I wandered lonely as a PESH

[Muser]

That floats on high o'er vales and hills
When all at once I saw a crowd
Of cackling, quaffing, ne-er-do-wells

Pull up a seat, grap a glass of vino and a piece of sushi, it's Delitime again.

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.
Silversky, boy, born Nov 1
SomethingSuitablyWitty, awaiting update

UPDIFFED
Honeymoo, 3 wees a night, due October 31 (boy)
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November 14
ReginaMonologue, knows when all the sales are, due November 20 (boy)
maswera, jungle hottie, due December 11
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25
MrsFC, joining whether she wants to or not, due 22 Jan
ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 Jan
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24
Muser, will she ever stop puking?, due February 27
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Medee, finally over the Haribo craving, due March 12
Casserole, completely out of witty things to add, due April 8
Scorpette, now carrying a RL baby in addition to Clothilda and the squid, due 21 May.
Laurielou, the unmarried hussy with the "surprise" diff, due 31 May (ish)
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 1 June.
Twinkle Toes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 23 June.

ap this time last year I was on a weekend away, thinking the droid had arrived (implantation bleed), with a dodgy belly, dodgy skin rash and general low immunity. Even thought I had a hangover from a couple of Coronas... But, quelle suprise, I was a differ.

Hee hee... Going to be preggers a while longer alpy! More plug this morning after a fairly restless night of tossing and turning. I'm not sure if plug is as good a sign as a show with blood but it's definitely a good sign. I'm thinking if no go today tomorrow's rummage with me might do it. But for tonight, x factor!!!

With mw not me!

Honey I reckon you are having us all on. That is really a cushion up your top isn't it?

moo! You're not supposed to be here!
I was incredibly restless overnight before I woke up with the show. I just felt really weird, but nothing I could pinpoint/describe, and I even considered getting up at 4am to do some housework (better late than never with the nesting instinct!).

Was it that sort of restlessness or could you just not get comfy?

If your plug has come out MW will have plenty to rummage in!

Moo will you buggar off here & lay a baybee pliz

Can I have a self indulgent moan? The MW appointment yesterday was the biggest waste of time ever. I sat in the waiting room & my name plus MIDWIFE in flashing letters, accompanied by a fanfare of trumpets (OK, it was more a little beep) flash up on the screen in the waiting room. Well, that's one way to announce it! Thank Jebus no-one I knew was there. MW said that she's not the regular MW, but she's just heard regular MW is leaving so she doesn't know who my MW will be. Then she asked when would be a suitable time for me to register . Eh, now you daft bint. But apparently they come to your house for about an hour. The only good thing is that she confirmed my EDD as 31 May. Then she packed me off with an envelope stuffed of papers & an appointment for Tues morning.

I've scanned through the papers & they all seem to heavily favour BF & home births. Whilst I haven't made any firm decisions, my first thoughts are leaning more towards bottle & hospital. So that put me in a bad mood.

I'm also struggling with time off work. Not that they won't give it to me, that's no problem. But I feel as though I'm taking the piss. I had to leave early yesterday for that rubbish appointment, leave early Mon for flu jab appointment & arrive late Tues after MW appointment. I knew I'd find this bit of a struggle - I know that baybee & me come before work - I think this is one of the pitfalls of being older, the fact that work has played a bit part of my life for so long. Did anyone else struggle to get their heads around this?

Anyhoo, if anyone is still with me, thanks . Suppose I feel yesterday was just a bit of an anti climax.

So, Moo if you could be so kind I could do with some cheering up......

Get laying, MooMoo! The ESH command it; enough is enough

I am 12 weeks today and my nausea is still here. Who can I sue for bullshitting that it goes off at 12 weeks?

