The PESH in a manger

[LadyGoneGaga]

No booze for our heads,
No clubbing, no Class A's,
No more pants of red

The midwives in the hossie,
Looked down where we lay,
A bunch of old, evil hags,
Fucked on Gas and A.

Ho, ho, ho you bunch of Hoes.

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.
Silversky, boy, born Nov 1
SomethingSuitablyWitty, girl born Nov 2
okiecokie, girl, born Nov 12
Honeymoo, boy, born Nov 11
ReginaMonologue, boy, born Nov 13

UPDIFFED

maswera, can't possibly be having a baybee next week, due December 11
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25
MrsFC, joining whether she wants to or not, due 22 Jan
ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 Jan
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24
Muser, blooming at last, due February 27
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Medee, finally over the Haribo craving, due March 12
Casserole, completely out of witty things to add, due April 8
Scorpette, now carrying a RL baby in addition to Clothilda and the squid, due 18th May.
Laurielou, the unmarried hussy with the "surprise" diff, due 31 May (ish)
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 1 June.
Twinkle Toes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 23 June.
LadyGoneGaga, Compulsive Stick pisser, due 28 July

Yaaay, that's fab news, GG! You can start relaxing more now, eh? Top stuff. So, so pleased for you

My norks were unbearably itchy (and sore) for the first trimester and still get pretty itchy at times, Bitey. Fairly par for the course, I reckon.

Gorgeous news ladybakingpotatoes what direction were you out? Are we now diff twins? Glad you mentioned the prune juice, that was the next is it normal question!

scorps my sister was preggers in Australia during the swine flu pan/epi demic. Her Dr's advice was to not put your hands anywhere near your face or near anything that might go in your mouth unless you were sure they were clean. And alcohol gel is for last resort and nothing beats hot soap and water. Sounds like a recipe for OCD if you ask me, but my sis said it just made her concentrate her mind on avoiding lift buttons and door handles etc.

hot water and soap even

X-post! Glad all is well with you and your deceptive bump, Medee :) And it's so encouraging that the NHS seem as clueless as ever re: the Anti-D issue! Still, you've had it now, so huzzah!

Do check the labels, first, Bitey, but many of them say "made with pasteurised milk".

No, other way Bitey but she says can be a couple days either side so she reckons to just go with my dates as I was charting.

Have to admit I used to cheat horribly with soft cheeses. It's only listeria which is incredibly rare and don't think there has been a single documented case of it actually causing any probs in pregnancy. The French don't avoid it.

I'm more concerned about the rare meat/salami from the Toxoplasmosis angle but only cos lovely Spilt from my other fred lost her baby at 20 weeks due to Toxo. Might ask midwife if they will test me as no need to avoid if you are immune which one third of pop are.

Hello all!
Sorry you didn't get your appointment bitey, hopefully we can answer your questions. I'm sure you would rather your MW was safe than driving in these conditions. I had itchy norks too. And great that you don't have to work.

Great news on your scan LG, it's really a real baby in there!! Lovely lovely news.

I'm not having the flu jab, for a number of reasons, but mainly: I haven't had a bad cold in three years, and so I think my immune system is pretty hardcore, and I really don't want to mess with it; and I heard once that the virus could mutate to become resistant to the jab if too many people have it, so I think I shouldn't have it so it stays effective for the more at risk.

CHeers, Bitey, but I am basically OCD about hygiene already and that advice is how I've been about public stuff all my life. It wouldn't even occur to me to put my hands on food or near my mouth if they weren't scrupulously clean anyway (you can see why me and MIL get on so well ). I have a handgel (organic, not chemical - it was voted the best for killing germs) and a saline nasal spray that kills germs too and tote those around with me like a loon whenever I'm out and about now I'm pg, so I should be OK.

LGG, the French don't avoid soft cheeses in pg because they grow up eating unpasteurised cheese and therefore build up an immunity, so we can't compare Brit chances of getting ill from it to theirs. But I agree with not worrying too much about it. I've eaten hot pasteurised and unpasteurised goat's cheeses and cold pasteurised goat's cheese and been fine. I don't like deli meats, so am okay there.

Hooray for scan LGG!!!!

Hooray for itchy nips bitey!!

Boo to teasing baby mas tho I imagine things may well have kicked off now....

And kudos to pol on da secks. No longer believe in it myself tbh :)

I am not denying myself much this Xmas, as can't really think of anything that I will want that I can't have at least a bit of. Obviously I can't get legless but am not remotely bovvered about that (although it would be good pain relief

I grew up eating unpasteurised cheese. And mud

Also, at the risk of sounding like a nob, I am happy to give up EVERYTHING if I had to this Xmas as it is all a reminder of how different things are this year. I mean, last year started out with me not being able to have more than a glass of wine etc, but after Xmas day I could (and did) drink myself stupid.... I know which I would prefer.

muse well done on boots. I have the opposite problem, skinny legs and huge feet (picture a golf club and you're close.) I pull on some sexy calf-hugging knee-highs and they generally look like wellies or old socks.

Oh, and I may not be having the flu jab as I have entirely forgotten to make the decision whether to have it or not. Which is a mature and well-informed approach obviously

In my defence I've had a lot to think about of late...

