.

not sure about back to back, but it was certainly quick. Liking control lady's partner.

fucksticks. I give up

They just said 'she was 'ere a couple of hours; had a bath then went 'ome'. Sounds good to me!

This other bloke with the glasses and the wise-cracks is pissing me off a little bit. Obviously larfin' it up for the cameras.

Much as I love TYF, I know he'll be silent and terrified throughout my laying. Bit like baybee's conception then, HURHUR.

Hey, Muse, do they offer that silky hair treatment for pubes? Quite a few bushy PESHes needing it, it seems

Aw, poor woman.