Loz, the conclusion I've come to about feeling frustrated with MWs and general medical stuff is that being older mums, we're highly-educated, knowledgeable, have been reading up on TTC and pg stuff, and we're used to efficiency, professionalism and so in our jobs (well, not with my fuckwit old Boss, but heyho), running our homes and relationships well and are probably a bit control-freaky and unconsciously set in our ways and used to things being a certain way, that the style and attitude of many people we'll now have to deal with feels really frustrating because it seems really lackadaisical and patronising. We're not used to people treating us like we're clueless and not used to being fobbed off with vague answers or non-committal stuff like you got off your MW. Whilst we can appreciate and empathise that they have loads of people to deal with and a heavy workload, that doesn't help us with feeling fobbed off and like people aren't really being helpful or supportive.

My Miss MW kept being really impressed that I knew terms like 'trimester' and knew to take folic acid, etc. Have found this presumption that everyone is going to be clueless and ill-informed with most of the medical profession. I'm not used to people treating me like I'm thick. Having been a massive swot all my life, I really don't know to deal with it (except for simmer inside and try to resist giving the death stare). I'm also very straightforward about sorting things out so hate the dithering attitude one encounters too.

Pregnancy is strange and new and makes everything seem different and uncertain and it's so aaaaargh-making when the people you expect and trust to guide you through it are a bit wishy-washy and talk to you in that one-size-fits-all Mumsy way.

Of course, this could just be my unlucky experience. I'm not a 'go with the flow' type of gal and I don't do well with people keeping me in the dark or not being definite about stuff, so is also prolly my personality making me feel pissed off about it all. Having spent so much time doing academic research, I find it mental-making when people don't seem to know what they're on about and fob you off with vagueness. Ah well, I guess I really need to learn to chill, as my long journey of patronisation has only just begun

And LOL, you are being daft about taking the odd bit of time off work. The amount of graft you put in means you should never feel guilty about taking time off that you are legally entitled to.

Dammit moo, I was catching up & was VEY excited! Hopefully the sight of Wagner tonight will get things going!!

lorry, sorry your MW appt was not what you expected. They do get more fun as time goes on... But a bit shite about putting your name up next to MW - what is the deal with that then??? And do what you about feeding and where you give birth is totally your decision - the absolutely most important thing is that you are happy.

Scorps please don't give MWs a hard time and I am sorry to hear you feeling frustrated with the interactions you have had so far. MWs are under enormous pressure with targets to meet and I think they do a fantastic job. You don't need to feel fobbed off or patronised, I certainly have never met a midwife who has tried to fob me off and in fact if you show a bit of knowledge I feel they respect you for this. They don't have time to really get to know you and they are dealing with many many people from very different walks of life and often don't have the time to build a rapport with each and every one. I guess they just assume lack of knowledge as they don?t have time to ascertain how much each person really knows. I think a good attitude towards them results in a good attitude and exchange back. That said, each one I have met has been very professional, to the point and very knowledgeable. I just expect in return them to tell me the facts, the options open to me and what the state is with my pregnancy and I have found you get the full picture by questioning. I used to walk into every appt with a note book with questions I had thought of between appointment and get them all answered quickly.

Anyway, it does seem your interaction may be isolated or at least totally different from my experiences.

That is how I try to look at it too okie. The MW who delivered the boy child certainly didn't add joy to my experience, but I figure that anyone who does a job that I could never do still deserves my respect. She gave me my child healthy and happy, and I couldn't ask for more than that.

Where's my baybee???? I've been for a short walk, eaten homemade scotch eggs, lemon cake and bought a chicken and some veggies. Parents here and hogging the telly. Me, Mr Moo and Hairymoo may go for sleeps shortly.

I agree with you all on the MWs. I think on the whole that they are a fantastic bunch of overworked and under-resourced individuals. I personally have had very good people throughout, excepting one particular MW. I sort of freaked out at the time as I was given incorrect advice (told me I needed GTT when I didn't) and the person in question didn't seem to have much of a clue during the appointment. I did complain then and just asked not to see her again. And so far I haven't.

