The great PESH dispenser

[Muser]

Here we go again:

BESH BAYBEES

dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.
Silversky, boy, born Nov 1
SomethingSuitablyWitty, girl born Nov 2
okiecokie, girl, born Nov 12
Honeymoo, boy, born Nov 11
ReginaMonologue, boy, born Nov 13
Maswera, boy, born Dec 24
PollyPoo, girl, born Jan 5?
MrsFC, boy, born Jan 7

UPDIFFED

ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 Jan
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24
Muser, blooming at last, due February 27
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Medee, has a deceptive bump, due March 12
Casserole, completely out of witty things to add, due April 8
Scorpette, now carrying a RL baby in addition to Clothilda and the squid, due 18th May.
Laurielou, the unmarried hussy with the "surprise" diff, due 31 May (ish)
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 1 June.
TwinkleToes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 20 June.
Orchid, hoping for a zen like child, due 1st July
Ginfox, loving the new mega-boobs, due 12th July.
LadyGoneGaga, Has lost her waist, due 24 July
Ivegotmrbitey, Marmite is a lovely name for a baybee, due 27th July.

Nakedness all the way. Clothes are just annoying IMO.

No Curls, I'm a refugee from down south.

Unfortunately Mr Fox is very good at the puppy-dog eyes when I've said something to hurt his feelings. But on the big day I suspect that will only wind me up even more. Presumably being presented with first-born will help him to forget

My Judgey Pants explode with delight! Top telly, is BFGW. I was too about the contraception idiocy, BTW.

I can confirm that unlike the gal on OBEM, I will not be wearing a sexy, fashionable bikini top if I get my water birth (or probably ever again in any situation, come to think of it ).

Meant to say summat about earlier - at one point I was waiting in a corridor. There was the hugest preggo I've ever seen pacing about nearby. She was not only obese but prob. having twins. Her enormo-belly was hanging out of her t-shirt near my face and I swear her waist measurement was easily as big as my height. But she had NOT ONE STRETCHMARK How is that even fair?!

Can we place bets on PoolSister fainting? She is looking very pale under that fake tan.

Pool-girl's sister is hilarious. Will she puke or faint first?

And given how calm and quiet PoolGirl is being it's even more hilarious.

BFGW? Am I being fick?

at stretch marks. Mine are starting to fade, thankfully. But I still look like a wonky zebra with crinkly tits (have very much shrunk again in that area).

foxy I am the opposite - an ex-pat in England-shire. I made my husband cry during labour.

Big Fat Gyspy Wedding! yes, I was being fick.

Pool-girl is a legend, and my new role model. Also hoping my rack looks that good in a bikini in a few months (or ever).

I hate wimminz wot look fab 'n' glam when laying. Can I pre-warn everyone who knows me on FB about how rank I WILL look in my first holding-the-baby photos? My hair already looks like Captain Cavemaaaaaaan after I've spent 20 mins styling it and am prone to a sweaty face, so take pity on me when the time comes

Oh that was amazing. Amazing. I want one of those births. How do I order one?

I know it was heavily edited, but pool-births all round I think?

scorps my FB first holding-the-baby photo is post-shower and change. SFF has/had one of me naked in delivery room which was banned from the public eye.

Yes please, Mr Doctor Man (or Mrs Doctor Lady), I will has one of them there water birfs, thank you please. That didn't look bad at all! (Although did anyone else see a floater at the edge of the pool heheh?!) PoolGirl's Sis is a ledge. Love her puking when they said the head was out!

There will be no public photos of me until I've had a clean up. Hell no.

It might be worth noting that we have yet to have a planned home or water birth in the ESH community. Which surely makes the odds better for you all?

score she's got your fan!

Casp, will I be allowed to take my GHDs in to sort out my fringe? Yes, I know it's stupid to have a straight fringe when my hair is wavy, but meh. I actually took some pics of me weeping with joy over my BFP but I looked so heinous I've never even shown TYF!

I have my priorities straight, as you can see.

And can I wear my glasses during labour? Or will I not want to, IYKWIM.

God that hospital food looks rank. Remind me not to go to hospital until I'm about ready to push.

Although Casp, the PESH track record on births isn't great is it? I hope we start bucking the trend now.

I have taken agin this woman for her "I felt so healthy in pregnancy" comment. Bet she doesn't have piles.

I want me a pool birth! And those breasts butnot the baby father or fainty sis! D'you think she was a hyppo birther? So calm and mellow! Fdh has insisted on changing channels so will have watch the rest later, but have cheered up a bit about whole laying thing!

at straighteners. You're not supposed to plug stuff in on wards (says me who ended up with phone/laptop etc hooked up). But there was a hairdryer in the tv room . Good on you if you have the energy post birth. It's hard enough to wash yourself.

I thought there'd be no way I could wear my contacts in labour - expected scrunching of eyes to pop them out - but ended up preferring them to my glasses. Mind you, my specs are very loose and always fall off (I have stupidly small ears). You definitely don't want to go through it all blind. But if you need to bury your head in TYF/the bed/the pool you might want to pop them off.

Yeah, that caaah stole me fan! Mr Darcy will never ask for that important second dance now!

Ha, as soon as that bloke put his feet up on the birthing ball, I thought 'take yer bloody shoes off'. I like this woman

Water births for all!

PS That hossie meal is making me glad I have allergies. Rank.

I am trialing a permanent blowdry thing next week. A non-chemically one obviously. I am hoping it will give me gorgeous hair for the next 12 weeks. Then I won't need to worry about my GHDs.

I think she's in a minority Muse - don't know anyone who felt healthier whilst diffed.

Tendayi is going to punch her husband before the end. Defo.

I have poncey Chanel specs and don't do well with lenses - will have to get used to blind-batness I might buy some cheapy ones actually, as I know how all babies have an obsession with grabbing glasses off people's faces.

Bitch stole my fan AND has felt super-healthy? It's not right.