Cpngrates again GG what a lovely xmas pressie!! I didn't know it was toxo that caused Splits MC. :-( I might have a rethink on that salami. Anyway, it'll prob only cause me pain so I'll just stick to grapes and dates and a bit of cheese which is just as delish. Plus I get to gorge of smoked salmon mmmmmm.

bitey itchy sore nips here still at 16 weeks. Its comes and goes now tho. I also had this really bizarre very localized itching just under my boobs, from the bottom of my bra to a couple of inches down. Plus on a few square inches on the front of my shins. Odd but rather amusing.

Ribs still bad then gin ? :-(

Gin, even if I had been warned off it, I'd probably have forgotten to book one anyway!

Am so happy this Xmas is going to be so fab for you (and you all), after last year's hell. You don't sound daft at all, just entirely wise about everything. You might be sober with wonky ribs, but you'll have a fab time

I have parsnip legs - skinny then the last few inches are really big. Same goes for my arms. Mind you, the rest of my figure obeys no known rule for what body shapes women are supposed to have, apart from my norks, so heyho. I once read that Trinny and Susannah book about the 20 possible body shapes laydeez could have and I didn't resemble any of them (not that I would follow their rules, I hasten to add; someone had bought it MIL for Xmas t'other yr and I was bored). I need Shape no. 21: Teen hermaphrodite with abnormal leg length.

Rocket, I have random localised itching too (also under comedy zeppelin tits and shins). Can we have smoked salmon? I thought it was a no-no. Bloody hell, that's the best news I've had all day - Crimbo ain't Crimbo without an indulgent smoked salmon brekkie!

The meals me and TYF have planned for Xmas Day will probably make me put on all my pg weight in 24 hours!

(Me: 'we can't have pavlova AND yule log AND ice-cream AND apple pie all in one day'. Him (tall, 11 stone and built like a whippet): 'Why not?' PS We both hate Xmas pud)

How funny score glad I am not the only one.

Yes, apparently the thing with raw fish is that it has little worms in it that unless killed off which unless cooked can make you sick. But the smoking process does this as does freezing for 24 hrs. As long as this is done then sushi is ok as well. Most sushi restaurants will do this as a matter of course with the fish they will serve but obv best to check before hand. I was also very happy to find this out recently! We always have smoked salmon on brown bread and butter with a glass of bubbly just before sitting down. Its one of the traditions I really love and as I can't go too balls deep on the other more fatty xmas treats I am planning on filling my boots!! :o

Opps, sorry must proof read better, first fish related sentence went a bit, well, fishy?

Still here, still fed up :( Had a particularly bad night of v painful contractions about every 30-40 mins. Reached the end of my rope at about 3am & got DP to phone the maternity unit to see if there was anything they would do to speed things up or relieve the pain. "Have a bath" they said. I took the phone off him and wailed down it for about 10 mins basically begging them to do something. "Take some codeine" was the most helpful. "It's latent labour, it's what happens". Seriously, these people must have had some serious SAS-style not-relenting-in-the-face-of-torture training... I have my term + 10 appt tomorrow & I called up this afternoon to book in for an induction on Weds morning - don't particularly want to be induced but I just can't do this any longer than that.

I think in the UK they're legally required to do the sushi freezing thing. So FSA says you can chow down if it's from a reputable place.

I too would be wary of things possibly causing toxo after being on the March thread with spilt. She was due a few days before me.

Also, am slightly freaked out by soft scoop icecream as someone on the pregnancy after miscarriage thread got salmonella. Baby absolutely fine, but she has been sick for ages. I believe the latest was waking up to find herself bleeding from the eyeballs. Nobody was eating were they? Grimtastic. Made me think twice about McFlurrys, I can tell you.

I know the chances of it happening to anyone are tiny. So don't freak out unnecessarily people. It hasn't put me off poached eggs, on account of them being vaccinated and all.

Cross posting mas, poor thing. Sounds awful. I will be hoping it's all over soon for you, with lovely drugs and a gorgeous baby. Have a glass of wine.

Oh mas that sounds grim, you poor thing. I hope things pick up very fast for you or you have a better night tonight and can get some rest. :( Have some cake to go with the wine.

muse What do you mean vaccinated? I haven't had a poached egg since I got diffed, does that mean I can?!!!!

The full advice is to only have properly cooked eggs rocket. However, lion stamped eggs come from chickens that have been vaccinated against salmonella. While that doesn't remove all the risk, it removes enough that I will eat poached eggs if they're lion stamped and fresh. Depends how cautious you are.

Personally I think stuff like poorly frozen icecream is more of a salmonella risk than an eggy. So I'll eat my eggs, and steer clear of the McFlurries.

I've never had a McFlurry so don't know what I'm missing. :o

I'll probably stick to scrambled anyway, suits the slatternly turn my cooking has taken recently (easiest is best!) but thanks for the info. I've also become quite obsessed with washing my hands after handling eggs as apparently you are more likely to pick it up from the egg shell rather than the actual egg.

Oh, poor Mas That sounds horrible. I'm sure the MU deal with lots of wimminz with the same thing, but their cheerily dismissive tone doesn't help, does it? You just need someone to say 'Yes, I'll take it all way'. I just wish someone could

oh, Mas, that sounds tough.