Since then, I realise that I may have slightly overreacted. I think in the early appointments they are just anxious to do the main checks and don't seem to have the time or inclination to discuss every single detail with you. Which is fair enough, but I guess those expectations are not managed with first time mums, who have a slightly more consumer is king approach to their pregnancy. It can be frustrating in that respect. I think as much of it is in the communication skills of the individual and obviously the more experienced mws are better at this.

okie is right, be as upfront when you arrive and have questions to ask. I don't think anyone tries to hoodwink anyone, it can just be understandably a bit bewildering when you feel like you're not being told important information. If you feel like something hasn't been explained or you are not getting the right care etc, phone one of the senior mws or the head of midwifery and discuss your concerns immediately - they are fantastic and will always call you back/listen (I have done this twice). However, ordinary antenatal mw appointments probably DO have to be a bit patronising sometimes and check you are taking folic acid etc. When you think that the person before you might be a 17 year old single mum, it does somewhat make you realise how well informed we all are. Sometimes too well informed. I drive Mr Moo to distraction with my obsessing over the baby position, only to be told that at every mw and consultant appointment that it's completely fine!! I got to the point about a month ago where I just thought, fuck it I really can't carry on re-reading spinning babies every night. This little monkey isn't moving! We will see won't we!

Anyway lots of hairstrokes and reassurance to Loz and Scropy. It is the most massive thing any of us will ever do....

NOW, who's getting kicked out of X Factor tonight?????

I think maybe odd eared Katie...

Right. I have been baking. Chocolate chip cookie anyone? Still warm from the oven.

I quite like her.

on the MW subject. I found I had various ups and downs with them during pregnancy, and following the birth (they can be quite bossy on the ward, but usually only to make sure you and baby are healthy). But from my experience, they are amazing, caring, supportive, wonderful people when it really matters: during labour and birth.

I am soooooooo full of curry. Oh, go on then, maybe one small cookie...

So far, I have been really lucky with midwives. My booking-in appt was very dull, but the lady who booked me in was a sweetie. The midwife who did my last check-up was lovely and spent ages listening to the baby's heartbeat and checking I was ok. I'm very aware that I've lucked out with location, in that most of my care is provided by a small team of community midwives because my GPs is a new-fangled polyclinic with birthing centre.

I think it's important that care is standardised and that people in need of support can access it easily. And if that means assuming that everything should be explained, so be it!

I'll have a large cookie please muse. Is there one that shouldreally be two but they bled into each other? One like that please. Am starving.

Oh, and can anyone give me any suggestions for soft drinks? I am SO over squash, and want something fizzy, but lots of them seem to be so full of sugar they make my heart race. Last time I ate a whole bag of Percy Pigs my BPM was 120!! Oops...

Do the diet drinks do that or are they better on account of no sugar? I don't mind about the aspartamine.

And i don't drink tea or coffee (childlike tastebuds) so my system in only used to caffine when it's redbull & vodka - which is possibly not ideal. (I reckon even hardcore pony might even agree with me on that one!)
So that rules out coke.

So - what are you all drinking girls??

The best midwife I encountered was a man who was there at the birth. He was the best thing ever. In fact Moo if you do end up on the labour ward (not that you will) you must request him (friends have since done this on my recommendation). He is called Angel (Spanish and camp). Don't be put off by him being male he really was the best I encountered during my labour, very caring, very respectful, looked out for Mr C as well as me and just a fucking angel! And yes, where is your baybeeee? Clearly hanging on in there until X Factor has finished.

Right, pass those cookies this way please, one will go nicely with a mug of raspberry leaf tea.

I drink a lot of fresh juice with sparkling water. Lots of it. Apple and Pear, Apple, Apple and Mango you get the picture. Sainsburys do 3 cartons for £4.00. Occasssionly a weak elderflower cordial and sparkling water which is aptly named posh squash in our household.

Ooh - sparking water to fruit juice. Now THERE is a plan. I'll try it - thanks!!

MrsFC I would never knowingly imbibe Red Bull because it smells of vomit. I told a man that once and he said "if your vomit tastes of Red Bull, I'd eat it." Needless to say he didn't get his jump.

I had cravings for plain carbonated water. Drank gallons of it.

I am back on caffeine post birf. Positively dreamy.

Moo shouldn't you be squatting intermittently or summat to get sproggo heading South?

Fanks all for the support and welcome to my new baybee. He is currently snoozing in his Moses basket and is prob dreaming of more opportunities to pee all up the Walls and all over me when he has a nappy change later.

Birf story warts and all to follow. Need to find time to boot up laptop and start compiling the gory details series of events.

Will also put photos on t'oher place once I figure out how to do on my phone.

Looking forward to Crap Factor later.

Wishing all the differs a good night and that any vom feelings disappear damn quick

I like Shloer, cos it makes you sound drunk when you say the name... But it is quite sugary.

Orange squash I love but weirdest thing ever is that it gives me almost instant and horrible heartburn.

I also like juice in the morning (good for iron absorption apparently) but in evening I have a big bottle of own brand fizzy water and slug from that. Sometimes with a light drizzle o' vin. That's gone out the window this week though and have had a glass of wine every night...

Angel sounds fabulous.

Hey, please don't anyone think I was rude to my MW! Just because I like a moan, please don't presume I am anything less than perfectly polite and warm to people! We chatted, I cracked a few jokes, she was personable and she never made me feel like she was rushing me or that I was on a conveyor belt. Even when she had her perturbing anti-Feminist rant, I didn't say anything, I just steered the convo back to the matter in hand. I left the appointment after we'd had a laugh together and I thanked her profusely for her help and she said I'd been a 'delight'. She rang me to double-check something about 30 mins after I'd left and I thanked her again for being so nice. I is a well-brought up girl! But all that doesn't change how annoying it was to have to keep swallowing being treated like a dimbo the whole time.

Like I've already said, I do totally appreciate how heavy their workload is and I do appreciate that when you work with the public, you inevitably develop a set persona of how you talk to everyone. I've worked with the public a lot and you have to develop that persona just to be able to cope with all the different peeps you'll encounter.

My major gripe, as I say, was the patronising way she addressed me. I accept that you do have to do a job like that presuming that many people will not know anything, so that you can ascertain how much info you need to give them, but surely when you realise that someone is clever and clued-up (and an adult), you don't continue to speak down to them? It's one thing to be pleasantly surprised that someone knows to take folic acid and not huff glue, etc., but it's another thing to keep marvelling at them in tones usually reserved for a toddler doing their first poo in a potty. She was seriously talking to me like 'Ooooh, you're SO clever! That's AMAZING! Well done you! You're such a clever thing, aren't you?!'. I mean, how do you react to that?! I just smiled and said confused thank-yous.

I have no problem with MWs automatically explaining every little detail to me, even if I know most of them - in fact, that makes me very happy and I wholeheartedly approve, as a control freak. That's not what I'm talking about. It was the way she talked to me like I was a really stupid child and that when I did ask questions (not obscure ones, either), she didn't know the answer or appeared to not want to tell me, saying things like 'why do you need to know that?' or 'well, no-one ever asks me that'.

I s'pose it doesn't help that where I live has the highest rate of teen pgs in Northern Europe! It's not like it's v rough or all a bit downtrodden (our little area is pretty swanky) - although I realise that plenty of teens get pg who aren't from dodgier areas. I guess if the majority of her patients (clients? What's the right term?!) are young, scared and know nothing about pregnancy (and possibly don't really want to be told stuff), you get into a habit of treating everyone like that. Doesn't mean I have to like it, tho'!

Wahey - hey silver!!! Lovely to see you - here have an extra large brie canape.

BTW some kind soul put a copy of new parents by Miriam Stoppard on our doorstep earlier... no name signed. Obviously we look well thick. Anyway had a quick look and seems v good.

Squatting to commence during x factor.